


You're In My Veins

by TJ (rainbowsmuke)



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: 5SOS - Freeform, Alternate Universe, Cashton, First Time Sex, Homophobia, Homophobic Slurs, M/M, Muke - Freeform, Muke Clemmings, Racial slurs, Smut, mentions of child abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-01
Updated: 2018-10-27
Packaged: 2019-07-05 06:47:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 98,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15858381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowsmuke/pseuds/TJ
Summary: An AU RP I've done with my girlfriend in which the boys have grown up in Manassas, VA.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so just a few quick things. This is a roleplay that my girlfriend and I have done over the past several months. I've gone ahead and formatted it so it's easier to read (hopefully). My girlfriend plays Luke and Calum and I play Michael and Ashton. I'll break down each part of the story by the threads as they come and leave a little notation about what's going on in the overall story in case there's any confusion. Also, please forgive any typos/grammatical errors you come across. Since this started as a private RP between us, we weren't too fussed about such things. I've tried to proofread is as best I could but I may have missed some things! Other than that, I hope you guys enjoy it!

**MICHAEL:** Growing up in Manassas, Virginia was not the most exciting place and as far as Michael was concerned, the Civil War history that included a battleground to visit was even less exciting. Of course, every year there was a reenactment of that battle and the entire town would turn out, dressed in period clothing, to participate in the festival that was held over the weekend. Michael didn’t get it. It wasn’t as though the entire Civil War, and the reason it had even happened, was one of America’s most stellar historical events and he had never liked how it had been turned into something to celebrate. It wasn’t something to celebrate by any means but even he had to admit that certain parts of it were okay. It was something he did with his family every year when he was a child and even though he and his sister would watch the reenactments, it was mostly the carnival rides they were interested in. And the junkfood. That was always a plus. As Michael had gotten older he’d felt less and less inclined to hang out with his family the entire day. He likes his family, of course. They were middle class and even if Michael hadn’t gotten everything he’d wanted handed to him, he had everything he needed. Ultimately, there were no complaints. His parents didn’t seem to mind when he wandered off to go hang out with his friends but they’d often make him take his sister along. Usually he was able to shake her off after a little while.

As per usual, the festival started on Friday night and the downtown area was closed off for vendors, a beer tent and a couple of stages for local acts to perform. A park on the next street over was where a carnival had been set up and the rides (which freaked Michael out way more since he’d gotten older) had been tested for issues throughout the day. There was no way he was getting on any of them. The first re-enactment would take place the next morning (the jury was still out on whether he was going to actually go to it) and people had started trickling into the street to socialize. Last year, he had been in a band with a couple of friends and practiced for months to play for the festival. For only being a group of fifteen year olds, they weren’t terrible but they also hadn’t lasted and this year, Michael was playing with a different band that included himself and two other members: his best friend Calum, and their mutual friend, Ashton. Which was probably a good thing because if he was that meant someone else would be too and that only served to chap his ass.

Luke Hemmings was, for all intents and purposes, his biggest rival. They had been classmates since kindergarten and Michael was sure that at one point they had played together but as they got older, they’d become competitive over everything. However, they were never more competitive with each other about anything like they were with music. Both of them were guitarists, both self-taught, both of them talented. Michael hated Luke. Not just because he was a gifted guitarist (and a singer) but because Luke was arrogant as hell. He’d always been one of the popular kids who people adored for no real reason. Yeah, he was attractive and his family was one of the most wealthy in Manassas (the prided themselves on being one of the ‘founding families’ which made Michael roll his eyes) but other than that he didn’t see the big deal. And no, he wasn’t jealous. Not at all. Why would he be? Michael wouldn’t want to be like Luke for love or money. Luke was everything that Michael didn’t want to be.

And his dislike for Luke was entirely mutual. Even though they had learned to mostly ignore each other over the years that didn’t mean there wasn’t the occasional spat. Michael swore that Luke sometimes went out of his way just to annoy him and he took the bait every time. He couldn’t help it. More than once Calum had to hold him back from punching Luke in the mouth. It burned Michael up even more that Calum seemed to actually like Luke. In some sense, he felt betrayed but he also wasn’t the type to make someone choose their friends. If Cal wanted to hang out with Luke, that was fine but Michael wouldn’t be anywhere near that. 

Michael was meant to be meeting up with Calum and Ashton that night just to hang out. They were playing on the main stage tomorrow night and they knew they ought to be practicing (none of them were particularly confident at the moment) but they wanted to have a good time. Hopefully ease some of the tension they felt. Ashton kept staying it felt like they were missing something or someone but Michael didn’t get it. What could they be missing? They had a guitarist, a bassist and a drummer, along with the fact all of them could sing pretty well. Michael had argued they didn’t need anything else. Green Day and Blink-182 only ever had three members and they had been mad successful. Ashton remained unconvinced. There weren’t that many guitarists they knew and the ones they did weren’t up to snuff. Except for one and Michael would rather eat a Tide pod and die than agree to him joining their band. 

The crowd of people had thickened since he’d started looking for his friends. They had agreed to meet by the bridge that crossed over from the street to park where the carnival was letting people in, exchanging money for tickets or wristbands. Michael stood on his toes to try and see over people’s heads and when that didn’t work, he stood on a concrete block in the grass over a drain to get some height. A moment later, he spotted his two friends and waved them over. “Guys, over here!” They noticed him and began weaving their way through the crowd and Michael jumped down off the concrete.

 

 **ASHTON:**  This was not a situation Ashton wanted to be in and though he didn’t generally have a problem with anxiety this was testing that tolerance. No one in the entire school - or the town for that matter - didn’t know that Luke Hemmings and Michael Clifford couldn’t stand each other. It didn’t matter what the situation was or if the reasons had gotten lost over time: they just did and it had caused issues over the years. Luke liked to bait Michael and even Ashton had to admit to the former having the advantage. Luke was popular, came from a founding family, and could be an arrogant prick at times. Ashton didn’t have anything against him personally but he could see why people became irritated with him. Being a pompous ass wasn’t becoming of anyone but Calum seemed to like the guy well enough and Ashton didn’t mind him either. He could be pretty fun when he was being chill. But Ashton and Calum were stuck in a bit of a predicament because they were friends with Michael too. What really made this the space between a rock and a hard place was the fact they needed another band member. Both Ashton and Calum accepted that but Michael didn’t feel the same way and had routinely insisted they were fine. It had been a point of contention between the three of them lately though this...what they had done...was about to be a catalyst, he was sure.

The three of them were set to perform on the main stage of the festival tomorrow night. Though they had only been playing together for a year, they had performed at every town event they could and 5 Second of Summer had become a local name. Just last month they had traveled to Arlington to play in a club for the first time and had booked another gig the next month and while the performance had gone off without a hitch, it hadn’t been mindblowing either. That was why Ashton had felt they needed something more. Not just a lead guitarist but a rhythm guitarist as well. Since that performance he and Calum had been discussing it and they’d seen fellow students play from their school (YouTube was a big thing) but none of them were as good as Luke. When he’d pitched the idea to Calum, the bassist had looked at him like he’d lost his mind and immediately tried to tell him no way. Ashton argued that Luke was not only a great guitarist but he could sing and he was good looking. Unfortunately, in a world as shallow as the one they lived in that was a big deal. Ashton even tossed it in Cal’s face that they were _both_ friendly with Luke and Michael was going to have to compromise. They both were. It had taken him days to convince Calum to agree to asking Luke to join the band and when he finally did that was when they decided they needed to tell Michael. It wasn’t going to go over well and they both knew it.

The plan had been to tell Michael tonight at practice before he had chickened out and changed their plans. Later on he’d told Calum he wanted to do it in public just in case Michael attempted to kill them both because at least there were witnesses. Cal had said something rather unsavory about his cowardice which had earned him the finger. They’d ended up making out after that but that wasn’t really important. Ashton wasn’t gay, by the way. Michael had been suspicious as to why they’d cancelled practice the night before a gig but he’d eventually accepted the explanation that they should take a night just to have fun and be sixteen. So that was how they had ended up agreeing to meet by the bridge. Ashton had texted Luke earlier in the day and told him they’d meet up with him later on in the evening. Neither Michael nor Luke had any idea what was going on and they weren’t going to know until all of them were in the same place.

“I feel like I’m gonna puke,” Ashton groaned as he walked beside Calum, hands shoved into the pockets of his skinny jeans as they looked for Michael. They had decided the best way to do this was to rip the band aid off and get it over with. A shout from a familiar voice made him look up and he found Michael waving them over. The anxiety in his chest fluttered and he followed behind Calum toward their friend. He greeted Michael and tried to school his features so the guitarist didn’t know anything was amiss. The three of them made their way across the bridge, paid for their wristbands, and entered the carnival. Music played throughout the area along with the sound of games being played and the air release of the rides. Ashton reached out to tug on both Calum’s and Michael’s shirt sleeves. “Let’s head over to the water gun game and try our luck,” he suggested. Not that Ashton had any intention of blowing all the cash he had on rigged games but that’s where Luke agreed to meet him and Calum at. 

 

 **CALUM:**  When Ashton first brought up the possibility of Luke Hemmings joining the band, Cal thought it was a bad joke. It took a few days for him to come around to Ashton's point of view: yeah, they needed another member, yeah, Luke was really good, and yeah, they both liked him. But they needed Michael too. And if the two of them couldn't work it out, it would screw up what they already had. Calum believed that if Luke didn't piss Mikey off so much, he would've come around on his own to the idea of adding a rhythm guitarist to the band. He also had a really strong voice and rivalries aside, they all wanted to get out of Manassas, play for sold-out arenas, not local gigs in clubs or small-town festivals.  
  
And if they played up that angle and Luke didn't say anything too douchey, Mikey might agree to adding a rhythm guitarist. He was probably gonna pissed off at them but in his experience, the only person Michael ever held a grudge against was Luke. He couldn't stay mad at them, right? They were too cute. _"I feel like I’m gonna puke."_ Cal rolled his eyes, bumping Ashton's shoulder gently. "This was your idea," and he wished the other guy would stop saying stuff like that because it just made  _him_ more anxious. "Be cool," he muttered through his smile, cutting through the crowd to join Michael. After they paid for entry to the festival, Calum glanced to Ash when he felt a tug on his sleeve. The drummer suggested they head over to the water gun game - which was where they agreed to meet Luke.  
  
But Michael didn't know that yet. "Yeah, great idea," he agreed instantly, and only got a little distracted by the giant funnel cake some kid was carrying past him (it looked really good and he wondered where the stand was - y'know, for future reference). They reached the water gun booth and it was pretty typical state fair stuff: a row of water guns fastened to a table with stools on one side and on the other side, a row of moving targets. These targets were clowns with open mouths. "That's creepy as fuck," he remarked. "Didn't they have ducks last year?" Ducks were much better than clowns, although he guessed he'd rather shoot a clown than a duck. How many ducks on TV were homicidal killers or straight-up evil? None. How many clowns? So many. _So many_. Statistically, based on all the movies and shows he'd seen, clowns were a bigger threat.  
  
_"Hey boys."_ Calum turned towards the drawl - which he knew really well - and it belonged to Luke, whose hair was looking extra quiff-y today. "Hey Luke. What a coincidence." He glanced at Michael with an encouraging 'look, it's been five seconds and he hasn't said anything shitty' kind of smile. _"Not really. Ashton told me to meet you guys here."_  "Oh right." Not a completely random meeting. He wasn't in the habit of keeping secrets from his best friend. Well, except for one. He didn't tell anyone about him and Ashton. They made out sometimes. It wasn't a big deal. He wasn't gay either. But uh, fuck, how were they supposed to do this again? Calum completely blanked for a second. "Um," fuck- oh yeah, "So I heard that your band is breaking up. That sucks." It was because the bassist and the drummer were both seniors from the Catholic high school, and they were going to college, "You know, _we_  were just talking-" he gestured to himself and Ashton, "-about how cool it would be to have a rhythm guitarist in our band." Not smooth.

 

 **LUKE:**  Luke agreed to meet Calum and Ashton by the water gun game; he'd rather be at the carnival than with his parents. This year his father was making the big speech on Saturday, welcoming the performers and the spectators to the reenactment, speaking about the history of Manassas, and inevitably it turned into this circle jerk about founding families and pillars of the community and core values of the town, etc. And so he'd been practicing that for the past two weeks, and his mom wouldn't get off his back about wearing his "nice clothes" instead of his black jeans with the knees ripped out and his Nirvana t-shirt. He was dodging his whole family today, grandparents, inlaws, his cousins from the Catholic school. They were all assholes.  
  
Luke was in the process of blowing off texts from his mom when he glanced up and over the lens of his Raybans, recognized Ashton and Calum. And they brought fucking Michael Clifford with them. Luke hated him. He was kind of a weirdo, awkward as hell, but at the same time, smart (which was annoying) and the best guitarist he knew (much worse). What pissed him off was that music was the one thing in his life that he genuinely cared about, and here comes this nobody - literally  _nobody_ \- who he couldn't get away from. Michael was all over the music scene in Manassas and Annapolis with a built-in drummer and bassist in his friends. _Their_  friends, technically. And it was frustrating to have to compete with him. In everything.  
  
Except for, you know, homecoming king and shit because Michael didn't have that many friends - but a plastic crown was a crappy consolation prize when the other guy was swiping live performance gigs right out from under him. Fuck Michael Clifford. Luke pushed his sunglasses on top of his head and shrugged when Cal mentioned what everybody knew, which was that his bandmates were leaving for college next year. "More for them than me," he replied with a smirk. He was the most talented of the four by far, and the only singer (for a reason). He'd been with the same band for the past couple years, and they were alright but not as good as they should've been. As he wanted them to be. His parents thought that - with his bandmates leaving for college - he'd finally drop this whole 'become a musician' thing and focus on a worthwhile pursuit. Getting into AP classes, graduating with honors, so he could go to Princeton or Columbia like his parents and major in finance.  
  
What a fucking nightmare. Luke raised an eyebrow when Calum pointed out that he and Ashton had been talking about adding a rhythm guitarist to their band. "You could definitely use one," he said with a smile, "There aren't many lead guitarists who can nail both parts. Besides, we can cross over into lead guitar, lend some much needed stage presence." He wasn't saying that he had more charisma than Michael- wait, wait, yeah he was. So much more. He couldn't finish that statement without laughing. Everyone loved him. "I'd be happy to play with you guys if Clifford asks me himself." He wanted to hear it from Michael. 

 

 **MICHAEL:** Michael blinked in confusion when Ashton suggested they blow money on a game. They never played the games because they were always rigged. Well, at least he didn’t play them because he wasn’t losing his cash on something as dumb as carnival games, and the only time he’d ever seen his friends play them is when they were trying to impress a girl. What money he had from his after school job he socked away for new equipment or toward buying a van. Lugging their instruments and all the shit that went with them on buses was getting to be really difficult and annoying. The three of them had agreed to fork over money toward the cause with the hope they’d have enough at the end of the summer to make that happen. Granted, it would be crappy he was sure but better than nothing. “Who are you trying to impress this time?” he asked, eyeballing his two friends as they made their way toward the water game. This year it was clowns instead of ducks and he could almost see Calum shudder at the sight. “Don’t be a wuss.” He shot his friend a grin. Cal’s dislike of clowns had always amused him.

A familiar and unwelcome voice reached his ears and Michael’s head snapped up to find himself face to face with Luke. He bristled immediately, his jaw tensing in annoyance at the mere sight of the guy. Jesus, Michael hated his stupid hair and his stupid eyes and his really expensive (yet really cool) clothes. Luke brushed off Calum’s comment that this was a coincidence and said that this was Ashton’s idea. Michael cut a sharp look to the drummer who looked a bit like he was going to puke. “What? Why would you invite him?” What the hell? Both Cal and Ash knew the two of them couldn’t be in the same place for more than five minutes together without a fight happening. Why would they invite Luke to hang out with them. Deep inside, Michael had an idea of what was happening. Calum and Ashton had been talking for weeks about need a second guitarist and all the ones they knew sucked except for Luke. It’s why he had been adamant they didn’t need a fourth member. They were fine how they were. Because if they got their way and Luke joined the band it would be like the ninth circle of Hell for Michael. 

Michael’s attention slid from Ashton to Calum as the bassist told Luke it sucked his band was breaking up (which Luke has something arrogant to say in return) and how the three of them had been talking about adding a rhythm guitarist. Michael’s jaw dropped and he felt his body tense. “Are you fucking kidding me?” he exclaimed. “No, you and Ashton have been talking about it. I told you we didn’t need one!” Anger flared inside his chest, along with panic, and Michael’s fists clenched at his sides. This was some kind of betrayal and he gaped at his two friends. They had tricked him into coming here so they could break the news to him that they had decided to ask Luke to join them. They knew if he had known this ahead of time he wouldn’t have come. How could they do this to him? 

Luke’s voice was like nails down a chalkboard and he cringed as the other guitarist explained why he’d be a great addition to the band. The more he talked the more Michael wanted to throat punch him. And then he said something that blindsided him completely. _I’d be happy to play with you guys if Clifford asks me himself._ Like hell that was ever going to happen. He turned on the other guy, eyes flashing with rage. “Fuck you. It’s not going to happen. I’d rather shove a hot poker in my eye than ask you to join our band.” Next he turned on his two bandmates. “And as for you guys...fuck you both, too. This is bullshit and I can’t believe you’d fuck me over like this. I’m outta here.” Michael wasn’t going to stick around to see what happened. He was too mad. He needed to leave and cool off before he said or did something he regretted. 

 

 **ASHTON:**  The moment Calum had brought up the idea of Luke joining their band, Ashton’s hand found its way to the back of the bassist’s shirt, gripping the material so tightly his fingers began to ache. He watched the exchange go down like a bomb being dropped on a building and groaned when Luke proclaimed that he’d be a good addition and that he wanted Michael, specifically, to ask him to join them. That had been enough to set their lead guitarist off and Ashton winced as he shot off at the mouth, telling Luke he’d rather ‘shove a hot poker in his eye’ than ask him to join. That rage then turned on him and Calum and he could see the betrayal on his friend’s face. Ashton frowned, his belly squirming with discomfort. This had been his idea and now he wasn’t sure it was the right decision. Yes, they needed someone who could make their band better and bring them full circle. And yes, he did believe that Luke was their best option but was it really worth losing Michael as their friend? He’d have to come around to the idea, right? Right.

Except now Michael was storming off and Ashton looked at Calum, his mouth a tight line. “You go after him. He’s less likely to punch you than me.” Michael and Calum had been friends longer. A sigh left him as the bassist took off after Michael and he turned to Luke, scowling at him. “Why’d you have to do that? We’re trying to make this work but it’s not going to if you act like a prick all the time.” Ashton liked Luke. He really did but that display of narcissism had been seriously unnecessary. “We probably could’ve avoided all that drama if you’d just kept your trap shut.” Rich kids were such a pain in the ass and Luke was definitely not absolved of that pain in the ass-ness. Ashton reached up and scrubbed a hand down his face. “Look, I know you’re tryin’ to get some kind of rise out of Mikey but can you do me a solid and just...not antagonize him? I know you can do it. I have faith in you.” Okay so laying it on a little thick but he was desperate. 

 _Hey, you guys need to move unless you’re going to play._ Ashton rolled his eyes at the carney but instead of arguing, he grabbed Luke by the sleeve and pulled him away from the game. They were in the middle of the carnival and it was noisy. The drummer lifted his head to try and see above the crowd of people to see if he could spot Calum and Michael but he had no such luck. It wasn’t a great idea to bring Luke around Michael anyway since the other guitarist would need time to chill out. “I’mma text Cal and find out where he wants us to meet him.” Ashton was positive they wouldn’t see Michael again for the rest of the night. In fact, he wasn’t sure they’d see him at all until before they went on stage tomorrow night. So he shot a text to the bassist before sliding his phone into his back pocket. 

“You know Green Day, right? And Blink?” Even though they’d been working on writing their own music for the past few months, nothing was finished or practiced. They’d been a cover band since the start and that worked for now. Especially if they were introducing a new member into their band last minute. If Luke didn’t know the songs, they were well and truly fucked for tomorrow night. Practices from this point on we’re going to be really, really interesting.

 

 **CALUM:**  Cal figured it'd be better to rip the bandaid off instead of beating around the bush; he slipped his hand behind his back and touched Ash's reassuringly (the other guy had a death grip on his shirt). This was the right thing to do for the band. And he wasn't having second thoughts, not even when Michael's jaw dropped and he turned to them looking angrier than Cal had ever seen him before. Michael was right: when he said 'we', he meant himself and Ashton. Anytime they tried to bring up adding another member to the band, Michael shut it down. "Because you know who we'd ask," he retorted defensively, "Mikey, come on..." It wasn't the rhythm guitar or another set of vocals that he didn't want in their band, it was Luke Hemmings. But even  _Michael_  had to admit that Luke was a really good musician.

Which was one of the reasons why everybody put up with being such an asshole. Luke wasn't doing them - or himself - any favors when he demanded the Mikey be the one to ask him to join the band, when he knew damn well that the guitarist had nothing to do with this. Calum narrowed his eyes at Luke irritably, the words setting Michael off the way he knew they would. He winced at the visual, jaw set when his friend turned that anger on him and Ashton."Michael..."he could've handled the 'fuck you' but he wasn't trying to fuck anybody over. But the other guy was storming off before Calum could even work out what to say to  _try_  to fix this so they weren't completely screwed tomorrow (and because he hated fighting with his friends). "Shit," he dragged his fingers through his hair, hands on top of his head. He dropped his arms and glanced at Ashton, who suggested he go after Michael. "Yeah, okay," Cal agreed.

Grimacing, he took off, jogging to catch up with his friend in the crowd. "Michael!" He didn't stop, and Cal nearly ran his elbow in a kid's cotton candy tree, but he cut between two booths and managed to get ahead of the other guy, stepping in front of him with hands outstretched. "Look, I'm sorry about the ambush, okay?" He and Ashton both knew that was gonna piss Michael off; they should've seen this coming. "But we tried to talk to you about this. A lot," they never got far enough to drop Luke's name because Michael wouldn't even consider it. "And I know Luke Hemming's an asshole," he added quickly, "But he's the best rhythm guitarist we know. And he's a damn good singer. We want to do what's best for the band. The four of us together, we'd be... we'd be amazing." They were already good, but good didn't always cut it. And Luke had money. He had charisma.

Plus he had a fanbase already (in the form of the whole class of freshman girls and some of the boys). "Can't we at least try it?" Calum pleaded with Michael. If it didn't work, then it didn't work. Maybe they wouldn't be able to stand each other long enough to record anything - but he was banking on the fact that Michael and Luke loved being musicians more than they hated each other, and that they really wanted a shot. To get signed. To move to L.A. To play huge arenas and get the hell out of Manassas for good.

 

 **LUKE:**   _Fuck you._  "You wish," he retorted smugly. Sometimes it was just too damn easy to get a rise out of Michael Clifford. He said he'd rather shove a hot poker in his eye than ask Luke to join their band. "It'd probably be an improvement," that wasn't really true. Not that he noticed Michael's eyes or anything, but he guessed they weren't that bad. For eyes. He sucked so much. And Luke wasn't sorry to see him go, shaking his head when Calum ran after him. Michael fucking  _knew_  how great he was. Why couldn't he just admit it? It wasn't fair that he got the best bassist and drummer in their town (better than his previous bandmates, and cooler too). Luke still couldn't believe they got a gig in Annapolis.

He was really jealous. He was soooo jealous. It was a weird feeling. He could've scored something like that with his parents, but he didn't want them to know - and he didn't want them involved. He wanted to do this on his own. And it would be a lot easier if Michael Fucking Clifford wasn't in his way. Luke had never had to work this hard for something he really wanted. The rhythm guitarist glanced to Ashton and noticed the drummer was scowling at him. "What?" he demanded defensively. "He's the one throwing a tantrum," he didn't deny acting like a prick but he didn't like being accused of it either. Ashton pointed out that Clifford storming off could've been avoided if he'd just 'kept his trap shut'. Luke scoffed in response. "Yeah right," where had Ashton been the last... hell, million years? He and Clifford had never liked each other. That hadn't changed. And he wasn't taking the blame for this. He never took the blame.

But the bottom line was, Clifford or not, Luke did want to be in the band. And a condition of doing that - apparently - was trying not to antagonize Michael. He sighed, rolling his eyes in response. "Fine," he'd resist the easy target and be the bigger man (he already was, he was taller) in this situation. For a couple days, at least. "As long as he knows that you guys aren't doing me a favor,"  _they_  asked  _him_  to join. He wasn't sure he could stomach Michael Clifford telling him what to do. He liked Ashton and Calum, he'd listen to them (when he felt like it), but Michael? Forget it. He was a tool.

Luke shot a withering glare to the gestapo manning the clown shooting booth - wow, what a life goal, huh? - but Ashton dragged him away before he could start a fight with the minimum wage carnival worker. Ashton said he'd text Cal and Luke nodded in response, pulling down his sunglasses to avoid the sudden glare of light. Ashton asked him if he knew Green Day and Blink-182, and Luke grinned. "You're kidding, right?" he'd heard them play before, and he learned the same songs. "Yeah. Send me your set list and I'll be here tomorrow." He didn't say what he was thinking - which was that he wouldn't consider it a big loss if Michael decided not to show. Luke was just as good a frontman.

 

 **MICHAEL:** Michael had never had the best temperament. Things upset and annoyed him easily and he knew a lot of it was because of his struggle with anxiety. He’d always had strong opinions about things and when he felt like he was being betrayed it resonated deeply. Right now, that’s exactly how he was feeling and part of him was pissed because he should have seen this coming. Calum and Ashton had been talking about adding a fourth member for weeks - probably the last few months - but he’d always nipped it in the bud. Logically, he knew he was at least partially at fault for the ambush but that didn’t make him any less pissed off. Anger welled inside of him and he didn’t know where he was going - he only knew that it was away from his friends and away from that smug bastard, Luke Hemmings. The nerve of that guy to think Michael would ask him to join the band was astounding. It would never happen. Not in this lifetime or any other.   
  
He heard Calum call to him over the people and the noise of the carnival but he ignored him and kept walking. Michael didn’t really want to hear the excuses he was bound to have. It wasn’t until Calum cut him off, forcing him to stop short, that he sighed. “Cal, I don’t want--” He didn’t have a chance to finish because Calum pushed on, telling him that they had tried to talk to him about this several times. Michael knew that was true and he knew he’d shot them down each time. He opened his mouth to speak but his friend pushed on, explaining that Luke was the best rhythm guitarist they knew and he had a good set of pipes. Michael knew all of this, of course. Luke certainly wasn’t shy when it came to displaying his talents. What went unspoken between them was the fact Luke also had money. It could solve a lot of their issues when it came to needing equipment replaced and that van they desperately needed to haul their crap around in. Working at a GameStop and comic shops after school wasn’t cutting it.   
  
Calum ended his argument with how amazing the four of them could be and Michael frowned. He  _hated_  that Michael was right about that. They could be amazing if Luke joined them but it didn’t mean he liked the idea. Michael was nothing if not stubborn when it came to certain things. He was worried that he and Luke wouldn’t be able to come to some kind of agreement and it would ruin them in the long run. “Fine. I’ll give this a chance. He has until we play Annapolis and if it’s not working out by then he’s gone. Got it?” Annapolis was only a month away and that was plenty of time to gauge whether or not the four of them could make this work. Agreeing to this felt like he was swallowing acid and a sick feeling settled into the pit of his stomach.   
  
“I’m going home because I’m still pissed at you guys,” he muttered. Michael pushed his way past his friend. “Don’t do that to me again.” For now he just wanted to be left alone to deal with his anger. Tomorrow he would show up and they would play their set. Hopefully Luke would know what the hell he was doing and they’d figure it out from there. Michael didn’t have a lot of hope this was going to go over without a hitch. Not when he and Luke had spent nearly their entire lives disliking each other. 

 

 **ASHTON:**  Ashton groaned faintly. “Yeah, yeah...we know that we aren’t doing you a favor. Get off your damn soapbox.” It wasn’t about doing anyone favors. It was about him and Calum wanting to make the band the best they could so they could get the hell out of Virginia. Neither of them wanted to be stuck here with their families. Michael’s parents were cool for the most part but his own were a nightmare and Calum was often looked at like an alien for being half-Maori. Manasses wasn’t exactly the most progressive place in the country. Luke was probably the best off of all of them. Not only did have family have wealth but they had status. Still, he didn’t seem to keen on living out the rest of his days walking in their shadows either. “Cal’ll talk Mike down from the edge and all we need from you is to keep your mouth shut long enough to get through our set tomorrow. Think you can do that?”   
  
There was a small comfort in knowing that Luke knew the bands they covered. “I’ll text it to you.” First, he sent Calum a text to find out where he was so they could meet up with him. Secondly, he found the setlist in his phone and texted it to Luke. They were only playing six songs for their set and Ashton hoped Luke and Michael didn’t kill each other before it was over. The next month was going to be dedicated to rehearsals for the show in Annapolis. Provided that once again, they made it through the month alive or things were going to get pretty interesting.   
  
Cal texted him back, telling Ashton where he was and that Michael had split for the night. Ashton sighed and shoved his phone into his back pocket. “Mike left but you can chill with Cal and I unless you got other plans.” He was extending the offer even if he didn't’t think Luke was going to take it. They were friendly, sure but it wasn’t as though they hung out often. Luke had a whole other squad that involved all the entitled rich kids. Ashton was staying the night with Calum after they were done here so he’d get the details of his conversation with Michael later. Right now he didn’t want to bring it up in front of the other guitarist. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Ashton and Calum part ways with Luke after the fair, Ashton spends the night with Calum and things get hot and heavy. Internally, each boy struggles with their feelings and Ashton struggles with his sexuality because of his religiously zealous parents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! So this is for the Cashton lovers! This is smut. Lots of smut. So be warned ahead of time! All the characters are at least 17 years old which is an exception to the Age of Consent laws in Virginia. As long as both parties are between the ages of 15-17 and consenting, it's not illegal. I know most people probably don't care about this but I wanted to put this out there just in case. With that out of the way, I hope you enjoy this part!

**ASHTON:** Ashton and Luke had met up with Calum a few moments later and spent a good chunk of the night letting the previous drama roll off their backs. When Michael wasn’t around for Luke to annoy, he was a decent guy and fun to hang out with. If they could just get the two of them on the same page then all would be right. It was going to take work and a lot of it. Ashton knew he and Calum had their work cut out for them. When they parted ways with Luke that night, it was nearing midnight and the two of them hurried back to Calum’s house, just barely making the midnight curfew and earning a raised brow from Mrs. Hood. Thirty seconds later, the clock chimed midnight and they were heading up the stairs and toward Calum’s room. This wasn’t the first time Ashton had stayed the night and he’d become something of a semi-permanent fixture in their household. It was better than being home with his own family.   
  
“Tomorrow night is either going to be awesome or really bad.” He commented as he slid out of his shoes once they entered the bassist’s room. He left them by the door and went to flop onto his friend’s bed. “What did Michael say before he took off?” Now that Luke wasn’t around to be irritating about it he wanted to know. Ashton lay back on the mattress, legs bent over the edge and fingers knit together over his chest. He stared up at the ceiling with a slight frown. It would be a miracle if they even made it to the Annapolis show. Maybe they were just flat out being too optimistic with this. Yes, he was having doubts about it.

 

**CALUM:**  Calum had a good time with the other guys, but he was worried about Michael. On the bright side, there was no chance of them ever pulling a stunt like this on him again - because there was nobody he hated more than Luke. But Cal still felt bad that Michael had left and still hadn't texted him back. He managed not to miss curfew and kicked off his shoes next to Ashton's, pushing the door shut behind them. "Yeah," he smiled wryly in agreement. Either they'd gel and pull off a great performance (awesome) or Michael would snap and punch Luke in the face (really bad). Cal unbuckled his belt and shoved his skinny jeans down, stepping out of them, tossing them on his desk, and rifling through a dresser drawer. Ash asked about what Michael said to him.

"He's still pissed off," he replied, changing into a pair of Bat signal themed pajama pants, "But he said he'd give it a shot. If this doesn't work out by the Annapolis show, Luke's gone. I said you'd be okay with that." Cal pulled out another pair of black drawstring pants - he couldn't remember if these were his or Ashton's - and tossed them on the bed next to his friend. "You're okay with it, right?" They'd know by then whether or not this would work. Cal sat down next to Ash, glancing down at the other boy, and reached over to squeeze his knee gently, reassuringly. "We did the right thing, Ash." Maybe they didn't break the news as smoothly as they could've, but hell, it was Mikey and Luke. They hated each other. At least no one had punched anyone else. That should be a win, right? Cal agreed to Mikey's ultimatum about Annapolis because it seemed like the least they could do for springing Luke Hemmings on him without warning. And it was better than Calum hoped for - plus, it meant that he'd probably show up for their set tomorrow.

That was what Cal had texted Michael about - still no answer, fingers crossed. "Annapolis is a really big deal," the bassist added, leaning back to lay on the bed beside Ash, his own hands behind his head, "We need to put on the best show we can, and now we've got Luke so... we'll be able to." There might be industry people or radio show jockeys there, and even if there weren't, the bigger stage gave them more exposure. He was saying all this to make Ash feel better but it was also for him, reminding himself why they pissed off one of their best friends. He hated that. "He can't stay mad at us forever, right?" he was half-joking, but he did feel guilty. Cal shifted onto his side, propping his head up with one hand, and looked down at Ashton. "Did you talk to Luke?" about not being such a dick to Mike? It couldn't hurt.

 

**ASHTON:**  Ashton looked up when he felt the pair of pants fall onto the bed next to him just before Calum came to join him on the bed. He had spent enough time here that some of his clothes had gotten lost among his friend’s, and occasionally showed back up again like the pajama pants waiting to be changed into. “Don’t really have a choice but to be okay with it, do I?” No one liked ultimatums but they were going to have to hope for the best on this one. A hand pressed to his knee and squeezed but Ashton wasn’t sure who Calum was trying to reassure. Maybe both of them. The drummer nodded his agreement about Annapolis being a big show. Not only did they have the set list they were going to play tomorrow but some original content that Luke was going to have to learn. The guy was at a bit of a disadvantage because of that but he’d either put the work in or get told to beat it. The ball was really in his court so he could choose to play or forfeit. Annapolis would be the first time they would play original content, and if it went well the plan was to get their stuff out over the internet and see if it spread or not. So in a sense, it was a better idea they got Luke on board before all that happened, especially if he was going to give them a leg up. He did have a lot of friends and underclassmen drooling over him. His pretty face certainly helped.   
  
A laugh left him as he sat up and slid off the bed so he could change from the skinny jeans to the pants. “He probably could but I don’t think he will.” Michael was a grudge holder for sure. He’d held a grudge at Luke since they were in kindergarten. “Once it’s obvious Luke makes things better he’ll chill out. Give it time.” Ashton shoved the jeans off and replaced them with the pajama pants. He pulled his shirt off them and folded both articles of clothing before leaving them on the chair of Calum’s desk. Playfully, he kicked at his friend’s feet until Calum got them out of the way so he could hook his foot beneath the trundle bed and pull it out from under Calum's bed. It was already made. It had served a good purpose when they were younger but for the last four or five months, Ashton barely slept in it. Instead, he usually crawled into Calum’s bed with him and depending on the night they either cuddled or fooled around. Those were some of his favorite moments with the bassist though he would never admit to it. The last thing he did was dig his phone out of his backpack and set it on the desk before crawling into the trundle bed.   
  
A deep sigh left him and he glanced up at his friend, hands folded behind his head and silent for the moment. There were a lot of things to consider; such as what they were going to do if this all worked out. Ashton wanted to get the hell out of Virginia more than any of them but he’d by lying if he tried to say the idea of fame didn’t scare him a little. It came with a lot of responsibility and a lot of bullshit. Though far less bullshit than being stuck in this yuppie town with your right wing conservative parents. Deep down Ashton knew that as long as he had the other boys then he’d be fine. He just hoped none of them lost their way and their love of music kept them grounded. Ashton could still feel the mild frustration over how their night had gone, and he hoped he’d gotten through to Luke to just leave Michael alone. “We did the right thing.” he nodded, reassuring himself once more. And maybe a little bit to reassure Calum as well.   
  
A faint smile crossed his features, Calum looking down at him over the edge of his bed and he propped himself up on his elbows. It put him closer to the bassist’s face and he tipped his head up so he could press a playful kiss to his mouth. “This probably makes me a shitty friend,” he said when it was broken, “but I’m kinda glad Michael didn’t come over tonight.” Not because Ashton didn’t love his bro, he just liked getting Calum alone on occasion so they could do things. Private things. Ashton kissed him again and let it linger this time. It was tentative at first so he could see if Calum was going to stomp on the brakes or not. When Calum didn’t, Ashton pushed forward and used his tongue to part his friend’s lips. A soft hum of pleasure came from him as he tasted the other boy’s mouth.

 

**CALUM:**  Ashton pointed out that he didn't have a choice but to agree to the ultimatum, and Calum shrugged in response. True. Michael could hold a grudge but he didn't want Luke Hemmings to be the reason. "Yeah," he nodded in agreement. Ash was right. Mikey just had to see what Luke brought to their band and then he'd understand why they did what they did. Cal grinned when he felt Ashton's feet kick his, and he lifted his legs so his friend could pull out the trundle bed. He rolled over to lay near the edge of his bed, because that made it easier to talk to Ashton. He looked over the edge of the mattress at his friend, and wondered what he was thinking about until he repeated that they'd done the right thing. Yeah. Ashton propped himself up on his elbows and Cal felt his heart jump into his throat, anticipating the kiss. He leaned down to meet Ashton's mouth, smiling into it. "Hm?" The drummer said he was a shitty friend, and Calum wasn't sure what he meant by that - until he admitted that he was glad Michael hadn't come home with them. "Me too," he admitted with a lopsided smile. Calum guessed that made them both shitty.

Ashton kissed him again and he leaned into it, into the hot, slick warmth of his friend's tongue between his lips. Calum responded instantly, his own tongue slipping against Ashton's, over his bottom lip and into his mouth. One hand gripped the edge of the mattress and the other one touched the drummer's face, sliding his fingers back into his hair. He loved the sounds Ash made when he kissed him and he loved the way the other boy touched him at night, the way he let Cal get away with touching  _him_. Stuff like this never happened around Michael or anybody else, and it used to confuse him when Ash would be so sweet, so sexy, when they spent the night together and then the next day, he didn't want Cal crowding him like that. It took him awhile to get used to it, to not take it personally because (like he always said) they weren't gay. And Cal knew he could tell Ashton to knock it off and he would but... he didn't want to. He loved this. He loved the way Ash made him feel.

Ashton was hot as hell, too, and it was hard to think of anything else when he was shirtless. Cal's hand slipped on the sheets and he almost fell off the bed, catching himself by breaking the kiss and digging his knees in. Glancing from Ash's swollen lips to his eyes, Cal shifted back on the bed, "Wanna come up here?" He was about to fall off the mattress, and it wasn't comfortable leaning over like that. Cal rolled onto his back and scooted over to give Ashton enough room, smiling at the other boy when he agreed. It was Calum's turn to prop himself up on his elbows, sucking his bottom lip between his teeth while he watched his friend, waiting to see what he'd do, if he was still in the mood to fool around. He tried not to push Ashton on stuff like this, because he could get weird about it. But that usually didn't happen until the next morning. So he reached for Ash to tug him into another kiss, and while they kissed Calum slid his hands over the other boy's bare shoulders and around his neck.

 

**ASHTON:**  Deep down Ashton knew he was being unfair to Calum with the expectations he had of him. He wanted to keep these moments completely private, locked away behind closed doors so no one ever knew and it wasn’t because he was ashamed of Calum. No, it was completely the opposite. He was ashamed of himself for the desires he had for his best friend. All of his life, Ashton had been raised to believe conservatively and that love and marriage was between a man and a woman. That’s what God wanted and homosexuality was a sin. An abomination. His parents believed homosexual people were all sinners who would go to Hell and as a child, Ashton had believed that to. It wasn’t until he’d gotten older and learned to think for himself that things stopped making sense. How did his parents believe that someone who had lived a good life, was a good person, was going to be denied entrance to Heaven just for being unapologetically in love with someone of the same sex. But a child rapist and murderer could simply ask for forgiveness and get past the pearly gates. No, that didn’t make sense at all. Plus, some of his friends were queer and they were amazing people. Hell, Michael was queer and one of Ashton’s best friends in the world. Not that Ashton’s parents knew that. Ashton could never, ever let his parents know about Calum or the things that happened between them. They could never let anyone know because the more people who did the more risk there was of his parents finding out. They had smacked him around for lesser things so he couldn’t even imagine the punishment he’d get for sleeping with another boy.   
  
And even though he realized it was unfair to Calum, part of him just really hoped his friend understood why he did the things he did and wouldn’t end up resenting him for it. Ashton didn’t think he’d be able to deal if Calum ever walked out of his life. One day he knew it might happen; that Calum would get fed up with the situation and end all of this. Ashton was prepared for it (or so he thought) and always left room for Calum to tell him to stop. Calum never did though.   
  
Calum almost fell off the bed and the kiss was broken. Ashton laughed as the bassist regained his balance and asked him to join him on the bed. He nodded before crawling off the trundle bed and onto Calum’s bed. Ashton didn’t hesitate to crawl on top of Calum, knees on either side of him and palms pressed to the mattress as well. Ashton grinned down at his friend before Calum leaned up to kiss him again. A soft moan escaped Ashton as Calum’s hands moved along his shoulders. He could feel calloused fingertips against his skin but he didn’t mind that. It was part of being a musician. They had learned a lot of ways to prevent it from getting too bad over the past year and a half but it was still a thing. He braced himself on one hand so he could cup Calum’s cheek gently, his thumb moving along the smooth skin just below his eye. If he couldn’t be affectionate with Calum during the day, when everyone was around then he could at least be that way now. Just for a little while.   
  
Ashton broke the kiss and smiled faintly against Calum’s lips before he bit down on his lower lip gently. They had been doing this for ages and he was learning the things his best friend liked and didn’t like. “Take your shirt off,” he said softly. He leaned back and tugged at the hem of it, impatient to get the bassist free of the material. Once it was off, Ashton let it fall off the side of the bed to be forgotten about. He pressed a hand to Calum’s chest and pushed him back onto the bed playfully. As his hand wandered down the length of Calum’s chest, Aston's eyes followed the same path and he bit down on his lower lip. Ashton loved everything about the other boy’s body, the smooth caramel colored skin that was soft and he never grew tired of the taste of, and the shape of abdomen muscle beneath the skin. Ashton didn’t believe there was any one person in the world that made him feel the things he felt with Calum.   
  
Fingertips came back up to graze over the darker skin of Calum’s left nipple at the same time he leaned down over the other boy. Ashton nudged the bassist’s chin back with his nose gently so he could press open-mouthed kisses to the front of Calum's throat. “Will you tell me what you want me to do to you?” he asked softly, breath hot against the other boy’s Adam’s apple.

 

**CALUM:**  Ashton told him to take off his shirt and Calum nodded, sitting up and reaching behind himself to pull it over his head. The shirt disappeared after that and he didn't notice where it fell, and he grinned at Ashton when Ashton pushed him back on the bed, exploring his chest with one hand. Calum watched his best friend's face, his own expression soft and affectionate; no one had ever looked at him the way Ashton did, and it wasn't so bad, not being able to kiss him in public. He got why - the town they lived in sucked, and he felt like an alien half the time because he was one of the few kids of color in school, and ever since the election he'd had three randos come up to him and tell him Trump was gonna 'send him back where he came from'.

He bet most of those idiots didn't even know where he came from (not 'Asia' which wasn't even a country, dillholes, it was a continent - and it was the wrong one!). He was desperate to move somewhere else - like L.A. His mom had brought up the possibility of him switching schools, living closer to D.C., before he entered high school. But he didn't want to leave his friends so he figured he could stick it ouy, but as soon as he graduated, as soon as he got famous with the band, he'd pay to move his whole family out west, his sister, his parents. They'd be a lot happier in California.

Cal knew things would be worse if people knew about them. And he knew about the Irwins, knew the kind of people they were - so he didn't blame Ash. He didn't even mind the girlfriends (at least he had cool taste in girls, unlike some people  ~~Luke~~ ). Once they got out of Manassas, things would be different.

Calum tipped his head back with a moan when Ashton grazed his nipple and nudged his chin back, pressing a string of warm kisses down his throat. Calum blinked up at the ceiling, fingers threaded through Ashton's hair, and tried to remember how to breathe. His best friend always had this effect on him. Ash asked Calum to tell him what he wanted Ashton to do to him and he swallowed. "I want you to touch me, Ash," he answered, voice shaky with anticipation, "Feel how hard I am for you,  _fuck_ , I want you so bad." All they'd done was kiss and his cock was already tenting his pajamas, stiff and hot and uncomfortable. If he was alone he'd be jerking off already. "I want your mouth on me. I want you to make me come, make me say your name." They both liked it when he did.

He liked sucking his best friend off too, and jerking him off, and kissing him. Ash was the closest Cal had ever gotten to sex. They'd never had sex, he didn't think... that was ever going happen between them, and he'd had girlfriends but they'd never lasted long enough to go that far. He'd gotten blowjobs and handjobs before, but he wasn't really interested in that stuff from girls after he and Ashton started fooling around. Maybe that would change if he met someone really cool, but he already knew  _the_  coolest person in this armpit of America and it was his best friend. Cal wasn't looking anywhere else and he was okay with that. And when Ashton was on top of him, kissing him, touching him, he was  _really_  okay with it. He was happy.

 

**ASHTON:**  Each time he woke up in the morning after spending the night curled up with Calum and pretending like it didn’t mean anything, it sent a shock of guilt through him. Ashton knew it was wrong to play his best friend the way he was but he didn’t know how else to show Calum how he felt. He couldn’t bring himself to say the words out loud. That made it too real. He’d never asked Calum to stay single or not have girlfriends or other people to mess around with because he did the same thing. Ashton dated around a lot because it kept people from looking too closely or seeing something he didn’t want them to see. Maybe it was paranoia but whenever the idea of someone finding out about his sexuality cropped up, it sent Ashton into a full blown panic attack. The only reason he hadn’t told his parents to go fuck themselves was because he had two younger siblings. Lauren and Harry. Ashton took the brunt of his parents abuse and if he wasn’t there he worried it would fall on his siblings. He couldn’t let that happen. So Ashton did what he thought he had to do to keep people off his back and let himself get lost in Calum at night. Several times Ashton thought he should explain just that to Calum but it felt too much like making a promise he wouldn’t be able to keep. So he said nothing at all.   
  
Ashton's mouth had moved to the base of Calum’s throat as the other boy spoke, telling Ashton what he wanted and it made the drummer smile. He liked when his friend told him things like that and how much Calum wanted him. Maybe it was an ego thing or a form of validation he needed, he didn’t know. What he did know in that moment was that Calum was hard beneath him already and he could feel the shape of his cock through the pajama pants. A soft moan came out of the drummer as his shifted his hips down on top of Calum’s, grinding against him slowly. Ashton had become familiar with so many of the things that his friend liked and didn’t like. He liked knowing that he could get Calum so hard and needy. “I like when you say my name when you come.” It made him feel so many different things at once. Ashton bit down on his lower lip as the friction between them sent small sparks of pleasure through him. It was never enough just like this and he wanted to be inside of Calum so badly, but they hadn’t quite gotten to that point. Actually, Ashton was a little afraid of having sex with the other boy because he was afraid of hurting him. They hadn’t actually talked about it either.   
  
For the moment, Ashton put the thought aside and his mouth moved down the other boy’s chest. He kissed and nipped along his collarbones and down the center of his chest, along the sternum. The tip of his tongue retraced the path his lips had taken and he surged up to kiss Calum again, hungry and almost demanding. Ashton’s tongue slipped past his lips and he groaned faintly as he tasted every part of the bassist’s mouth before breaking it. Everything about Calum was so achingly beautiful that sometimes Ashton didn’t think he was real. One day, he thought he might wake up to find out Calum had just been some elaborate dream. That never actually happened but if it had then Ashton would have been happy to stay in that alternate reality forever.   
  
As Ashton made his way back down the other boy’s chest, his lips and teeth grazed each of Calum’s nipples before continuing on. Ashton kissed along his ribs and over the muscle of his belly. He stopped just above the waistband of the pajama pants and ran the tip of his tongue over the smooth skin. He loved the way Calum tasted. Ashton stopped then, and shifted so he was between the other boy’s legs. Ashton grinned down at Calum as Ashton's hands moved over the tops of Calum's thighs, one stopping and the other continuing on to tease his cock through the pajama pants. Dark eyes watched the other boy, biting down on his lower lip as he did so. Ashton loved to watch the way Cal reacted to him, the sounds he made and the pink tint that crossed his skin from arousal. “You’re so fucking hot, Calum,” he murmured, his own erection giving an impatient jolt as his fingers hooked into the waistband of the pants. Slowly, Ashton tugged them down off of Calum’s hips and when the bassist lifted up to make it easier, Ashton groaned from the sight of his cock, swollen and leaking already. “You’re so easy to get riled up,” he laughed, teasing his friend. Ashton didn’t mind one bit.   
  
“Do you want me to swallow your dick?” he asked, smirking faintly. When Calum agreed, Ashton bent over and ran his tongue over the head of his erection, moaning at the taste of him. Then he swallowed half of Calum at once, pausing only to gather his wits before taking him in far enough that the tip nearly touched the back of his throat. They had discovered that Ashton was blessed with a gag reflex that wasn’t overly sensitive.

 

**CALUM:**  Calum swore under his breath when Ashton responded, grinding their hips together, the length of his cock rubbing against his friend's over and over again. He could feel the pre-come seep into his underwear, the way the fabric clung to the tip of his erection. Breathless and flushed, he still grinned up at Ashton when the drummer admitted that he liked hearing his own name whenever he made Calum come. "That's 'cause you've got an ego big enough to match your cock," he teased in response. Calum went for humor over saying anything too emotional because he didn't want to make things weird; things were really good between them right now. Cal wanted to keep it that way. "I like it." The ego, or at least the front of one, and the cock. He liked everything about Ashton. More than liked it, to be honest.

Calum stroked his fingers through Ashton's hair gently, rhythmically, as the other boy kissed his collarbones, down the sternum of his chest, his tongue retracing the path of his mouth. Calum arched up into it, and when Ash leaned up to kiss him, Cal lifted his head to meet the other boy's mouth, wrapping his arms around his neck and pulling the drummer down on top of him. The bassist sucked Ash's tongue into his mouth, stroking it with his own, lips meeting, pressing, sucking, and he gasped for breath, head falling back, when it was broken. Ashton's lips grazed his nipples and Calum hissed between his teeth, squirming slightly as Ash made his way down his ribs and belly. When the drummer's tongue swept along the skin above his jeans, Cal's whole body jerked, stomach tight and hot. He blinked up at his friend, sitting between his legs, hands on his thighs. One of Ash's hands slipped from his leg to his cock and Calum moaned, pursing his lips to stifle the sound of it.

Ashton murmured that he was hot and Cal felt himself flushing, heat settling deep in his belly. "You always know what to say to get in my pants," he replied softly, playfully, sucking in a sharp breath as Ash's fingers hooked into his waistband. Cal lifted his hips, moaning softly at the drag of fabric over his ass and cock until it was bared to Ashton. No one made him feel wanted the way that Ashton did, no one got him this hot, this turned on, and he didn't even mind being called easy - because it was so fucking true. "You're just that sexy." And he knew his friend wasn't complaining about it - just like Ash knew the answer to whether or not Cal wanted him to swallow his dick. "God, yes." Ash gave the best blowjobs. He didn't have  _that_  much experience, but he had enough to know that he wasn't missing anything. No girl had ever gotten him off like Ashton could. And it didn't hurt that Calum loved the guy.

The drummer bent over and ran his tongue over the head of Calum's cock, and he whimpered, mouth falling open. A rush of wet warmth engulfed his erection, Ash taking him so deep that his balls almost touched the other boy's chin. Calum moaned through a shiver that ran from the nape of his neck to his hips, squeezing his eyes shut. He dug his fingers into the sheets, thighs, knees, tightening around Ashton's body between them. The friction of his best friend's tongue against the shaft sent sparks of pleasure through his cock, his mouth velvety soft, wet, and warm. "Ash- Ashton," he panted, the pressure spreading from the base of his spine. Cal forced himself to blink, vision fuzzy, and looked down at his friend, watching. He loved to watch Ash suck his cock because he was so... so beautiful, so fucking incredible, and the rhythm of his head, his lips, his tongue, was the best. "Ash, I'm... I'm gonna come," he warned the other boy, licking his lips as another wave of pleasure hit. Calum shuddered, struggling to hold off on the orgasm.

 

**ASHTON:**  Sometimes, when the two of them were alone and were able to be like this, Ashton would let his mind wander a little bit. He imagined what it might be like to leave this place behind and go somewhere else where it wouldn’t matter if he loved Calum openly and freely. They all wanted that freedom and their music - their band - would give that to them. Ashton imagined not having to hide when he wanted to kiss Calum or tell him how much he loved him, because deep down Ashton really, really did love his best friend, and it was more so than platonically. Ashton couldn’t pinpoint exactly when his feelings had started to change but it had been before they’d began engaging in any kind of sexual activity. In some sense, Ashton realized that because he couldn’t be completely honest with Calum he hoped that the physical relationship they had would communicate what he couldn’t verbally. At least for right now. Ashton knew one day it might change but he wasn’t thinking about any of that right now. He was thinking about the here and now. Ashton was thinking about how much he loved Calum; his heart, his mind, his body...everything. He never wanted to be away from the other boy.   
  
Each sound that Calum made only encouraged him and Ashton shivered when the bassist told him he was going to come. He drew his mouth back on Calum’s cock and released it with a faint  _pop_. Ashton grinned up at Calum and shook his head. “Not yet. I’m not done.” His fingertips moved along the outside of Calum’s thighs and Ashton turned his head so he could press wet kisses along the smooth skin. It wasn’t enough, of course and Ashton stopped and sucked the skin between his lips and teeth so he could suck a dark mark into the flesh. It was the only place he could leave a bruise on Calum that wouldn’t be seen. Once he was done, Ashton left another mark on Calum’s other thigh so they matched. Satisfied, Ashton spread his legs further apart and licked the pad of his thumb, leaving a liberal amount of saliva on it, and slid his hand under Calum’s balls so he could stroke his perineum teasingly. Ashton had never done this before but he hoped it was okay and that Calum liked it. It was experimental at best but each time they messed around he tried something a little bit different. Ashton bit down on his lower lip, smirking faintly when the stimulation brought a positive reaction out of Calum.   
  
Sucking in a breath, Ashton dipped his head between the other boy’s legs and teased at his balls with the tip of his tongue before sucking one of them into his mouth, warm and heavy against his tongue. He moaned softly and Ashton's eyes slipped closed as he toyed with it. Ashton released one in favor of the other a moment later, and his thumb moved over Calum’s perineum until the spit dried too much to make it pleasurable. He released Calum's balls and leaned back, half sitting up so he could catch a breath. While he did so, Ashton let his eyes roam over his lover and he smiled, eyes blown wide with his arousal. He wanted to tell Calum he was beautiful and that he loved him. The words were on the tip of his tongue but Ashton couldn’t get them out.   
  
Calum was so hard and Ashton was impatient to make him come, so he leaned back down and took Calum's cock into his mouth again. Ashton rolled Calum’s balls in his hand as he did so, his mouth tight around the shaft and rhythm deep. Ashton felt the pulse of the bassist’s erection against his tongue just seconds before he came and when he did, Ashton groaned softly as Calum spilled over his tongue, sticky and a little salty. He took as much of it as he could before he was forced to let Calum go, panting as he wrapped his fingers around the base of Calum's cock and squeezed gently to milk him of his release. When Calum settled, Ashton laughed softly and nuzzled his cheek against his hip. “Very sexy,” he purred. Dark eyes watched his partner as he ran his tongue over Calum's softening erection, cleaning it of the last traces of come. Then he crawled back on top of Calum and kissed him, slow and deep, tongue parting his lips so Calum could taste himself in Ashton’s mouth.

 

**CALUM:**  Ashton's lips slid along his cock and at the warm, wet  _pop_  of his mouth Calum groaned - tilting his head back with a shudder. He couldn't come yet - Ashton said he wasn't done and Cal thought he was going to pass out before they got to the end of this, it felt so damn good - and he braced his hands on the other boy's shoulders, blunt nails digging into the skin at the first press of lips along his skin. "Ash... Ash, baby,  _please_ ," he begged, sucking his bottom lip between his teeth as Ashton left wet hickeys on his thighs. The endearment slipped out on accident, the kind of thing he'd never call Ashton except when he was naked under him, thoughts fuzzy and body strung out with pleasure. Ash spread his legs further apart and Cal didn't fight it, a startled sound dragged out of him when a hand slipped under his balls and Ashton rubbed that stretch of skin between his ass and his dick. "Oh God, oh  _f-fuck_ ," he moaned, eyes rolling back and thighs quaking. And when the drummer sucked on his balls, still stroking him, Cal couldn't do anything but pant Ashton's name over and over again, a whimper escaping when Ashton leaned back.

Swallowing thickly, vision blurring, Calum glanced down in time to see Ashton's head duck down between his legs and suddenly that tight, wet, hot suction was on his cock, lips and tongue sliding down the length, balls tight and tingling. And Cal couldn't hold onto it, coming off the bed as he orgasmed; he let go of Ash and buried his face in the crook of his own elbow, stifling the shout. He flung his arm out with a gasp, riding the pleasure as Ash milked the last of it from his dick. Cal was sweating and flushed, and he blinked down at his friend. He tried to speak but he couldn't, managing a smile at the sound of Ashton's laughter. Cal brushed his fingers lightly against the other boy's hair as he nuzzled as his hip, and he leaned back with a grin and a breathless half-laugh. Ashton surprised him when he ran a tongue over his cock, and Cal shivered with a low moan. "C'mere," he mumbled hoarsely, sliding his arms around Ashton's waist as his friend crawled over him, kissing him long and deep; and he tasted like Cal's release.

The bassist broke the kiss to catch his breath, shallow and uneven, and he smoothed his fingers through his Ashton's hair. Looking up at Ashton, his eyes, so close they were practically nose to nose, Calum was reminded how stupidly in love with Ashton he was. So stupidly in love with him. He would do anything for him. And Ashton loved him too even if it wasn't something he'd ever say out loud. "That was... fucking incredible," he grinned up at the other boy, pulling him into another kiss. "The best, Ash. I've never... come that hard in my life." Each time was even better than the time before, and every time with him was amazing. And as soon as he re-learned how to breathe, he'd take care of Ashton too. His heart wasn't jumping out of his chest now. "Where do you want me?" he asked lightly, suggestively. After the orgasm he'd just had, Cal was willing to suck Ash off any way he wanted: he could do it on his knees, or with Ash on his back, or Ash could sit on his face.

 

**ASHTON:**  The endearment hadn’t gone unnoticed by Ashton but he didn’t say anything disparaging about it and he never did. It wasn’t the first time it had happened and it wouldn’t be the last. In truth, Ashton liked hearing them because it was the only time he  _could_  hear them. It meant more to him than Calum realized and so often Ashton wished he could say those things out loud to Calum. Ashton wished he could love his best friend proudly and publicly, but the fall out that would come from doing so would be devastating. Ashton knew that he would lose Calum, lose the band, and his siblings if his parents ever knew that he was sleeping with a boy. He pushed the limits already with the things he did. Deep down, Ashton still believed what he’d been taught all his life; that God hated queer people and he would burn in Hell for his sins. Ashton still went to church on Sunday mornings with his family and often found himself feeling sick with guilt during the sermons. It ate at him from the inside out and that’s when Ashton usually tried to avoid Calum for a couple days. Not that it ever worked because Calum pulled him back in every time. Ashton knew that it’s because he wanted him to. He wanted to get lost in that sweet escape with the only person in the world that knew him better than he knew himself.   
  
The kiss was broken and he laughed softly as Calum told him how incredible it was, that he’d never come so hard before. It pleased Ashton to the core to know that no one Calum had ever messed around with had done the things for him that Ashton could. It was partially ego and partially because it ensured that Calum was his and his alone. For the moment he wasn’t thinking about all the terrible things in life. He was thinking about Calum and allowing himself to get lost in the scent of his skin, the flush of his darker skin and how his own body just wanted him so so much. Calum asked where Ashton wanted him and instead of answering right away, he kissed his best friend gently as he thought about it. There was something he’d been wanting to try. Something that would kick it up a notch but he wanted to make sure Calum was okay with it first. Ashton broke the kiss and looked down at him. “Can we try sixty-nine?” he asked. “There’s something...I kinda want to try but I wanna make sure you’re good with it first.” Ashton really wanted to make Calum come again. It was one of his favorite things to do. Ashton felt a little embarrassed to be bringing it up so he buried his face against Calum’s neck and pressed fleeting little kisses against the skin. “Will you let me finger you while you suck me off?” he mumbled the question.   
  
There was a heartbeat of a pause before Cal answered him, agreeing to this new thing he wanted to try and Ashton smiled against his neck. “Okay.” Ashton slipped off his friend so he could rid himself of the pajama pants he’d put on, kicking them onto the floor along with his underwear. Aston crawled over Calum so he could dig through his nightstand for the lube he knew was in there. “Got this so...I guess...we can switch positions now…” Ashton blushed with a little bit of uncertainty and embarrassment. This was new territory for the two of them and he knew it might be a little uncomfortable for Calum. Ashton had done some research and he knew there was a spot inside of his friend (as there was with all dudes) that would make them come almost instantly. He read it could be stimulated if you had long fingers, which he did and his curiosity had grown since then.   
  
Ashton moved to lay on his back on the bed and bit down on his lower lip as Calum positioned himself over him, his dick still soft from having just recently come. Ashton guessed he’d find out how fast he could turn Calum on again as his hands moved up and down the length of his thighs on either side of his head, the lube lying on the bed next to him to be used later. Ashton raised his head slightly so the tip of his tongue slid along the head of Calum’s cock teasingly. His tongue slid down along the vein and between his balls, then along the space between his erection and his ass and he groaned softly. Resting his head back against the bed, Ashton was pleased to see Calum’s arousal was starting again. “I like it when you’re eager like this. Makes me feel wanted.” He turned his face to press a kiss to one of the bruises he’d left on the inside of Calum’s thigh earlier. “And it’s sexy as hell.”   
  
Ashton reached for the lube blindly and found it a moment later. He popped the cap and poured some of it into his palm to warm it before he coated his index and middle finger with it. Closing it, Ashton set it back down and drew in a slow breath. The only thing he regretted was that he wouldn’t be able to see Calum’s face as he made him orgasm a second time but that was okay. Ashton was really hard and uncomfortable, and he really wanted Calum’s mouth on him. “Let me know if you want me to stop,” he murmured softly. With that, Ashton used the tip of his index finger to trace Calum’s entrance teasingly, coaxing the tight muscles there to relax. As he did that, Ashton’s tongue teased at his balls until he was fully hard again. Ashton went slowly as he slid his middle finger inside of his lover.

 

**CALUM:**  Cal liked when Ash kissed him like this: gentle, slow, it made his chest tight with all the things he wasn't allowed to say. He blinked up at the drummer, eyes widening slightly in surprise, when Ashton asked whether or not they could sixty-nine. They'd never done that before. But Ash wanted to try something new and even before he'd thought it through, Calum was nodding along. "Yeah." Whatever it was, he'd be good with it. Ashton pressed his face into the crook of his neck and the bassist smiled, fingers sliding into his friend's hair. Those fingers stilled around the same time Ashton asked to finger him. It wasn't that Calum didn't want that, it just... it felt like Ash might be working his way up to sex, which would be a big deal. Calum was pretty sure he was the only one in the band who was still a virgin which was sort of embarrassing, he guessed, or it would've been if he'd  _tried_  to get laid and couldn't. But he was so into Ashton that even when Calum dated, it was more to have something to do - someone to hang out with - while Ashton was hooking up with a new girl. Was he just waiting around for Ash? He wasn't sure. Calum didn't want to think about it now. "Yeah," he agreed, smiling into the kisses.

He wanted to do it, and he wanted to make Ashton happy... and he let go of the other boy when he sat up to pull off the rest of his clothes and dig up the lube from the nightstand. Caum looked up at Ashton and softened at his blush, which was cute and it made him feel less nervous about this. "Sounds good," Cal smiled at the other boy reassuringly. He scooted up and shifted to the side until Ashton laid back on the bed. They'd never done this before and Calum was a little nervous as he pressed his hands into the mattress, straddling Ashton, knees braced on either side of his head, his ass and cock positioned a few inches above Ashton's face. Calum was glad Ashton couldn't see his face, how flushed he was, looking down at Ashton's erection. He closed his eyes, swallowing thickly, when he felt his friend's hands moving up and down his thighs, warm and calloused in a few places (but not too rough, Cal loved Ashton's hands). A gasp hitched in his throat when Ashton slid his tongue over the head of his cock, and a tingling warmth lanced right through Calum, balls tightening.

Cal moaned deep and low as Ashton's tongue found its way behind his balls, breathing out hot and heavy over his friend's erection. He rolled his pelvis desperately, melting into the sensation, a needy sound escaping his throat that Calum couldn't even be embarrassed by. "I want you," he panted, thighs trembling under the kiss. Ash never had to wonder about that. Cal would always, always want him. "Want this." He didn't want Ashton to stop; he'd never tell him to stop. Something wet pressed against his entrance, warmer than he expected, Ashton's lubed finger teasing at his muscles - which contracted at first, before relaxing with the roll of his tongue against Cal's balls. He couldn't do much more than gasp unevenly, mouth open, vision blurry. The sensation curled intent and hot in his stomach, and when Ashton slid his middle finger into him, Cal grunted, wincing slightly. It didn't exactly hurt but it wasn't comfortable either. "Don't stop," Calum insisted breathlessly, head hanging down, mouth brushing Ashton's dick. His gaze refocused on that; lips parted, Calum licked at the head of Ashton's erection, tasting pre-come at the back of his throat.

The bassist didn't go slow; digging his fingers into the sheets, Cal shoved his mouth down, all but choking on Ashton's cock: sloppy, wet, slippery, his mouth and tongue sucking as much of Ashton's cock as he could fit in his mouth. The hot, tight clutch of his throat seized up around the tip of Ashton's erection and Calum fought the gag reflex, drawing back just a little, nails digging into Ashton's hips. Calum moaned around the taste of Ash's dick, greedy, eager sounds because this was all he wanted. Each pump of Ashton's finger inside of Calum made him squirm, hips moving in a slight, shivery rhythm, fucking himself on Ashton's fingers, and he spread his thighs as wide as he could.

 

**ASHTON:**  Whatever nervousness or embarrassment Calum was feeling was reflected in the way Ashton was feeling. It was more awkwardness than anything, trying something new and not really being sure how it was going to work. Ashton bit down on his lower lip as he slowly worked his finger into his lover, hesitating at the grunting sound that came from Calum. He only continued when Calum told him not to stop and Ashton drew in a deep breath as he pressed his finger into him up to the knuckle, Calum’s words resonating through him and making his chest tight. His heart felt like it was going to burst and Ashton wanted so badly to tell his best friend what he really felt. If he could figure out his shit it’d be great.

Ashton gasped as he felt a tongue, hot and wet, against the head of his dick and it was followed by a faint groan, his eyes fluttering. They didn’t close though and he sucked in a quick breath. Ashton was so stupidly hard and Cal’s breath against his erection was causing him to shiver slightly. Ashton’s brow knit faintly as he concentrated on Calum, his finger shifting in and out of him. He stopped only when he felt Calum’s mouth suddenly swallow him. “Jesus Cal…” he whined softly, back arching faintly as the wet heat engulfed his cock. Ashton had no idea Calum could do that and his mind raced, his body shivering as his stomach tightened.   
  
Calum’s body had opened to him and Ashton forced himself to keep his thoughts somewhat in order so he could get the other boy off again. Gently, and even more slowly than he had been before, Ashton added a second finger and pushed in deeper. He was looking for that sweet spot inside of Calum that Ashton knew would bring him the most pleasure. Ashton had read about it pretty extensively so he knew that it wouldn’t take much, just a brush, to stimulate and have Calum gasping. He just hoped his middle finger was long enough to accomplish that since he didn’t think sex was on the table for them just yet. Ashton wanted to, he just didn’t know how to bring it up because he knew Calum and he knew what it would mean for both of them. It was something they couldn’t just do without emotional involvement and Ashton didn’t know if he could handle that. It also wasn’t something he wanted to think about at that moment so he didn’t.   
  
Cal’s mouth on his erection was sending small waves of pleasure through him and he couldn’t help the small moans and ragged breaths that came from him. Ashton was going to come sooner rather than later. “Cal, come with me,” he panted softly, though loud enough for the other boy to hear him. Ashton shifted just faintly so he could run the tip of his tongue along the underside of Calum’s erection, along the vein, and when he felt Calum's body contract he knew he’d found the right spot. Ashton groaned as he continued to brush that spot again and again, enjoying each jerk of Calum’s body as he did. Ashton's body tightened then as the pleasure built in the pit of his stomach to a breaking point. “Fuck… _fuck,_ ” he whimpered softly. “Cal, I’m coming.” Ashton wanted to warn the other boy in case he didn’t want to swallow his release.   
  
Ashton cried out then, back arching and the rhythm of his fingers stuttering as he came and his eyes slid closed. Colors burst behind his eyelids, bright and warm and violent all at once. No one did for him what Calum did. No girl he’d ever slept with gave him such a rush or made his heart beat triple time. Only Calum. It would only ever be Calum and deep down Ashton knew that. 

As the pleasure began to subside, Ashton settled against the and laughed softly when looked down and realized Calum had come on his chest, the release warm and sticky against his skin. Ashton didn’t mind. Slowly, he eased his fingers out of Calum and let his head fall back against the pillow. “You’re incredible,” he murmured softly, affectionately.

 

**CALUM:**  Calum moaned around his friend's cock, sliding his hands over Ashton's thighs and between his legs, cupping his balls. The flat of his tongue dragged along the hard length of Ashton's erection, and Calum hollowed out his cheeks, lips tight, bobbing his head with each sound Ash made. Calum's rhythm stuttered as Ashton worked a second finger into him, groaning around his cock, and Ashton told him to come. Ashton's fingers touched something deep inside of Calum and his whole body tensed, the muscles in his stomach rippling. With each thrust of Ashton's fingers, Calum arched his back with a strangled cry, muffled by Ashton's dick. Calum pushed back on Ashton's fingers, the movement drawing them in deeper, all he could think was  _more, more, more, more_. Ashton came with a hot, salty rush of heat that filled his mouth and ran down his throat, and the taste of it pushed Calum over the edge. Cal released Ashton's length with a sound between a cry and a shout, coming onto his chest. Ashton's release ran down his chin and Calum pressed his forearms into the bed with a whimper.

Breathless and spent, Calum couldn't move for several long seconds. The pleasure of Ash's mouth on his cock and his fingers in his ass, it was too much, it was  _amazing_ , and he couldn't believe he'd come twice already. His knees trembled and he felt like his whole body was made of...something, he didn't know. Calum only summoned the strength to move, and to get his ass out of Ashton's face, when Ashton pulled his fingers out of him. Cal made a small sound of protest before he forced himself to roll off of Ashton, ending up on his back next to the other guy, his head by the drummer's feet and vice versa. He smiled slightly in response to Ashton's compliment. "I'm giving you a thumb's up in my head, I can't... move." Calum couldn't even lift his hand, he was so exhausted. Exhausted and really, really satisfied. For a few minutes Calum didn't say anything, not until he managed to catch his breath enough to shift on the bed, pushing himself up enough to change positions, so that he and Ashton were facing the same way.

Stretching out next to his friend, Cal turned his head towards his bandmate and reached for him with one hand, tilting Ashton's face to his. "You're incredible too," he murmured, kissing Ashton gently. "We should definitely do that again." Maybe not tonight though, because Cal felt like he was about to pass out. He didn't want to go to sleep though. He knew if he went to sleep, he'd wake up tomorrow and it wouldn't be like this. The mornings were the hardest part, but he still thought it was worth it to spend nights with Ashton like this. Calum rolled onto his side and rested his head on Ashton's shoulder, sliding one hand over his chest. Calum fucking loved his chest. Ashton's body was hot as hell. And his hands... "Your fingers are so long,"he laughed a little, reaching for one of Ash's hands to interlace their fingers, bringing it to his lips to kiss each of Ashton's knuckles "That was amazing." He loved them.

 

**ASHTON:**  The two of them lay there for several moments, spent and out of breath after coming that hard. Ashton didn’t think he’d ever experienced anything like that before and he doubted he would again. He could feel Calum’s body pressed against his own and his hand found Calum’s hip, fingertips moving over the soft skin gently. Ashton needed to find something to clean the release off his chest but the idea of moving was a terrible one. So it wasn’t until Cal moved that he did as well, and as the other boy shifted, Ashton leaned over the side of the bed and reached for a shirt (he wasn’t sure if it was his or Cal’s) and wiped the mess up off his skin. Ashton balled up the shirt and tossed it into the hamper near the door, actually making the shot, before he settled back down next to Calum. Calum reached for him then and his words made Ash smile before they kissed. Ashton laughed softly and nodded. “We can definitely do it again some time.” But no, not tonight because the sleepiness had begun to set in and Ashton was warm and comfortable pressed against Calum. For a moment, Ash wondered if Cal’s door was locked so his mom or dad couldn’t just walk in to find them naked and tangled up. He was way too lazy to get up and check though.   
  
Calum lay next to him, his hand against Ashton's chest and Ashton looked up at the ceiling with a faint smile. In the morning, they would pretend this hadn’t happened. They wouldn’t talk about it and Ashton would pretend like nothing about their friendship had changed. He wished he wasn’t such a coward and that he could tell Calum the truth. Ashton tried not to think about the possibility that Cal would tell him they couldn’t do this anymore. Ashton honestly didn’t know what he would do if Calum did. It caused his chest to tighten in a way that was uncomfortable, but a moment later he was distracted by Calum’s voice, commenting on how long his fingers were. Ash laughed and shrugged one shoulder. “I know it’s kinda weird. Good for you though...or so it seemed.” He wasn’t being arrogant, just commenting on observation because Calum had seemed really into getting fingered. Ashton really liked making him feel that good as well.   
  
It was on the tip of his tongue to ask the other boy about sex, about how he might feel if they had sex. Ashton wasn’t a virgin and he hadn’t been for awhile but he was pretty sure Calum was. He wasn’t sure if it as something Cal would tell him if it had happened despite the fact they were best friends. Ashton’s expression softened as he watched Cal kiss his knuckles and his chest tightened with for an entirely different reason than it had formerly. Gently, he gave Calum’s hand a squeeze before leaning over and kissing the other boy deeply, affectionately. Nothing terrified him more than losing Calum.   
  
Ashton broke the kiss and smiled faintly against Calum’s lips. “Go to sleep,” he said softly. He knew Calum had to be as tired as he was. Tomorrow they could worry about what they were going to do about Michael and Luke. For now he was content to stayed wrapped up with Calum and fall asleep next to him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been six weeks since Luke joined the band and the guys played their first gig in Annapolis as a four piece. Michael is struggling to accept that Luke has made 5SOS better while Luke struggles with his parents disapproval. When Michael extends an olive branch (sort of) it goes in a very different direction than he intended.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 3, guys! This is totally Muke focused so I hope you enjoy it! I love love love being able to do this with my gf since we're in a long distance relationship. It keeps us connected. :) Much love to her for her amazingness.  
> P.S. Michael has an "after school job" at Game Stop and the boys have been working towards saving money to buy a van. I don't remember if that was mentioned in previous parts but there you go!

**MICHAEL:**  The last month and a half had been...interesting. After their performance here at home, they’d spent the next several weeks hard at work to prepare for their show in Annapolis. The entire time Michael and Luke had been at each other’s throats, finding new ways to annoy one another and their bandmates. Michael had insisted more than once that this wasn’t going to work but Luke proved himself to be an asset to the band anyway, which only further pissed Michael off. By the time the show in Annapolis came around Michael was getting nervous because that was the make it or break it event. He promised Calum he would give it until then before it was decided whether Luke stayed in or got the boot. The show itself had gone off without a hitch and when they left that night, Michael knew Luke wasn’t going anywhere and he’d spent the entire trip back to Manasses with his head pressed against the backseat window and his earbuds in place so he didn’t have to talk to any of his bandmates. Michael realized that his fate was going to somehow intertwine with his arch nemesis and he was powerless to stop it.   
  
And since there was no point in trying to fight against it, Michael had defrosted somewhat when it came to their new bandmate. That didn’t mean he was warm and inviting by any stretch of the imagination because he wasn’t. But Michael realized that he was fighting a losing battle so it was best to just suck it up and deal. Practices became a little bit more peaceful and he didn’t go out of his way to agitate Luke. When Luke tried to annoy him he ignored it and eventually it stopped. Michael knew that Ashton and Calum were probably weary of his sudden change in behavior and when they asked him about it, Michael simply shrugged and told them it was best for the band like they had said. Whether they were convinced Michael wasn’t sure and he didn’t care enough to try and find out. Michael never thought he’d see the day that found him and Luke Hemmings working together as a cohesive unit toward the same goal. It was seriously something out of the Twilight Zone.   
  
Two weeks later and Michael got off of work late because he closed the store on Friday nights. Michael grabbed his backpack and turned off the lights of the store before exiting through the back door and waited for his manager to lock up. His manager offered him a ride home (they were still working really hard on getting that van) but Michael declined the offer. It was only a fifteen minute walk home and he had a shortcut through the woods between the next neighborhood over and his own. Michael said goodbye to his manager and headed out of the parking lot, holding tightly to the straps of the backpack over his shoulders. It was warm outside but there was at least a breeze that didn’t make it so bad as Michael made for the woods. He passed through the woodline and was grateful for the full moon which kept things relatively bright. It wasn’t a dense wooded area or anything and he didn’t need his phone to light the way.   
  
There was a clearing up ahead that was a halfway point with trails that led in different directions. The area was popular for four wheeling but instead of the sounds of ATV engines revving like during the day, a faint beat could be heard and as Michael got closer he could see headlights. The beat of the music was familiar, something he and the other boys listened to pretty regularly, and he knit his brow. Who the hell was hanging out in the woods in the middle of the night?   
  
Michael came into the clearing and blinked against the brightness of the headlights. When his vision adjusted and he realized who it was, a groan left him and he rolled his eyes. Of course it was Luke, sitting on the hood of his car, with a bottle of...something in his hand. It looked like a liquor bottle. “Are you kidding me?” he scoffed. Michael sure as hell hoped Luke wasn’t planning on drinking and driving.

 

 **LUKE:** Luke's parents hated 5 Seconds of Summer. He thought after their performance at Annapolis which got in the local papers, they'd see... something, but they didn't want to watch the performance or listen to the music. It just made them angrier. It made them angry that he put their name in the newspaper in connection with a band and not something worth a damn - not academics or sports or community service. When Luke insisted he had to dip out of a dinner to one of his grandfather's close friends because he had a performance on Friday night, there was a big fight. Luke had told them weeks in advance when he would busy and they still decided to schedule this stuff knowing he wouldn't be able to go. Or expecting Luke to blow off the band which he wasn't going to do. Since Annapolis, Luke felt that the band had some real traction and it was important to him. Luke remembered when his parents would bend over backwards to go to every football game of his brother's, but when it came to his music, they said nothing.

Nothing good, anyway. They told him that it was a waste of time, that he would never be famous, there were thousands of bands that sounded just like them who had a better shot at success. They didn't like the type of music he sang. They didn't like the people in his band. They told Luke the other boys were trash who weren't doing anything with their lives and dragging Luke down with them. They said he had no direction, no talent, that he'd be better off studying, that he wasn't as naturally smart as his brothers so he ought to be working harder instead of goofing off. Tonight his parents were in rare form, so Luke stole a bottle of his dad's whiskey and took off. Luke pulled off where he used to ATV in middle school, and he chose it because he knew none of his parents' friends would be here to see him. Nobody would see him at all. He got out of the car, unrolled the windows, and blared  _Catalyst_ , New Found Glory's fourth studio album and easily their best one, released in 2004. Luke sat on the hood, thumping his feet against the bumper, and drank until it didn't taste bad anymore. Fuck his whole fucking family. They didn't know anything about anything.

 _"Are you kidding me?"_  Luke's head jerked up at the sound of a voice. It took him a few bleary seconds to figure out who it was, and then he scoffed. "Get off my dick," Luke retorted, slurring the words slightly. He grinned as he said it, the irritation leaking out of his voice by the time he got to the word 'dick' and then he started to laugh. It was funny because Luke wanted Michael on his dick. He wanted to get with him so bad. Michael was so fucking cute and talented and smart and funny, and Luke liked him. He'd liked him for months but Luke didn't know what to do about it since Clifford hated him, or if he didn't hate him anymore, he still didn't like him. Luke tilted his head back, steadying himself on the hood with one hand, the other gripping the neck of the Jameson as he swallowed another mouthful of whiskey. This time it didn't even burn going down. Luke couldn't feel anything. It. Was. Awesome. Licking the excess off his lips, Luke decided to try to get off the car. He blinked down at the ground which seemed to be moving... which was sort of weird... because this wasn't Cali and there weren't hardly any earthquakes in Virginia because... uh Virginia sucked balls.

Luke slid off the hood of the car and he moved  _too fast, too fast!_  staggering a few feet before he was able to brace himself. Then he got confused about where the car was. Luke found it again, and then he remembered Michael was still here. "I've got... I've got shit to do so... so go away." He didn't even know what time it was but it was... it was taco time. "I want tacos...and a beer. And a Mellow Lellow, no, yellow. Lellow Yellow," he laughed because it was funny to say. He wanted one. Luke was going to Taco Bell. He just had to find his keys, and he stumbled to the driver's side door.

 

 **MICHAEL:** Michael rolled his eyes when Luke told him to get off his dick. “That’s classy of you,” he retorted. He guessed it was true when they said that money didn’t always buy class. Luke Hemmings, golden boy, was sitting in the middle of the woods getting completely hammered for some reason Michael had yet to figure out. Not that it was any of Michael's business why and he probably wasn’t going to ask. The last six weeks or so had been really weird. Not only had the two of them needed to get used to each other and learn how to work together, but they actually spoke sometimes without annoying one another. Michael hadn’t wanted to admit it at first (hell, he still didn’t sometimes) but Ashton and Calum had been right; Luke was an asset to the band. He was a great guitarist and he had a voice that Michael couldn’t even describe because it was just that good. More than once he’d had to stop himself from smiling like an idiot when they’d be in rehearsal and Luke would sing. Michael loved listening to him. The guy could sing anything and make it sound amazing. A small part of him was a little jealous because Luke’s voice was better than his own.

And yes, Luke was stupidly attractive but he always had been, which was something that hadn’t slipped under Michael’s radar. It was partially why Luke was popular because being so meant you had to look a certain way. Luke was tall, defined, with blue eyes that you could lose yourself in. Michael loved his eyes at the same time he hated them because of how they made him feel, both breathless and wanting. It was one of the most confusing experiences Michael had had in a long time. The last time he’d been this confused it was because he was figuring out he liked guys, period. It was also confusing because he and Luke had spent so much time disliking each other that it was hard to figure out how to mesh. They’d have to learn because Michael was beginning to think the same way Ashton and Calum did: they needed someone like Luke.

“Are you serious?” Michael asked, watching as Luke slid off the hood of the car and almost faceplant into the dirt. There was no way Luke was going to be able to drive, he was too wasted and he was either going to get stopped and arrested or kill someone. Michael moved quickly, crossing the space between them and cutting Luke off before he could reach the driver’s door. “There’s no fucking way you’re driving. You can’t even walk properly.” Regardless of their history and how they still might feel about each other, Michael wasn’t going to let him do this. “If you want to kill yourself then you can do it on someone else’s watch.” And he couldn’t let him risk killing someone else. Not that Michael expected this to be easy and Luke didn’t seem to be able to find his keys. So Michaelt grabbed him by the arm and attempted to direct him to the passenger side of the vehicle.

Leave it to Luke to make a fuss and struggle against him. Michael rolled his eyes as he bitched about being fine and that he wanted tacos. What he needed was to pass out some place. Michael contemplated taking Luke home but he knew the Hemmings were assholes, thheir whole vibe being rich dickheads. Michael frowned, realizing he was probably going to have to sneak Luke into his own house and sober him up. “God, will you stop wiggling. For fuck’s sake,” he cursed. When Luke didn’t stop, Michael growled in annoyance and shoved him up against the side of the car, Luke's chest to the window, and pinned him there. “Stop being a dick and let me find your keys.” His hand found the pockets of Luke’s skinny jeans, groping in them to find the keys first in the right and then the left.

 

 **LUKE:** Luke jerked back in surprise, swaying slightly, when Michael crossed in front of him, brow furrowing in confusion and irritation. How'd he move so fast? He was over there and now he was over here. When Michael accused him of not being able to walk, Luke huffed in drunken indignation. "Fuck you, I can do everything you can do." Like walk and play guitar and sing. "You're not better than me, Clifford." Even though Luke was sure he thought Michael was. And besides, it was his car and he could do whatever he wanted with it and who did Michael Clifford think he was? It wasn't like he could stop Luke from doing what he wanted to do. And what Luke wanted was tacos. He was so fucking hungry.

Michael said some other stuff about killing himself or someone else but Luke wasn't completely following it. He was still looking for his keys and that made him distracted - so did the fact that he was still holding the liquor bottle in his right hand so he was looking for the keys with his left hand. "Get off," he grumbled at Michael, digging his shoes into the dirt and trying to twist out of Michael's grasp. He wasn't wiggling! "Get offa me!" Michael shoved him up against the car instead and Luke dropped the liquor bottle with a yelp, then released a hiss of pain when his chin bumped the metal frame. "Fuck!" Breathing hard against the window, Luke's breath fogged up the glass in front of his mouth, and the fight went out of him around the same time Michael copped a feel of his ass through his right jean pocket. Pressing his forehead to the window, Luke shifted but not to get away, just to grind his ass up against the front of Michael's jeans.

"Find something you like?" he all but purred, and half grinned to himself. "Wanna put your hand down the front?" Pressed up against the car, Luke could still feel his cock start to harden in his jeans, and even though he didn't want to come all over his Lexus, Luke wouldn't mind letting Clifford get him off. God, he wanted Clifford to get him off. Fuck. But instead of touching him, Michael let him go and Luke guessed that was 'cause he found the keys. Luke shoved himself away from the car and turned around, steadying himself against it but facing Michael. "Wait," he protested, not wanting Clifford to start manhandling him again. He didn't like being shoved around.

Luke took an unsteady step forward and grabbed Michael by the collar of his shirt, staring down at him with glassy, dilated eyes. "You are so hot. Do you even know how hot you are?" Luke yanked the other boy closer, stumbling backwards, and kissed him.

And Luke didn't care what happened next because he was finally doing what he'd wanted to do for a really, really long time. He didn't know how long because he usually ignored... the part of him that thought Michael was hot, and liked his music and the way he didn't take any shit. The part of Luke that wanted Michael, on account of being so fucking jealous of him. And hating his guts. But Luke didn't really hate him at all.

 

 **MICHAEL:** Michael hadn’t meant to shove Luke so hard that he bumped his chin into the car and he was about to apologize until the guitarist starting wiggling around yet again. He didn’t realize exactly what Luke was trying to do, too distracted with attempting to find his keys. That smug tone as Luke asked if Michael found something he liked, then asked if he wanted to put his hands down the front of his pants made Michael grit his teeth. “Shut the fuck up.” Finally, his fingers closed around metal and he slipped the keys out of Luke’s pocket. “Ha. Found ‘em. Now get in the car. The passenger seat.” Michael tacked the last on because Luke was so stupid drunk he didn’t trust him to have common sense. Actually, Michael knew that was far out the window considering he’d tried to get behind the wheel. Luke turned around to lean against the car, facing him this time and told him to wait, so Michael did. He raised a brow in question, wondering what the hell he was waiting for when Luke stepped forward and grabbed him by the collar. Slurred words came from his bandmate, telling Michael how hot he was and he rolled his eyes. “Everyone’s hot when you’re drunk,” he muttered. He wasn’t going to take this as a compliment from Luke, who had never been attracted to a guy in his life.

“Hey what are you-” Michael attempted to protest as he was pulled forward, but he was cut off when Luke’s mouth pressed roughly to his own. It wasn’t a great kiss. It was off center and tasted like whiskey (which Michael had never liked the taste of) and he had to press his hands to the car on either side of Luke to keep them both from falling over. Michael was so shocked that he didn’t break it right away and when logic kicked in, he broke it and gasped for breath. Adrenaline shot through him, making him pant softly and he was both confused and angry. Who the fuck did Luke Hemmings think he was. “I ought to leave you here after that.” The words were a growl through gritted teeth. “Get in the car.” Each word was pronounced firmly. Michael took hold of the front of Luke’s shirt and dragged him off the car before unlocking the door. The Lexus (of course it was something so expensive) was a keyless entry deal so he didn’t need to push a button since the locks popped open once he touched the handle, and Michael shoved Luke into the car, made sure all of his lanky ass was in the passenger seat, before closing the door and walking around to the other side.

Anger and confusion coursed through Michael as he yanked open the driver’s side door and tossed his backpack into the backseat. He got into the car, which was very new and very technological, and turned down the radio so he could concentrate. Michael had his license but he didn’t have a car yet. His parents couldn’t afford to get him one and Michael was more concerned about the van the band needed rather than a car for his personal use. So he sucked it up and walked everywhere or rode a bike. It didn’t bother him. Ashton and Calum didn’t have cars either. Michael adjusted the seat so he could drive properly and once he thought it was right, he drove out of the woods and into the street. It wasn’t far from his house and his hands gripped the steering wheel tightly out of annoyance, his jaw set. For a long moment he didn’t say anything.

“You’re a real bag of dicks, you know?” Michael finally barked. “Do you think you can just go around doing the shit you do without consequence? Say you got in the car and killed someone else.” Michael made a derisive sound in the back of his throat. “Guess it wouldn't matter. Not like your rich ass parents would let you do any jail time.” That wasn’t the real reason he was angry though it was a good cover. What Michael was really angry about was the fact Luke had attempted to kiss him because he was drunk, he was angry at himself because if Luke had been sober, he would have let him. Michael was pissed at his own feelings and how fucking confusing they were. God, he wanted to blame Ashton and Calum for this but it wasn’t their fault. “And you can’t just fucking go around kissing people because you want to or because you're hot or something. Ever hear of this thing called consent? Yeah, you should probably get it before you pull a stunt like that again or before you find yourself bitch slapped with a sexual assault charge.” Not that he would ever go to the police about Luke trying to kiss him, because it wasn't that serious.

With nothing else to bitch about, Michael fell silent as they continued to drive, at least until Luke opened the door to lean out of the car and puke and he groaned in annoyance. This was not how Michael wanted to spend his night.

When they finally pulled into his driveway, the lights in Michael's house were all off and only the ones on either side of the garage were illuminated. Madison was at a friend’s house for the night and his parents would have already gone to ned. He put the car in park and got out, forgetting all about his backpack, and went around to the other side to open the door. “Alright, let’s go. Try and be quiet so we don’t wake my parents up.” Taking hold of Luke, Michael practically dragged him out of the seat and once Luke was standing long enough, Michael wrapped an arm around his slim waist to keep him up right. “If you puke on me I swear to God, I’ll kill you.” With that warning on the table, Michael dragged Luke into his house and toward the stairs. So far they hadn’t been overly noisy but going up the stairs was going to be interesting. They only made it halfway up before Luke lost his balance, knocking both of them against the wall. “Ow, fuck. Be careful,” Michael hissed.

It felt like ages before they finally made it to his bedroom (they had to pass his parents room first and thank god Luke hadn’t spoken) and Michael kicked the door shut. He helped Luke over to his bed and deposited him onto it. “Stay there.” Michael ducked out of the room and when he returned it was with a bottle of water (room temperature so he didn’t further agitate Luke’s stomach), a mop bucket in case he puked again, a towel and a wet washcloth. The room was dimly lit from a lamp he’d left on before he went to work and Michael approached Luke and forced him to sit up. “Come here.” Using the wet folded washcloth that was still warm from the water, he pressed it to Luke’s head and face to wipe off the sweat. Michael realized Luke had puked on his shirt too and sighed. “Clothes off. I’ll wash them before I go to sleep.” Michael stood and tugged at the hem of Luke’s shirt to pull it up and over his head.

 

 **LUKE:** Luke complained about getting shoved in the passenger's seat of his own car but once it started moving, he got a stomachache so he didn't say anything else. He leaned back against the headrest and cracked open one eye when Michael accused him of being a bag of dicks. He brought up that thing about Luke killing somebody and Luke scowled in response - not so much for the hit-and-run part, but for the shit he said about his parents. And then Michael got mad about the kiss but Luke only half-followed that because he was feeling dizzy, sweaty, and sick. He threw up and his head exploded, mouth bitter and sticky and sour. Luke didn't even know where he was and he leaned heavily on Michael to get inside without tripping or throwing up again. His throat was burning. His tongue felt slimy. It was gross.

Michael brought him to a room and he sat down on the bed, and he was to to stay which made Luke groaned, bending over to brace his forearms on his knees, head hanging between them. He didn't want to sit up but Michael made him, and then he pressed something to his head, and his face, and it felt good. It was warm-but-not-too-warm and Luke shivered, sucking his bottom lip between his teeth. _"Clothes off."_ Luke didn't bother to argue, raising his arms when Michael pulled his shirt off. Then he fumbled with the zipper and button on his pants, and it took a long time to get those off. Then he tried to pull off his boxers but Michael told him not to. So instead Luke reached for the water bottle, swished and swallowed a mouthful of it to get the bad taste out of his mouth, and when he leaned over to put it back on the side table, he didn't get up again.

Luke's elbow gave way under him and he rolled onto the bed, stomach first. For close to five minutes, he was in and out, his head throbbing against the pillow. "I got in a fight," he said abruptly, swallowing thickly, his voice scratchy and low, "With my parents. They're ashamed of me. Because of the music. They hate it. They hate everything I like." Maybe hate wasn't the right word because they didn't think music was important enough to warrant a really strong word like 'hate', but they didn't approve of it. Of anything Luke did. "They keep telling me how we're never gonna make it, it's... it's bullshit. They've never even heard us play." They'd never come to a single performance of anything Luke had ever done, with either band, and it sucked. "They don't think I'm good enough." Good enough to be a Hemmings, good enough to make it as a musician, both? Luke wished he didn't care what they thought. "You think I'm good enough, right?"

Luke didn't know why he asked. If he was sober, he wouldn't have asked. He would have said they wouldn't have let him in the band if he wasn't good enough. "Even though you hate me," that wasn't right, "We hate each other." Lie. Luke rubbed his cheek against the soft texture of the sheet, vision blurred. "I don't hate you. I didn't hate you before I was just... jealous. I'm always jealous of you." For a lot of reasons. Michael was the better guitarist, Michael was smarter, Michael had a better band, Michael was... Michael. Michael didn't care that Luke was rich, or had a nice car, or dated Amber Zales, part-time (local) model and super fucking hot cheerleader. Luke shouldn't have felt like he was competing with somebody who had none of those things but he was, all the time, and it drove him crazy that Michael never seemed impressed with or intimidated by any of it.

 

 **MICHAEL:** Luke had taken Michael telling him to take his clothes off almost too seriously, so when he attempted to shed his boxers, Michael stopped him and turned his face away. Michael hated the fact that he could feel heat creep up into his face. Alright, so admittedly he was a little curious as to what Luke might look like naked but he would never admit such a thing. Michael took Luke’s clothes and left the room so he could take them to the laundry room, toss them into the washing machine and start it. On his way back to the room, Michael grabbed a couple extra blankets from the linen closet, since was taking the floor tonight. When he returned to the room, Luke was on his stomach on the bed and Michael sighed softly. He really hoped the guy didn’t puke on his bed throughout the night. Michael spread the blankets out on the floor and grabbed an extra pillow from his bed before sprawling out on the nest he'd created. He put the pillow behind his head and stared up at the ceiling, fingers of one hand drumming out a familiar rhythm against his chest.

Luke spoke then, telling Michael that he’d gotten into a fight with his parents and why. Luke explained that his parents hated the band and didn’t think they’d go anywhere. They hated everything Luke did and Michael honestly wasn’t surprised. He’d grown up his whole life in this town and he knew how families like the Hemmings operated. The Hemmings had two older golden children, Ben and Jack, both of which were everything their parents wanted them to be; popular, top of his class, off to some ivy league college to become a white collar something or other. Then there was the third born who was probably ignored most of his life and forever in the shadow of his older siblings. From the way Luke was talking it sounded like he wasn’t living up to the expectations his parents had set for him. Michael knit his brow because he was annoyed at the empathy that had crept into his heart. Even if all of that was true and Luke’s parents kind of sucked did he really have such a right to complain? He was still well off, still popular, and still had opportunities that most of them didn’t. Luke would never know the struggles of middle-class living or what it was like to get behind on bills. He’d never know what it was like to watch his mom cry because she couldn’t afford to provide everything her kids wanted.

And he didn’t have parents like Ashton’s, who were so stuck in their backwards way of thinking that they were abusive as hell to their kids. Most of the time it wasn’t physically but Michael always knew when Ashton had a bad incident with his parents because Ashton’s whole demeanor changed. Luke was the epitome of a privileged white boy and he’d never have to deal with being looked at like a lesser person like Calum, who was from New Zealand and half-Maori and got taunted for being Asian when he wasn’t. The whole town was mostly rich white people and Luke was one of them. Yet Michael didn’t feel like he should downplay the problems Luke was having either so he bit down on his lower lip. It wasn’t going to help to tell Luke to quit whining because he had nothing to whine about. That wasn’t entirely true and Michael was assuming a lot about him. People tended to be at their most honest when they were drunk.

Luke asked if he was good enough and Michael nodded. “Yeah, Luke...I think you’re good enough.” He was being completely honest about that. Michael had been so hellbent against Luke being part of the band and he’d been proven wrong. Annapolis had proven just how much they needed him. Then Luke said something that truly shocked him and Michael’s eyes cut to the direction of the other guitarist. He couldn’t see him over the edge of the bed but that was fine. It was probably a good thing they couldn’t see each other. Luke Hemmings was jealous of him? There was no way. This was just drunken babbling. “What the hell do you have to be jealous about?” Michael asked before he could stop himself. “You have literally everything you could possibly desire and you’re jealous of me?” He scoffed, not believing a word of that.

A sigh left him and Michael sat up so he could see Luke, his turned toward him on the mattress. “I don’t hate you, Luke. Okay...maybe I did for a long time but it’s because you’ve gone out of your way to make me hate you. You pick on me about everything. You let your friends bully me and now you’re saying it’s because you’re jealous? Doesn’t make sense.” Michael had spent most of his school career hating Luke and his circle of minions. People whom Luke had been spending less and less time with. Maybe Luke didn’t like them as much as he tried to make it seem. They all sucked.

 

 **LUKE:** Luke _was_ jealous, but it was hard to argue when it hurt to blink, or breathe deep, or move at all. He didn't think he'd ever been this wasted. So at first he didn't say anything, he just stared down at Michael. Michael said he didn't hate him - not now anyway, but he used to. He used to and it was Luke's fault because he bullied him, made fun of him, and laughed when his friends were jerks to Michael who... a lot of people thought was kind of weird. Easy to mess with, but usually only when he was by himself, not with the other boys. Especially Ashton. Luke thought Ashton was cool and so did his friends, though they didn't get why someone like Ashton would hang around Michael.

"There's a lot of stuff that makes me jealous," Luke mumbled finally, "You're really good on the guitar, better than me. I know you write stuff too," Luke had never written his own music before, he wasn't sure if he'd be any good at it, "You have better friends." Ashton was his friend too, and Cal, but they were Michael's friends first. The three of them started the band together. "You're really smart." It used to annoy him to be stuck in the same classes as Michael. Everything about Michael annoyed him. "And I like you. Like you," he emphasized. It definitely wasn't a friend way to think about somebody, and it sucked because Michael was right that Luke had a lot of stuff. But he didn't have all the stuff he wanted, not yet anyway. Luke didn't have his own place far from his parents, and his band wasn't on the radio yet, and Michael Clifford didn't like him. That was what he wanted.

Luke was sleepy all of a sudden and he closed his eyes for a long moment. He almost forgot what he was going say, and when he did speak again his voice was muffled, his face turned towards the pillow. "I don't just think you're hot 'cause I'm drunk." That wasn't true, what Michael had said to him before Luke tried to kiss him. He'd heard that Michael liked guys, but he'd never talked him about it. He'd mostly heard it from other people, and he never paid much attention to who Michael was dating or why (or if he was dating anyone? No one that Luke knew, that was for sure). Luke had known he wasn't straight since eighth grade, maybe seventh, but he didn't kiss his first boy until freshman year. And he'd been with a few guys since then, but it was on the DL. For a lot of reasons. Because this was Manassas. Because his family was already on the verge of blowing a gasket about his band. Shit like that.

"I think...you're always hot,"he yawned mid-sentence, trailing off in the middle briefly because he forgot what he wanted to say. "I'm sleepy," he blurted out drowsily, fighting to keep his eyes open because he still had more stuff to say. What was he going say? "'M glad you don't hate me anymore." Luke planned to say some other stuff, but Michael wanted him to go to sleep so Luke did as well.

 

 **MICHAEL:** Michael frowned as Luke went about listing his qualities, speech muffled and slurred still and when he got to the part where he told Michael he ‘like liked’ him, he’d heard enough. It didn’t matter how much Luke told him it wasn’t because he was drunk because Michael wouldn’t believe him. Sure, people were honest when they were drunk but they could also say stupid things. More than likely Luke wouldn’t remember any of this in the morning and the two of them could go on about business as usual. Luke reiterated a second time he thought Michael was hot and that caused him to roll his eyes. In all the years they’d known each other Michael had never once seen Luke even hint that he was attracted to boys. Guys like Luke didn’t like guys and especially not guys like Michael. Even if he were telling the truth, Luke still had a girlfriend that everyone knew about. A girlfriend that was an idiot but popular people didn’t date each other for brains. Michael told Luke to go to sleep and let out a relieved breath when he stopped talking and his breathing evened out, indicating he’d fallen asleep.

Michael lay awake for a long time that night, partially because he had a lot on his mind and partially because he wanted to get Luke’s clothes into the dryer. When he finally fell asleep it was nearly four in the morning and he woke  because his mom came banging on his door at eight with the clothes from the dryer, asking who they belonged to. Michael groaned, heat flooding his face and causing him to blush when his mother asked him why Luke Hemmings was almost naked in his bed. His parents had always been the non-invasive type; they never read the notes they’d found in their kids’ pockets or read journals or diaries. They’d never monitored their internet activity unless they felt like their kids were involved in something dangerous or inappropriate. And yes, Michael had been caught looking at a porn site before but he’d been 13 and curious. (They’d had a long talk about that and he’d been grounded for two weeks. Michael hadn’t done such a thing again.) So he explained to his mom that Luke had gotten too drunk to drive home and that his parents would kill him if he’d come home that way so he’d brought him here to sleep it off. Michael made his mom promise not to call the Hemmings about this because he was taking care of it and though she wasn’t happy about it, she agreed. She left his room but not before warning him not to get too involved emotionally with Luke because he’d spent too much time hurting Michael in the past. He nodded and said he could handle it before closing the door. Michael left Luke’s clothes on the foot of the bed and went downstairs to find food.

It was a couple of hours later when Luke finally came out of his room. Michael’s parents were out for the day at some company event that was an all day thing and Madison had yet to come home from her friend’s house. He called for Luke to come into the kitchen and when the other boy did, Michael grinned. “You look like shit.” Truly, he did. Michael had never seen Luke look anything but perfect before so this was a little satisfying if he were being honest. “Here. Take this before you leave.” Michael slipped off the stool at the breakfast bar of the kitchen and dug through a drawer where his mom kept ibuprofen and tossed the bottle to Luke, then he got him a bottle of water. “You should get some food in you. Something easy like toast. I can make you some. It’ll ease your stomach a bit.” Michael shifted his weight from one foot to the other, feeling a little awkward and when he spoke again he didn’t know why. “My dad went through a time when he drank a lot. My mom was working the night shift at the hospital and worked a lot of over time because he was laid off. We had a lot of problems with money and he drank a lot to deal with it. I used to try and ease the hangovers for him the next morning before school.” Mihcael shrugged. Luke had shared a little bit about his parents and for some reason he felt compelled to do the same. “He’s good now. Been sober for six years and got a better job but he still goes to AA when things get tough.” He was fidgeting with the end of his shirt and fell silent, not sure what else to say. Luke didn’t look like he really wanted to talk about anything and that was fine. Maybe he didn’t remember all the shit he’d said and that was for the best.

A few minutes later, Luke left and Michael worried at the inside of his cheek with his teeth as he watched his bandmate drive away. The backpack he’d left in the car wasn’t even a thought as he closed the door. Michael pressed his back to the door and blew out a breath. He felt different, like something fundamental had shifted between him and Luke but he couldn’t figure out what it was. He decided not to think about it and went up to his room to pick it up and change the sheets on his bed (they smelled like whiskey). Then Michael got on his computer so he could work on recording some new stuff to show the guys later.

It was nearly three in the afternoon when the doorbell rang and Michael groaned, annoyed to have been interrupted when he was in the groove. He assumed it was Madison because she’d forgotten her house key. She did that often. Setting the guitar aside, Michael left his room and traipsed down the stairs and to the front door. He’d showered and changed earlier though he’d changed out pajama pants for basketball shorts and a loose t-shirt since he had no plans except to bum around his house and it was perfectly acceptable to answer the door in. “One day you’re going to forget your key and -- oh.” Michael stopped short telling his sister off as he opened the door to find Luke standing there, looking like an absolutely wet dream yet again. Fuck, that was annoying. “You forget something?” he asked, raising a brow.

 

 **LUKE:** Luke never knew that stuff about Michael's dad, which wasn't surprising because he'd never bothered to ask Michael anything about his life. It wasn't like they were friends. Luke went home and his parents were gone which saved him the third degree about why he was out all night; he passed out in his room for the rest of the morning. Then he took a shower, changed his clothes (even those his were clean from last night - thanks to Michael, who'd actually stayed up to wash them for him so he could wear them home), and ate three bowls of Mini Wheats in the kitchen. Luke checked his pockets for his cell phone and couldn't find it so he went out to the car to check; the phone was in the floorboard of the passenger's side, and there was a bag in the backseat. It wasn't his. Had to be Michael's. He must've left it there before he drove them both back to his house. A lot of last night was fuzzy, but Luke remembered some of what he'd said and done. Luke remembered trying to kiss the other guy, remembered admitting he was jealous of him, and that he liked him. Shit.

So even though he wasn't sure he wanted to see his bandmate again so soon after what had to be the single most embarrassing fucking moment of his life, Luke felt like he owed Michael a real apology. And he had to give Mihcael his backpack. So he drove over to the Cliffords' house and knocked on the door, which Michael answered. Good. Better him than his parents. _"You forget something?"_ "No," nothing but his self-respect, "But you did. I found this in the backseat of the car." Luke held up the backpack by one of the shoulder straps and handed it back to Michael. "I also... I wanted to thank you for last night," he glanced away from Michael, feeling embarrassed, "For not letting me drive, and not telling my parents, and washing my clothes... that was... you didn't have to do any of that." And Luke hated that he'd thrown up in front of Michael and then rambled like an idiot. "My parents would've grounded me forever." If he'd made it home that drunk. They would've been furious. He didn't need to give them more to criticize.

Luke could have let it go there, and it would've been okay. He did owe Michael a lot, and he was grateful, but there was a lot of other shit he did and said, and Luke wasn't sure how to make that right. He also wasn't sure how much he'd forgotten about last night. Everything that happened before he saw Michael was a blank. "I'm sorry about last night." Luke was sorry about so much of the shit he did last night, and for being such an asshole when Michael was just trying to help him (and to keep him from killing himself or somebody else).

"I shouldn't have kissed you like that," he admitted. "And I don't want things to be weird between us. I get why you don't like me the way I like you." Luke smiled slightly at Michael. He'd never felt this unsure about himself, and he kind of hated it. Michael always made him feel that way. It was hard for Luke to admit that someone he liked didn't want him back, but rejection happened. Usually it happened to other people but whatever. Considering all the crap Luke and his friends had done to Michael over the years, Luke couldn't expect him to do much more than tolerate him - and that was cool. He loved the band. He loved performing with the other guys. Luke loved the original music. 5 Seconds of Summer was the best thing he'd been a part of in a really long time and he didn't want to fuck up.

 

 **MICHAEL:** Luke held up his backpack that he’d forgotten all about last night. There was nothing overly important in it. Just a hoodie and a few odds and ends but Michael was grateful to have it back and he took it from Luke. Michael expected that was all that was going to be and that Luke would leave now that he’d handed over the backpack but he didn’t leave and when he thanked Michael, the guitarist blinked in surprise. He didn’t remember a day in his life that Luke ever thanked anyone for anything and yet here he was, standing on Michael's front porch and expressing gratitude for not letting him act the fool. Michael shook his head, geared up to tell him it was no big deal and that he didn’t have to thank him for being a decent human being. Luke prattled on instead, and apologized about his behavior as well. Again, something Michael had never heard from the other boy. Luke wasn’t in the business of taking personal responsibility for things and Michael was wondering where this was coming from and why? Luke didn’t have to apologize or thank him for anything and Michael had certainly not expected it. What he had expected was not to see Luke until their next band rehearsal and they wouldn’t talk about last night. Luke would either forget about everything that had happened or he would pretend he’d forgotten. Either way, Michael probably would have been fine because acknowledging everything just made things more complicated.

Then Luke apologized for kissing him and Michael shifted uncomfortably. Yes, last night he’d been pretty pissed off over Luke kissing him while he was drunk. Michael wondered if he would have been so mad if Luke had been sober. Maybe. He didn’t know. The idea of kissing Luke was one of those things that was pointless to think about because they disliked each other. Or so he’d thought up until a couple weeks ago. There were plenty of people they went to school with who fantasized about being Luke Hemmings girlfriend or boyfriend but Michael had never considered himself one of them. Hell, even Madison was smitten with him and Michael had caught her doodling his name with little hearts in her notebook. He’d promptly set it on fire which got him the third degree from his parents but he wasn’t sorry. That was his sister and it annoyed him to know she’d throw him under the bus for a chance to get attention from Luke. Now it felt like all of that was changing and he loosed a breath before stepping back. “Want to come in?”

Michael set his backpack down by the door and when Luke came inside, he shut the door behind them and bit down on his lower lip. He wasn’t sure what to do or say at first and fidgeted with the hem of his shirt. The kitchen. Yeah. That was a nice neutral place to chat without having to overthink anything and he led Luke in that direction. Once they were there, Michael leaned against the counter and shoved a hand through his hair, nervousness welling in his belly. Except for last night, this was the only time he’d ever actually been alone with Luke and it was weird. Weird and sort of okay. Michael was getting really agitated with the confusion he felt around Luke. “Look, don’t apologize for anything else. Shit happens and you were wasted.” Michael crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged. “I don’t hate you or anything like that. Not anymore at least. You’re an asset to the band. You’re a great guitarist and you’ve got a killer voice but…” Michael trailed off, eyes averting to the floor for a moment as his brow knit.

“I don’t understand. You claim you like me now but that doesn’t make any sense. People don’t just...change their feelings about someone. If you liked me then why have you treated me like I’m below you?” Michael understood to an extent. They were on vastly opposite ends of the social spectrum. A lot of people thought he was weird because of his choice of style, dyed hair, and general anti social behavior. Michael had never needed a lot of friends or people to validate him. Not like Luke did. Yet now Luke was telling him he liked him when he’d always been the ring leader of every encounter Michael had had with his squad. “Kinda hard to believe you when you’ve never said shit as I was getting shoved into lockers by your pals.” And even if they were friends, was Luke going to stand up for him when that shit happened again and risk his reputation? Michael didn’t think so.

 

 **LUKE:** Michael invited him in and Luke nodded, stepping over the threshold and following him into the kitchen. He didn't remember anything about the floorplan of this house: last night it had been dark and he was wasted, and this morning he was hungover. Michael told him not to apologize anymore which was good because Luke wasn't great at those, and he wanted to forget last night ever happened (most of it anyway). His bandmate reiterated that he didn't hate him - which was good, maybe not deserved - that he had a great voice and he played well; those were things Luke already knew, but he liked hearing it from Michael the most. Luke smiled at Michael, pleased.

There was a trace of the usual smugness, although Luke wasn't trying to be a dick. "I didn't think I'd ever hear you say out loud that you like having me in the band." Luke read between the lines for what he wanted to hear the most - yeah, he was asset but he wanted Michael to want him around. Michael had trailed off, and then he admitted that he didn't understand how Luke could like him and still treat him like shit, still let his friends get away with things like shoving him into lockers. Luke's smile faded and he leaned against the kitchen counter, trying to work out what the right thing to say was. Not another apology. Something better. "I don't think I figured out... how I felt about you until we started playing together." Especially once they stopped arguing so much. "You're really fucking amazing, and sharing a stage with you, it's... the best feeling in the world."

Luke really loved their band, and the more time they spent together, practicing or hanging out because they were practicing, the more he wanted to close the gap between him and Michael, without their friends there to buffer it. Luke straightened and walked over to the other boy. "I'm sorry for what me and my friends did to you. I'm sorry I'm such an asshole. I can't promise it won't happen again," him getting bullied, "But I can promise it won't be because of me. I'll tell them to knock it off." If he made Michael Clifford a target then he should be able to say he was off limits, right? "I don't give a shit about that school, or those people." They only hung out with him because of his family. "I care about our band. I care about getting the fuck out of this town with you, and Ashton, and Calum." Now that Luke had found something that he cared about, that he wanted to sink all his time and energy into, he couldn't give less of a flying fuck what anybody thought (except for his parents and only because they were still paying his cell phone and car bills).

"I'm not saying you should take my word for it, but I promise things'll be different." Michael was just going to have to wait and see - which was the best Luke could offer right now. Well, no, that wasn't exactly true. Luke reached for Michael tentatively, half expecting his hand to get slapped away, and combed his fingers through the other boy's hair. "What I really want to know is... if you've got a problem with me kissing you, period, or me kissing you when I'm wasted." He just wanted to know if he was wasting his time or not - it wouldn't change anything else, he meant what he said about the band. "I'm a lot better at it when I'm sober."

 

 **MICHAEL:**  Luke was apologizing again even after Michael had told him not to and he didn’t stop him. If he was being honest, it was satisfying to hear something like that because Michael didn’t think Luke had spent a whole lot of time apologizing to anyone. So Michael was going to revel in it, soak it up while it lasted, and probably hold it over Luke's head later on when he needed to. Actually, he was going to hold the whole previous night over Luke’s head. Michael didn’t realize he was grinning faintly to himself because of his own thoughts. It faded when Luke brought up telling his friends to back off of him. That wasn’t going to seem suspicious at all. Not that his friends probably weren’t confused as to why Luke had joined the band in the first place. It wasn’t like it was a secret. They had played together at the reenactment festival and all Luke’s friends had witnessed it. Over the past six weeks nothing had really changed though Michael hadn’t gotten shoved into lockers or anything. Probably because they were mostly bored of it. It had been a bigger thing their freshman and sophomore years. “They’re going to wonder why you’ve had some weird change of heart,” he pointed out.

Michael wasn’t looking at Luke when he claimed not to care about those people and that he cared about the band and making it out of Virginia. A faint smile lit over Michael’s features but he hoped Luke hadn’t noticed it. Michael cared about those things as well. He loved his family and he would be sad to leave them behind but he had dreams. Big ones. Just like Ashton and Calum, and apparently Luke. The four of them wanted the same thing and together they could make it happen. Michael knew that now even though it had been a hard pill to swallow. The three of them had been good but with Luke they were great. He was really starting to believe they had a real shot at making it to the big leagues now that Luke had joined them. Michael looked up at Luke and smiled faintly. “Looks like we agree on something for the first time. I never thought I’d see the day…” Surely no one would have ever seen the day that Michael Clifford and Luke Hemmings would agree to anything. It was both strange and a relief at the same time. Michael didn’t know what to make of it.

And he didn’t have time to worry about it because Luke had stepped forward, closing the space between them. Michael’s breath hitched as Luke raised a hand and moved his fingers through his hair. It was such an intimate way to touch another person, especially one you had previously claimed to despise, and Michael felt his heart begin to race. Luke asked him if he’d have a problem with being kissed by him period or if it was just when he was wasted, then he promised he was better at it when he was sober. Michael’s knees felt like jello and when he released the breath he’d been holding it was shaky. “I...I don’t know…” he admitted. It wasn’t like he’d ever experienced what kissing Lukewould be like while he was sober.

Suddenly, Michael felt like he was standing on the edge of a cliff and he could either step back and remain safe or take the plunge and hope he made it out alive. Kissing Luke, admitting being attracted to him, felt like such a slippery slope and Michael was not someone that often took chances. He especially didn’t take chances on people because they never failed to disappoint. Michael had always been the type of person that believed if you didn’t set expectations for people in place then you were never let down. The exceptions to the rule had always been Ashton and Calum. This version of Luke that he didn’t know - the version who actually had compassion and desires like all of them - was a stranger to him. Now Michael just needed to decide if he wanted to take a risk and get to know him, to put his heart on his sleeve and hope Luke didn’t break it.

“Fuck it,” Michael breathed just before curling his fingers into the front of Luke’s shirt and pulling him forward, their mouths meeting in an eager kiss.

 

 **LUKE:** Michael pointed out that his friends would be surprised at his change of heart, and Luke shrugged in response. "What can I say? I'm an enigma." He'd worry about it when and if it came up, and most of the time people didn't question what Luke did even if they didn't understand why he did it. The exception: his parents, of course, but when it came to the band, for example, he knew not everyone got it. But hardly anyone said anything to his face about it, and Luke told the ones that did to listen to their music - because they were fucking amazing. Luke wasn't worried about what people would say. He thought he could handle it. "Besides, people like to be surprised. Keeps things from getting boring." And Luke prided himself on being anything but boring. He meant what he said about the band, too, and about leaving Manassas, and he thought he saw Michael smile - but it was hard to tell when Michael wasn't looking at him.

Finally Michael admitted that they agreed on something which was one of those apocalyptic signs - since they never agreed on anything. Luke laughed in response. "Yeah. It's a red letter day," he replied lightly. He was interested in knowing where they stood, not as bandmates or as uneasy friends, but as something else. And Michael didn't shut him down. He didn't seem sure of himself - or Luke - either, not at first.

 _"Fuck it."_ Luke's eyes widened in surprise when Michael yanked the front of his shirt to pull him in, but he grinned into the kiss. There was a particular moment that came right before a really good first kiss, like the eye of a storm, and he felt it. Luke grabbed the back of Michael's neck to tug him closer. Michael's lips were soft as Luke parted them slightly and sucked on Michael's lower lip, before biting it for good measure, Luke's sterling silver piercing caught between them. Luke slipped his tongue between Michael's lips and tightened his hold on him, cupping his head in both hands now and deepening the kiss. Luke backed Michael into a corner of the kitchen, pressing him up against the counter. Easing one hand from the nape of Michael's neck into his hair, Luke slipped the other around the small of Michael's back, urging him closer until they were pressed chest to chest, thigh to thigh.

Luke broke the kiss briefly, sucking down a mouthful of air, and he murmured against Michael's mouth. "Better, right? Really... really good." He wasn't talking about himself so much as the kiss, gaze flicking down from Michael's eyes to his lips. Luke kissed him again, sliding his fingers along the warmth of his bandmate's back to his hips, grabbing at his ass with both hands and dragging their hips together, rocking against Michael just enough that the beginnings of his erection rubbed over the crotch of Michael's shorts.

 

 **MICHAEL:** Even though Michael had been anticipating the kiss - had made the decision to initiate it - he hadn’t been expecting what came from it. The moment their lips touched he felt like something exploded inside of his chest, sending sparks of adrenaline throughout his entire body, skittering through his veins and into the pit of his stomach. And when Luke bit down on his lower lip, fingers playing in his hair, that rush moved between his legs and brought a moan from Michael. He could feel the piercing against his lips as he opened his mouth for Luke’s tongue, accepting the kiss and returning it with just as much need. Michael’s hand didn’t stay fisted in Luke’s shirt, instead slipping around his waist along with the other and splaying across the center of Luke's back. Blunt nails dug into the material of the shirt and he gasped softly when he was suddenly pushed back against the kitchen counter. Six weeks ago he would have found it hysterical if someone told him he’d be hooking up with his nemesis. Now all he wanted to do was touch and kiss every inch of Luke.

Michael let out a sound of protest when Luke broke the kiss even though he was grateful for being able to breathe. Michael nodded at his words, distracted by the way Luke’s lips were swollen from kissing and the way his eyes were dilated. Luke kissed him again and Michael groaned into it, almost laughing when hands grabbed at his ass to pull him forward. Between the fabric of their pants, he could feel Luke getting hard and it sent a thrill through Michael that he never expected. Michael broke the kiss once more and grinned at Luke before giving him a playful nudge backwards. Michael reached behind his head and grabbed hold of his shirt so he could pull it off, and when it was gone, he grabbed at Luke’s shirt as well and pulled it up and over his head with his help. “Commit to it,” he demanded softly. Michael’s hands moved up along Luke’s sides and he leaned into him so the tip of his tongue could lick at Luke's lip piercing. Then he took it between his lips so he could suck at it playfully.

None of the past mattered at the moment because what he wanted right now was for Luke to get him off right here in his kitchen. Michael’s hands slipped around Luke’s back, fingertips moving along the smooth skin. It was probably a more intimate touch than he should have allowed but Michael’s curiosity had been piqued. He was only imagining what Luke’s skin tasted like and if this continued to go so well he might get the opportunity to find out for real. Michael wasn’t thinking about the plethora of reasons this was a bad idea: they were bandmates, Luke had a girlfriend, it could cause tension between the band, they could end up regretting anything that happened. No, he wasn’t thinking about any of that. It was one of those rare moments when Michael tossed all logical thinking out of the window and just let his body take over, giving into something he hadn’t realized he wanted so badly.

The kiss was broken once more but Michael's lips didn’t stray from Luke’s skin. Michael’s teeth grazed along the edge of his bandmate’s jaw and then down the side of his neck. Fingertips slid down over Luke's belly, mapping the muscle beneath the skin, and when he reached the belt buckle, Michael tugged it open. A smiled against Luke’s neck and though he knew he shouldn’t say what he was about to, he did anyway. “Bet your friends would be shocked to find out you let me blow you...or I let you blow me.” Not that Michael ever intended for anyone to find out. Ever.

 

 **LUKE:** Luke grinned against Michael's lips at the needy sound of protest which slipped out of his throat; he wanted to hear a lot more than that, and Michael groaned for him when they kissed again. Luke copped a feel of Michael's ass, cupping it in his hands as he pulled his bandmate against him. When Michael broke the kiss again, Luke snapped at his lip in a playful, wordless protest of his own. He watched Michael pull off his shirt, slack jawed at the sight of smooth pale skin. Michael didn't give him much time to enjoy it, pulling up his own shirt insistently; Luke obliged, raising his arms, and smirked at the demand. His hands slid over Michael's bare shoulders, nails digging in briefly at the tug of his lip ring. Luke shuddered, moaning into the kiss. Fuck, that felt so good.

His hands slid over Michael's shoulderblades before slipping up into his hair as they kissed, and this time when Michael broke it, he didn't shrug. Teeth grazed along the edge of his jaw and neck, and Luke groaned, eyes sliding closed. He tilted his head back and enjoyed it for a few long seconds, the soft brush of fingertips against his belly down to the waistband of his jeans. He felt Michael smile into his skin and blinked at the mention of his friends - and the prospect of getting blown by Michael (or blowing him). Luke took advantage of his position to pull his bandmate's hair, tugging his head back until the two of them were at eye level. "Bet they'd be more shocked to hear I bent you over this counter..." he leaned in for the kiss, but it was only a touch of lips, "...and fucked you 'til you came."

Luke dropped his hands between them, grasping Michael's wrists gently, preventing him from going any further than unzipping his pants. He put Michael's hands on his hips, freeing up the space between them to unzip Michael's jeans instead. "I want to kiss every inch of your body," he said softly, "want to get you so hard that you're gasping for it, begging me to put my cock in you." Luke slipped his fingers into the gap of denim at the crotch, grazing the outline of Michael's dick before he found the waistline of the fabric. Then Luke slid his hand inside Michael's underwear, pressing a deep kiss, tongues and teeth, against Michael's mouth. Luke wrapped his fingers around his bandmate's erection and squeezed gently, careful not to rub the skin (no lube, he'd have to get that before they did anything more than blow each other). "I'm gonna suck you off," he promised in a purr, "then I'm gonna fuck you." When Michael didn't protest, Luke kissed him.

Luke touched his lips Michael's cheek, his jawline, and his hair. "Get on the counter, Michael," Luke murmured against his ear, sucking on the lobe, "Spread your legs for me." The thought of Michael, naked and wanting and open, was so fucking hot. Luke pushed the other boy's pants down, over the curve of his ass, then his underwear followed. Luke glanced down between them as he eased Michael's cock, hard and hot, out of the soft fabric.

 

 **MICHAEL:** Michael hadn’t really expected the response he got to mentioning Luke’s friends and when his bandmate tugged his hair to pull his head back, he hissed faintly. It hadn’t hurt. Actually, it had felt really good and Michael licked his lips to wet them as Luke spoke, telling him they’d be more shocked if they learned he’d fucked Michael bent over the counter. A shudder shot through him and Michael moaned softly at the thought. He didn’t have a hell of a lot of experience; a girl when he was fourteen though they’d never actually had sex, and a guy last summer he met when he and his family had gone on vacation. They had had sex a few times over the two weeks Michael’s family had been there. It had been a little awkward, a lot uncomfortable (the first time) and something he didn’t regret in the least. Though since that summer he hadn’t slept with anyone because there was no one Michael wanted to sleep with. Except now. Except Luke. He very much wanted for Luke to make that happen. Michael had lube in his nightstand, which was inconvenient but they might end up making it to his room. Maybe.

When Luke reached for his wrists, stopping him from undoing his jeans, Michael leaned back and looked up at Luke curiously and wondered if he’d done something wrong. Luke placed his hands against his hips and reached between them, undoing his pants instead and when he spoke, it brought a smile to Michael's face. Just Luke’s words alone brought a soft moan from him but it was even better when Luke traced the shape of Michael's cock. Then Luke's hand was reaching beneath the waistband at the same time he kissed Michael, all tongue and teeth, and he groaned it as Luke grasped his dick. Luke was confident, sure, and Michael wasn’t doing anything to knock down his ego. He was right, Michael would beg for it if that’s what his bandmate wanted because at the moment it didn't matter. Luke’s ego, their differences, the fact this was probably a bad idea didn’t matter because Michael wanted him desperately.

A grin lit up Michael's features when he was told to get on the counter and spread his legs, Luke's lips against his cheek, his jaw, his hair. Then against his ear as Luke whispered to him before sucking on the lobe. Michael shivered, his eyes closed and biting down on his lower lip as he nodded. Michael would do anything the guy wanted right now. Luke pushed Michael's pants down over his ass, his underwear followed a moment later, and when he eased his cock out of the material a soft whimper came from Michael. He reached back for the counter, fingers curled around the edge with the intention of sliding onto it when Michael heard the front door open and his sister’s voice call throughout the house, asking if anyone was home.

“Shit. Shit!” Michael swore, scrambling for his underwear and pants and yanking them back up. “Put your fucking shirt back on.” He hissed at Luke, not intending to sound so harsh but his heart was in his throat. The last thing Michael wanted was for his sister to catch him like this. The only thing worse than that would be his parents. Michael bent for his shirt and tugged it over his head, realized it was backwards, and swore again as he rearranged it just in time for his sister to turn the corner. “Hey, Madison…” he greeted, his nerves jumping. Michael was still flushed, lips swollen from kissing and his dick was ridiculously hard. He stayed behind the counter. “Mom and dad won’t be home till later.” He shot a glance at his bandmate. “You know Luke, right?” Of course she did. Everyone did.

Madison was obviously shocked to find Luke Hemmings in their kitchen and she didn’t say much, only muttered something about going up to her room. She said hello to Luke and gave him a shy smile, her cheeks flushed pink and Michael rolled his eyes. His sister was just one of the many freshman girls who wanted to be Mrs. Luke Hemmings one day. If only they knew what had just happened between Michael and Luke they’d drown in their teen girl tears. Madison backed out of the kitchen slowly, never actually taking her eyes off Luke until she was out of sight, and only then did Michael breathe a sigh of relief.

He leaned back against the counter and swallowed thickly. Michael felt caught somewhere between terrified and horny as fuck. It was a strange combination. Michael ran a hand through his hair and looked up at Luke with a faint smirk. “You should probably go.” Honestly, he wanted to choke his sister right now. “See you at school on Monday.” God, Michael wanted to shove Luke into the wall and continue where they’d left off but they couldn’t. Not with his sister home.

 

 **LUKE:** Luke's eyes widened at the sound of someone's voice, and suddenly Michael was tucking his cock back in his underwear, yanking up his pants, and snapping at him to get his shirt on. Biting back a smartass retort, Luke swiped it off the tile and pulled it on, shoving his hands into the back pockets of his jeans to readjust them. A pretty girl walked into the kitchen and Luke knew that was Michael's sister, but he'd forgotten her name until Michael said it. He even did introductions which sort of amused Luke, and he smirked at the freshman. "Hey Madison, how's it going?" Good, apparently. She walked backwards out of the kitchen and Luke gave her a slight wave before she disappeared from view. Then he turned back to Michael, who suggested that he go. Luke was disappointed, and with a reluctant sigh he nodded. But not before stepping in front of the guitarist, sliding his hand down between them, and stroking his fingers over Michael's crotch. "You better think of me when you're dealing with that," he said softly. Luke grinned at Michael, flashing dimples, and stepped away.

"See you Monday." Luke found his way out of the house without running into any more of Michael's family members. He drove back to his place - he never jerked off in the car because he didn't want to get that stuff on the seats - and managed to avoid his parents, taking his second shower of the day. And this one was only so he could take care of himself. And all he thought about was how Michael's mouth or his ass would feel so much better than his own hand. It was a damn disappointing end to the day, though still better than yesterday when he was sick and babbling drunk. And Michael hadn't told him to fuck off.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aha~ I feel like I left you all on a cliffhanger with the last chapter and I don't even really feel that bad about it! ;) You're right, I totally did that on purpose even though that thread between my gf and I continued. Here's the next part for you though! This is SMUT. Lots of it. Enjoy!
> 
> P.S. If it looks like Luke's first post is short, it's not meant to be! It was a continuation from the last thread. :3

**LUKE:**  Luke never looked forward to getting up on Monday morning especially when he spent the weekend hungover, but he was looking forward to seeing Michael. Luke picked up his girlfriend and took her to school but he was only half listening to what she said, and he took off once she met up with a couple of the other cheerleaders outside of the school. Luke threaded his way through the hallways and he managed to catch sight of Michael's very distinctive hair as the warning bell rang for homeroom. "Hey," Luke slipped in front of Michael with a smile, giving him an appreciative once over. "Come see me during first period. Boys' bathroom upstairs, 8:30. Okay?" Luke would've waited for confirmation but one of his friends - his other friends, non-band friends, a guy from the soccer team named Rob - showed up with pictures from Saturday night's party (which he missed and his girlfriend was pissed about it).

Luke glanced over his shoulder to Michael with a grin before he took off for math class. Even twenty minutes of pre-calculus was too much fucking pre-calculus and Luke couldn't wait to get the hell out of there. Shoving his hall pass in his back pocket, he made his way to the boy's bathroom and he beat Michael there. Luke pushed in all the stall doors to make sure it was empty, and while he waited for Michae, he checked out his hair in the mirror. It didn't really occur to him that Michael might not show up until 8:31, but then the door swung open and he glanced up, smirking at the sight of Michael in the mirror. Luke turned around to face him, and didn't waste time thinking of something to say because there was nothing he wanted to say - there was stuff Luke wanted to do. So he crossed the bathroom in three strides and kissed Michael, cupping Michael's face in his hands and backing him into the door.

 

**MICHAEL:** Sunday morning had been difficult because Michael had spent the entire day trying not to text Luke to see if he wanted to meet up on the trails again and pick up where they’d left off in his kitchen. Each time he picked up his phone and typed out a message Michael would immediately delete it and put it down. What had happened between them was something that Michael didn’t want to get too caught up in. There were a lot of variables and most of them worked against them. Even if they were bandmates now that’s all they ever could be. Luke wasn’t his friend. They weren’t going to be lovers. Michael couldn’t let himself get lost in the heat of the moment like that again. All his life he’d dealt with people being jackasses toward him just for being different and Michael wasn’t out yet. Not really. His parents knew and his sister didn’t pay attention but Michael couldn’t bear the idea of coming out to people at school. Calum and Ashton probably knew but they’d never talked about it. Michael wasn’t going to come out of the closet as Luke Hemmings’ boyfriend. There was no scenario he could think of in which that ended up fine and dandy. Luke was popular, he was rich and he had a fucking girlfriend for fuck’s sake. What happened in the kitchen was something that couldn’t happen again. Michael wouldn’t let it.

By the time he fell asleep that night, Michael had convinced himself that it was just a fluke and that he didn’t have anything to worry about. They would go back to the usual; Luke ignoring him at school because his friends thought he was weird and Michael not acknowledging his existence. That’s what they knew and what was most comfortable. Surely Luke would realize that too. Michael slept fitfully that night and when his alarm clock went off at 6:30 am he bashed it off the nightstand. Michael dragged himself out of bed, showered, dressed and pulled on a pair of black Converse. Madison was already in the kitchen by the time he came down, makeup and hair on point and dressed way too old for fourteen and it made him roll his eyes. His parents didn’t believe in restricting their fashion choices as long as it didn’t get them in trouble at school. Freshman girls always tried so hard to look older to impress the upperclassmen and it had always made him want to puke. Conformity was a sickness. They got to school in time for the first bell to ring and Michael rushed to his locker to put away the books for he didn’t need for his morning classes. He was trying not to be late for class so he wasn’t paying attention to the fact Luke was sliding up to him. The second Michael heard Luke’s voice, he froze, startled by the fact the guy was actually speaking to him in the middle of the hallway. Luke said to meet him in the boy’s bathroom on the second floor at 8:30 and it took a moment to register in Michael’s brain. By the time it had, Luke had already left with one of his stupid friends.

Michael walked to class, his mind spinning and his heart racing. Part of him wanted to meet Luke to see if they would continue on with their little hook up, but the other part of him was worried it was a joke. Paranoia seeped into Michael as he convinced himself that was a likely scenario, get him alone just to embarrass him. They’d done it before when they were younger. Michael didn’t trust them. He didn’t trust Luke either. By the time he slid into his desk, gaze unfocused and barely listening to what his teacher was saying, Michael told himself that he needed to set the record straight with Luke. Not just for his sake but for the sake of the band. Calum was attempting to talk to him about something and he wasn’t listening so his friend gave up. Michael’s eyes were on the clock, watching the half an hour to 8:30 tick down and he focused on breathing properly. Right. This wouldn’t be so bad. He’d meet Luke and tell him that whatever had happened was stupid and it wouldn’t happen again. It was just a dumb moment between them. No big deal.

That conviction lasted as Michael asked to use the bathroom, got his hall pass, and made the trip upstairs to the boy’s bathroom. Michael's fingers were curled so tightly around the straps of his backpack that his knuckles were white and he was repeating to himself what he planned to say. Michael got to the bathroom and pressed his ear to the outside of the door to listen and see if anyone else was in the bathroom. Michael didn’t hear anyone and he went it to find Luke was already there looking like he’d just stepped out of Alternative Press, and he was finding it hard to speak or even breathe. He was so fucked.

Michael barely opened his mouth to speak when Luke crossed the bathroom in three strides and kissed him, pressing his back against the door. A groan came out of Michael and he untangled himself from the backpack before his fingers slid into Luke’s hair, holding him into the kiss that was tongues and teeth, needy and hungry. Michael was doing the very thing he promised himself he wouldn’t and when logic kicked in, he broke the kiss with a gasp. “Luke, w-wait…” he panted. His fingers left the other boy’s hair and went to his shoulder in a half-hearted attempt to push him away. “This is a bad idea. The band...we can’t...fuck…” Michael's head fell back against the door with a soft thump. Why did Luke have to do this? Why did he have to make Michael want him so much? Michael hated him. But not really. Not at all.

 

**LUKE:** Luke smiled into the kiss and Michael groaned, reaching for him and sliding fingers into his hair. Lips parting, he sucked on the tip of Michael's tongue, rolling his lipring over it, and Luke's fingers dropped down to Michael's waist, hooking into the waistband of the jeans. Luke felt the warm, wet pressure of teeth on his lip and moaned in encouragement, his hands skimming Michael's hips and thighs before sliding around to the small of his back - just above his ass. Michael was giving him all the right signals so when he abruptly pulled away with a gasp, telling him to wait, pushing his shoulder, Luke didn't understand. He let go of Michael's hips but he didn't really back off, bracing his hands against the door on either side of Michael's head. Wait? Wait for what? Michael said this was a bad idea and Luke scoffed a little. It didn't seem like such a bad idea in his kitchen yesterday, unless he meant 'bad idea' in terms of fucking in a bathroom stall which, hell, wasn't Luke's first choice either. The last thing he expected was for Michael to bring up the band in all this.

"What do you mean 'we can't'?" It wasn't a 'no, fuck off, I'm not interested.' So Luke figured he wasn't being a dick for trying to figure out why Michael would pump the brakes on this. They weren't drunk on Saturday. They both knew what they were doing and they both wanted it. "Why would Ash and Calum care whether or not I sucked your dick in the school bathroom? Are you planning to tell them?" Luke hadn't thought that far ahead to be honest, but he never gave much thought to that sort of shit. Luke mostly did what he wanted with who he wanted, and because this was a small town nobody talked about it. And of all the douchebags in Manassas, Luke couldn't see Calum giving a shit. Maybe Ashton. The Irwins were really devout whackadoo Christians and Luke's family wasn't. The Hemmings went to church every week but that was 80% social and political networking, 15% public acts of charity, and 5% actually checking in with God. They weren't a religious family. They were Republican for the tax breaks.

Ashton wasn't like his parents, though, and if this wasn't about Michael being worried about what the other guys would think then what else did the band have to do with it? "Is this like a Yoko thing? You think us hooking up will fuck up the band?" Eh, he guessed that made more sense than his first idea. "You don't think I take it seriously, do you?" That kind of annoyed Luke but he let it go, because he was more interested in persuading Michael to shut up and take his pants off. Luke didn't want to talk about bad shit that might happen. It was a mood killer. "Nothing's gonna keep us from getting out of this town," he promised, leaning forward to press a kiss to Michael's chin and chin, then his teeth nipped a trail along the line of Michael's jaw to his ear, "We won't let it, Michael. We won't let this fuck up our chances." Luke dropped one hand to the guitarist's shoulder, tugging the sleeve of his shirt out of the way to suck a hickey into the skin. When he'd finished, Luke raised his head and met his Michael's gaze and smiled at him.

"Let's get out of here." Luke had a Chemistry quiz second period that he wasn't interested in taking, and maybe Michael would relax if they weren't hooking up at school. "We can take my car," he suggested, sliding the fingers of his free hand down Michael's chest and over the crotch of his jeans. "My parents are gone all day." Luke cupped Michael's cock through the denim, searching his eyes for any indication that he wasn't into this. "C'mon, Michael..."

 

**MICHAEL:** No, Michael didn’t plan to tell either Calum or Ashton about any of this because a.) they wouldn’t care, and b.) it was none of their business. Them knowing or not knowing wasn’t the issue at all. It was the fact that Michael didn’t trust himself with Luke. It had been easier when they disliked each other and knew where they stood with one another. But somewhere along the way something fundamental had shifted between them and attraction had gotten involved. Which could be really messy if feelings were to get involved as well. Michael banished the thought immediately from his head because they wouldn’t. He had no plans on getting involved with Luke in any way that was romantic and if they were just fooling around or having sex then maybe it would be okay. Michael didn’t have the experience really to know whether he could have a physical relationship with someone and not get emotionally intimate with them. Not that he had the option because Luke was still technically dating the captain of the cheer squad. Michael wondered if by ditching Manassas that meant Luke planned to ditch her too. They would find out, maybe.

A scoff left Michael at the mention of Yoko Ono and he rolled his eyes. “Yoko wasn’t in the band, dumbass.” It was on the tip of his tongue to mention that Amber would potentially be their Yoko but Michael didn’t want to cause an argument. Not when he was still pinned between Luke’s body and the door and it had him feeling some kind of way. Luke said he felt like Michael felt as though he wasn’t taking this seriously and he could hear the edge of annoyance in Luke's voice. It passed quickly enough; however, and Luke was promising (without actually using the word ‘promise’) that they were getting out of Virginia and nothing would fuck it up because they wouldn’t let it. Michael was almost convinced of this, especially because Luke’s mouth was trailing along his jaw and toward his ear. He found himself tilting his head to the side without making the conscious decision to do so and he blinked his eyes open to look up at the ceiling of the bathroom. Michael bit down on the corner of his lip as Luke tugged the collar of his shirt to the side so he could suck a hickey into the skin, bringing a soft moan from Michael. He was so weak and he wanted Luke so bad that when Luke suggested they leave, Michael nodded all too willingly. “Okay.” Of course, it helped that Luke’s hand had found the way to the front of his jeans, cupping Michael's dick through the material. How could he say no to that? He was already half aroused.

Class hadn’t ended yet so Michael wasn’t too worried about being spotted leaving the campus with Luke and he kept quiet as he followed him to his car. Michael's mind was racing but those thoughts were different from what they had been before he’d gotten to the bathroom ten minutes ago. Michael was confident he could sleep with Luke and not let it interfere with the band or his personal life because it was just sex. No emotion. No expectations. Nothing of the sort. No one was going to know about it and Michael planned to make that perfectly clear to Luke at some point. If Luke wanted to hook up with Michael, it was fine as long as he kept his mouth shut about it. Those were the conditions he planned to set and if Luke didn’t like it then to fucking bad. That decision made, Michael stopped thinking about the ‘what ifs’ entirely and let himself actually get into the idea of sleeping with Luke. The irony of it was not lost on him. How strange it was to go from actively disliking someone to wanting him to fuck you until you couldn’t see straight.

Luke’s car was flashy, a sports car that was way too expensive and impractical. Michael smirked faintly at the idea they’d probably never fuck in the backseat of it because it was too small and both of them were easily six feet tall, Luke being a few inches over that. Michael didn’t let himself think about the possibility that Amber had seen the backseat of his car either because that would only annoy him. Luke unlocked the car and Michael slid into the seat, his backpack between his feet on the floorboard and he reached for the seat belt, though even as they left the parking lot (somehow not getting caught) an idea was forming in his head. Michael grinned faintly to himself before turning in the seat so he could face Luke in the driver’s seat. “Can I try something?” he asked. Michael had wondered what it was like to give someone a blowjob while they were driving. Luke agreed and Michael drew in a breath. “Try not to kill us, yeah?”

Undoing the seat belt, Michael shifted in the seat so he could lean over the center console of the vehicle. He didn’t waste time undoing Luke’s belt and jeans and as he reached inside the pants and cotton underwear, Michael realized his hands were a little shaky from nervousness. Michael wasn’t overly experienced in oral sex and he was trying really hard not to think about what basis for comparison Luke had. Not to mention he was nervous about seeing Luke’s cock in general. Gently, he eased Luke’s half erection out of his jeans and smiled faintly. “Not bad,” Michael teased, flicking his gaze up to Luke’s, eyes amused. Michael was actually quite fucking impressed. Fingers wrapped around Luke's dick and he gave it a gentle squeeze until Luke was fully hard before Michael bent over his lap and ran his tongue over the velvet soft head. Michael moaned softly at the first taste of pre-come on the tip before taking the head into his mouth and sucking softly. Slowly, almost painstakingly so, Michael took Luke into his mouth inch by inch until he could take it no further. Michael tightened his mouth on Luke and drew back and repeated the process until he found a rhythm.

 

**LUKE:** "Clifford, shut up." Of course he knew that Yoko wasn't in the band because he wasn't a dumbass, and right now Michael was getting on his nerves. But he got on Luke's nerves a lot less when he wasn't talking, and moaning instead. Luke liked the way it sounded, he liked the way Michael's body opened up for him, and he wanted to take him home. Luke wasn't sure whether or not Michaelwould skip school so he rewarded Michael with a brilliant grin when he agreed. "Okay." He pressed another kiss to Michael's mouth and stepped back, checking his reflection before they left. What? Michael was messing with his hair which he didn't mind, but he liked it to look a certain way in public. Once he fixed that, he was ready to go, and it was too easy to sneak out of school. Luke texted a friend of his to grab his backpack and clear his shit off the desk in math class, giving the excuse that he was sick (food poisoning?).

Luke slid into the driver's seat and turned on the car grabbing his sunglasses from the visor because it was sunny and also, he looked great in them. They pulled out of the school parking lot and onto the road, and he glanced sideways at Michael when the guitarist spoke, asking Luke whether or not he could try something. "Yeah, okay." Luke was particular about his car (most guys were unless they drove a piece of junk). No one touched the radio, no one brought soda or fast food or cigarettes. Michael warned him not to get them killed, and Luke raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing?" Michael unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned over - and Luke realized what Michael was doing when he reached for his jeans. Luke let out a brief, breathless laugh, leaning his head back because a part of him could not fucking believe this was happening.

He'd never gotten road head before. Luke wondered if Michael had ever done it before, but he forgot to ask when he felt fingers on his cock, easing his erection out of his jeans. "Jesus," he said softly, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth in anticipation. Luke's grip on the steering wheel was so tight it turned his knuckles white, and he tried to focus on the Explorer a couple car lengths ahead, and the bumper sticker on the back that said _My Yorkie is Smarter Than Your Honor Student._  Luke glanced down at his lap, pushing his sunglasses back on top of his head (he wanted to watch this), and met Michael's gaze. His eyes narrowed slightly when all the other boy managed to say was 'not bad'. "Fuck you," Luke retorted breathlessly, forcing himself to look back at the road as Michael squeezed his cock. Luke groaned, a shudder working its way down his spine at the first pass of Michael's tongue, hot and wet, against his erection. "God, Michael." The way Michael moaned...it was so sexy.

Luke's legs felt like they were jello, and it was so fucking hard to stay focused on the road, to keep his foot on the gas pedal - but not too hard, just enough - and he tried so hard to control the way his body quivered, the tension in his thighs. Luke was panting as Michael found his rhythm, mouth tight and hot, taking more of him than his girlfriend ever did - and his eyelids fluttered but he kept them open, staring at the road in front of him, the lines on either side that kept him in his lane. Luke couldn't breathe, couldn't think beyond the fact that nothing had ever felt this fucking good. The car rolled to a stop at a red light and Luke let out a relieved moan, tilting his head back momentarily. He dropped one hand to his lap, running his fingers through Michael's hair gently, watching his head bob up and down over his cock. "You are so, so fucking hot," Luke murmured in encouragement, startled by the short sound of a car horn. Luke rolled his eyes, glancing up to see that the light had turned green and he missed it - distracted by Michael.

Waving a dismissive hand to the guy behind him, Luke put both hands back on the wheel and he took the next left off the main drag. "Mike, I-" he broke off with a moan, pleasure tightening low in his stomach, hot and building fast until his whole body felt like it was on fire, "I'm coming." Luke thought he could make it home before he came but he couldn't, and a few seconds later, he ran the car into the shoulder of the road, the orgasm hitting him so hard he couldn't see. Luke managed to hit the brakes before he rolled into the ditch, dropping one hand down to catch Michael's head so he wouldn't smack it against the underside of the steering wheel. "Sorry," he managed, letting go of the other boy. "You okay?" He didn't kill them - and Michael didn't bite his dick off, so they were good. Luke pulled back onto the road and a minute later, he turned into the subdivision; it was gated but the security guard knew his license plate and let him in. Then he drove up to the house. It wasn't until he'd pulled into the driveway and parked the car that Luke shifted to face Michael, grabbing him by the collar and pulling him into a kiss. A very grateful, very turned on kiss. "That was..." he shook his head, still flushed, grinning at Michael. It was amazing, worth almost dying. "...not bad."

 

**MICHAEL:** Michael hummed softly at the feeling of fingers running through his hair, eyes closing as his head bobbed along Luke’s cock, mindful that he didn’t scrape the shaft with his teeth. So far Luke seemed to be doing okay and he was staying on the road. The soft moans, the words, his uneven breathing all encouraged Michael to continue. He would have laughed at the sound of someone blowing their horn when Luke took too long when the light turned green but he was pretty well occupied. Honestly, he wished he could do more but the space was limited since they were in Luke’s car so this would have to do. Michael honestly wasn’t sure what was going to happen once they got back to Luke’s house but sucking his cock while he was driving had turned him on like crazy. His own erection was pressing against the material of his skinny jeans, uncomfortable already but Michael was able to ignore it for now. He felt the car turn just as Luke said his name and told him he was coming. Luke hit the brakes then and Michael had just barely taken his mouth off of him and covered the head of Luke's dick with his hand so he didn’t come everywhere. Luke’s hand was at the back of his head, shielding him from hitting the steering wheel and he was grateful for that.

“I’m okay,” he reassured his bandmate. The palm of his hand was sticky with Luke’s release and Michael wrinkled his nose faintly as he sat back up in his seat. It would have been easier just to swallow but they weren’t at such a point in their relationship (if you could call it that) that Michael was willing to do that. With his clean hand, Michael opened the glovebox of the car with the hope of finding tissues or napkins or something else absorbent to clean his other hand off. No such luck. Finally, he managed to get the zipper of his backpack open with some difficulty and dug for the extra shirt he had stuffed in the bottom of his bag. Michael wiped his hand off on it, balled it up so come wouldn’t get on anything else and stuffed it away. All of two seconds later they were in Luke’s driveway and Luke was tugging him by the collar to kiss him. Michael made a soft sound into it and when it was broken, his breathing was a little uneven from the arousal coursing through him. Luke threw his words back at him and Michael scoffed. “Not bad? You came in like three seconds.” He couldn’t help the grin that came over his features, which he flashed at Luke before getting out of the car.

Michael looked over the top of the vehicle and up at the house, his lips pressing together in a thin line. This was a part of town he didn’t frequent and since Luke lived in a gated community he’d never actually seen where he lived. Michael knew Luke’s parents were rich but the house before him was ridiculous. He felt like he was too poor to even look at it and he couldn’t imagine what the inside looked like. “You sure this place is gonna let riff raff like me in?” Michael asked, tone a mix of sarcasm and nervousness. Michael left his backpack in the car (he wouldn’t need it) but made sure his phone was in his pocket. He followed Luke up and into the house and when they got into the foyer, he was just as blown away. Everything was so clean and like no one even lived here at all. It was such a stark difference from his own house which actually looked like people lived their daily and they were constantly finding dog hair from Brinks and his sister’s evil cat everywhere. Michael figured if you were rich enough to live in a place like this you were probably rich enough to pay for people to clean it.

A million snarky comments were on the tip of Michael's tongue but when his gaze fell on Luke, they seemed to disappear and he found himself groping for something to say. He felt like an alien standing in a place like this. “You sure your parents aren’t going to be home anytime soon?” Michael already knew his parents were going to grill him about why he’d skipped school but he had an excuse in the works. He was a good student and he didn’t ditch school unless he really had to so Michael could tell them he’d been feeling sick and they’d buy it. He felt a little bad that he was going to lie to them but it was just one time. Michael wouldn’t make a habit of skipping school so he could roll around in the sack with Luke. There was space between them, too much space and Michael found himself gravitating towards Luke, and fingers curled in the front of Luke's shirt so Michael could tug him forward and into a kiss, tongue immediately parting Luke’s lips so he could taste him. It was addictive. Michael wanted more.

 

**LUKE:** Three seconds? "It was longer than that," Luke protested with an incredulous laugh, shaking his head in response to Michael's grin. He couldn't be that offended after the orgasm he had, but it still took him a minute to tuck himself back in his jeans and check the seats and the floorboard to make sure nothing spilled (because that would've sucked). But the car looked good so he locked the doors behind them and led Michael through the front door instead of the garage, taking the steps two at a time. Michael cracked some smartass remark about being riff raff, and Luke shot him a look. "The bouncer's off duty," he winked Michael teasingly, "C'mon." Luke unlocked the door and stepped inside, disarming the alarm on the wall panel.

He shut the door behind Michael, ignoring the way his bandmate gaped at the foyer. Luke took off his shoes, glancing up at Michael when he asked about his parents. "They have a charity luncheon in D.C. My dad is the guest speaker. Marina - she's our chef - doesn't come in until four so..." Luke shrugged, "We're good." His parents didn't hire live-in help but they did have a maid service, lawn service, and culinary staff. Luke had never seen his mother cook. That seemed to reassure Michael enough to walk over to him and grip the front of his shirt. Luke grinned in response, offering no resistance as he was tugged forward, and wrapped his arms around Michael's waist as they kissed. Luke dragged his teeth over Michael's bottom lip as he sucked on it, and his eyes slid shut. He blinked and broke the kiss a few seconds later, smiling against Michael's mouth. "My room." Luke let go of Michael's waist and took his hand, leading him up the stairs, past the second floor (which was strictly for entertaining guests: the second kitchen, the piano, the arcade, the pool tables, the bar, the movie room, etc.) to the third floor where they slept.

Luke's was at the end of the hall. It was the only room in the entire house that felt like his because his parents relented, letting him decorate it the way he wanted - with his favorite bands, his records, his guitars, and his recording equipment. Everything that he cared about was in this room (excluding the car, but he had a picture of it as his screensaver). "The maids don't come on Mondays," Luke said by way of apology. There were clothes tossed over his chair and the bed was only half-made. Luke emptied his pockets on the desk, cell phone, wallet, and keys. He silenced the phone, then he turned to face Michael, glancing down to his jeans with a smirk. Luke crossed the room and cupped Michael's face in his hands, kissing him again. Tipping Michael's head back with the pressure of his fingers, Luke's tongue swept over his lips and pushed in, hot and wet and hungry. His tongue curled around Michael's, licking the curve of it, drawing it into his mouth. As they kissed, Luke dropped his hands to Michael's waist, working his fingers up under his shirt, skimming soft skin, and he drew back, panting, to pull the shirt up over Michael's head. Luke did the same with his own, tossing both on the floor, and instructed Michael, "On the bed, gorgeous." That was where Luke wanted him.

 

**MICHAEL:** Both the retort and the wink earned Luke an eye roll from Michael but the conversation was soon forgotten with his distraction by the house in general. Luke explained that his parents were in D.C. for some hoity toity (he was sure) event in which his father was the guest speaker. It occurred to Michael that he actually had no idea what Luke’s parents did, only that they were loaded. Luke reassured him that they would be alone until four when a chef would come in and Michael had to bite back a snarky comment. Of course they would have someone that cooked for them. It was so different from his own home. His parents had always traded off cooking responsibilities when he and Madison were kids. Since they’d gotten older, and since his parents worked more now because of being broke more often than not, Michael and his sister had taken up such responsibilities. If neither of them wanted to cook, they would fend for themselves. Peanut butter, bread and cereal were always a staple in their house. Not that any of that mattered at the moment because Michael’s lips were on Luke’s and he felt the drag of teeth against his bottom one. It brought a small moan from him and then it was broken and Michael wanted to whine about it but didn’t. Luke wanted to go up to his room.

Luke took hold of his hand and led him up the first flight of stairs. Michael didn’t get a chance to find out what was on the second floor because Luke was passing all of that. They went up the second flight of stairs and to the end of the hall where Luke led Michael into his bedroom. Michael smiled faintly as he looked around the room. It was twice the size of his own room but it looked like a teenage dwelling. There were guitars and music posters, recording equipment, a computer and it was a little messy, which Luke mentioned was because maids didn’t come in on Monday. Once more, Michael found himself holding himself back from a retort. He wondered if Luke had ever actually used a washing machine or dryer or if he could even operate one. Michael had been taking care of his own laundry since he was old enough to learn how to use the machines. “It’s fine.” He didn’t really care if Luke’s room was a little messy since his own room was way more often than not.

Luke turned away from him to empty his pockets of his wallet, keys and phone and while he did so Michael took the opportunity to check out his ass. It was a great ass. Michael looked up just as Luke turned around and approached him, cupped his face in his hands and kissed him. Michael’s eyes closed immediately as he leaned into that kiss. The time between getting out of the car and getting up to Luke’s room had softened his arousal a little bit, but the moment Luke’s tongue slid into his mouth it was like no time had passed. The kiss was hungry, almost demanding and it made Michael hum softly in pleasure. He let Luke taste him and did the same as hands dropped to his waist and slipped beneath his shirt. When the kiss was broken, Michael’s breathing was uneven and his jeans had tightened again. Their shirts came off and Luke instructed him to get on the bed. Michael made a face at him. “You’re bossy as fuck, you know that?” Not that he really minded and he’d only let Luke get away with so much of it. Michael crawled onto the bed and waited for Luke to join him.

A wicked sort of grin came over Michael’s face when Luke came within reach of him and he let Luke crawl over him before Michael moved suddenly, hands against his waist as he rolled them over so he could be on top. Michael smirked down at Luke as he straddled his waist, hips coming down to grind against his teasingly. “You didn’t think I was going to make this easy for you, did you?” he asked, breath hitching slightly as the friction sent little sparks of pleasure through him. Michael’s hands slid down along Luke's forearms until he found Luke's wrists, wrapping his fingers around them so he could pin them to the mattress on either side of Luke’s head. “If you want to fuck me then you’re gonna have to work for it. Make it worth my while.” Granted, Luke wouldn’t have to work too hard. Michael didn’t have that much restraint. He knew there was always going to be an underlying taunting between the two of them even if they were balls deep in each other but he sort of liked it. Getting Luke all riled up was quickly becoming one of Michael's favorite things.

Michael’s hands were tight around Luke’s wrists but not enough to hurt him and he leaned down to kiss him eagerly. He could feel the shape of Luke’s cock against his own through their jeans as his hips rubbed against his bandmate’s, bringing a soft moan from him. Teeth tugged at the lip ring in Luke’s bottom lip, remembering the reaction it had gotten from him the last time Michael had done it.

 

**LUKE:** Michael made a face at him and Luke smirked in response. "I know what I want." If that made him bossy, Luke would take it as a compliment. He followed the guitarist to his bed, and crawled on top of him. Luke leaned in for a kiss but Michael had other plans; suddenly, hands were on his waist and Luke was surprised, so he let Michael roll him onto his back. Michael straddled his waist, hips grinding together, and Luke twisted into it, the friction of their erections rubbing against each other through the denim. "I guess not." Michael didn't want to make this easy for him and Luke was intrigued - he didn't think Clifford had this in him, to be honest. It was kind of sexy, and Luke liked a challenge. Michael's hands slid down his forearms to his wrists, which he then pinned to the bed. His grip was tight but it didn't hurt. Michael wanted him to work for it and Luke's chest rose and fell quickly, his breathing uneven.

"It turns me on when you talk like that." But how the hell was he supposed to make this worth Michael's while if he was on his back? It was a new position for Luke. Michael leaned down and Luke raised his head, pushing his tongue into Michael's mouth to deepen the kiss. His bottom lip caught by the other guy's teeth, Luke moaned at the tug of his lip ring, the pressure rippling down his spine. The unexpected sensation made him buck hard, hips rising off the bed, pressing his erection up against Michael's through the fabric. "Tell me you don't want to know what it feels like," he panted, breaking the kiss briefly. "My cock against yours." No jeans, no underwear, no clothes. "Tell me you don't want to feel that between your legs." If he did, Luke would call him a liar. He knew that Michael wanted him too.

Luke wasn't fighting Michael's grasp, wasn't desperate enough to wrestle him on his back just yet - he was waiting for him to loosen his grip, to admit that he wanted to be fucked so good he forgot his own name. So Luke did the only thing he could do, and leaned up to kiss Michael again. This one was harder, Luke's tongue thrusting between Michael's lips and into his mouth with a playful growl. Luke wanted to taste every inch of Michael, and then he dropped his head, kissing the guitarist's chin, straining to kiss and suck along the line of his jaw, as much of it as he could reach. And he kissed hard, sucking kisses and nips, deep enough to leave marks behind for a couple hours. The thought of it shot a bolt of arousal straight to his cock, twitching in his jeans. "Come on Mikey," Luke purred his words, exhaling warm breath over the skin, hips moving slow against his Michael's. "Take the pants off."

 

**MICHAEL:** Luke looked surprised for a moment and Michael was vaguely delighted by the fact. He felt like Luke thought he had Michael figured out and he didn’t. If Luke thought he was going to be a submissive damsel then he was really, really wrong. Luke might think he was in charge but Michael wasn’t going to take his crap just because he was a Hemmings. Their relationship had changed so much in the past few weeks from antagonistic to sexually charged and sometimes it made him dizzy. This tension between them now had been building for the last couple of weeks and Michael didn’t want to ignore it. The friction between them, muted because of their jeans, was a tease and when the kiss was broken and Luke spoke it sent shivers down Michael’s spine. He couldn’t even be bothered to lie about it because it would be obvious if he was. Michael wanted Luke more than he’d ever wanted anyone in his life. It was still a strange thought for him. Just weeks ago he couldn’t stand the sight of Luke Hemmings, and now he desperately wanted his arch nemesis to fuck him until he forgot who he was.

Luke leaned up to kiss him, tongue slipping past Michael’s lips and the kiss was hard and eager. It made Michael moan and when it was broken so Luke could kiss his chin and along his jaw, his eyes fluttered shut and his grip loosened on Luke's wrists. “I want that,” he panted softly, his breathing uneven. “I want you.” Goddammit, he was weak when it came to Luke and he couldn’t even hate it at the moment. Even though Michael let go of Luke’s wrists, he didn’t have any intention of getting off of the other boy. Not yet. If Michael had him then he wanted to take his time and explore Luke. Luke told him to take his pants off and he smiled faintly. “I will...eventually…” Michael was being a tease despite how much he wanted Luke, how much his body wanted him but Michael didn’t want to rush either. So before Luke could say anything, Michael leaned over him and kissed him eagerly and sucked his lower lip between his own two. A soft moan left Michael as the tip of his tongue rolled over Luke’s lip before it was broken.

His mouth was on the move then, lips traveling along Luke’s jaw and nipping at the corner before moving up to his ear. Michael had to keep in mind that he couldn’t leave marks on Luke. Not when he was still technically dating someone. That was a thought Michael didn’t want in his head at all so he pushed it back until it wasn’t even a glimmer. Right now, Luke was his to kiss and touch and explore. Michael kissed the spot just below his ear before his teeth took hold of Luke's earlobe and he tugged at it playfully. Michael teased it with the tip of his tongue, all the while his hips still shifted against Luke’s, each brush of their erections against each other brought a soft hum of pleasure from him. He let go of Luke’s ear and shifted to press a kiss to his chin and continued down the front of Luke's throat. Michael stopped at his Adam’s apple and nipped at that as well. He didn’t spend much time there; however, continuing down to Luke's collar so he could trace it with his tongue. Michael stopped moving on top of him so he could reach between them and undo the button and zipper of Luke’s jeans. “Have you ever done this before?” he asked curiously. “Slept with another guy?” As far as he knew, Luke had only ever dated girls.

As he waited for the answer, Michael moved so that he was between Luke’s legs and gave him the ability to shift down Luke's body. Whatever the answer was, it wasn’t going to deter Michael from wanting this or from wanting Luke. Michael pressed warm, wet kisses down the center of Luke’s chest and his eyes fell closed as he enjoyed the taste of skin against his tongue. Lips brushed along Luke's right nipple and Michael felt his lover into the touch, which made him smile. The tip of his tongue traced the pink flesh, stiffened under the stimulation, before Michael took it between his teeth and tugged it once to tease him. Again, he didn’t stay in one place long before he continued his way down Luke’s stomach and stopped where the waistband of his jeans began. Michael sat up between the other boy’s legs and smiled down at him. “Now we can take the pants off.” Michale's fingers curled into the waistband of the skinny jeans and he tugged them down, along with Luke’s underwear until Luke could kick them off. Then Michael slid out of his own jeans and hesitated just a moment before the underwear followed. It wasn’t like Luke hadn’t seen him naked before. Their moment in his kitchen came rushing back and Michael shuddered. That feeling of wanting he’d had then had taken him over now.

Both of them naked now, Michael gestured for Luke to sit up and meet him in another kiss and he cupped Luke’s face in his hands. Michael had been pretty set on playing games at first but the desire for his bandmate was overwhelming. Michael rolled onto his back and brought the other boy with him so Luke was on top. The kiss broken, his breathing was uneven as he spoke. “Show me what you got.” Michael smirked faintly, taunting him slightly even as his hips raised so his cock pressed to Luke’s and he keened softly.

 

**LUKE:** Michael moaned into his mouth and Luke needed to hear it so bad, his cock pressed so tight against his jeans he could barely breathe. When Michael admitted that he wanted this, wanted him, Luke tugged his hands free of Michael's loose grip and wrapped one around the back of Michael's neck. The other sliding down between their bodies to cup Michael's cock through his jeans, fingers rubbing along the seam of the crotch. Luke's hands didn't stay in place long before they slipped around Michael's hips and over his ass, gripping it and pulling Michael closer. The pants would come off eventually.

Luke scowled but it didn't last long when Michael kissed him, sucking on his lower lip. He broke the kiss with a moan but Luke was greedy and he wanted more. "You're such a tease, Clifford," he groaned against Michael's mouth, seeking another kiss with teeth and tongue. Michael kissed along his jaw to his earlobe, and Luke gasped, arching into it. He tilted his head back as Michael kissed down his throat and it was sweeter than he expected from him - but Luke liked it. Michael undid the zipper of his jeans, relieving the pressure against his cock, and Luke glanced down at him, watching Michael crawl in between his legs.

God, he looked so sexy. "Yeah." He'd slept with one other guy but he didn't go to their school, and he wasn't out either so Luke knew he wouldn't tell anybody. Luke didn't start hooking up with guys at all until after Michael came back to school sophomore year and he... he looked so good. Something clicked for Luke and he knew what he was feeling, and because he didn't  _want_  to feel that shit for Michael Clifford, he went out and found another guy. Until then he didn't really think he was anything but straight. "But I didn't want him like I want you," he admitted, stretching his fingers out to run through Michael's hair, as lips sliding down his chest, brushing against his nipples. "Fuck," Luke moaned, shivering. He closed his eyes and tilted his head back as Michael took the right one in between his teeth.

Luke grinned when Michael finally agreed to take his pants off, lifting his hips to help work them off his own hips until he could kick them the rest of the way off. Luke propped himself up on his elbows so he could watch, bottom lip caught between his teeth, as Michael stripped down too. Luke sat up as soon as Michael gestured for him, sliding his hands over Michael's bare shoulders as they kissed. When his bandmate rolled onto his back he pulled Luke along with him and he wasted no time in straddling Michael's hips, hands braced on the bed on either side of his head, smiling into the kiss before it was broken.  _"Show me what you got."_  Luke kissed the smirk on his face just to shut him up, hips rocking against Michael's.

"Shut up," he muttered to the guitarist, burying his face in Michael's neck to kiss it, sucking the skin between his teeth in a very deliberate hickey. Luke wanted to mark Michael up  _all over_. Luke leaned over , his own cock dragging along the smooth skin of Michael's chest as he rummaged through the drawer by his bed for the lube. And, on second thought, a condom too. Luke popped the cap and poured the lube into his left hand, rubbing his palms together until it was warm, and Luke slid back down Michael's body until he was straddling Michael's thighs again. "You're such a pain in the ass," he said to Michael, but the words lacked any bite. He was smiling, almost affectionate, fingers gliding down the side of Michael's cock. Luke massaged the tip with the pad of his thumb, one hand slicking up the head and the other sliding down the shaft to squeeze the base gently, knuckles brushing against Michael's balls. "But I want you, Clifford. I want you so fucking much..." Luke slipped his fingers between Michael's balls.

Luke slicked up that thin line of muscle and skin between Michael's ass and his dick. "No way I could've sat through first period when all I could think about was you looking hot as hell on your kitchen counter, legs spread..." Everything they would've done if it wasn't for Michael's sister showing up. The words cut out towards the end, just as Luke's fingers brushed against the puckered muscle of Michael's hole, and he stroked it gently. "Come on, Michael open up for me..." Luke coaxed softly, breathlessly, face flushed as he eased his middle finger inside of Michael. He moved slow, sinking his fingertip into Michael, and when he got the second knuckle in, he started to thrust, shallow at first until Luke could stretch Michael open just a little bit more.

 

**MICHAEL:**  There was a small comfort in knowing that Luke had done this before with another guy, but also a little bit of insecurity on Michael’s part as well. He also couldn’t be sure if Luke had only slept with one other guy or more than that, and Michael didn’t want to ask. He had no right to be jealous over something like that but he knew his own personality and knew that jealousy was a streak he had. Michael still kind of hated the fact he wanted Luke as badly as he did but what was the point in fighting it now that he was naked and spread open in Luke’s bed. There was a certain vulnerability he felt about that and Michael had to fight the instinct to cover himself up so Luke couldn’t see him. Michael had never been totally comfortable in his own skin. Instead he gripped the sheets beneath him as Luke dug through the nightstand drawer for lube and a condom. Michael was glad Luke was thinking about that because he wasn’t. It was probably a good idea. Despite knowing each other practically their whole lives, they didn't _know_ each other.

Michael laughed at Luke's words and shrugged casually. “Guess you’ll either take me for who I am or you won’t.” He certainly didn’t plan on changing for anyone regardless if he was sleeping with them. Michael wasn’t the type to conform. Luke was going to have to figure it out and be chill with it. Michael secretly hoped he would because right now, as Luke hovered over him and his hand slid along the side of his cock, he looked stupidly sexy. Michael’s expression softened just a little as Luke confessed to how much he wanted him. He hissed softly as Luke touched his balls and then the space of skin between his ass and his cock. “I know...I want you too…” More than he’d ever wanted anyone in his life. Michael’s back arched faintly as Luke continued to speak, taking him back to their moment in the kitchen before Madison had interrupted them. Michael had been utterly prepared to let Luke take him bent over the counter and with no regrets whatsoever.

“Maybe we can...revisit that someday…” he murmured softly. Luke touched him then, his finger brushing over his hole and Michael groaned faintly, eyes sliding closed. It had been a long time since anyone had touched him like that and he’d forgotten how nice it felt. Touching himself didn’t count though he had done that as well. The effect of having Luke touch him was different, better, something Michael wanted so very badly. “Luke...fuck…” Michael was grateful Luke was moving slowly and giving him the time to adjust as needed. He bit down on his lower lip for a moment and shifted his hips into Luke’s touch, encouraging him to continue. “You can use another...I can take it…” Michael opened his eyes so he could watch Luke, something anticipatory in his gaze, and when Luke acquiesced and slipped a second finger inside of him, Michael groaned softly. “Just like that,” he moaned encouragingly.

Luke was so far away from him, too far for Michael to touch and kiss him properly and it annoyed him, though not enough for the arousal to abate at all. Michael spread his legs a little further apart and dug his heels into the mattress for leverage as he shifted his hips down and onto Luke’s fingers, fucking himself on them slowly. Michael’s eyes watched Luke watching him and it sent a spark of pleasure through him that was so strong he forgot all about any insecurities he had previously. Michael just wanted Luke. All of him. Over and over again. Michael reached for him then, hands grabbing at his shoulders to pull Luke into a messy kiss that was hungry and a little bit demanding, their teeth knocking together just slightly but Michael didn’t bother to apologize. One hand groped blindly along the bed in the general area of where Luke had put the condom. Michael felt the foil wrap a moment later, and broke the kiss so he could open the condom, ripping the packaging open with his teeth and slipping the rubber ring from it. “Fuck me, Luke,” he murmured softly, his eyes on his lover’s. “Now.”

 

**LUKE:** Luke bit his lip to see Michael arch into his touch, and he loved the way Michael responded to him. His eyes slid closed and the way he groaned made Luke's stomach clench tight. "Michael..." he moaned his name, dragging the syllables out with each inch that Michael took. And when Michael shifted his hips, causing Luke's entire finger to slip into him, he forgot to breathe. Michael encouraged him to add a second one. "O-okay," he murmured, meeting Michael's eyes as he pressed another fingertip to his hole, pulling the first one almost out. When Luke slid back into Michael, it was with two fingers instead of one, and he smiled when Michael reassured him that it was okay, that it felt good. All the confidence he had before, or acted like he had, it melted away and all that was left were the feelings he had for Michael. The ones he'd been fighting for months. It was so more than want.

Michael spread his legs apart and for a moment, Luke didn't understand what he was doing, then he noticed the leverage the other boy had gotten between the bed and the heels of his feet, and it was the sexiest thing Luke had ever seen. He loved watching Michael fuck himself on his fingers, to see them disappear inside of him over and over again, and he thrust to meet the movements of Michael's hips, his other hand digging into the mattress next to Michael. God, he was so hot. Luke was startled when Michael reached for him, hands grabbing at his shoulder, and he laughed joyfully as he leaned into the kiss, the sound swallowed up by the taste of Michael's lips and tongue. It was messy and rough, teeth clicking together, but that only made Luke surge into it more, slipping his tongue into the guitarist's mouth at the same time his fingers sank deep inside of Michael, as deep as he could reach. But it still wasn't enough. The kiss broke around the same time Michael got a hold of the condom, holding it up between them to rip the packaging open with his teeth. "So hot," Luke repeated with a playful growl to his words, but before he could lean in for another kiss, Michael demanded to be fucked - now. The words had an instant effect on Luke and he shuddered against his lover's body in anticipation, nodding his agreement slowly.

Luke pressed a kiss to Michael's lips, shifting to take the condom from him with his free hand. He rolled it over his cock, and leaned back to slide his fingers out of the other boy. They were slick but Luke still reached for the lube and he spread it from tip to root, fingers shaking slightly as he touched himself. "You're sure?" Luke needed Michael to be sure, he didn't think he could handle Michael regretting this - and when Michael reassured him, Luke smiled slightly in response. He slid his hands along the insides of Michael's thighs before hooking them underneath to drag him closer, the slick head of his cock nudging in against the entrance to Michael's body. Luke pulled Michael's legs around him, encouraging Michael to lock them around his waist, then he pushed forward with his hips. Luke felt Michael's body tense as he slid into him in one long, slow motion. Michael was so hot, so tight around him, it made his cock jump and pulse, and Luke let out a ragged breath, holding himself still until Michael adjusted.

His hands settled over Michael's hips, thumbs stroking the two grooves of his pelvis and Luke whispered, "Okay?" When Michael agreed, Luke's hips began to move. He wrapped the fingers of his right hand around Michael's cock, stroking it as a shudder of pleasure rolled through him. The sensation of pushing into Michael, filling him up, made Luke groan low in his throat. "M-Michael," he panted, leaning over the other boy, elbow buckling so that his weight was braced on his forearm instead of his hand. It brought him closer to Michael's face, their chests less than an inch apart, and he pushed down into his lover as he surged into a kiss, lips and tongue seeking Michael's. "You're amazing," Luke said as he broke the kiss with a gasp, pressing his hot forehead against Michael's. "You..." His lips ghosted the curve of Michael's cheek, shifting the angle of his hips, thrusting up against Michael over and over again in search of that bundle of nerves inside of him, that spot that would make Michael his. "...Perfect."

 

**MICHAEL:** Michael blinked in surprise when Luke asked him if he was sure. It was something he hadn’t expected because Luke was the type that took what he wanted. Not that Michael thought he would ever do something crazy or truly awful (he didn’t think that lowly of Luke) but since Michael was a willing participant, it mystified him slightly. Michael’s expression grew soft and he nodded with a faint smile. “Yeah, I’m sure.” He couldn’t explain the warm feeling that spread throughout his chest, or why his heart flipped over. He couldn’t explain why he wanted this more than he’d ever wanted anything or why it was Luke he wanted. Michael’s whole head was a mess but he was distracted, focused on his need and arousal, so he wasn’t attempting to sort through that confusion. It was something he could deal with later. Michael wasn’t thinking about anything other than Luke’s touch as hands slid along the inside of his thighs. Michael let out a soft laugh when Luke pulled his legs around his waist, and he bit down on his lower lip as he bracketed Luke’s body with his legs and shivered at the nudge of Luke’s cock against his entrance. Michael had enough time to draw in a breath before Luke was pushing into him.

His eyes closed and a gasp left him at the intrusion. It felt like too much and not enough all at once. It had been a long time since Michael had had anyone inside of him and Luke was filling him up slowly. For a moment, Michael felt like he couldn’t breathe because of all the sensations washing over him. One hand gripped the sheets beneath him and the other wrapped around Luke’s forearm, gripping it tightly. “Jesus…” Michael whispered softly, glad when the other boy stopped moving so Michael could adjust to him. Michael couldn’t say it didn’t hurt because it did, though it wasn’t a pain he couldn’t deal with. It would subside in a few moments and it would be worth it. Michael wasn’t even thinking of the fact he’d probably be sore tomorrow and school was going to suck. Luke asked if it was okay and Michael opened his eyes once more so he could look at his lover’s eyes. Michael really loved how blue they were. “Yeah, it’s okay. Keep going…” He wanted everything, all of Luke, all of this. Michael grinned faintly and pulled Luke just a little closer with his legs to encourage him.

A moment later, Luke moved and Michael let out a low moan. Luke’s hand wrapped around his cock and for a moment, Michael wasn’t sure how he wanted to move; if he wanted to push back onto Luke’s cock or fuck up into his fist. Both felt inexplicably good as the discomfort of having Luke’s dick in him gave way to pleasure. Luke murmured his name and Michael realized, as a sort of pleasure induced half thought, that he really, really fucking loved the way his name sounded on his Luke’s lips. Michael loved it even more when Luke told him he was amazing and Michael’s eyes closed as he smiled. “You...God, Luke...you feel so good…” Michael felt the shift and looked up to see that Luke was nearly touching him. They were so close and he tilted his head up to meet Luke’s lips, whimpering into the kiss. Everything felt so hot and overwhelming. Luke’s mouth tasted incredible and Michael wanted to put it to memory. Who knew if this would happen against between them, and if it didn’t Michael wanted to remember it.

Michael reached between them and wrapped his fingers around Luke’s wrist so Luke would stop touching his cock. As good as that felt, he wanted to wrap his body around Luke, pull him close so Michael could feel their hearts beat at the same time. The kiss was broken and Luke’s forehead pressed to his. Michael’s breath was coming in quick pants and he swallowed thickly as the other boy’s hips shifted, angled, to move deeper inside of him. Michael's fingers found their way into dirty blond locks of hair and he groaned shamelessly. “Luke, please...I need it...I need you…” Michael didn’t know why he’d said that or what made him say it. For a brief moment, he worried it would freak Luke out entirely but it passed when he felt the head of his lover’s cock touch that spot deep inside of him, causing Michael to cry out softly. “I’m gonna come,” he whimpered softly. Pleasure shot down his spine, causing Michael’s body to tense, and seconds later he came between them, hot white stripes painting the skin of their bellies and chests. Michael keened Luke’s name softly, as he wrapped his arms around Luke’s neck, and buried his face into his neck as he rode out his orgasm. Briefly, Michael wished there wasn’t a condom between them so he could feel Luke’s release inside him when he finally came as well.

As the last waves of pleasure waned, Michael fell back against the pillows, eyes closed and breathing heavily. He felt exhausted but satisfied and his skin was a little sweaty, dyed hair sticking to his forehead as he tried to collect himself. A small part of him was a little worried to open his eyes because he wasn’t sure what he was going to see. “Luke?” he asked softly. Michael just wanted to hear him speak, assure him that he wasn’t going to get weird about this.

 

**LUKE:** Michael's fingers wrapped around his wrist, stilling his hand mid-stroke, and the rhythm of Luke's hips stuttered briefly - but through the fog of want and need he figured out what his lover wanted, slipping his wrist out of Michael's grasp to interlace their fingers. He pressed Michael's hand over his head, against the bed, and held on tight as they kissed. Luke's grip loosened when the kiss was broken, but he murmured a soft sound of approval when fingers slid through his hair.

Michael groaned for him and the way he said his name, that he needed it, needed him, drew a low moan out of Luke. In that moment, he wanted to give Michael everything. He kissed Michael's jaw, that spot just under his ear, when he heard him cry out - and knew he'd hit the right spot. Luke thrust again and again, nudging against it with the tip of his cock until Michael came, his whole body tightening, tensing under him, around him, squeezing his cock until Luke's body shivered with orgasm. Luke felt the warmth of Michael's release between them and came with a gasp of Michael's name, coming hard into the condom.

Luke collapsed on top of Michael, pressing his face into the crook of Michael's neck, panting for breath and, after a few seconds, once the tremors stopped, Luke kissed his throat. His eyes slid closed and he didn't say anything, listening to the sound of his own breathing and feeling Michael's heartbeat against his chest. They were almost in sync, sweat cooling, clinging to their bodies. Michael said his name and Luke raised his head with a wordless murmur of acknowledgment, blinking open his eyes to look down at Michael. With his free hand, the one not interlaced with the guitarist's (and sticky with lube), Luke pulled the damp strands of dyed hair away from Michael's forehead, smoothing it back with a small smile. "You okay?"

He wondered if Michael wanted him to get off or something, so he reluctantly shifted onto his knees and pulled out of Michael. Condoms were a pain in the ass to take off once come started to dry anyway, so that motivated Luke to get up. Luke rolled onto the other side of the bed, sitting up to peel the rubber off and toss it into the wastebasket. What Luke wanted now was a shower but he felt weird about getting up and going to the bathroom without saying something to Michael. The problem was, he didn't really know what to say. He'd just cheated on his girlfriend (again - and for real this time, he had sex with someone else in his bed) and honestly, he didn't feel bad about it. Luke felt bad that he didn't feel bad, if that made sense, but he didn't regret it. He didn't even regret it for the sake of the band. Luke didn't know if this would happen again but he wanted it to. So instead of getting up, he shifted on the bed to face Michael, trying to figure out what he wanted to say, what would be the right thing to say now.

And Luke just thought Michael looked so beautiful, wrecked because of him, and he loved it so much. So instead of saying anything, Luke leaned over to demand a kiss from Michael, cupping Michael's jaw in his free, clean hand. And then because it would take too much work to sit up again, he flopped onto his back next to Michael and glanced up to the ceiling. "That was amazing, right?" He was so worried Michael would regret it.

 

**MICHAEL:** Luke kept asking him if he was okay, like he was worried Michael was going to bolt now that it was over, but he wasn’t sure he could move just yet even if he wanted to. “I’m okay.” A simple answer that would hopefully not leave any room for question. The heat of Luke’s body slipped away from him and Michael let out a soft moan as Luke slid out of him. He didn’t move, eyes on the ceiling because now that the pleasure and desire had subsided, Michael was left inside of his own head and that could be a strange place at times. Some small part of him was a little afraid to look at Luke because he knew that current circumstances were...not ideal. Luke still had a girlfriend and it didn’t go under Michael’s radar that he’d helped Luke cheat on said girlfriend. It made his stomach churn slightly and he felt more confused than anything. Michael had never liked Luke’s girlfriend. She was nasty by nature and had served her fair share of digs at Michael, but he still didn’t think it was right to be an accessory to Luke being unfaithful. Michael bit down on his lower lip. He wanted to say something but he wasn’t sure what.

Michael finally made the decision that he should probably go home and he was just about to move when Luke took hold of his chin and kissed him. He made a soft sound into that kiss as he returned it. Honestly, it boggled him a little bit that kissing each other had been such a frequent thing during well..everything. It seemed almost a little too intimate for the two of them when they’d hated each other just a few weeks ago. Michael wondered if he should tell Luke to stop but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. It felt good. It almost made Michael feel wanted. And when it was broken and Luke spoke, Michael smiled faintly. “Yeah, it was amazing…” That was the truth. It had been amazing. Michael didn’t think he’d ever come so hard or felt anything like it before. He was trying to find any sort of regret but there was surprisingly none.

The guitarist looked down at his chest and made a face. Streaks of his own come was drying on his skin and Michael drew in a breath. “I should probably clean this up it’s...kinda gross…” he laughed softly. Michael found the will to force himself to sit up in the bed and he finally let his eyes travel over to Luke, to his naked body that was just so...appealing. Michael could think of a hundred things he wanted to do to and with Luke. They needed to talk about this. There had to be limitations on what they did together because Michael wanted to protect himself, specifically his heart. “Can I use your bathroom?” Where did all of his clothes go? Michael slid out of the bed to gather them.

 

**LUKE:** Luke smiled back at Michael when Michael agreed that what they did was amazing - and he watched Michael sit up on the bed, pointing out that he should clean up because dried come was gross. "I don't think it's gross," Luke replied softly, and if he hadn't orgasmed twice today already, he probably could've gotten hard again just looking at Michael. Objectively, he completely agreed that dried come was gross but not on Michael, not when Luke knew he was the reason for it, that Michael said his name when it happened. Luke reached for the other boy, stroking his fingertips along the outside of Michael's thigh to his ass and his hip. Michael asked to use the bathroom and Luke sighed, disappointed when Michael got off the bed.

Luke knew he should get up too, because without Michael to distract him, he remembered how much he wanted a shower. "I'll show you where it is," he offered, not bothering to pick up his clothes because, well, it was his house. Offering to show Michael where the bathroom was - it was just an excuse to stay close to him, because it was literally next door. Luke did more than show Michael where it was, he walked into the bathroom with him. There were a lot of bathrooms in this house, so Luke could have gone anywhere else, but he didn't want to. "Towels, washrags, are under the sink." And there was extra soap in the cabinets behind the mirrors. "Let me show you how to use the shower," slipping his hand along Michael's bare back, resting on that spot just above his spine that Luke wanted to lick, he guided Michael to the sheer glass door, opening it to step inside. "Temperature," he pointed to the digital panel on the wall. "And this is for choosing which head you want - that one," the traditional angled one on the wall, "Or the waterfall one." There was a second head, larger, suspended from the ceiling. It was Luke's favorite.

"I kinda want to take a shower too," he admitted, stepping over the threshold and tugging Michael forward by the waist. "Want to take one with me? I'll show you how to use everything." That wasn't the real reason he was offering - what he wanted was more time with Michael, before he got dressed. He loved the way this felt and he wanted it to last.

 

**MICHAEL:** Michael hadn’t really been planning to actually _shower_ in Luke’s bathroom. The plan had been to wipe the come off his chest and stomach, get dressed, and shower when he got home. And instead of just directing Michael to the bathroom, Luke wanted to show him and then followed him in. Michael realized he wasn’t leaving any time soon and he was trying, and failing, to not let his eyes wander over Luke’s body. It was honestly perfect. Now that Michael wasn’t totally lost in horniness, some of the natural insecurities he felt were starting to seep back into his brain and he clutched his clothes to his chest, covering what he could. It wasn’t so much that he was worried about Luke seeing him naked (that would be silly after they’d just had sex) but he didn’t know who could just randomly walk in the house. The Hemmings were that type of rich family who hired people to clean and cook for them. Michael didn’t want to get caught buck ass naked with Luke in his bathroom.

Once inside the bathroom, Michael set his clothes down on the counter near the sink and let Luke show him where everything was. The touchscreen and digital system on the wall looked complicated. It was entirely different from his own bathroom where you still had to turn knobs and pray hellfire didn’t pour out of your shower head and down your back if you turned it too far to the left. Michael shook his head once he thought he had it figured out and was about to say so when Luke spoke first, admitting that he wanted to shower as well. Michael’s head snapped toward his bandmate, an eyebrow quirked and he wasn’t sure if Luke was joking or not. It wasn’t like he made a habit of showering with people before and it seemed...Michael wasn’t sure. It seemed like something you did with your partner, not your fuck buddy. “What am I supposed to do?” Michael asked, laughing softly. “Tell you to get the hell out of your own bathroom?” It wasn’t a no, but it wasn’t directly a yes either and that made Michael feel a little better about it.

“Turn the water on,” he nudged Luke gently so Luke would do as asked. Michael let his eyes wander faintly when Luke turned away from him, down the smooth expanse of his back to his ass. It was a nice ass. Michael appreciated it a lot, and he just barely got his eyes back up before Luke turned back around. Not surprisingly, Luke chose the waterfall setting and Michael closed his eyes and tilted his head back as the water poured down over both of them. It was just the right temperature and Michael thought he could definitely get used to something like this. He stayed close to Luke, close enough to touch him, and his hands slid up Luke's biceps gently. Rivulets of water, faintly red from the hair dye, streaked down Michael’s pale skin and a soft sound of pleasure escaped him from the way the water felt.

When he tilted his head back down and opened his eyes, Michael drew in a breath because the image before him made his stomach twist into knots. Luke’s head back, the water cascading over him and his throat open for the taking. Michael couldn’t help himself as he leaned forward and kissed it, nipped softly at Luke’s Adam’s apple before nudging up under Luke’s chin with his nose.

 

**LUKE:** Michael didn't exactly jump at the chance to shower with him, but he didn't say no either and Luke accepted the nudge to turn on the water. In a steaming rush it rained down from the waterfall shower head and after Michael closed his eyes, Luke watched him for a few seconds, the red-tinged water running down the front of his body, before doing the same. Relaxing into the touch of Michael's hands on his biceps, he tilted his head back and let the water beat down on his face and shoulders. Luke was surprised when, a few seconds later, warm lips pressed to his throat. He made a soft, encouraging sound and smiled slightly. Michael nipped at his Adam's apple, nudging up under his chin, and Luke rinsed his hands off under the water before slipping them around Michael's waist gently.

He blinked open his eyes and pulled back a little, just enough to tilt his head down and he leaned in for a kiss, parting his lips against Michael's. When the tip of his tongue brushed against Michael's, Luke moaned in appreciation, and for a few seconds he wasn't thinking about anything but kissing. Then he nudged Michael back, out from under the stream of water, with his hands backing Michael into the wall of the shower. But instead of kissing him, Luke shifted and he reached for the ledge above them where the body wash and shampoo were kept.

Still half-pinning Michael's body with his own, Luke popped the cap on the body wash and squirted some of it into his palm. It smelled like mint. Instead of sharing the body wash with Michael, Luke tentatively slid his hands along Michael's shoulders. When Michael didn't stop him, Luke soaped up the rest of his chest, fingers slipping down his lover's torso to his pelvis. Luke lingered there for a few seconds, biting his bottom lip as he glanced down between them. "Can I?" he asked, running one finger along the length of Michael's cock. Then he took it in his hand, watching Michael's face carefully to make sure it was okay. Luke soaped up the length of Michael, slipping along the tip of his cock, and underneath to cradle his balls, and when he finished, breathing hard against the side of Michael's neck, Luke kissed him again.

The kiss was messy and open mouthed, probing and deep, as he let go of Michael to brace his hands against the shower wall on either side of Michael's pale body.

 

**MICHAEL:** Michael should have known that Luke was going to be too much of a distraction for him, naked and in the shower. The smarter thing would have been to tell Luke no or to leave after wiping the release off his body. Neither of which he had done and it was hard to find a shred of regret when Luke was wet and looking so good beneath the stream of water. Their bodies were so close, almost touching completely when Luke’s hands slid over Michael's waist. A moan escaped Michael when Luke kissed him again, lips parting and tongues meeting for the hundredth time. It was broken with a gasp when Michael’s back touched the cool tile of the shower wall. His eyes opened, unsure of what it was that Luke was planning to do and laughed softly when Luke reached for the body wash on the ledge behind them. At least they were actually going to get cleaned up through this. Michael watched with a faint smirk on his face as Luke poured some of the body wash into his palm, and he raised a brow when Luke put it back without giving it to him. “Hey - oh…” Luke had ideas and Michael shivered beneath his touch.

Back pressed against the wall, and his fingertips moving up and down both of Luke’s side, Michael enjoyed the feeling of his lover’s hands as they lathered the soap against his skin. He was already half hard again by the time Luke reached his pelvis and Michael made a soft, wordless sound as he arched his back slightly, pushing into the touch. Green eyes focused on Luke, sucking in a sharp breath as Luke’s finger ran along the length of his dick. “Yeah…” he replied softly, giving Luke permission to touch him. Michael let his head fall back against the wall, eyes closing as Luke’s hand ran over his cock. He jerked slightly as Luke cupped his balls and Michael gripped his side faintly though not enough to hurt him. It was a new feeling, interesting but not unpleasant. There were so many places on his body that no one had touched before and Michael wanted Luke to explore them all. It was exactly that line of thought which brought him down to reality a moment later. Michael was already getting too involved in this.

“Luke,” he moaned softly, attempting to get his bandmate’s attention. Luke’s breath was hot against his wet skin and he had to force himself not to cling to him, not to ask Luke to get him off for a second time that afternoon. Instead of answering him, Luke kissed him and Michael whimpered into it, returning it just as messily. His brain felt like it was spinning out of orbit, his body on fire from just a few simple touches. Michael already felt like an addict who wanted more more more, and that’s what scared him most of all. So be broke the kiss with a gasping breath and brought his hands up to Luke’s shoulders to push him back slightly.

“Luke, wait…” Michael’s tone wasn’t harsh but it was firm, and he shivered faintly from how much he didn’t want to push Luke away. “We need to...we should talk about this. Not here...but…” There was no way he was going to be able to be serious when Luke was right in front of him, ever tempting. “Sorry.” He offered shyly. Michael leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to Luke’s mouth before he turned away from him so he could get cleaned up.

A few minutes later, Michael was out of the shower, dried off and dressed. He did his best to do something with the wet locks of bright red hair as he waited for Luke to join him in the bedroom once more. After a moment, Michael gave up and went to sit on the edge of the bed. The room smelled faintly of expensive cologne and sex. It sent a shiver down his spine. Michael knew if Luke wanted him again before he left there would be no hesitation on his part.

“Hey,” he said when Luke finally came into the room. “Come sit with me once you’re dressed. We need to talk about ground rules.” Michael didn’t want their to be any confusion between them. They needed boundaries.

 

**LUKE:** Michael broke the kiss first and it left Luke panting until he felt a push against his shoulders - Michael's hands, and took an unsteady step backwards. Michael told him to wait and he nodded, still out of breath, pupils blown wide, wondering what it was about Michael that made him feel like this, like going again for the third time in an hour. Luke had never done that before. Michael didn't want to do it right now; he said they should talk about 'this' which Luke knew made sense because they'd had sex and that had to change something, right?

Michael didn't want to talk in the shower and Luke didn't realize until Michael apologized that he was stomping the brakes on making out in the shower. "Oh." Luke accepted the kiss but before he even started kissing Michael back, it was over and his bandmate was turning away from him to finish washing up. Luke did the same, but he took an extra couple minutes to think not-sexy thoughts so his half-hard dick would chill out. By the time he got out of the shower, Michael wasn't there. Luke wrung out his hair and pulled it up in a sort-of bun so the ends wouldn't drip on the floor.

Then he dried off, wrapping the towel around his waist before he walked back into the bedroom. Michael was sitting on the edge of the bed, dressed - and told him to get dressed before they talked about 'ground rules'. Luke wasn't sure he was going like this conversation but he agreed anyway, rummaging through his chest of drawers for a pair of boxers - he dropped the towel and pulled them on, they were Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle themed. Then he pulled on a Nirvana t-shirt. "Sexy, huh?" Luke showed off the boxers to Michael, joining him on the bed. He sat close enough to Michael they were almost touching, and his good humor faded slightly. "So... ground rules." Did that mean this was going happen again? Luke was hoping so, and he glanced to Michael. "You sound like you've already got some."

 

**MICHAEL:** Michael thought, in theory, it would be easier to talk to Luke about this stuff as long as he was dressed. He was quickly realizing that such wasn’t the case and it was hard to be strong around Luke at all. Michael didn’t know what to think of this for the simple fact no one had the effect on him Luke did. It was difficult to comprehend so Michael knew it would be pointless to try and explain it. So he watched as Luke pulled out boxers and a t-shirt, laughing when he realized they were TMNT themed and Luke joked about them being sexy. “Never seen sexier underwear,” he retorted. When Luke joined him on the bed, Michael turned so he was better facing his bandmate. This wasn’t a conversation he wanted to have, it was a conversation they needed to have. He bit down on his lower lip for a moment and nodded. “Yeah, I guess I do.”

This was clearly not an easy thing to start and Michael hesitated for a moment before he spoke. “I don’t think anyone should know about this. Actually, I don’t want anyone to know about this. There’s too many things that could cause bullshit.” Not to mention there was the whole fact Luke had a girlfriend, but Michael couldn’t bring himself to acknowledge that out loud after they’d just had sex in Luke’s bed. “Do you really want your parents finding out you’re fucking one of your bandmates when they already hate the whole idea?” Michael asked, a brow raised. He didn’t think so because despite how Luke talked a big game, his parents still controlled his life and could force him to quit. The Hemmings might be indulging their son now but they might not continue doing so if they heard rumors.

“And this is still Manassas. Not exactly the land of the progressive,” he pointed out as a final note. Now that he had his reasons for ground rules laid out, Michael felt like Luke should understand the need for them. “So let’s start with that; no one knows, no acting like a couple, and I’m not your boyfriend, okay? Whatever else happens,” he gestured between them, “I can deal with it as long as it stays no strings attached.” Because Michael was positive that this would wear off and Luke would get bored of him. As long as he didn’t let his heart get involved then when that inevitably came it wouldn’t be a big deal. They could go one with the band as just bandmates and it would all be good. “Are you good with that?” Michael felt like he was being a little harsh but he didn’t want to come off as easily persuaded. It was too risky to let Luke get under his skin.

 

**LUKE:** The first thing Michael said was that he didn't want anyone to know about them - because there was too much bullshit that could come out of it. Luke hadn't been thinking about it and even though he agreed, it still kind of bothered him that Michael brought it up first. Luke grimaced when Michael brought up his parents - yeah, they really hated that he was in a band. They didn't know he fucked guys, let alone that he skipped school with his band's guitarist just to hook up at the house. He liked to act like he didn't care what his parents thought or said, but that was really only true for as long as they let him get away with it - Luke wasn't sure what they'd do if they found out about him and Michael. As long as he was still living at home, he didn't want them to know.

"Not really," he muttered in answer - but Michael wasn't done yet. He pointed out what they all knew: Manassas wasn't the deep south but it still wasn't that progressive, especially not where they lived. And not in his family. Michael had a lot of rules: no telling anyone, no acting like a couple, and they weren't "boyfriends". Luke wasn't sure he could have a boyfriend while he had a girlfriend so technically this should've been great - it was perfect, right?

He got sex with Michael, no strings attached, no expectations, he didn't have to give up anything. So Luke didn't know why it annoyed him that Michael didn't want to be his boyfriend - because he was sleeping with other guys? Who? Luke bit his tongue to keep from asking, he didn't want Michael to make fun of him, or think he was being jealous which probably wasn't allowed. It bothered him that all Michael wanted was sex, even though that was literally the best fucking scenario for both of them. And he was still cheating on his girlfriend. Luke didn't even have the balls to mention her, but he knew he had a lot of shit to work through. So he was faking it when Michael asked him whether or not he could deal with the terms of them being together. "Are you kidding?" Luke flashed a grin at him. "Yeah. I'm good with that." Not really, but he would be.

It was either agree or admit this was a huge fucking mistake and never do it again - and Luke didn't want to do that. He knew he was being selfish and kind of a dick but it wasn't enough to make him stop. Everything about today just felt too damn good for him to want to give up. "I don't want to talk anymore." Luke was looking for a distraction and it was sitting right next to him, smelling like his soap, skin soft and warm, hair wet, "Let's do something else," he coaxed the other boy, slipping his right hand along the side of Michael's face before he took the guitarist by the chin and kissed him again. And when Michael didn't push him off, Luke deepened the kiss, tilting his head into it. With a hungry moan, he shifted on the bed, pressing Michael back onto the rumpled comforter, and crawled on top of him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A continuation with the Cashton saga for the feels!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! So while the story is primarily Muke at the moment, my girlfriend and I love Cashton as well! We have lots of drama planned for them but it's going to come in future events. We didn't want to leave you without an update for them though! This is feelsy!

**ASHTON:** Ashton felt a little bit like he was on the outside looking in, like he’d somehow astral projected and was watching someone else’s life happen instead of his own. It was a strange feeling and he didn’t like it a whole lot. Up until recently, he and Calum had settled into a sort of routine which included Ashton staying the night at his house a lot. Even on school nights because he didn’t want to be around his parents. Most of those nights found him in Calum’s bed (they didn’t even bother with the trundle bed anymore) because they sometimes messed around and sometimes just cuddled up against each other. Sometimes they talked about the band, what they wanted out of it and getting out of Manassas or sometimes they just spent the time kissing until they were too tired to stay awake. It was comfortable in those times and Ashton enjoyed the attention that Calum gave him. The bassist never asked too much of him, never asked for anything, really. Part of Ashton felt bad because he knew there might be a small chance Calum wanted more out of him but it was hard to tell. Calum never said one way or another. Ashton couldn’t manage to be the first one to bring it up either.   
  
The problem was there were other people involved now. They’d started hanging out with a couple of girls they’d known for awhile but weren’t actively friends with. They were cute, they liked video games and most of the same music him and Calum did. Things had sort of naturally progressed in some respect but nothing had been exclusive. Still, it was weird hanging out with these girls and then going home with Calum and getting him off. When they were together, Ashton didn’t even think about the girls but rumors were flying all over school that both him and Calum had girlfriends. The girls had even started hanging out with them at lunch, much to Michael’s chagrin. Ashton had explained to the girl Michael just took awhile to open up to people. Though Michael had made it abundantly clear that girlfriends were not allowed at band practice. Michael said on account they would be distracting and if they wanted a chance to get the hell out of their town they needed to focus. It wasn’t just a rule for them either, it was a rule for Luke and Michael seemed particularly bristly about Amber. Ashton didn’t try too hard to figure out why. So he and Calum hung out with the girls when they weren’t practicing.   
  
The four of them saw a movie movie which had ended a little while ago and they had parted ways with the girls and walked back to Calum’s house.  _The Shape of Water_  had been strange and Ashton didn’t know what to think about it. “Weird ass movie, huh?” he commented as he flopped onto Calum’s bed. He’d already taken his shirt and shoes off. Ashton grabbed one of Calum’s pillows and dragged it under his head while he waited for Calum to join him. Now that Bryana and Lucy weren’t with them anymore, Ashton wasn’t thinking about them at all just like he never did when him and Calum were alone. “Not really sure how one falls for a half-fish person but whatever.” The whole thing was just odd and Ashton kind of wished he could get back the last two hours of his life.   
  
Finally, Calum got into the bed and Ashton immediately scooted closer to him and slipped an arm around his waist. Ashton rested his head against the bassist’s shoulder and closed his eyes halfway. The skin of Calum’s side was warm, soft as he moved his fingertips along it. Despite the fact they had fun with Bryana and Lucy, they just didn’t match up to Calum and how much he liked being here with his best friend. As far as Ashton knew, Calum had no plans of going exclusive with Lucy just like he had no plans to do so with Bryana. He tilted his head down and pressed a kiss to Calum’s bare shoulder. “Kinda glad we’re here now though…” Another kiss and a slight nip of teeth. Ashton’s hand traveled from Calum’s side to his stomach and then up his chest and back down again.

 

**CALUM:**  Calum said goodnight to his mom (his dad was already asleep) and he headed upstairs with Ashton, closing the door behind his best friend. "Yeah."  _The Shape of Water_  was a weird-ass movie. It was something the girls wanted to see, and Cal went along with it because he liked Del Toro's other movies.  _"Not really sure how one falls for a half-fish person but whatever."_  "Maybe if they looked like the Little Mermaid." She was hot - for an animated character and a half-fish person. Calum pulled off his shirt and changed out of his jeans, pulling on boxers before he joined Ashton. He didn't mind sharing a bed with the drummer; girls did that with their friends all the time, it wasn't a big deal, he didn't think that counted as cheating or whatever or maybe he just didn't want to give it up. As long as nothing else happened.

Cal stretched out on his back and he bit his lip, conflicted, when Ashton scooted closer to him, and slid an arm around his waist. That was okay, it felt really good so he closed his eyes. Calum didn't want to have to stop, but he and Lucy were going to try to make it work and he knew he couldn't make it work with her if he was still hooking up with Ashton. Calum kind of hated how his body instantly reacted the second Ashton kissed his shoulder, and he knew what was going to happen if he didn't stop it. He had to do it now before things went too far. "I wanna talk to you about something," he admitted to Ashton, touching the hand on his chest to still it - it was distracting, he couldn't focus. Calum shifted onto his side, with his head propped up on one hand, elbow braced against the pillow. "It's about Lucy. We were talking on the phone today and she asked me if I was seeing anybody else. And, uh," he couldn't do this, laying next to Ash, so Calum shifted again, sitting up on the bed with his back to the headboard. "I... I told her I wasn't. I mean, that's true, right?" he glanced from his lap to Ashton, hesitantly.

He knew it was stupid to think that Ash might say something right here, right now, might want to be... more. If he did, Calum would turn around and break up with Lucy tonight. He liked her a lot but he didn't love her. Right now, though, the way things were, he and Ashton  _weren't_  seeing each other. Seeing each other was more than the kind of shit they did together in his bed. It was dating, too. Going out together, to movies, to eat, being in public with someone romantically. And that wasn't what he and Ashton did.They weren't exclusive. Calum didn't think Ashton would ever be exclusive with him. Ashton dated girls a lot, which was fine and Calum got it, he dated too, but he wanted a real relationship. He knew he couldn't ask Ashton for it so he thought this would be easier for both of them. Ashton didn't have to reject him and he didn't have to hear it. Calum was afraid if he asked for more, if he admitted that he knew he wasn't straight, that it would change their friendship. They never talked about this stuff. "We agreed to be exclusive... so... um, I can't... you know..." He couldn't hook up with Ashton anymore. It wouldn't be fair. He wanted to see if things could work out with Lucy. "Is that okay?" he asked.

 

**ASHTON:** Ashton could feel the tension form in Calum’s body seconds before he said he wanted to talk to him about something. A nervous feeling settled in the pit of his stomach when Cal’s hand rested over his and stopped his movement. “Okay…” Ashton wasn’t sure he wanted to hear whatever it was that Calum was about to tell him and he considered cutting off the conversation right there. Ashton didn’t and his friend said it was about Lucy and the fact she’d asked him if he was seeing anyone else. Calum had already moved away from him and sat up against the headboard so Ashton moved as well. Instead of sitting next to the other boy; however, he leaned back against the wall. The drummer pressed his lips into a thin line as Calum looked to him for the reassurance that he wasn’t in fact seeing anyone. Ashton shook his head slowly even though every part of him wanted to scream out that Calum wasn’t available. That he was with Ashton and it meant so much more than what they did behind closed doors. He wanted to be selfish and tell Calum that it wasn’t okay and that it never would be because Ashton wanted him. He loved him and wanted to be what Cal needed even though he knew he couldn’t. Could he really be that selfish?   
  
“What?” Ashton looked up when Calum asked if it was okay for him to go exclusive with Lucy. No, it wasn’t okay at all but the words that came out of his mouth were completely different. “Yeah, of course it’s okay. Why are you even asking?” A shaky laugh left him and Ashton ran a hand through his hair. He was going to have to do better if he was going to convince Calum that it was fine. So Ashton slapped a smile on his face and looked up at his best friend. It was hard to tell what Calum was thinking or feeling in that momentl; his expression was something between hesitant and maybe a little hopeful. Ashton knew it wouldn’t be fair of him to stop something good in Cal’s life. As much as he hated the idea, as much as it would taste like battery acid on his tongue, Ashton knew he wouldn’t tell him not to pursue this. If Calum found someone that could make him happy then how could Ashton tell him not to go for it.   
  
Ashton couldn’t even say he was surprised by this. He knew eventually something like this would happen and he had thought it might bring him some kind of relief if Calum was off limits. It brought him the exact opposite of relief. He felt like someone was squeezing his heart in a vice like grip. Ashton's chest was tight and he felt like he couldn’t breathe. He had to get it together so Cal didn’t catch on to the fact it seemed like Ashton’s world was crumbling. “It’s totally cool. I’m happy for you, pal.” He sounded way more confident than he actually felt and his smile didn’t waiver. “I guess that means the trundle bed is going to get used more huh?” Ashton tried to keep his tone light and even so Calum wouldn’t question anything.   
  
He bit down on his lower lip for a moment in thought before he slid off of Calum’s. Ashton pulled the trundle bed out from beneath Calum’s and flopped onto it. The night wasn’t going exactly like he’d thought and he wasn’t sure what to do or say. “So...Fortnite?” He asked. At least if they were playing video games they wouldn’t have to talk about Cal’s new relationship. And it was better than suddenly leaving because that would only alert his friend to the the fact nothing about this was okay.

 

**CALUM:**  Ashton sat up against the wall, and even though it was easier to think when the drummer wasn't touching him, Calum was worried. He felt guilty. He didn't want to hurt Ashton and he didn't know how to say this... so he basically blurted it out.  _"What?"_  Calum felt like he'd been hit in the face when Ashton looked at him, and he wasn't sure what he was looking for Ashton's face but- whatever he thought he saw (or maybe wanted to see) wasn't there. Calum realized the 'what?' wasn't because he was mad, it was because he didn't understand why the bassist was asking him for permission. Calum blinked in response, surprise registering on his face, and he bit his bottom lip. Why was he asking? Because he thought Ashton would care. He thought it might be more than just screwing around, but maybe that was on him. Ashton laughed and Calum forced himself to smile in response, shrugging slightly. "I don't know..." This was a good thing, right? He liked Lucy and now things would be a lot less confusing, and the best part was it wouldn't be hurting Ashton because it didn't mean anything.

Or at least nothing beyond them just being friends. Ashton said he was happy for him, that it was totally cool, and Calum believed him. He laughed a little when Ashton pointed out the trundle bed was going to get used more, ducking his head in agreement. "Yeah, I guess so. Bright side, we won't be fighting over blankets anymore." That was just a joke, neither of them were blanket hogs - and Calum knew he would miss the warmth of Ashton's legs wrapped around his, Ashton's chest pressed against his back, arms around him. It was the best fucking feeling in the world, but it wasn't enough. Calum had to keep reminding himself that if he was getting everything he wanted, he wouldn't have felt this way about Lucy. She wanted a real relationship and so did he. The way Ashton reacted just confirmed that he was doing the right thing. Calum let himself get too hung up on his best friend, but now he could get over that. It was a good thing too because they got really close, the last couple times, to almost having sex and Calum knew he couldn't do that with Ashton. Not the first time, maybe not ever, and  definitely not while he was dating someone else.

Calum watched Ashton crawl off the bed, pulling out the trundle and rolling on top of it like this was no big deal - and he leaned his head back against the wall. He didn't really know what to say now, he hadn't thought this through beyond the 'me and Lucy are gonna be exclusive' thing, because he hadn't known what Ashton would say. And now that he knew... he just...  _"So..."_  The drummer was the first one to break the silence, and Calum shot him a grateful look when he mentioned Fortnite, brightening. "Yeah," a grin spread over his face, and he shifted onto his heads and knees on the bed. "That sounds awesome," he reached for his phone, "I'll text Mikey, see if he's at home." Then they could all play. It would make things feel normal again.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luke invites Michael to spend the day with his parents on a boat and it doesn't go according to plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies! This thread takes place about a month after Luke and Michael sleep together for the first time.

**LUKE:** Last night he texted Michael to ask if he was doing anything over the weekend - they didn't have a show scheduled, so apart from practice  _Luke_  didn't have any plans except for the family shit. Two weekends a month they drove down to the marina and took the boat out, and sometimes Luke brought his girlfriend but she was being a pain in the ass lately. She didn't want to go, and he suspected she was kind of pissed off he didn't ask her why. He didn't really care. He was going anyway and he planned to bring someone he liked better: Michael. It was one of those things he wanted to ask in person 'cause if he told Michael about it in advance, he probably wouldn't come. So after Luke found out his lover was free, he didn't tell the guitarist what they were doing, just that he'd be coming over at 10 a.m. with Starbucks.

He promised his parents he'd meet them at the marina at eleven o'clock, so that gave him about half an hour to persuade Michael to come with him. He got stuck behind a bus all the way until the Applebee's so he didn't end up pulling into Michael's driveway until 10:05. Luke thought about hitting the horn to get Michael to come outside, but he was trying  _not_  to piss him off because he wanted Michael to do something for him - so instead, he got out of the car, grabbed the coffee, and walked up to the house. He knocked on the door and waited until it opened, grinning at the sight of the guitarist. As much as Luke tried to tell himself that it was just sex, that he didn't care that Michael didn't want anyone to know, it was bullshit. Luke  _liked_ Michael. Even when he was being a dick Luke loved seeing Michael soft and vulnerable after they fucked, which he only got occasionally. Luke even memorized his disgusting coffee order which didn't even taste like coffee, it was so sweet.

"Morning," he held out the coffee to Michael - an iced caramel macchiato, extra caramel, to be exact, "Your parents home? Can I come in for a sec?" When Michael agreed, Luke stepped into the house and pushed the door shut behind him. He didn't let Michael get too far, reaching for his sleeve to tug him close. "Don't I get a tip for delivering the coffee?" he demanded, angling for a kiss.

 

 **MICHAEL:**  When Luke’s text came in, Michael thought about ignoring it. He was asking what Michael was doing over the weekend and he was tempted to tell Luke he had to work the entire time; however, it would be just like Luke to show up at the game store to find out that Michael had lied. So Michael texted him back and told him that he was off Saturday but had to work early on Sunday. Luke didn’t tell him why he was coming over or what he was up to and it left Michael feeling a little bit excited. Normally, he hated surprises and hated being left out of the loop but when it came to Luke everything was different. Michael was different with Luke when no one else could witness their dynamic, and over the last several weeks it had become blatantly obvious to Michael and he wasn’t sure how to feel about it. He had set ground rules in motion with Luke so neither of them would get confused when it came to...whatever this was between them. Michael was finding it more and more difficult to abide by those ground rules but nothing had changed; Luke still had a girlfriend and Michael still couldn’t let himself be reckless with his heart. There was too much potential for Luke to break it.   
  
On top of all of that, Michael’s parents were getting suspicious about why Luke was hanging around the house so much outside of band practice. They had accepted the fact Luke was part of 5 Seconds of Summer because he was talented but whenever he showed up just to hang out, Michael could feel his parents hesitance. Michael appreciated their concern because at least he knew they cared but when his mom had cornered him about it last week, it had been truly awkward. She didn’t trust Luke. She knew that Luke had bullied Michael in the past and worried about their sudden friendship. Michael had done his best to assure his mom that Luke had changed, that he wasn’t a dick anymore (mostly) and that he hadn’t dealt with assholes at school since Luke joined the band. His mom didn’t seem convinced but she hadn’t said anything else either. Michael was never going to tell her he was sleeping with Luke.   
  
So Luke was going to be at his house at ten in the morning with Starbucks, and that ultimately convinced Michael to go along with whatever shenanigans his lover wanted to get up to. Michael would do a lot for coffee. He didn’t stay up too late playing Fortnite and rolled out of bed in enough time to shower and get dressed before Luke showed up. Michael came downstairs at the right time and answered the door to find Luke on the other side, with Starbucks as promised, and looking beautiful as always. He made Michael stupidly weak and Michael hated himself a little bit for it. “Hey,” he said and stepped back so Luke could come in. “Thanks for the coffee.” Somehow, Luke had remembered his favorite drink. He didn’t let himself think about it too much.   
  
Michael opened his mouth to tell Luke he just needed to grab his shoes and bag and they could leave when Luke grabbed his sleeve and asked about a ‘tip’. Michael’s cheeks turned a faint shade of pink and he hesitated. His parents were just in the other room and he wasn’t sure what would happen if they caught Michael kissing Luke. “Uh...yeah…” He leaned in and planted a quick kiss on Luke, which was rushed and not great since he missed and kiss more of Luke’s chin than his mouth. “Lemme grab my stuff,” he mumbled.   
  
Shoes on and backpack slung over his shoulder, Michael joined Luke at the door again with his drink in hand. He called a quick goodbye to his parents and let them know he’d be back before midnight. Then they were out the door and Michael felt like he could breathe again once they were in Luke’s car. “So where are we going?” he asked finally around the straw in his mouth.

 

 **LUKE:** Luke thought he saw Michael blush and it made him smile, just before the guitarist leaned in to give him a really quick, unsatisfying kiss - probably because his parents were home. He nodded in agreement when Michael said he had to grab his stuff, and then the two of them left, walking down the steps to Luke's car. It felt safer here, just the two of them with nobody around, so when Michael asked him where they were going, Luke shook his head. "Give me a real kiss first," he said. It was a good thing he hadn't buckled himself in yet because his car wasn't made for making out, but they could do this. Luke turned to face Michael and leaned over the gear stick to kiss him. Michael's lips were already cold from the drink and his tongue tasted like caramel. Luke broke the kiss slowly and with a smile, then he turned the ignition.

"We're gonna go to the marina in Woodbridge," he answered, glancing sideways at Michael as he pulled out of the driveway - at least he couldn't bail on Luke if they were moving. He bet Michael hadn't been down to the marina, at least not the one his parents used because it was permit only with security. "My parents have a boat and it's pretty nice." Luke liked it, and he even had a sailboat of his own for awhile but that was in middle school - it was a gift from his dad when he joined the sailing club - but he hadn't sailed in years. Luke quit that stuff once he got into music.

"They take it out every other weekend and it's sort of... a family thing so I'm going, and I was thinking we could go together." There, he said it, he broke the news that his parents were coming but that was because they didn't trust him on his own with their boat. Luke knew he had to sell it because he knew his parents, the way they were, the way they'd treat Michael when they saw him - they'd never say half the shit to his face that they said behind closed doors, but that was classic. Two-faced. Bullshit. "Look, you don't have to talk to them," Luke insisted quickly. "You'll be there with me, so I don't throw myself overboard." Being alone with his parents sucked. "And the water's great. We could go swimming or... whatever." Just pretend they weren't there.

 

 **MICHAEL:** Michael was not at all surprised that Luke was unsatisfied with the kiss he’d received in the foyer of his house, but Michael also wasn’t going to shove his tongue down his bandmate’s throat while his entire family was home. That was a recipe for disaster; however, now that they were in Luke’s car he was on board with a redo. Michael smiled faintly just before Luke kissed him again, lips parting and tongues meeting, and he hoped Luke was okay with the taste of caramel. When it was broken, Michael settled into his seat and buckled up for the ride to wherever Luke was taking him. He sipped the coffee through the green straw as Luke explained they were going to the marina in Woodbridge. Not Michael’s first choice of place to hang out but he wasn’t going to complain. Luke gave into him a lot about what they were going to do (when they weren’t having sex) so Michael figured it was his turn to give a little. Michael nodded in agreement, happy to just focus on the coffee instead of talking.   
  
At least until Luke mentioned they’d be going out on a boat with his parents. Michael coughed, choking on the coffee in his surprise. For a moment, he was sure that he’d imagined that part. Why in the hell would Luke ever think that was a good idea? Michael shifted in his seat so he could face his bandmate better, his eyes wide and lips parted faintly as his brain worked to catch up with the rest of him. “What the fuck?” he blurted out. “Are you fucking kidding me right now or are you on drugs?” Because seriously this either had to be a prank or Luke really was on drugs, and knowing Luke’s social circle it wouldn’t surprise Michael. It would piss him off though. “No, Luke. No way. I’m not going.” He didn’t care what Luke said, including that Michael wouldn’t have to talk to them, he didn’t want to be trapped on a boat with the Hemmings.   
  
Michael flopped back into the seat when Luke suggested they could go swimming and pretend like his parents weren’t even there. Yeah fucking right. Like that would be an easy thing to do. Michael didn’t have the seventeen years of experience with the Hemmings that Luke did. “I can’t swim.” he muttered, eyes staring at the dash of the car so he wouldn’t be tempted to reach across the car and choke the life out of Luke at the moment. It was a good thing he had the coffee in his hand as well.   
  
Michael had tried swimming lessons as a kid but one near drowning had been enough to turn him off of being in the water for the rest of his life. The last thing he wanted to do, aside from being on a boat with the Hemmings, was to swim in the freaking ocean where God only knew what was lurking beneath the surface. The very thought of not being able to see the bottom left him feeling uneasy. “This is why you wouldn’t tell me what the plan was last night,” he said accusingly. “You didn’t want to give me the option of saying no.” And that pissed him off as well. Michael didn’t think it was fair of Luke to put him in a situation where he was going to likely be condescended to the whole time. Michael knew what Luke’s parents thought of families like his. Hell, the whole fucking town knew. They didn’t make it a secret that if you were less than high class they couldn’t be bothered. “Why didn’t you get your girlfriend to go with you?” Michael muttered before he could stop himself.   
  
So far, Amber hadn’t been a subject they’d broached and Michael knew he shouldn’t toss her in Luke’s face, but he was also upset. He didn’t like being manipulated and he felt like that was exactly what Luke was doing.

 

 **LUKE:**   _"What the fuck?"_  Luke had braced himself for something like this - he knew Michael wasn't going to like it, but he sounded even angrier than Luke expected. He shot a sideways look to his bandmate, scowling slightly out of defense. "No." He wasn't on drugs. He'd smoked pot a few times but he wasn't smoking it now and he hadn't been since joining 5 Seconds of Summer. Smoking kind of fucked up his voice, and he didn't want to lose that. Michael said he wouldn't go and Luke tried to convince him otherwise - that he could ignore the Hemmings, they could go swimming, and they'd have a great time on the water. Plus, they'd be together. Couldn't Michael at least give it a try? His parents were assholes but they weren't  _that_ bad. They weren't the Irwins. Luke's eyebrows shot up when Michael muttered that he couldn't swim. "Wait, really?" He wasn't just making that up because he was mad? Shit. Luke felt a little guilty because it hadn't even occurred to him that Michael couldn't swim. Luke thought everybody could.

Luke didn't even bother to deny it when Michael accused him of waiting until today, until Michael was in the car so he couldn't say no. It sounded worse when his bandmate got mad at him about it but yeah, that's what he did because he really didn't want to go alone. Luke thought one of their unofficial rules was that they didn't talk about Amber, so it took him by surprise when Michael brought her up - being passive aggressive as fuck, asking him why he didn't take her instead. "Wow," he breathed in response, grateful to have the road to focus on so Michael couldn't see his face. "She usually does," he replied flatly - because hey, Michael fucking asked, "We're fighting right now." He didn't think Michael wanted to hear any more about his relationship with his girlfriend and Luke didn't really want to talk about it either. "But before you spiral into thinking you're second choice or some bullshit," because it was, in fact, bullshit since Michael was his first choice in a lot of things, "I want you to meet them. I want them to meet you." That was more important, he thought. "I think if they spent time with you, they'd see... the stuff that I see," he flushed as he muttered the words, focusing on the road, "When you're not... you know, being a dick." Because he did really like Michael. Michael was smart, he was hardworking, talented, all stuff that should have mattered to his parents.

Luke rolled to a stop in front of a red light, and he glanced away from the road to look at Michael. "Look, I'm sorry I ambushed you with this." He could own up to that being a crappy thing to do, and he felt worse about it before Michael brought up Amber. "If you really can't do it, I'll take you home but..." he hesitated, "...it would really mean a lot to me if you'd come." Not only because it'd be easier for him to deal with his parents if he had Michael around, but because he was still hoping - he guessed - that they'd come around on the music stuff and support his band. "Please."

 

 **MICHAEL:**  The fact Michael couldn’t swim was forgotten as soon as he brought up Amber, and he felt even worse for doing it when Luke responded the way he did. They were fighting at the moment and he couldn’t say he was surprised. For the last month, Luke had been sleeping with him and Michael couldn’t imagine that was exactly healthy for a relationship. Michael always told himself, after they slept together, that it was the last time and that the next time he would tell Luke no. It never worked because Michael was weak. He wanted Luke and everything Luke had to offer. Michael looked out the window as his bandmate clapped back at him about being a second choice. Even though Michael didn’t want to admit it, he believed that when Luke said it because they spent so much time together. “Sorry,” he muttered. He realized that he’d broken some unspoken rule when it came to Amber and he wished he hadn’t brought it up at all.   
  
Michael fell silent as Luke continued, telling him that if he really couldn’t do it that he didn’t have to but that it would mean a lot to him. Michael sucked his lower lip between his teeth and turned slightly so he could see Luke in his periphery. It was on the tip of his tongue to ask Luke what it was that he saw in Michael that he hoped his parents would see. Michael decided not to ask. If he knew then it might change something inside of him, or bring around more emotion than he was willing to deal with. All of this just felt overwhelming, like he was going to meet his boyfriend’s parents and Michael wasn’t Luke’s boyfriend. The red light they were stopped at was about to change and Michael blew out a breath before he nodded. “Yeah, okay...I’ll go if it really means that much to you.” He would never admit that he cared about what was important to Luke. Hell, maybe this would get Luke’s parents to lay off of him a bit about the whole music thing. Michael didn’t want to be too optimistic, though.   
  
The light changed and the car moved again. Michael certainly wasn’t going to jump out of a moving car so he’d clearly missed his chance to bail. “Just...next time you want me to do something like this, be up front about it. Don’t back me into a corner like that because it’s not awesome.” Sure, Michael might have said no to Luke initially but Luke knew how to wear him down. It didn’t take a lot any more for him to persuade Michael to do things with him because Michael  _wanted_  to be with Luke. Sometimes, when he closed his eyes at night, just before he fell asleep, he would let his mind wander to places they shouldn’t. Michael could imagine what it was like to have Luke as his boyfriend, to not have to share him with anyone else. Those were pipe dreams though and Michael didn’t let himself get too lost in those fantasies because it would hurt more when Luke finally got tired of him and moved on or went back to Amber eventually.   
  
“Why am I not surprised that your parents have a boat at a marina?” he snorted, a faint grin on his features. “What is it with rich people and sailing? I don’t get it.” Michael was not the outdoors type by any means. He liked to be inside, in air conditioning, with his games and electronics. 

 

 **LUKE:** Luke's grip on the steering wheel relaxed and he nodded slightly in relief when Michael agreed to come with him. "Thank you," he muttered under his breath as the light changed - he flicked the blinker for the left lane to cross onto the interstate, but Michael wasn't done yet. He agreed, with a caveat. Next time, Luke should be upfront about it. Not back him into a corner. "You're right." It was shitty of him to do, and he should've thought this through more. Maybe Michael would've said yes anyway, but everything involving his family got Luke worked up, and he made stupid decisions. "I'm sorry, Michael." he repeated, and on impulse he reached across the car to take Michael's hand in his, squeezing it gently. If he didn't have to drive, he'd probably kiss it - and he realized too late that maybe it was too intimate, holding hands on the drive down to see his parents, so he stopped after a few seconds and let go.

It was better to have both hands on the wheel anyway. There was another reason why Luke wanted to go with Michael, even though he didn't want to admit this one out loud. He liked who he was around Michael, around the other boys too but especially when it was just the two of them. He didn't always like the person he turned into when it was just him and his parents, or him and Amber and his parents.  _"Why am I not surprised that your parents have a boat at a marina?"_  Luke smiled slightly, the tension seemingly broken between them and he laughed. "Once you've bought the swanky cars," he ran an affectionate hand over the dashboard of his baby, "A boat's the next best thing." Eventually, if you were rich enough like the family on  _Dynasty_ , you bought a plane. "You know I used to be in a sailing club," he blurted out, "Right out of an Abercrombie ad, I swear to God. Khakis and polo shirts. It was the worst." On the bright side, it meant that Michael would be totally safe with him. Luke was a great swimmer, honestly.

He turned the radio on low after a few more minutes, and the rest of the drive was good. It was easy to talk to Michael which distracted him from the stress of having to see his parents - and eventually they made it to the marina, where Luke showed his ID to the guard and pulled into the private lot next to it. "I brought an extra pair of shades if you need them," he said, unbuckling the seatbelt to reach into the back and grab his bag. "Shoes." His dad didn't let anyone wear their regular shoes onto the boat, so his whole family had shoes for boating - he figured Michael didn't have any, so he brought two pairs and hoped they were close enough in size that Michael could wear them. "Also... this." One of the travel bottles of SPF 30 sunscreen, "With your porcelain skin, I thought we should be prepared," he teased - he loved Michael's skin. Luke was tempted to offer to put the sunscreen  _on_  Michael, and if they were literally anywhere else, he would've tried but... this place just sucked. It was also crowded, and there was no way he was applying the sunscreen in the car (it'd grease up the seats).

Once he and Michael were out of the car and as ready as they were going to get, Luke led the way onto the dock until he saw his parents' yacht. Luke didn't want to tell Michael it was a yacht though, because it sounded pretentious. "That's it," he murmured to Michael, pointing it out, "And there's my mother." She was sitting at a table on the back of the boat, closest to the dock, with a glass of wine.  _"You aren't late."_  "Not this time," Luke forced a smile as he slipped off his sandals for the loafers before boarding the boat, and he turned to offer a hand to Michael so he could climb on too. By the time they were both on board, his mother had stood up to join them. Luke greeted her with a kiss on the cheek, then he did introductions, "I don't think you've met Michael. Michael, this is my mother. Mom, this is Michael."  _"Clifford, isn't it? You're one of the musicians Luke spends so much time with. I've heard about you."_  She already knew what his last name was, she was just rubbing it in that it wasn't a last name that ran in the same circles as Hemmings. Luke rolled his eyes from behind his sunglasses, trying not to grimace. "Yeah, he's in the band. He's the best guitarist in the state, but he's also on the dean's list. Tons of AP classes. How many are you taking?"

Luke knew it was stupid to ramble about school but he just wanted to make a point to his mom that the guys he hung around weren't just... you know, buskers and slackers. Michael was really, really smart. That would impress her much more than the guitar thing. Fuck. One minute in and Luke was wishing he had a drink. He wasn't even really listening to her, to see if she asked him any questions (or vice versa). "I'm gonna give Michael the tour, okay?" Luke pulled his bandmate along with him, not waiting for an answer.

 

 **MICHAEL:** “Are you serious?” Michael laughed. He couldn’t even lie to himself and say he couldn’t see that out of Luke because he damn well could. The sailing club thing, the Abercrombie type lifestyle. It all fit with the type of person Luke was supposed to be by his parents’ (and society's) standards. Luke was supposed to go off to an ivy league college and become a doctor or a lawyer. Not a musician. It honestly made him wonder what Luke was doing hanging out with him and Calum and Ashton. Michael didn’t think it was simply a rebellious phase because Luke loved music too much, he was too passionate about it. Michael witnessed that every time they performed together, but surely he could find people that were from his lifestyle to play with. He knew he shouldn’t question it because they couldn’t afford to lose Luke. The band was better with him. If only they could all get their personal shit straightened out. “Do you have pictures of that time in your life? I want to see ‘em.” Mostly so he had ammo to tease the shit out of Luke later.   
  
They got on the interstate and Michael felt himself relaxing the more he and Luke talked. He finished the coffee Luke had brought him and smiled to himself over the fact he was allowed to drink something in the car at all. Luke was particular about his vehicle. Michael would throw the cup away once they got to the marina. It was honestly too short of a ride for his liking and he felt nerves welling in his gut as they entered the parking lot and found a spot. Michael unbuckled his seat belt but he didn’t get out of the car as Luke mentioned extra sunglasses (Michael lost his last pair) and shoes. “Shoes?” he asked, blinking down at the black Converse he had on. They were pretty old but they were his favorite pair. Michael had fought with his mom about throwing them away, lamenting that they had character and fit him perfectly so why buy new ones? Luke handed him a pair of hideous boat shoes and Michael had to force down an incredulous laugh. Was he really supposed to wear these? With his black skinny jeans and Def Leppard band tee? This day was already heading towards disaster.   
  
Michael looked up when Luke showed him the sunscreen and rolled his eyes. “I happen to like my moon tan, thanks very much.” Though secretly, he was glad Luke had thought of it. Michael did burn easily and he would be miserable for days to follow if he didn’t wear sunscreen. “Thanks, but I just have to get this out...these shoes are ugly as fuck.” And he wasn’t sure they would even fit him. Oh well.   
  
Following Luke out of the car, he slipped the bottle of sunscreen into his back pocket for later use and followed his bandmate toward the boat. A boat that wasn’t actually a boat, Michael observed, but a yacht. Somehow, he had known that would be the case and he wasn’t surprised. It was something fancy and decadent and probably cost more than Michael’s entire house. Luke didn’t sound at all excited about his mother and when they approached the boat, Michael tried not to let his distaste for the loafers show on his face as he switched his Converse out for them. Yep, they looked ridiculous. Michael felt ridiculous. He didn’t say anything as he watched Luke greet his mother with a cheek kiss before introducing them. “Yes, Clifford. It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Hemmings,” he replied, taking her hand to shake it. It was the hand of someone who’d never worked a day in her life and Michael suddenly felt bad about his calloused fingers from playing guitar. He was quick to let her hand go.   
  
Michael’s eyes cut to Luke as his bandmate launched into a tangent about how Michael was in the band but he was also on the dean’s list at school and in AP classes. He shifted from foot to foot awkwardly and nodded. “Uh right...I’m in four AP classes. Nothing to really write home about, though.” Michael shrugged. He got it. Luke was trying to talk him up so his mom didn’t give him a hard time and Michael appreciated it. It was pretty clear Elizabeth Hemmings was probably not going to change her mind about Michael. As a socialite, she knew every family in Manassas, which meant she knew Michael’s family were barely middle class. He was relieved when Luke told his mother they were going on a tour of the boat.   
  
He gave Mrs. Hemmings an awkward smile and followed Luke off the deck and into the interior of the yacht, which was even more impressive. Once they were out of sight of Luke’s mom, Michael felt some of the tension release from both of them. “Tough crowd, huh?” he asked, teasing Luke gently. “I don’t think she’s my biggest fan.” Not that he truly cared. Michael just didn’t want to make this day difficult for Luke so he was going to be on his best behavior.   
  
“Hey,” he said softly, closing the distance between them. Michael took a quick look around to make sure they were alone for the moment before he took hold of Luke’s chin and drew him into a kiss. “Relax. I promise I’ll be good.” Michael grinned, tone suggestive and playful.

 

 **LUKE:** Luke didn't want to show Michael pictures from that time in his life - especially not if he'd pass them around to the other guys. "Shoes are for the boat, so you don't scuff it," Luke explained - and no explanation necessary for the sunscreen, he was sure Michael had a stock of it at home. He grinned when the other boy retorted that he liked his 'moon tan' because the truth was, Luke liked it too, and he couldn't argue with Michael about the shoes. "Yeah, I know." They completely sucked, and didn't really go with what either of them were wearing. Luke had toned down his usual clothes, no rips in the skinny jeans (his mom hated that) and a long-sleeved white shirt that was mostly buttoned. He guessed he should have told Michael to wear something other than a band shirt, but what was the point? This wasn't about changing Michael for his family, and it wouldn't matter what he wore. His name was still Clifford.

His mother was doing her Ice Queen thing which she was great at, making you feel really small with just a few words or a look - but Michael was holding his own. His mom couldn't say the guitarist wasn't polite. And when it came to school? Michael said all those AP classes weren't worth writing home about but Luke disagreed. "He's just being modest," he chimed in, but before his mother could think of something shitty to say, he escaped with the other boy to the cabin of the boat. It was all about strategically avoiding his parents, who would hopefully entertain each other without bothering them. The second they were out of sight of his mom, Luke felt like he could breathe. Michael was joking about it being a tough crowd which made Luke feel a little better (he wasn't taking it personally), and he gave a short, wry laugh in response. "She's not my biggest fan either, and I'm her kid so..." he shrugged with a small smile.

Luke glanced up when Michael spoke, just before the guitarist closed the distance between them. Michael took his chin in hand and kissed him, and the illicitness of kissing a guy on his parents' boat sent a thrill through Luke. It distracted him from how stressed out he was. Michael broke the kiss and told him to relax - which was easier said than done - but it made Luke smile. "It's not you I'm worried about," he murmured, grazing Michael's sides with his fingertips before leaning in for another kiss because he knew he'd hear his parents before he saw them. When the kiss was broken, it was with a playful tug of Michael's bottom lip between his teeth before he let the other boy go.

He knew he should've moved away from him but Luke didn't want to. He wanted to get every last second out of this. "I'll make it up to you," he promised softly, "In carnal favors or... whatever else you want." The thought of it made him grin, a proper grin, and then it faded with the realization that Michael got him better after one month than his girlfriend did in two years - especially when it came to his family. So what was he still doing with her? If he wasn't worried about what people would say... and that was assuming Michael would even be interested.  _"Luke?"_  He heard his father's footsteps before his voice, and he stepped away from Michael. His dad appeared a moment later on the threshold, and he barely acknowledged Michael at all.  _"Come on deck and help me take her out."_  "Yes sir," he agreed flatly, "Michael's never seen that before. He should come up too." He glanced to his bandmate and added, with no edge in his voice, "It'll be your first sailing lesson." His father finally acknowledged Michael, but he couldn't complain about the shoes because he had the right ones.  _"By all means."_  They all trooped back onto the deck, a happy trio, and Luke overheard his dad ask,  _"So Michael, what is it your parents do?"_  He guessed the question could be worse.

 

 **MICHAEL:**  Michael smiled when he felt the tension ease up in his lover, and it pleased him when Luke kissed him again instead of backing away from him. Michael really wanted to not care what people would think of them, what Luke’s parents would think of them, but it wasn’t the reality they lived in. They were still living in Virginia and Luke’s parents were still influential people who expected things of their son. It was a nice daydream though and a little exciting to be kissing Luke when he wasn’t supposed to be in a place they could potentially be caught. A soft giggle left Michael when Luke promised to make it up to him in ‘carnal favors’ or whatever he wanted. “I’m sure I can think of something you can do to make this whole thing worth my while,” he replied. Literally, it was hard not to think about finding a place on this fancy ass yacht so Luke could fuck him against a wall or something. Maybe they’d get the chance later. There had to be a place for that, right?   
  
Footsteps preceded the voice of someone Michael could only assume was Mr. Hemmings. Luke stepped away from him and Michael turned to see Andrew Hemmings come into the room, not sparing a glance at him. Not that it hurt Michael’s feelings. The less he had to talk to Luke’s parents the better. He was good with the whole idea of speaking only when being spoken to. Luke’s dad was requesting his help with taking the boat out and Michael had to keep himself from making a face at his bandmate when his name was thrown into the conversation. “Sounds like an adventure,” Michael said, hoping there wasn’t too much sarcasm in his tone. He wasn’t at all excited about the prospect of sailing. For all he knew, this could be what had him meeting his creator in the end. Michael hated the water so, so much.   
  
Following Luke and Mr. Hemmings up from the interior and onto the deck, he stayed out of the way while they worked, only stepping in when asked. It mystified Michael slightly that Luke seemed so natural like this, but he figured it was because Luke had been doing this sort of thing since he was a kid. He was brought out of his thoughts when Mr. Hemmings spoke to him, asking what his parents did for a living. A question Michael knew was coming. “My mom’s a nurse at Prince William and my dad’s a foreman at JC Roman in Richmond,” he answered. Michael felt a certain amount of anxiety grip his chest. Neither of his parents had white collar careers. He had to force himself not to finish the rest of his thought, which was the fact his dad had been laid off from his previous job because the rich council folk of Manassas had shut the company down. Michael was waiting for the response that would confirm for sure that he was an outsider.   
  
Michael really, really hoped they didn’t ask any more questions about his family or about the band. He felt like he’d be digging himself a hole he couldn’t get out of. Worse than that, he was afraid that maybe Luke would figure it out as well and realize that his parents were right and that would be the end of the band, and the two of them. Michael shifted uncomfortably in his spot, eyes coming up to Luke to see if his expression changed at all. So far, he didn’t see any dawning of realization and it eased his anxiety but only a little.

 

 **LUKE:**  Michael mused that he'd be able to think of  _something_  he could do to make today worthwhile and Luke pressed closer him, fingers teasing along the edge of Michael's jeans. "Yeah?" All he wanted to do right now was go down on Michael but that was definitely not happening at the moment. Luke pulled away from him before his dad saw them together, and the reason he suggested Michael come on deck with them was because it annoyed him that his bandmate was being ignored. Luke's strategy for dealing with Michael and his dad being in the same place was to talk Michael through what they were doing. "We're leaving the berth." Which was where you moor your boat by the dock. "First thing to do is to look at the wind and work out what it will do to your boat." It almost always pushed you back towards the dock which was the opposite of what you wanted. His dad kept the stern line on and drove forward on it gently and then Luke got rid of the bowline and the spring line, pointing them out as he did so, and Michael helped him with the stern line which was located right next to the helm. Then they drove the boat off.

It was as his dad was navigating slowly out of the marina with all the other boats that he asked Michael about his parents, and the other boy explained what they did. He didn't have to look at his dad to know what he was thinking, and he hoped he wouldn't say any of it.  _"And they are supportive of your music?"_  "Yeah," Michael didn't need Luke to answer for him, but they did seem supportive and it was one of the reasons the band liked to practice there a lot. "We play in their garage." Which he already knew because Luke had already told them.  _"I'm surprised they don't want you to pursue something more practical. The arts do not pay well."_  "They do if you're good at them," Luke muttered, loud enough to be heard over the wind coming off the water. His father ignored him.  _"I suppose we have higher expectations for our children - not to say anything about your parents, of course, Michael, but when you know better, you do better."_  And of course, Mr. Hemmings did not think poor people 'knew better', that they didn't try hard enough to improve their own circumstances, et cetera.  _"Dad,"_  Luke hissed.

Luke was so embarrassed that he turned bright red, and his father went on like he didn't notice his son's discomfort at all.  _"That is to say, if you're looking for a job, Michael, I'd be happy to put in a word for you. I know for a fact we could use better wait staff at the country club."_  His father didn't like that most of the staff were Hispanic and he complained about the fact that they 'didn't speak English' even though they did, and it was a hot fucking mess that Luke didn't want to talk about right now. So he said thanks to every version of God he could think of that it didn't come up - but Michael already had a job. Even if he didn't, he definitely wouldn't want to work there. "Dad, why don't you let me take over? I think Mom is... looking for a refill." On the  _other_  side of the boat. Now that they were out of the marina and on the open water, it was a lot easier to steer, and Luke knew how to do that. After adjusting the equipment and giving Luke the same strict rules he always did about keeping an eye on the depth, maintaining the correct speed, and turning into the waves so they didn't jostle the boat, his dad agreed to leave the boys to it. Almost as easy as a car.

The second he was out of earshot, Luke turned to Michael and said, "I'm sorry. He's in rare fucking form today." Still not as offensive as he could've been though, so there was that. Then it occurred to him that they were getting into deeper water, and technically everyone was supposed to wear a vest but no one did because they were ugly. Also, his whole family could swim. "You want a lifejacket? Might make you feel better." Not about being trapped on a boat with Luke's family, but about the water. "They're under the seat cushions over there." He gestured with a nod towards them.

 

 **MICHAEL:**  Even though Michael was attempting to pay attention to what Luke was telling him about the boat, nothing was actually sinking in. It wasn’t information he was going to need in the long run because he never planned to be out on a boat again. Michael felt his stomach churn faintly as they left the marina but it wasn’t enough to cancel out the anxiety over he was feeling because he’d explained what his parents did for a living. Michael ought not to have been surprised that Mr. Hemmings would ask about their music and whether or not his parents supported it. Luke answered before he got the chance and Michael closed his mouth. It was true, they did practice in Michael’s garage because his parents wanted him to live out his dreams. They wanted to let him choose his own path. Hell, his dad had even helped him install the portable A/C unit he, Ashton and Calum had all saved for last summer because the summer heat was awful. Suddenly, Michael was really starting to understand why Luke was the way he was. His parents were dicks. Straight up.   
  
Michael’s jaw tightened as Mr. Hemmings continued to speak, claiming they had higher expectations for their children because they knew better. Michael cleared his throat when Luke’s dad was done speaking and said, “Well, they seem to be doing a pretty okay job. My sister and I haven’t been arrested and we don’t get in trouble at school. We have decent grades as well.” He should have left well enough alone and just let the guy tout about his perfect parenting but Michael was bristled over the insinuation his parents were bad parents. They were the farthest thing from bad parents. He glanced at Luke who had turned a bright red color, either from embarrassment or anger and Michael couldn’t tell. Maybe a little of both. His defense of his parents didn’t seem to matter to Mr. Hemmings as he went on to talk about getting Michael a job at the country club they belonged to. “Thank you for the offer, Mr. Hemmings but I have to respectfully decline. I have a job and I like it a lot.” It didn’t matter what the job was. It could be slinging shit at walls and Michael would choose to do that over working for any place the Hemmings frequented.   
  
Luke stepped in, telling his dad he could take over and that his mother needed something. It seemed to work and a few moments later, Mr. Hemmings left their side of the dock. He was out of earshot and Luke apologized to him. “People make assumptions about me all the time,” he shrugged. “Your dad isn’t an exception to that. Don’t apologize.” It wasn’t Luke’s fault his father was a condescending bag of dicks. Michael wanted to move closer to Luke, wanted to touch him to ease the tension, whether his or Luke’s. This was a situation he didn’t want to be in, on a boat with Luke’s parents but he’d promised to stick it out and Michael didn’t want to go back on his word. In truth, he was a little afraid of touching Luke at all, afraid if they were caught it’d be taken the wrong way by the other occupants of the boat. So he stood where he was, hands in the pockets of his jeans, and shook his head at the offer of a life jacket. “I’m good. I’d rather avoid that embarrassment.” Michael shot him a small grin.   
  
*           *          *  
  
When Luke said it was just a few hours they’d be on the boat with his parents, Michael hadn’t expected that to mean all damn day. By the time they were back in the marina and the boat was safe enough to exit, Michael practically launched himself onto the dock. He ripped off the hideous boat shoes and pulled his beat up Converse back on, immediately feeling a little bit more like himself. When he checked his phone it was nearing six o’clock. They’d spend seven hours on a boat with Luke’s parents that consisted of awkward conversation and more jabs about the Cliffords’ social status in Manassas. Michael thought he’d taken it like a champ, defending his family and what they did when necessary but doing so respectfully so as not to get Luke in trouble later. The last thing he wanted was Luke to be banned from being part of the band. Still, he was grateful they were off the godforsaken boat and on solid land again.   
  
Michael turned to Luke, about to comment that they’d made it out of the lion’s den alive, when he heard a voice call Luke’s name from behind him. It was a voice all too familiar and Michael froze for a moment. When he turned around to confirm who the owner of the voice was, Michael groaned internally. Rob Evans was approaching them, followed by his band of tools and a few girls. All of them people Michael recognized from school. All of them he couldn’t stand and couldn’t stand him. The anxiety he’d felt at the beginning of the day, which hadn’t truly ebbed, flared back to life and he stepped back when they approached so as not to be noticed. It didn’t work as Michael accidentally made eye contact with one of them. “ _What’d you bring him here for, Luke?_ ” He was pretty sure the guy looking at him was one of the guys who used to like to shove him into the lockers. “You got a problem?” Michael asked, teeth grit faintly. He was done by 1000%. All day being lowkey ridiculed by Luke’s parents had his temper brimming beneath the surface. If this kid wanted to square up, let him. Michael would have no guilt over drowning him.

 

 **LUKE:** Luke was almost as eager to get off the boat as Michael was, because today had gone so much worse than he thought it would - he thought having Michael around meant his parents would back off. But the truth was, they spent the whole time making sure  _he_  knew how different he was from Michael. They didn't want to get to know him, not unless it was to make a better argument for why Luke should give up music and do something more with his life. He regretted bringing Michael on the boat and even though the guitarist handled all the Hemmings' jabs, Luke knew he couldn't be completely unaffected. It was hard to listen to that kind of shit for hours. The first thing he was going to do when they got back to the car and out of the parking lot was pull off the road and give Michael a blowjob, to show him how grateful and sorry Luke was for such a crap day.

Catching up with Michael once they were off the boat, he bumped shoulders with the other boy gently. They weren't even halfway to the car when he heard his name, and he turned around in surprise to see his friends. Luke raised a hand in greeting and he smiled, opening his mouth to ask what they were doing here - then Taz noticed Michael.  _"What'd you bring him here for, Luke?"_  The smile faded, and he glanced over at his bandmate when he retorted first, sounding pissed off (more so than he would be usually but it had been a long ass day). "No problem," Luke cut in, glancing between the two of them. "I brought him here because I felt like it." He didn't owe his friends an explanation, and he'd already explained that they were bandmates, and Michael was his guitarist, and they had to practice which was why he missed a lot of parties over the last month. Luke wasn't giving Michael up, and he wasn't giving their band up, so they could suck it.

Or stop being friends with him, but that meant losing out on all the perks of hanging out with a Hemmings. "What are you guys doing here?" Luke changed the subject in the hopes of distracting them from Michael. He wished he could touch Michael, but there was no way he could do that in public - he couldn't even really smile at him, his whole body language shifted. They were just bandmates. Friends, but not the same kind of friends as these guys.  _"It's Saturday night, dude."_  Right. This was a usual thing for his friends. "Did you bring any beer?" One of his friends chimed in that he did, and pointed in the direction of his Land Rover. "C'mon, let's get a drink," Luke suggested to Michael.

He led the other boy away from his friends and to the Land Rover, he was kind of looking for privacy so they could talk about what they were going to do now, if Michael would be willing to stay for an hour tops. Just long enough for his friends to get drunk enough they wouldn't notice the two of them dipping out, but they barely made it five feet before someone  _else_  said his name. "Fuck me,"Luke muttered under his breath, as soon as he heard her voice. It was Amber. He turned around and saw her walking towards him in a tiny white skirt and pumps, looking hot as hell (as usual). Luke was too surprised to react when she spoke to him with that little purr in her voice,  _"Hey baby."_

Amber slipped her arms over his shoulders and kissed him before he could figure out what the hell was going on.  _"I was hoping you'd come tonight."_  Luke stepped back, easing out from under her arms. "I thought you were going to D.C. this weekend." He definitely didn't think she'd be here - she was mad at him - and he wasn't thrilled with the change in plans.  _"I was but, you know, I left you messages. Were you ignoring me or something?"_  Not intentionally. "I was busy out on the water with my parents and... Michael?" He realized that his bandmate was walking away from him, from both of them, and he'd completely missed it. "Hold on," he said to his girlfriend, then called after the guitarist, "Michael!"  _"What the hell, Luke?"_  She wasn't happy about being ignored but he really didn't care right now. There was way too much shit going on. Luke caught up to Michael, and tugged the other boy to a stop with a hand on his shoulder. "Wait- where are you going?" He was confused.

 

 **MICHAEL:**  Letting out a breath, Michael’s hands curled into fists and his nails bit into the skin of his palms as he forced himself to keep his cool. If he decked this kid in front of all of his buddies, it was a fight that Michael wasn’t going to win. There were a lot of them and one of him. Luke stepped in, helping to diffuse the situation but not by much. His bandmate said he’d brought Michael because he felt like it, and even though that should have made Michael feel okay about it, the opposite happened. The change in Luke’s demeanor, the fact he had stopped even looking at Michael, made his chest tighten. A horrible feeling settled in the pit of his stomach and he felt like his flight or fight senses were kicking in, and Michael wanted to choose flight because that was easier. Michael swallowed the lump in his throat and when Luke suggested they get a drink, he nodded numbly. Beer wasn’t a choice drink for Michael but maybe a little bit of booze would ease the tension between him, Luke and all of Luke’s friends.   
  
They didn’t make it to the too expensive vehicle before another voice was calling out to Luke, and Michael whipped around to see Amber coming toward them. His stomach churned and for a brief moment, Michael wondered why in the hell a girl would dress the way Amber was dressed to hang out on a boat. Then again, he figured she wasn’t dressing to be practical and it was certainly getting attention. Michael rolled his eyes faintly as someone cat called her. Dudes were honestly gross. All of that; however, was forgotten as Michael watched Amber slide her arms around Luke and kiss him. It was like it was happening in slow motion and when it was over, Michael felt like he’d been punched in the gut. Jealousy blazed through him, white hot and like nothing he’d ever felt before. Michael grit his teeth and looked back and forth between the two of them, who had obviously forgotten he was standing there and that was enough for him. Michael wanted to -  _needed_  to - leave right now before he threw up on Amber’s Louboutins. So he turned and headed in the direction of the marina’s gate, and pulled out his phone to find the nearest place he could go and call Calum from.   
  
He heard Luke call his name, heard his bandmate approach him but he didn’t stop until a hand was on his shoulder and forced him to. “What?” he barked, turning to face Luke. Michael’s eyes couldn’t hide his anger and his embarrassment. God, how stupid was he really to think he and Luke could ever actually share anything real. Amber’s pink lipstick was smudged on Luke’s lower lip and Michael felt knots form in his stomach for the hundredth time that day. “You got lipstick on your mouth.” A sort of humorless smirk found its way onto Michael’s face as he watched Luke wipe away the makeup. How many times had he kissed those lips and never once thought about another person kissing them. A foolish thought really, childish as well because Michael was too sensitive for his own good. He was too in touch with his own emotions, his own heart and Michael thought he could protect himself. Michael wished he could be more like Ashton, who always made it seem easy to lock down how he felt and never let it out. But no, Michael wasn’t able to do that at all and it was costing him.   
  
“I’m going home,” he announced. “I don’t want to be here anymore. I didn’t want to be here in the first place. I came because you asked me to and now I’m regretting it so fucking much.” Surely Luke would understand that? Surely he would understand that Michael could only take so much in one day. Asking Michael to hang out with his jackass friends after hanging out with his jackass parents was overkill. “Go back to your friends and your girlfriend. I’m leaving.” Michael’s tone was firm but he felt anything but at the moment. He felt like he might crumble.

 

 **LUKE:**   _"What?"_  Luke blinked, wide eyed, at the harshness in Michael's voice - not because he didn't understand where it was coming from (he had an idea) but because Michael hadn't sounded like that with him in a long time, since he joined the band and they stopped hating each other so much. Michael looked so angry and it showed on his face, and before Luke could even figure out what to say now that he'd stopped the other boy, Michael told him he had lipstick on his mouth. Then it was Luke's turn to blush, and he wiped it away before glancing back up to meet Michael's gaze. "Michael..." Luke let go of his shoulder. Luke wanted to say he was sorry but he didn't know how to say it, and he was sharply aware of the fact that he couldn't really touch the other boy, not the way he wanted to. Not with Amber and half the soccer team watching from Rob's Land Rover.

Michael said he was going home - that he didn't want to be here, he never wanted to be here, and he'd only come in the first place because Luke asked and he regretted it. Luke couldn't even blame him for that. The day on the water had been terrible, his parents were complete dicks, and the last thing he wanted to see was  _Amber_. "I-I didn't know they'd be here," he protested in a low voice. "I'm sorry..." Having Amber and Michael in the same place at the same time was something Luke managed to avoid over the past month, it helped him ignore what he was trying to do, pull off being two different people. Michael told him to go back to his friends and his girlfriend, and Luke shook his head. "What are you gonna do? Walk? I'm gonna give you a ride, okay?"

Luke was already starting to fish his keys out of his back pocket when he heard Amber's voice ring out over the parking lot as she strode towards him- them.  _"Luke, are you leaving?"_  Luke was afraid if he turned back to her, his bandmate would walk off again. "Michael needs a ride." That was about the only explanation he gave, and he could hear the scoff in her voice.  _"Doesn't he have any other friends? Or is mooching off of you all he's good at?"_  That earned her a glare. Luke really wanted to tell her to shut the fuck up, but then she'd cause a big fucking scene in front of everyone - and meanwhile, what would Michael be doing? "C'mon," he attempted to convince Michael, voice even but eyes desperate for him to agree so they could talk. "It's not a big deal. I drove you, I can take you home."

 

 **MICHAEL:**  Michael did believe that Luke was telling the truth about his friends showing up, that he didn’t know they would because he didn’t think Luke would intentionally put either of them in such an awkward situation. But they  _were_  here and Luke was going to have to act accordingly. Luke was going to have to pretend that nothing else was between them other than them being bandmates, and while Michael knew it shouldn’t hurt him it did. Just one more thing he thought he could handle that he couldn’t. Michael couldn’t figure out how Luke kept the lies straight with Amber, or how something hadn’t slipped so far. He supposed it was because Luke was a good liar or at least good at twisting the truth. Michael felt something creep beneath his skin that he didn’t want to recognize as total humiliation for the shit he’d gotten involved with. He really, really wished that day at the carnival hadn’t happened at all.   
  
“I don’t want a ride,” Michael retorted, taking a step back away from Luke to get his point across. “I’ll walk to the nearest convenience store and call someone to come get me. It’s only a mile away.” Michael couldn’t be in such a small space with his bandmate at the moment. Not with the way he was feeling, the anger that he felt. Michael needed space but Luke was persistent. At least until he was distracted by Amber calling out to him, asking if he was leaving as she came toward them. Michael’s eyes snapped up to the girl when she asked if he was mooching and a bark of laughter, humorless, incredulous, came out of him. “Are you fucking serious right now? What kind of bullshit are you trying to project because I’m not the one that follows a Hemmings around like a lost puppy-” He cut himself off before he could say something truly offensive to her. Michael felt only vaguely smug that his words caused Amber to storm off. He turned on Luke once more and when he opened his mouth, he couldn’t stop the flood or words that came pouring out.   
  
“I don’t want your help. I don’t want anything from you, okay?” Michael’s throat felt tight, like any moment he could burst into tears. He had to grit his teeth to chase back the burn at the back of his eyes. “This...this thing between us,” he gestured between the two of them, “it can’t happen anymore. I don’t want this.” Michael’s words trembled faintly because of how hard they were for him to actually speak. None of it was true. He  _did_  want Luke. Michael wanted him more than anything in the world but he was selfish enough to want all of Luke, not just part of him. All of Luke was not something he could have because of who they were as people. “We’re not the same, Luke. You know it...I know it...everyone in the fucking world knows it so what is the point of pretending we are? And this...double life you’re leading...how do you keep up with it?” He paused so he could look over his shoulder at Luke’s girlfriend, who had joined his group of friends again, likely slandering him for the millionth time since middle school. “How do you think they would react if they knew you were fucking me? How do you think your  _parents_  would react?” he asked, his voice low so they wouldn’t overhear. When Michael turned his eyes back to Luke, it was with less anger now and more weariness. He was tired of this bullshit game.   
  
Michael gripped the straps of his backpack over his shoulders for lack of anything better to do with his hands and shook his head. There was a choice that had to be made and Michael felt like it was up to him to make it. “I don’t want to be part of your world, Luke. I don’t want  _you_ ,” he lied. “Just please...leave me alone…” Michael hoped Luke would do as he asked and not come after him again. He turned around and walked away for the second time, drawing in a shaky breath, and when he didn’t hear Luke follow him Michael didn’t look back.

 

 **LUKE:**  Michael said he didn't want a ride, that he could walk to a convenience store and call for a ride - but that seemed stupid to Luke. One, those types of places were where serial killers hung out in the movies and two, it wasn't a big deal for him to give his bandmate a ride. Luke was looking for the chance for them to have some one-on-one time after the shitty day they'd spent on the boat. It would give him a chance to smooth things over with Michael. He didn't have a chance to argue before Amber showed up behind him, and instead of ignoring her Michael shot back that she followed Luke around like a puppy (because of his last name, not because of who he was). Luke knew there was some truth to that, so he didn't exactly jump to his girlfriend's defense, especially after the stupid shit she said. That only seemed to piss her off more, but at least when she stormed off it was out of earshot of them both.

When Luke tried to persuade Michael again to let him drive, the guitarist retorted that he didn't want his help, or anything from him. Luke knew that he was mad but this was stupid. Michael already knew what kinds of people his parents were and Amber, and none of it had been a dealbreaker before. So he didn't understand why Michael was telling him that this couldn't happen anymore, that he didn't want  _this_. "Are you  _serious?_ " One day with his family was all it took to change his mind about them? Six hours ago they were still making plans to do shit once they got away from his parents, the boat. Michael had  _kissed_  him.

 _"We're not the same, Luke."_  "Michael..." The other boy spoke over him and he didn't really have the words yet - just the protest, because they'd always been different. So what? Who the fuck cared?  _Luke_  didn't care. He loved it. He loved being in the band, being with Michael, being with people who weren't just hanging out with him because of his name, who weren't using him because of how rich his parents were. Things weren't perfect, and it was hard to switch between the Luke who dated Amber and the Luke who wanted to be with Michael, but this last month had been fucking amazing and he thought he made Michael happy too. "Is that what you want? You want to tell them?" No. Michael didn't want everyone to know they were fucking, which made sense because that was  _his_  rule, not Luke's.

"You said you could deal with this," he reminded Michael reproachfully, his own voice shaking slightly with... anger, maybe, or the will not to cry because he didn't think he'd ever been broken up with before. If that's what this was, it fucking  _hurt._ It felt like the rules had changed but Michael never told him, and it wasn't fair. But there was nothing he could say when his bandmate said he didn't want to be part of Luke's world, that he didn't want Luke, that he just wanted Luke to leave him alone. Luke took a step back like Michael had punched him in the face, and this time he didn't follow him when he walked away. Instead he just stood there in the parking lot for God knows how long, until he heard someone on the dock calling his name.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Calum comes to the rescue after Michael leaves Luke behind at the marina.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MALUM BROMANCE AHOY! I love Malum's friendship because it's so pure and Ayo and I wanted to reflect that in this chapter. We hope you love it. <3

**CALUM:**  Cal was a little bummed because Ashton was busy tonight (he had to babysit his siblings) so he couldn't hang out, and Lucy was out of town. She was visiting her grandfather in Dale City until Sunday night. Nobody was on the server for Fortnite. So he was playing Guitar Hero with his mom and she was kicking his ass during "Hit Me With Your Best Shot" which was embarrassing. He heard his phone buzz but didn't check it until after the song was over. "It's Michael,"he explained to his mom with a grin, which faded as soon as he read the message. "I gotta go." Calum explained to her why; Michael texted that he was stuck at a 7-Eleven in Woodbridge with no ride home, and he wanted Cal to come get him. He grabbed his mom's car keys and texted back that he was on his way. Calum texted Michael to ask what the hell he was doing over there but he didn't reply.

It took him twenty-five minutes to get there because it was post-rush hour so he could speed a little, and he noticed his best friend's bright red hair under the fluorescent lighting of the gas station first. Calum pulled in past the fill-up stations and waved at Michael as he pulled up. A few seconds later, Michael was in the car and buckled him. Calum gave him a once over to make sure he was okay (he looked okay) and for a couple minutes he didn't say anything. He was kind of hoping Michael would explain what the heck was going on first, but when he didn't, Calum decided to break the silence.

"Want to tell me what you're doing all the way out here?" he asked finally, glancing between Michael in the passenger seat and the dashboard. Calum was worried. "Are you okay?"

 

 **MICHAEL:** Michael was shaking from trying to hold back the anger and the sadness, the tears that stung the back of his eyes because he felt so stupid. It was stupid to agree to spend the day with Luke’s parents, and even more stupid to think for a moment they could be...anything. Today was a reminder of how vastly different Michael and Luke really were. Michael had convinced himself he could handle whatever bullshit came his way because Luke was just someone he was sleeping with, just a member of his band, and it was clear he’d never been more wrong about anything in his life. Michael couldn’t handle any of it, and he really couldn’t handle watching Amber kiss Luke the way she did. This wasn’t going to work; not them, not Luke being in the band, none of it. Michael had known that from the start, he’d told Calum and Ashton it was a bad idea because Luke wasn’t like them. They hadn’t listened and part of Michael really wanted to blame his two best friends for his breaking heart even if it was his own actions that had brought him to this point. And the things he’d said to Luke just before he took off...they were things he couldn’t take back.   
  
A frustrated sound left Michael as he pressed the heels of his palms into his eyes to stop the tears. He’d reached the 7-Eleven in Woodbridge and called Calum already to come pick him up. Michael hadn’t explained anything and he wasn’t sure that he wanted to. At the core of this, Michael was embarrassed over his actions and the way he had handled this entire situation so poorly. He had no right to be this upset, no right to feel so horrible when he could have stopped this before it even started. Michael could have told Luke not to touch him or kiss him or that he didn’t want to sleep with him. If he’d been a stronger person, everything might be okay but he’d been weak. Now everything was royally fucked up and it was his fault. How was Michael going to explain to Calum and Ashton that he’d basically ruined everything they’d worked so hard for over the past year and a half?   
  
The gas station was quiet, mostly empty for the moment so Michael heard Calum’s mom’s car and looked up to see his friend pulling in. Michael swiped at the few frustrated tears that escaped hurriedly and got in the car when Calum stopped. He buckled in and they left the parking lot, silence filling the space between them. Michael stared out the windshield, becoming momentarily lost in the headlights that passed them on the opposite side of the road when Calum spoke, asking him if he was alright. “I’m fine,” he murmured. They weren’t that far from Manassas but Michael didn’t think Cal was going to let him not talk. “I did something stupid and agreed to go with Luke out on his parents’ boat. It was fucking miserable.” It was weird how it felt like the Hemmings had gotten in his head, and how he’d started to feel ashamed of his parents and their life. Michael assumed this was the kind of gaslighting bullshit they used on Luke as well.

 

 **CALUM:** Mikey said he was fine and it was hard to tell in the dark interior of the car, and from glances back and forth, if that was true - but Calum bet it wasn't. Just call it years of being friends with him. He knew better than to think Michael just texted him to shoot the shit on a drive back from Woodbridge. His friend filled the silence before he had to ask: he explained that the reason he was all the way out here was because he got on a boat with Luke's parents.

"What?" Calum laughed a little - not because it was funny, just out of incredulity, "Mikey, you can't swim. You don't even like the water." At least, from as far back as Cal could remember, that's the way it was. Why would Michael ever agree to get on a boat, especially with the Hemmings? "That sounds terrible. His parents seem like assholes, and I've never actually talked to them." He doubted they would talk to him - but you could tell a lot by interviews, and the way someone talked, whether or not they'd be down to earth and cool. Luke's parents weren't. If it wasn't for Luke's spoiled streak - which had toned down a little bit in the past month - Calum would have thought he was a pod person, not a Hemmings. He really didn't fit their aesthetic. Neither did Michael. "Bet they loved you bringing Def Leppard on their fancy boat," he teased the guitarist gently, nodding to his shirt, but sobered immediately after the joke. Now probably wasn't the time. "I'm sorry you had a bad time. Did Luke ditch you at the 7-Eleven?" Because  _that_  would be a dick move, and the thought of it honestly pissed him off.

Especially since things seemed to be going so much better between them. Luke and Michael liked each other. At practice, it was always fun and they were always messing with each other and touching each other and it was kind of... Cal wasn't sure, it felt... flirty. The fact that Luke had a girlfriend didn't make it less flirty. "You and Luke have been getting pretty close lately," he pointed out quietly, asking a question without asking  _the_  question. "Want to talk about... that?"

 

 **MICHAEL:** “Tell me something I don’t know,” Michael responded, not just about the fact he couldn’t swim but also the fact Luke’s parents were dicks. He had always known that about them but it had never been from firsthand experience. Now that it was, Michael was more sure than ever they were people he never wanted to be associated with. He just didn’t know if that meant indirectly as well because of Luke. Michael sighed softly and glanced to his friend in the driver’s seat. “No, he didn’t ditch me at the gas station. I walked their from the marina.” Part of him didn’t want to rehash what happened between himself and Luke, and the other part wanted to cry on Calum’s shoulder. He couldn’t do that right now because they were in a moving vehicle. For a moment, he’d forgotten just how observant Calum could be, so when he brought up how close Michael and Luke had gotten over the past month, he let his head fall back against the seat and closed his eyes. “Can we go to the ATV trails? I don’t want to go home yet. I’ll tell you what happened. Promise.”

Calum agreed and it was only about fifteen minutes later they were back in Manassas and headed through the trees and into the clearing, complete with track marks from four wheeling. It was too late for anyone to be out and Michael got out of the car, leaving his backpack on the floorboard, and breathing in the night air. He felt considerably calmer than he had an hour ago. “Come sit with me.” Michael gestured for Calum to sit with him on the hood of the car, which was still warm from the drive. The headlights illuminated the area around them enough to see one another and Michael lay back against the windshield, eyes on the stars that could be seen above them. “I fucked up, Cal…” he murmured softly. This was potentially going to be an awkward conversation. Michael wasn’t someone who kept secrets because for the most part, he didn’t have any. Not really. Luke was his biggest secret ever and he’d kept it for a month. Calum had joined him on the hood and he turned his head so he could see his friend. “Like really fucked up. I don’t know if it’s something that can be fixed either. I wouldn’t...I don’t think it can…”

Michael realized he was being cryptic and he bit down on his lower lip as he attempted to organize his thoughts. Maybe, just maybe he would feel better if Calum knew the truth. Maybe it would lift some of the weight off his chest. “After the gig in Arlington, I was walking home from work and cut through here to get home quicker and Luke was here. He was out here alone, drunk as hell, so I took him home and sobered him up. He stayed the night at my house and went home the next morning.” Michael left out the part about how Luke had drunkenly kissed him. “Left my backpack in his car and he brought it back to me and we...I kissed him...in my kitchen.” The abridged version, of course because Michael was fairly certain Calum didn’t want to hear all the in depth details of their little hookup in the kitchen. Michael winced even as he heard himself admitting to any of this and he looked away from Calum, afraid of what he might see in his friend’s face. He didn’t think he could bare for Calum to be disappointed in him. “And that day I skipped school? Yeah, I skipped with Luke and we went back to his house and...uh God...this is where I got really stupid.” Michael brought his hands up to cover his face before he continued. “We fucked...twice…”

 

 **CALUM:**  Michael wanted to go to the ATV trails instead of back to his house, which Calum agreed to because the weather was okay - and he wanted to hear what had happened between his best friend and Luke. Pulling into a clearing criss-crossed with four wheel tracks, he left the lights on, tucked the keys in his pocket, and got out when Michael did. The guitarist sat on the hood on the car and gestured for him to do the same - it was still warm - so he did. Cal lay down on his back next to Michael, shoulders touching, and he blinked up at the sky. It had been a really long time since he did something like this, and he glanced over to Michael when the other boy admitted that he fucked up. Whatever it was must've been big because Michael could barely spit the words out, about how he'd fucked up so bad he didn't think it could be fixed. "What did you do?" Calum asked softly.

It was hard for him to imagine Michael doing something so bad there was no way to make it right, and he reached for his friend's hand, squeezing it tightly, encouraging him to keep talking before letting go. Michael explained that after the gig in Arlington, he'd found Luke wasted and took care of him - and that the two kissed. Calum's eyebrows shot up but he didn't say anything. It was pretty unusual for Michael to want to skip school, so he remembered that day; but he couldn't pretend to be chill about this. "You did?" he shifted on the hood of the car to look at Michael. The two of them, Michael and Luke, had sex. Twice. Calum had only had sex with one person, Lucy, but he'd never done it twice in a row before. After the first time, he was pretty wiped out.

The only person he ever came more than once with was Ashton, and they didn't even have sex. But Calum always figured that was just because Ashton was... different, he'd always be different from anyone else Calum dated. "That explains a lot," he replied finally, leaning back on the windshield, "I was definitely getting a... vibe from you two, but I wasn't sure about Luke." Even though it made sense in retrospect and he was the last person who should judge someone based on how many girlfriends they'd had. "That doesn't sound like a fuck up," he pointed out gently, looking at the other boy. It wasn't like he killed somebody. "What happened tonight? Were you... dating or fooling around?"

 

 **MICHAEL:**   _That explains a lot._  Michael wasn’t sure he liked that answer because it meant he and Luke weren’t being as subtle as he thought they were. If Calum was getting ‘vibes’ off the two of them then who else was getting them? Michael shuddered, not wanting to think about who else might suspect he and Luke had been fooling around. He also reminded himself that Calum and Ashton spent the most time with them together so it made more sense for them to notice things. When they were at school or in public, Luke and Michael didn’t act like a couple because it was part of the ground rules. Rules that Michael had come up with and now realized what a stupid idea that had been. Were rules not made to be broken? He wasn’t sure why he ever thought he could live his life, control his heart, by a contract. Michael knew better, and that had just been about wishful thinking and trying so hard to protect himself. In the end, it still ended up hurting because the look on Luke’s face tonight when Michael had told him he didn’t want him had been horrible. He never wanted to see Luke look like that again.   
  
Uncovering his face, Michael shook his head. “No, definitely not dating. That same afternoon I told him there had to be ground rules. Mostly that no one was to know and we weren’t a couple. You know how this town is and what kind of bullshit would happen if anyone knew what was up.” Of all of them, Calum had probably gotten the most bullshit because he wasn’t a white kid. Michael sighed softly. “It was just supposed to be about sex. There wasn’t...I wasn’t supposed to actually…” He trailed off because he couldn’t bring himself to admit, even now, that he had feelings for Luke. Not just feelings, that he was in love with Luke and wanted to be with him. Just the two of them. What was the point of admitting it now? Michael had broken up with Luke in a sense. He’d said awful things he couldn’t take back so it wouldn’t be a surprise to him if Luke wanted nothing to do with him ever again. It also left the band in a predicament but that was something they could think about later. They didn’t have another gig for a month and even if Luke quit, they could still carry on as a trio like they’d been doing before.   
  
“It doesn’t matter,” he said, with some finality. “I told him it wasn’t happening anymore and that I didn’t want to keep sleeping with him.” Michael shrugged, like it was no big deal even though his heart felt like it was shattered. He didn’t expect anything from Luke, and certainly not for Luke to give up his life and all the benefits of being a Hemmings just for him. Michael assumed Luke would go on with his life, continue to date Amber, or not. He didn’t know. It wasn’t really his business. “Guess we’ll have to figure out what’s going to happen with the band but...whatever does happen, we’ll figure it out. We can talk about that later.”   
  
Sitting up a bit, Michael turned so he could face his friend better and pursed his lips in thought. He wanted to change the subject and there were things he wanted to know, like why Ashton had been so distant and how things were going with Calum’s girlfriend. “Is shit okay with you and Ash? He seems kinda elusive lately.” An understatement. Michael had tried not to really overthink it, telling himself that it could just be a matter of Ashton not wanting to feel like a third wheel. That made sense, right? Especially when Michael had been kind of a crappy friend as well since he’d been so wrapped up in Luke. Michael needed to call Ashton and ask him to hang out soon.

 

 **CALUM:** Ground rules. In theory that sounded like a good idea, but Calum didn't think Michael was the kind of person who could stick with ground rules, not in relationships. He seemed prickly on the outside but it was just a defense mechanism because he was soft on the inside. Calum loved that about Michael, but people could be real dicks. "Right..." Manassas was not the kind of place he wanted to come out in either, he thought it might cause more problems for his parents. Michael trailed off short of admitting he had feelings for Luke, but Cal could read between those lines, and his best friend wasn't particularly convincing when he added that it didn't matter because whatever it was, it was all over now.

"You know there's nothing wrong with not being into casual sex," he mused after a couple seconds of silence, "I'm not." That's why he knew he couldn't sleep with Ashton, no matter how much he wanted to - because it was never be 'just sex' to Calum, and he couldn't handle it. "It's okay if it matters. It sounds... intense." He bet that it hurt a lot. "I'm really sorry, Mikey. I know it sucks right now." Even if he didn't know exactly what his friend was going through, he'd been through something similar. "Sucks when you can't be with someone even though a part of you really wants to, because you know it's not good for you." That's what Calum went through before he made the decision to date Lucy exclusively. He loved Ashton so much, but being with him like that was hard. Knowing that they couldn't be out in public, that Ashton was ashamed, that no one would understand, and that all the good stuff wasn't enough to make up for how bad it made him feel.

Calum hadn't even thought about what that would mean for the band - but if Luke's and Michael's non-break up was so bad that Michael didn't think Luke was going to come back, well shit, that did suck. Calum figured pointing that out wasn't going to help anything, so he let it go. Michael changed the subject and normally he'd be cool with hat - but his expression faltered at the mention of Ashton's name. If Michael had noticed it too, that meant that Calum was just kidding himself, wanting to believe that those excuses were legit, that Ashton wasn't avoiding him. Now it was pretty obvious that he was. "It's okay. It's... complicated, I guess. I thought it would be less complicated once I started dating Lucy but..."

He didn't have the nerve to ask Ashton, because he didn't want the drummer to shrug it off again. "I don't know if I can tell you," Cal confessed softly, the words painfully low, "It's not that I don't trust you, but Ash... he wouldn't want anyone to know. He's not like us, you know? His family-" Calum trailed off.

 

 **MICHAEL:**  Yes, Michael did know there was nothing wrong with not being into casual sex and he smiled faintly when Calum explained that he wasn’t into it either. Casual sex wasn’t something Michael would shame anyone for because who the hell was he to tell another person how to live? But Michael knew he was too emotional to handle it. The rough exterior and the overall ‘fuck you’ demeanor that he put forth was a way to keep himself protected. Michael could handle not sleeping with Luke because he knew he would eventually get over it, but what he couldn’t handle was actually falling in love with Luke and having his heart broken later. Michael was worried that he was already halfway there so it was better to call it quits now. Calum reminded him that it was also okay for it to matter and that it sucked when you couldn’t be with someone knowing it was bad for you. Michael thought Calum wasn’t just talking about him and Luke anymore.   
  
Michael stayed silent as Calum explained that things between him and Ashton had gotten complicated since Lucy had come into the picture. Michael had met her and she seemed nice enough, cute and sweet and exactly someone that Cal would be into. Lucy didn’t spend much time around them as a group because most of their time together consisted of band practice, in which there was a strict ‘no girlfriends allowed’ rule to keep distractions at a minimum. Michael hadn’t really enforced that rule until after Luke had joined the band because he didn’t want Amber to think she could just show up whenever she wanted. Michael frowned at Calum’s confession but he nodded, unwilling to push his friend to tell him anything he wasn’t comfortable with. “Like us? You mean with parents that don’t give a shit if we’re queer?” he asked with a faint smile. Michael had always sort of known that Calum wasn’t straight but it wasn’t honestly a conversation they’d had. He just hadn’t been sure if Calum’s experience had included Ashton or not. “It’s okay, Cal.”   
  
Biting down on his lower lip for a moment, Michael let silence fill the space between them for a few minutes before he spoke again, his curiosity getting the best of him. “Do you like...I don’t know...like Ashton or do you like Lucy now?” Michael was a little confused. When Calum and Lucy were together, he seemed to like her a lot but liking someone wasn’t necessarily mutually exclusive with romantic feelings. Michael realized, suddenly, what an absolute fucking mess the four of them were. How the hell were they ever going to get anywhere musically when they couldn’t get their personal shit together? Michael frowned faintly, and he thought that maybe he’d fucked up more than he realized.

 

 **CALUM:**  Michael guessed exactly what he meant, and it made Calum feel a little better - like maybe he wasn't betraying Ashton as long as he didn't  _say_  the words. How could he say them when Ashton himself couldn't even admit it? "Yeah," he whispered with a small smile, "I'm queer." It was the first time Cal had said it out loud, and he breathed a short sigh of relief as soon as he did. Michael probably already knew but now he could say he'd officially come out to someone - and it was his best friend. One of them, the one he trusted most with something like this. "I've been thinking about telling my parents, but it doesn't seem like such a big deal now that I'm dating a girl." So maybe if he dated a boy sometime in the future, then he could tell them about it. He wasn't exactly nervous about telling them because, like Michael said, their families wouldn't care either way. Cal was confident his parents and his sister would love him exactly as much as they did now, no matter how he identified. He just didn't want to make things harder on them. His family was cool but Manassas was definitely  _not_.

Michael said it was okay that Calum couldn't tell him everything, and he was really grateful for his friend. He smiled at the other boy. Maybe someday Ashton could tell Michael himself but Calum wasn't sure when that would happen (if it would happen). Silence filled the air between them but it wasn't uncomfortable, not for Calum, not until Michael asked him the question about who he liked. He wasn't totally sure how to respond because 'like' didn't seem to fit all the intense feelings he had for Ashton, and everything they did.

But one thing  _was_  for certain. "I like Lucy," Calum said firmly. "She's awesome. She really wants to be with me, just me, and that's... different from the... thing I had with Ash. He might never come out, Mikey," he said sadly, and it wasn't really about  _him_  wanting to be with Ashton, it was about how much of a burden that was for the drummer. "I wish things were different for him, for all of us. That's why getting out of Manassas is such a big deal, you know? It's not just about the music, it's... about going somewhere where we don't have to pretend to be something we're not." It would be a lot better for all of them, but he was getting off topic, and there was one thing he really wanted to say, and admitting it to Michael was as good as admitting to himself because he knew Michael wouldn't tell anyone.

"I love Ashton," he said - and it was a different kind of love than he had for Mikey or even Luke. "But he doesn't love himself, so there's no room for me." Or for anyone. Until Ashton came to terms with himself, all of himself, he wasn't... he couldn't be expected to give those things that people looked for in relationships. "I'm getting over it," he assured his friend with a shrug, "It's just... I don't know."

 

 **MICHAEL:**  Michael smiled faintly when Calum said he’d been thinking about telling his parents and he nudged his friend gently. “You’ll know when you’re ready,” he said softly. Michael’s parents knew he was gay, they had since last summer but they had been supportive and loving, and he knew they always would be. It had been a difficult thing to admit to them and even though they were the important people to tell, Michael still had no desire for anyone else to know the truth. Teenagers were cruel and the last thing he wanted was for any of them to have more fodder against him. The bullying had eased up since Luke joined the band, which is something Michael could say was something he’d done but that didn’t mean a damn thing. There was only so much Luke had control over when it came to his social circle. It was best to keep it between the few people he could trust. “There’s no rush.”   
  
It was disheartening to see Calum seem so down about this, even as he was confirming that he did like Lucy and that he did want to date her. Michael didn’t think Ashton was ever going to come out either, if that was in fact what was going on, and certainly not while they were bound to Manassas. Calum shouldn’t have to wait for Ashton to get his shit together. “If you like her and she likes you then that’s all that matters, right? You two are really cute together and she seems nice.” Michael did hope that if Calum brought Lucy along to their next gig it didn’t make things too awkward. He blew out a breath as Calum talked about the secondary reason they all wanted to get the hell out of Virginia. “I know...we’ll get there as long as we keep working together.” Which also meant Michael was going to have to figure out how to get along with Luke after what happened between them.   
  
Looking down at the ground, Michael nodded to let Calum know he was listening. There was a twinge in his chest when Calum confessed to loving Ashton but there not being room for him in Ashton’s heart. It was more true than anyone would ever really want to admit. It didn’t just make Michael sad for Calum, but for Ashton as well. “You don’t have to try and explain it, Cal.” Michael understood that it was complicated.   
  
A laugh left him then, somewhat humorless and he looked up at Calum. “Fuck, all of this would have been so much easier if you and I had just gotten together. Then we wouldn’t have had to deal with their bullshit.” Michael had never really thought about it before. Calum had always just been his friend and there had never been attraction between them, or romantic feelings. Not that Michael didn’t think Calum was attractive because he did. It had just never occurred to him. “Maybe we ought to try kissing and see if there’s a ‘spark’,” he half joked, and made air quotations with his fingers.

 

 **CALUM:**  Calum knew that Michael was right; there'd be a right time to tell them the truth about himself, and there wasn't a rush to do so. "I feel better just telling you," he admitted with a small smile, "It's good practice." Despite what he and Ashton had done together, they never talked about it or what it meant  _for_  them, and then after they stopped because things got serious with Lucy, Calum felt the change in their friendship. He didn't want to admit it, and it didn't get really noticeable until after Ashton found out about him and Lucy having sex (Calum was not thrilled she told her friends about it - because he hadn't told anyone, and if he was going to tell anyone, it wouldn't be Ashton). They hadn't talked, not really, or hung out since that happened and Calum couldn't help but feel like it was his fault. The worst part was that he didn't know how to fix it because he didn't know what Ashton wanted.

Well, maybe he knew a little bit about what Ashton wanted - but Calum didn't want to go back to the way things were before. He was tired of only getting to touch and be touched behind closed doors, and everything was different with Lucy. "I'm really glad you like her," he admitted to Michael. It meant a lot to him that his bandmate supported him - them, him and Lucy, and that he thought they were cute and she was nice. "She's really great." She  _was_  nice, and funny, and smart, and super chill about all the time he spent with the band, working on his music. He wasn't in love with her or anything, but he was really happy with her. When he was with her, he didn't think about Ashton as much.

What he wanted for the drummer - even though he couldn't be with him - was the same thing he wanted for the band: for them to get out of Manassas, it would make everything better. He and Mikey would get away from the shitty people who picked on them, Ashton would get away from his parents... Luke too, since it sounded like they were crappy. Assuming Luke stuck with the band. Calum was a little worried about their chances as a trio, but he also knew he couldn't ask either of them - Michael or Luke - to suck it up if it didn't make them happy. That kind of drama could screw up the band even more so... he told himself he wouldn't worry about it right now. It would all shake out by the next performance, Calum was sure. He hoped things got better for him and Ashton, too, so they could be best friends again.

Michael pointed out that things would've been a lot easier if  _they_  were a couple instead of getting hung up on guys with way too much baggage (who were mostly unavailable, in the emotional sense of the word). "Yeah, can you imagine? It'd be so... easy." A relationship with Michael, they'd probably never fight and they liked all the same stuff, wanted the same things from their partners (or so Cal thought). So when Michael joked that they should kiss and see if there's a spark, the bassist gave his friend a considering look. "Let's try it." Cal figured that Lucy would give him a pass for this (not that he intended to tell her - but it didn't really feel like cheating). Cal's touch was tentative, nervous, when he reached for Michael, skimming his fingers along his friend's face to his hair. He brought his mouth to meet Michael's, lips touching, and he closed his eyes for a few seconds. It was a good kiss, Michael's mouth was warm and soft, but Cal didn't feel that squirming stomach flip, the rush of heat, that he felt with Ashton (or to a lesser extent, with Lucy). So when the kiss was broken, he laughed a little, feeling shy, and glanced into Michael's eyes. "It was good, I just..." he shrugged, "No spark. You?"

 

 **MICHAEL:**  The protest was on Michael’s lips, to tell Calum that he hadn’t really been serious and that he probably shouldn’t kiss someone when he had a girlfriend (because that wasn’t at all hypocritical) but he never got the chance. Calum touched his face and drew him in, pressing a kiss to his mouth that was warm and soft and...not at all exciting. Part of Michael was a little disappointed about that because it absolutely would have made things easier. There wasn’t the heart flutter he felt when he was with Luke, or the way his chest warmed up. Calum didn’t take his breath away like Luke did and when it was broken and he saw his friend blush, Michael laughed softly and a little bit nervously. “Yeah, it was okay but...no, no spark…” That was a rather huge confirmation that he and Calum did not have any sort of romantic feelings for each other and yet they had the same problem; they had feelings for douchebags. “Probably best not to tell anyone about this, yeah? I don’t want to cause any more problems and I don’t want Lucy to be upset about it.” Granted, Michael didn’t think it was that big of a deal since it was just a little kiss and it was tongueless.

Michael brought his hands up and scrubbed them over his face, letting out a faint groan of frustration. This wasn’t something he ever thought he’d have to deal with, something he could never have seen coming in a million years. When Michael and Luke hated each other, it had been easier to navigate because they knew that path and stayed the course, but this was uncharted territory. Michael felt like he was moving through it blindly and not always dodging the dangers of the terrain. Being with Luke was like falling but knowing there was a net to catch you at the bottom, thrilling and frightening all at once. “Do you think we’re going to figure out shit out, Cal? We’re not going to make it if we don’t.” And they all clearly had a lot to work out. They couldn’t be a band if they were at odds with each other. Michael wasn’t sure they would make it without Luke, and he also wasn’t sure he was mature enough to not let his feeling get in the way.

Letting his hands fall, Michael leaned against Calum and rested his head on the bassist’s shoulder. Michael needed time to figure his heart out, even if it meant forcing himself to get over Luke and move on. He could do that. Piece of cake. “Thank you for coming to get me tonight,” he said softly. “I forgot to say that earlier but I really appreciate it. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Calum had always been something of a rock for Michael, someone who never let him sink too far into his own head. Michael was lucky to have someone like Calum in his life and he knew to never take it for granted. “And I’m sorry about the shit with Ashton. It sucks, right? Being into someone you can’t really have?” Because that’s exactly how Michael felt about Luke right now. He gave Calum’s shoulder a nuzzle with his cheek, and reached for his hand. “I’m glad you have Lucy though.”

 

 **CALUM:**  Calum nodded in agreement when Michael pointed out it would be better if they didn't tell anyone about their kiss - even though it wasn't a French kiss, it'd still take a lot of explaining  _why_  they kissed in the first place, and he didn't want to out his bandmates to his girlfriend. And most importantly, he didn't want to hurt Ashton. Things were weird enough between them that he didn't want to - like Michael - make it worse. He smiled at his friend, brow furrowed slightly at his frustrated groan, and reached over with one hand to pat his leg reassuringly. Calum turned his head to Michael when the other boy asked him if he thought they were going to figure this shit out - and he was right, if they couldn't then the band wouldn't make it. Because there was going to be a lot more pressure and stress coming from outside (as great as it would be to get signed and get famous, Calum wasn't completely naive) so they needed to be strong and they needed to have each other's backs too.

"Of course we're going to figure it out," he promised his friend, meeting Michael's gaze with his own encouragingly, "You, me, and Ash, we've been friends for a really long time." They'd known Luke almost as long, but Calum didn't think now was the time to talk about Luke - or what it would mean to have him in the band, or not. "Things are shitty and confusing right now, and it sucks," because it hurt too, "But it's gonna get better. And eventually this'll all be... really good songwriting material," the bassist cracked a smile, hoping it would cheer Michael up. The most important thing, in Calum's opinion, was to remember that they were a ton of people in Manassas who didn't think they were going to make it - so they had to believe in themselves. Why make it easier for the assholes? 5 Seconds of Summer was too good for doubt.

"Don't worry about me and Ashton, I'll fix that," Cal decided aloud - the only thing Michael should worry about was... him and Luke, and what it would mean for the band if they lost Luke (or if they kept him). "It'll all work out." Calum leaned his head onto Michael's, the weight of his best friend pressed against his shoulder, and he smiled. "You'd do the same for me," he nudged Michael gently - his bandmate didn't have to say 'thanks'. Calum gave a lopsided shrug when Michael apologized about what was going on with Ashton. "Yeah..." It did suck to want someone so much and know it was never going to happen. Sometimes Calum felt like it was really unfair to Lucy because she didn't know the whole story about him and Ashton, and sometimes he wondered if she deserved to know but he couldn't bring himself to tell her. He couldn't do that to Ashton, and it... it was complicated.

Calum knew he'd get over it eventually, and he cared a lot about Lucy. She was awesome in so many ways, and it reminded him that he deserved to be in a relationship with someone who could give him what he really needed, and Ashton wasn't that person. It wasn't fair to project those kinds of expectations on him when he knew better. One day at a time, right? Soon things would get back to normal between them. Michael squeezed his hand and Calum returned the gesture, tilting his head back to look at the stars. After a few minutes, he finally spoke, "Wanna sleep over at my house? We can watch a movie." And play video games.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luke and Ashton hit up a party at Jack's frat house in Princeton and lots of truths come out. They do say you're the most honest when you're drunk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of Lashton bromance to go with the previous Malum bromance. :) Hope you guys enjoy this chapter!

**ASHTON:**  Ashton had told Calum he couldn’t hang out because he had to watch Lauren and Harry, which wasn’t entirely true. Sure, he often watched his siblings while his parents were gone because they were too young to watch themselves, but for the most part he raised them on his own. Ashton’s parents were the type who really shouldn’t have had children because they were ultimately selfish people who hid behind religious zealotry and liked to hit their eldest. Ashton felt like he’d only really gotten away with the band gig because he didn’t talk about it much and didn’t push his luck. It wasn’t like his parents ever actually showed up to any event they played at, but he had lied to Calum because he didn’t want to be in a weird predicament. Calum had a girlfriend while he’d quickly broken up with Lucy’s friend after she’d spilled the news Calum and Lucy had sex for the first time. That had been an awkward conversation because Ashton had wanted to tell Calum everything he felt. He couldn’t. It was like even when the words wanted to come pouring out there was some force that paralyzed his tongue. Ashton had convinced himself it was better this way because he definitely didn’t want to put Calum in the crosshairs of his parents. It would end poorly.   
  
So he found himself lying in his bed, staring up at the ceiling with Twenty One Pilots playing low in his earbuds (not a band that was parent approved) when he got a text from Luke. It wasn’t totally uncommon for Ashton to get a text from his bandmate and the message asked him if he wanted to go to a college party at his brother’s frat house in Princeton. Leave it to Luke to have connections to ivy league frat parties, but it wasn’t like Ashton was doing anything else so he agreed in a message back. Luke’s next message told Ashton he’d be there in fifteen minutes to pick him up so Ashton got out of the bed and looked for clothes to throw on. He’d never been to a college party and had no idea what kind of dress code would be expected. Ashton chose skinny jeans without rips in them, a black button down shirt and his least beat up pair of converse. It wasn’t like he was trying to impress anyone but he didn’t want to be the embarrassing friend either. On a second thought, Ashton shot Luke a message and told him to park down the street and he’d meet him there. He was going to have to sneak out so his parents didn’t question where he was going and with who. It was something Ashton was used to and he slipped out his window and shimmied down the tree that was next to it. He managed to reach the ground without ripping his clothes or hurting himself.

Luke’s car was at the end of the street as agreed upon and Ashton slid into the passenger seat, putting his backpack between his feet and buckling up. “What’s up?” he asked. Honestly, Ashton was a little surprised Luke hadn’t asked one of his usual crew to go to this party with him. Though lately things had been different between the four of them. Michael and Luke didn’t fight anymore, in fact, they seemed to actually like each other. That wasn’t the only thing because Ashton had noticed an increase in how touchy-feely his bandmates had become. It left him wondering if there was more to the story, things he and Calum weren’t privy to. Then again, Calum might be which he wouldn’t know because he hadn’t actually talked to Calum since their last conversation about his loss of virginity.

 

**LUKE:** Luke wanted to get out of town, and he owed his brother a visit anyway since he didn't help with move in during September. Jack pledged Phi Kappa Psi which was the same fraternity that President Woodrow Wilson pledged (cue eyeroll here) and he received an invitation to join the eating club Cannon which was really selective; you didn't get to pledge it, an elder 'brother' invited you in. Basically, his brother was only a sophomore at Princeton and he was already a big deal. Most of the time, Luke was annoyed by it but this weekend it was actually useful. He texted Jack and said he wanted to visit, asked if anything cool was going on, and scored a frat party invite.

Luke didn't want to go alone but he didn't want to go with any of his friends either. They'd really pissed him off with the shit they said about Michael, and he didn't want to go with someone who was going to be impressed by Princeton, he wanted to go with someone who would make fun of the yuppies with him - so he asked Ashton to come. Maybe he wanted to know what Michael was doing but he didn't want to ask straight up, and he didn't want to talk to Calum about it because he knew they'd been friends since they were kids.

Ashton told him to park down the street so he did, and Luke waited for the other boy to come out at 7:30 p.m. It took three hours to get there, so they'd be on time for the party, not too early like a couple of idiots. Luke smiled in greeting when the passenger side door opened, and Ashton got in the car.  _"What's up?"_  Luke shrugged in response. "Nothing," he said, "just wanted to get out of town for a few hours. Manassas sucks." He knew Ashton wouldn't disagree with him about that - and Luke didn't want to admit the real reason he was desperate to get away from Manassas was because every stupid thing about this stupid town reminded him of Michael, and what happened in Woodbridge. He just didn't want to think about it anymore. "FYI, this party is gonna be full of tools," he warned Ashton as he pulled away from the curb, "but also, free alcohol and it'll be the really good shit."

For most of the drive, he and Ash talked about everything  _but_  Michael (and Calum). They talked about music, mostly, how hot the bassist was for Panic! at the Disco, how All Time Low was coming to D.C. at the end of the month and wouldn't it be awesome to be in the pit for that, shit like that. It was fun, easy conversation. There was no traffic so Luke sped most of the way, and after he found a parking spot, they headed over to the frat house which was technically 'off campus'. There were a ton of people already there, and the music was so loud that he could hear the throb of the bass on the street. There was no one checking IDs so they walked right in, basically.

Luke made a beeline for the kegs lined up against the wall, and an hour in he was already drunk enough to feel awesome and scream the lyrics to Nickelback's "How You Remind Me" when it came on (ironically). He danced with some girls whose names he forgot, and then in a half-boozed haze he looked for Ash.

When he found his bandmate again, it was with way too much exuberance that Luke pulled him into a big hug. "Man, I am so glad you're here," he said earnestly, "Michael hates me now so... I don't know, I thought you might hate me too." Which would mean getting kicked out of the band for real.

 

**ASHTON:** A three hour ride was a long ass time but it passed quickly as he and Luke found things to talk about, mostly music, but that was the biggest thing they had in common. It was easy to chat with Luke so casually and Ashton was relieved that he didn’t want to talk about deeper shit, like Michael and Calum. That wasn’t what this night was about. This night was about being young and stupid and that’s exactly what Ashton intended to do. Was he going to be in trouble for this later? Most definitely but it would be worth it and Ashton was finding it difficult to give a fuck about what his parents wanted.   
  
Ashton wasn’t sure what he was expecting when they pulled up to the frat house and parked, but when he got out of the car and took in the scene before him, it was like something out of every bad college movie he’d ever seen. People were everywhere, drinking and talking too loudly, music blaring from inside the house and Ashton wondered how the hell the cops hadn’t been called yet for a noise complaint. He stuck close to Luke as they made their way into the house, their IDs going unchecked, and they headed right for the kegs. The beer didn’t taste as cheap as Ashton expected and at some point he lost track of time. Luke had disappeared in the crowd but Ashton wasn’t necessarily looking for him either. There were hot college girls literally everywhere and the brunette that approached him asked his name and that was it. Ashton had a hard time hearing her over the music but he thought she said her name was Alison. Not that it really mattered because two minutes later she had her tongue down Ashton’s throat and he was more than happy to oblige.   
  
Between the alcohol, Alison’s flavored lip gloss and the way her small waist fit in his hands, it was easy for Ashton to forget about his problems. No one seemed to notice them making out against the wall and the music and chatter was all white noise in the background. Ashton liked the way Alison’s fingers moved through his hair and the way she pressed her body against his, stirring arousal in him that was half because of attraction and half because of biology. Despite his booze coated brain, Ashton found he was comparing the way this girl felt against him to how Calum did. It felt like they kissed for ages when Alison finally broke it and said she was going to see if there was an open room and told Ashton to meet her upstairs in five minutes, to which he agreed with a grin. Ashton didn't see a reason not to go for it if she wanted him. It'd be a great way to get Calum out of his head for a little bit.  
  
Ashton had just downed a couple of shots (he couldn’t really taste them at this point) when Luke found him, pulling him into a big hug and said how glad he was Ashton had come with him, along with something about Michael hating him. “What?” Ashton asked, pulling back slightly so he could look at his friend. “Why would I hate you? Why does Michael hate you?” He had no actual idea what was going on. Everything had seemed fine between Luke and Michael a few days ago. Michael had stopped hating Luke as far as he knew. What had Luke done to make Michael start hating him again?

 

**LUKE:** Ashton didn't get it which meant Michael wasn't talking about it - at least not to  _everyone_  in the band. Okay, yeah, there was only one other person he would've talked to but that's why he didn't text Calum tonight. Ashton wanted to know why Michael hated him and that was a good fucking question. "'Cause I suck, I guess." That was definitely part of it. "I gotta tell you something," he leaned in because it was supposed to be a secret, that was one of Michael's rules but you know what? Fuck Michael's rules, Luke didn't have to follow them anymore. "Me and Michael, we're... we've been fucking.. for, like, a month!"

Luke shrugged as he spoke, giving his friend a lopsided grin. "I'm kinda gay. I mean, I didn't think I was gay but when I'm with Michael it's..." he waved his hand in front of his face, "It's like, Amber who?" He never thought about her when they were together, even when they weren't having sex. Whenever he was around Michael, he was all Luke saw. All he wanted. But he didn't want Luke back, not anymore.

Luke spotted somebody's unfinished shot glass on a nearby table and he grabbed it for himself - but he forgot it was in his hand, and forgot to drink it. "I took him out on my parents' boat a couple days ago and it just.... I dunno, they were dicks, and my friends showed up and... he just... he was done. With me. And my shit, I guess." Michael got tired of him. Either that or he figured out that Luke wasn't worth all the strings attached to his name like his family, and his friends, and his girlfriend. And to be honest, he couldn't really blame him, but... "I didn't see it coming and it hurts so fucking bad, I can't... I dunno..." He didn't know what to do to get over this, but he hated, hated,  _hated_  feeling this way.

That's where the beer and the shot came in, and it burned his throat going down without tasting like anything. Feeling melancholic, and a little unsteady on his feet, Luke leaned against the wall next to Ashton. "He hates me."

 

**ASHTON:** Ashton felt like he’d stepped into some kind of alternate reality when Luke admitted to why Michael hated him. His brain was slow on the uptake and it took a few minutes for it to sink in and when it did, Ashton responded slowly. “What the fuck?” he blurted out. If he had been sober, Ashton felt like his response would have been a lot sharper but he was wasted and all he wanted to do was sit down. The girl he was supposed to be meeting upstairs (Ashton had already forgotten her name) was a distant memory. It was pretty obvious Luke wasn’t going to let him slip away and even drunk Ashton knew that would be a dick move. So he watched Luke grab up a shot that he didn’t drink and spill his guts about the boat, his parents being dicks to Michael, and his girlfriend showing up. Ashton winced, knowing that was a recipe for disaster. And when Luke swayed slightly and leaned against the wall, Ashton groaned faintly. “C’mon,” he slurred. He grabbed Luke by the front of his shirt and pulled him off the wall. Ashton leaned against Luke, who leaned heavily back against him and, and he blinked to clear his blurry vision. Dammit he shouldn’t have drank so much. Ashton was looking for Jack, whom he’d met earlier only briefly, and he figured it shouldn’t be hard to find him since Luke and Jack looked alike. “I’m sure...Michael doesn’t really hate you…” If Ashton wasn’t drunk he was sure things would have made a lot more sense, such as why Luke and Michael were suddenly inseparable.   
  
By some grace of God, Ashton spotted Jack near the beer pong table and called out to him over the music. Luke was heavy despite being kind of lanky.  _”What’s up?”_  Ashton watched as Jack put the pieces together himself.  _”You guys can crash in my room. Come on._ ” A sigh left Ashton and they stumbled after Luke’s brother, up the stairs and down the hall until they reached Jack’s room. Jack opened the door for them, patted Ashton on the back and said he’d be back with water, before leaving them in the room. Ashton wondered if Jack would actually be back or not as he deposited Luke onto the bed and then crashed into the mattress next to him.   
  
Ashton stared up at the ceiling for a minute before he spoke, words coming out slowly. “What’d you mean...you’re only ‘kinda’ gay? How is someone only kinda gay? Isn’t that like...bisexual or pansexual or something?” he asked. There were so many different ways to identify these days that Ashton sometimes struggled to keep up with them all. Mostly, he tried not to think about it because it meant questioning his own sexual identity and he didn’t want to do that. Like ever. “And what about your girlfriend?” Ashton couldn’t fathom, drunk or sober, that she’d be okay with Luke fucking another dude...or anyone else, actually.

 

**LUKE:** Ashton said he was sure Michael  _didn't_  hate him but Luke shook his head back and forth until it made him dizzy, stumbling over his own two feet. "He said he doesn't want me," Luke mumbled miserably, but he didn't say anything else because his brother showed up. He blinked at Jack, glassy-eyed, and didn't protest when the two of them led him up the stairs and down the hallway. If Luke was sober he probably would've been grateful to his brother, especially since he hadn't spent any time at the party  _with_  Jack. The best part was he knew Jack wouldn't rat him out to their parents because it would mean admitting  _he_  was there too.

Luke landed on something soft and he rolled onto his back with a groan, blinking up at the ceiling which seemed to shift and swivel each time he opened his eyes. He shifted onto his side with a furrowed brow when he heard Ashton's voice, and it took him a few seconds to realize where the drummer was in the room.  _"How is someone only kinda gay?"_  It felt like a riddle, one that Luke hadn't really figured out the answer to yet. Bisexual? Pansexual? "I dunno," he answered honestly. "One of those, maybe. It's not like I can't get off with a girl, but with Michael it was... different, it was fucking amazing." He guessed Ashton didn't want to know how great his friend was in the sack - but Michael  _was_ great. "He's the best I ever had. Guy, girl, whatever. I only wanna be with him," Luke blurted the words out suddenly.

But what about his girlfriend? Fuck. He kept forgetting about her - but Michael didn't, and neither did Ashton. Luke shrugged in response, shifting on top of the bed. "What about her? I don't even remember what I like her for...." Definitely not her personality, though she didn't used to be as bad as she was now, and even though she was a bitch they had a good time together. "She is hot as hell." That was true. "Probably hotter than Michael... y'know, objectively speaking," Luke slurred the words but he got them all out, "But he's a million times more... everything to me than any girl. He's special. He makes me feel good, even when everything else is shitty." Amber had never done that, and Luke missed him already. "Do you know what I mean?"

 

**ASHTON:**  It was hard to focus on what Luke was saying when the room felt like it was spinning around them. Ashton groaned faintly as Luke said Michael was ‘the best he ever had’ because he really, really didn’t want to think about it. Not because it was two guys, but because Michael was like a brother and he didn’t want to know about his siblings bedroom habits. Ashton was glad when the conversation didn’t continue down that path and moved onto Luke’s highkey emotions for Michael. For a long time while Luke spoke, Ashton was quiet and even in his drunken state, the guy’s words were really resonating with him. Ashton knew exactly how all of that felt. It was the same things he felt for Calum and a part of him was a little envious that Luke could be so open about it. Maybe it was just to him and maybe because of the alcohol. Ashton wasn’t sure and he drew in a breath. “Yeah I know what you mean,” he grunted. He had never admitted to anyone the things he felt about Calum, not even to himself, but when Ashton opened his mouth again it all came pouring out.   
  
“Cal and I have messed around. Lots of times. Actually, up until he started dating uh...that girl...Lucy…” Ashton shook his head. How the hell had he almost forgotten her name? “No one knew because well...you know what my parents are like. They’d kill me if they ever found out I liked a guy.” Disown him. Keep him from seeing his siblings. Beat the shit out of him for it. There was no scenario in which his parents knowing he liked guys would end well. “I fucking love Calum but I dunno...can’t be what he needs so I guess I should be happy for him, y’know?” Ashton made a face at the ceiling. He didn’t want to be happy for Calum and Lucy. He wanted to be angry and selfish. Ashton wanted Calum to choose him even if it wasn’t fair. “Doesn’t matter. I don’t think he wants me anymore either so I guess you and I are both kinda fucked huh?” A humorless laugh left Ashton.   
  
Turning on his side so he could face Luke, Ashton closed his eyes to stop the nausea that swept over him. “You should...probably ditch the girlfriend...if you want Mikey to take you seriously,” he said slowly. Michael wasn’t the sharing type. It shocked the hell out of Ashton Michael had gone an entire month sharing Luke with Amber. It sort of felt like everything he thought he knew was just plain wrong.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke blinked at Ashton without really registering what the drummer was saying: that he and Cal messed around. Like...  _messed around_? "Seriously?" he breathed, eyes widening in realization. He didn't know Ash was into guys. He didn't know that about Calum either but maybe that was because he'd never really thought about it. Being buzzed made the shock less important, and Luke didn't interrupt his friend when he explained why nobody knew: his parents. "Yeah..." He knew the Irwins by reputation more than anything else, because he'd never been over to Ashton's house. Luke got the sense Ashton didn't want to remind his parents about his band, which he sort of understood. Ash not telling his parents he liked a guy was not a surprise, the fact that the drummer said it was about  _liking_  somebody, not just fucking around, that was different. He loved Calum.

But he couldn't 'be what Calum needed', whatever the heck that meant. Like a boyfriend or whatever. "I guess." Ashton thought he should be happy for the guy he liked to be with someone else, Luke disagreed. He didn't want to sit around and wait for Michael to hook up with somebody else; and he thought he  _could_  be what Michael needed, he just wasn't sure what the hell that was supposed to be. Luke thought things were going pretty good up until that night at the marina but Michael was so mad. Maybe it really was just because of his parents. They were awful to him and it had been really embarrassing. Luke made a soft, non-committal sound when Ashton said it didn't matter, that they were both fucked. "Maybe." Luke wasn't sure yet, he guessed he had to make Michael talk to him - but he knew his bandmate wasn't gonna answer his phone. Maybe he wouldn't even answer the door if Luke went to his house.

"D'you  _know_  what Calum wants? Maybe you can be that." Luke figured it came down to how big the hoops were and whether or not that was worth it. "I want to be what Michael wants. You don't just get over someone..." Not when things were as intense as they were between him and Michael. There was no way Luke was going to take this lying down. Fuck that. Fuck Michael's lame ass rules and his... the shit he said, it wasn't true. Luke knew it wasn't true because what was true was how he felt right after they got on the boat, when Michael touched him and kissed him to make him feel better. "I'm gonna get him back," he decided. He just wasn't sure how to do that yet, and then Ashton said a really smart thing, which was that Luke should get rid of his girlfriend if he wanted Michael to take him seriously. "Really?" Luke hadn't really thought about that, but it made sense. And he was still pissed off at her. "Okay... thanks."

 

**ASHTON:**  No, Ashton didn’t know what Calum wanted because he’d never asked. Asking would have put them into an even more awkward position because Ashton wouldn’t have been able to follow through. He knit his brow and shook his head before realizing Luke probably couldn’t see that and muttered, “No.” It was too much to try and think about with his alcohol addled brain and the sick feeling welling in his stomach. “Doesn’t matter anyway since he’s got Lucy.” What was Ashton supposed to do? Tell Calum to dump his girlfriend and wait around for him? There was no way Ashton could do that because at the core he wasn’t that selfish. It would have been better if they hadn’t started messing around at all, but they had and it couldn’t be taken back. Ashton would have to deal with the consequences. He wasn’t like Luke. Ashton couldn’t go after what he really wanted because it would bring about a storm he couldn’t weather.   
  
Ashton stared up at the ceiling as Luke spoke, said he was going to get Michael back and he was going to be what Michael wanted. A small part of him was envious of Luke’s conviction, but a bigger part of him hoped it worked out for his friends. “Good luck then,” he slurred, his eyes falling closed. All Ashton wanted to do was sleep now. He didn’t want to think about Calum or Calum and Lucy or Michael and Luke. Ashton didn’t want to think about his fears and imagine what would happen to him if his parents found out he’d ever hooked up with a guy. “Hope it works out for ya,” Ashton murmured faintly.   
  
The sound of chatter and music coming from downstairs that could be heard through the open door of the room lulled Ashton into a sort of semi-sleep. In the back of his mind, as the booze started to wear off, he knew he was going to be in a world of trouble for staying out all night. And though he didn’t necessarily intend to do it, Ashton reached for Luke’s hand between them and gripped it tightly as he fell asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Luke decides he's going to earn back Michael's affections and is really super cute about it. :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello loves! I know it's been a little minute since I last posted for this fic and I'm sorry to have kept you all waiting. I just wanted to let you know that things might be coming along a little bit more slowly since school has started for Ayo (my gf) again and she's quite busy. Please be patient with us! We promise not to let you down and the story will continue because we have tons of things we want to do with this story. :)

**LUKE:** Michael dyed his hair green.

Luke didn't know why that bothered him so much, once he sobered up after the party in Princeton. He wondered if Michael was faking it, or if he really was over... whatever it was he and Luke had together. Luke spent a couple days obsessing over it, and either way one thing was clear: him and Amber, weren't working out. So he broke up with her. It was messy... and loud. But once he finally got away from her, he felt almost as elated as he did the first time he played with 5sos that night in Annapolis. Two days later, he made a decision, and decided to call Michael's bluff. He'd gone over the month they'd been together in his head in a million times, and he knew it couldn't be true, that shit Michael said. Michael wasn't that good a liar. Which meant that Luke had a chance. All he had to do was persuade Michael.

That afternoon, Luke paid the lawn maintenance guy a hundred bucks to borrow a ladder and his pick-up truck for the night. After his parents left to drive down to a benefit in D.C., he texted Calum to ask if Michael was with him. Calum said he wasn't, and asked 'why?' but Luke ignored that text. It meant Michael was home, and that was all that mattered. Luke waited around until ten p.m. to go over to Michael's house, and the longer he waited, the more nervous he got and the more he wanted to overcompensate and make a really big gesture of it. So he changed his clothes twice, and his hair was mostly under control, and he went by the garden store closest to his house to pick up roses. Did you give guys roses? Luke was going to do it and Michael was going to laugh in his face over it (hopefully - better that than him telling Luke to fuck right off) but he didn't even care. He wanted to see Michael.

It was a quarter past ten when he got to the Cliffords' house, and then he had to carry the stupid ladder from the curb where he parked the truck to the side of the house that had Michael's room, and it took him way too long to figure out which side of the house that was (he'd been inside a million times, but he'd never looked at it from the outside to orient where the room was in relation to everything else). Eventually he figured out the right window (the light was still on) and he held the roses in one hand, the other a death grip on the railing of the ladder while he climbed it.

When he got to the top rung, he peered into the window and confirmed that he was in the right place - and not creeping on Michael's parents by mistake (that would be really fucking embarrassing, they'd probably call the cops). And he saw Michael was in the room, so he knocked on the window until the other boy noticed him. Luke crawled onto the edge of the roof, teetering between that and the ladder, trying to not to think about how much disgusting shit fell on a rooftop and what that was doing to his jeans. He waited for Michael to open the window, and then he showed the other boy the flowers. "Hey," Luke greeted him casually, realizing he hadn't thought about what he would  _say_  in this situation. So instead, he gave Michael the dozen roses.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Two days after the day in Woodbridge and his chat with a certain bassist, Michael asked Calum to come over and help him dye his hair a new color. Michael was tired of the red and he wanted a change. Something different. Calum helped him strip the red from his hair until it was a white blonde that could be redyed and some two hours later, Michael’s hair was a lime green that made his mother want to die a little. She fussed about how he was going to end up damaging his hair and that their school wasn’t going to be so understanding each time the color got brighter and brighter, but ultimately she gave up and went to bed. Luckily, they’d been careful enough not to burn his scalp and when they were done, Michael and Calum played video games and ate pizza before his bandmate had to go home. Michael waited a day for the color to settle before posting a selfie on Instagram with the vague caption ‘changes’. Michael never really paid too much attention to the comments or likes his social media posts got but a small part of him hoped Luke saw it, hoped Luke saw it and believed Michael was over him.

Michael was absolutely not over Luke at all, but he didn’t want Luke to know that because it would just complicate things. Even though he knew he was going to have to talk to his bandmate - to all of his bandmates - it was something Michael was putting on the back burner. They had a gig in three weeks and Michael had no idea if Luke was going to stay in the band or not. It wasn’t going to be a choice he made because Michael didn’t want that on his consciences, but he assumed Luke wouldn’t want to stay either. Michael hadn’t seen him since Woodbridge and all the messages Luke had left him subsequently had gone unanswered. Michael had only cried once over it, after Calum had dropped him off at home that night and he’d gotten in the shower only to sit in the tub and let the water mask the sound of it. After that, Michael told himself he wasn’t going to waste any more tears on Luke, especially when it was his decision to call it quits.

But that didn’t mean that Michael couldn’t let out his feelings in the form of art, and he spent two days straight in his room, writing in his lyrics journal. It helped him feel better, helped him cope with his emotions without having to bother anyone with his bullshit. As much as he knew Calum would be there for him whenever Michael needed him, he also knew that his best friend was dealing with his own shit. Michael hoped Ashton figured his shit out at some point, but he also understood what kept the drummer from feeling too much. At least a little bit.

It was nearing ten o’clock when Michael set his acoustic guitar aside and pulled up his Instagram on his phone with the intention of uploading it. It wasn’t much, just an instrumental of the song he’d been working on tonight but he liked the feedback. Michael never really answered questions about their music because so much of it was personal, so much of it lately was about Luke, and he wasn’t about to out either of them. There were too many people from school that watched their social medias and would use anything they could as ammo. The video uploaded and all he needed to do was caption it when something knocked against his bedroom window. Michael let out a yelp of surprise, dropping his phone in his lap as he whirled around in his desk chair to see what the hell was outside of his window. His heart was in his throat, beating rapidly even after he realized it was...Luke. Luke and roses.

Crossing the room, Michael opened the window and knit his brow. “Hey?” he asked, incredulous. “Luke, what the hell are you doing? How did you get up here?” He leaned out the window slightly to see a ladder propped against the side of his house. When Michael leaned back in and Luke gave him the roses, he felt a blush crawling up his neck and into his cheeks. “Uh...thanks…” He took the flowers and stepped back so Luke could come inside.

No one had ever given him flowers before. Hell, Michael was pretty sure that it wasn’t customary for a guy to give another guy flowers, and he bit down on his lower lip as he stared down at them. What was he supposed to do with them? Dig out one of his mother’s vases, he guessed. For now, Michael set the flowers down on his desk and turned to face Luke, who was still near the window, the whole width of Michael’s bedroom away from him. He had no idea what to say.

 

**LUKE:**  " _Hey?_ " Luke shrugged in response, smiling slightly to mask how nervous he was. He only thought up to the part where Michael actually opened the window, but he could at least answer the question about how he got up on the roof. "I rented a truck and a ladder." He didn't think his parents owned a ladder, he'd never seen either of them do any sort of work on the house or even change a light bulb. "Figuring out which room was yours was the hard part, I didn't want to freak your parents out." Freaking Michael out, on the other hand, was something Luke hoped to make up for with the roses. He thought it was a good sign that the guitarist took the flowers from him, and Luke felt a smile tugging at his lips as soon as he noticed the blush. "Can I come in?"

Michael stepped back which he took as a yes, and Luke climbed over the window ledge, dusting off his hands on the sides of his jeans as he stood up. He didn't move any closer to Michael, though, and to be honest he liked having the open window at his back. It didn't make him feel so claustrophobic, because he was about to do something a lot more embarrassing than climbing a ladder and buying flowers. "The last thing you said to me was, 'leave me alone'." Michael hadn't responded to any of his messages afterwards, but he was drunk and increasingly angry throughout so he didn't blame him for that. "I don't think you meant that." Or the part where he said he didn't want him anymore. Luke didn't believe him. "That's why I'm here."

Luke felt awkward, heart beating so loud and fast it was the only thing he could hear, and he slid his hands into his back pockets to have something to do with them. What he really wanted was to cross the room to Michael but he wasn't sure the other boy would let him. "What we had together was... we weren't just fucking and you know it. It was so much more than that." More than getting great sex from someone he genuinely liked. "Being with you showed me just how much I was missing with Amber, which is why I broke up with her." Luke glanced away from Michael briefly, blowing out a steadying breath and wishing he was a little buzzed because that would help with the nerves.

"And I'm not telling you this with any expectations, I just..." he hesitated, then admitted, "I thought you should know that if you asked me to choose, I would choose you." But instead Michael had made the decision for them, and Luke wondered if Michael thought this didn't mean anything to him. He was wrong. "And hell, maybe I'm way off base and you really don't want me anymore, but I still want you. Just you." He guessed that was what he came here to say.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Even with all the space between them, Michael felt like his room was smaller than it was. The door was closed behind him, which was he grateful for because he didn’t want anyone to overhear whatever was going to happen. His parents were likely in bed but maybe not asleep and Madison was in the room next to him. Michael really didn’t want his little sister eavesdropping on this conversation. It was hard enough as is. Luckily, Madison had music playing which would hopefully muffle any noise from his room. As long as things didn’t get heated between them it should be fine.   
  
Michael shifted awkwardly when Luke spoke, calling his bluff, and he was right. Michael hadn’t meant that but when Luke didn’t try to come after him again, he assumed that was truly the end of it. He realized it was unfair to expect Luke to know what he was saying wasn’t what he meant at the time, especially when tensions had been so high already. Michael had taken the easy way out of this and he knew it. A shiver ran down his spine and he wrapped his arms around himself protectively, like he could protect what was left of his broken heart. Michael felt like an exposed nerve, raw and easily agitated, and he supposed that was because no one liked to be called out on their bullshit. And more specifically, he didn’t know how he felt about Luke being able to read him that well after only a month of being together...technically. The fact they’d known each other almost their whole lives was just details in Michael’s opinion.   
  
_We weren't just fucking and you know it._  Michael sucked in a sharp breath though he had yet to actually look at Luke. He did know it was so much more than that. It had meant more, felt like more, even from the very start. Michael had never wanted anyone the way he had Luke, and each time after that had been just as amazing because he’d never felt so wanted. He had never thought of himself as someone that was desirable but Luke had made Michael feel that way every damn day. It was hard to describe and he didn’t think it could be done with words alone. Michael felt his throat tighten and he swallowed the lump that formed there.   
  
When Luke said he’d broken up with Amber, Michael’s eyes snapped up to him. “You did?” It was on the tip of his tongue to ask why even though Luke had already explained. It didn’t seem like enough reason but maybe it was, and maybe Michael needed to stop overanalyzing everything and just accept things for what they were. No expectations. Luke would choose him. It all made Michael momentarily dizzy. It was a lot to consume all at once and he had to take a moment to let it all sink in, sort it out and accept it. “Luke...I…” He didn’t know how to articulate this very well but he was going to try. “You’re right, I did know that but this whole thing...your life and my life...I don’t know how to make it work.” The admission didn’t come easily for Michael and he bit down on his lower lip for a second. “I do want you...more than anything but I’m scared. I’m so fucking scared of what would happen if people found out about us.” He felt like he was going to cry again. Michael hated what an emotional train wreck he’d become lately.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke smiled when his bandmate asked him to confirm it, that he'd really broken up with Amber, and he nodded. It wasn't just about Michael, it was about Luke coming to terms with the kind of person he was: that he liked boys, that he wanted to go all the way to L.A. with 5sos, that he was better than this town  _in spite of_  being a Hemmings. Breaking up with Amber just sealed the deal: he didn't want to be two people anymore. Luke could hear in Michael's voice when he finally said something that it wasn't going to be as easy as he wanted it to be - but the guitarist said he was right. It wasn't just fucking. And he was right about Michael still wanting him, despite what he said that night.

Luke didn't see what it was they had to work out when it came to their lives, but he understood the fear. His smile faded as Michael's words sank in - and he'd been so nervous about getting rejected again, he had deliberately  _not_  thought about how fucking scary it would be if they were outed. Luke couldn't think of anything reassuring to say, but he also hated how much distance there was between him and Michael. So he crossed the room to Michael, hesitating inches away from him, before he reached out to smooth his hands down his bandmate's arms, then back up again. He looped his arms around Michael's neck and pulled him into a hug, burying his face in his bright green hair with an unsteady exhale. "'M scared too," he murmured against his ear, taking advantage of their height difference to press a kiss to the top of his head. "I'm not saying we have to come out or anything," Luke wasn't ready for that either, not really, "But... maybe we can tweak our ground rules, huh?" He offered a reassuring smile to the other boy.

Luke slipped one hand under Michael's chin to tip it back until their noses bumped together. Then Luke placed a short kiss from his cheek. "We keep it a secret," which was Michael's first rule anyway, "But the rest of the rules we trash because they're crap - no offense." It wasn't like they were doing a good job keeping to them anyway. "We  _are_  a couple, even if no one else knows. You  _are_  my boyfriend, which means no kissing anyone but you." Luke smiled as he spoke, dipping his head to press a soft kiss to Michael's mouth, and it was everything he'd wanted for a week, "And there are definitely strings attached." Luke said each word with a kiss to Michael's mouth.

Luke wasn't completely sure what that all entailed, but he had a couple ideas. "We're not that different, Mikey," he insisted softly, "You don't have to be part of my life, you've pretty much paid your dues for life with that bullshit boat trip from Hell." No more trying to mesh Michael, the band, and his parents. Luke could see now that it just wasn't gonna work - and that was okay, he was okay with it. "I want to be part of yours. I'll do whatever it takes." Whatever Michael wanted him to do to prove he wasn't one of the assholes at the marina, he'd do it. "Give me a chance."

 

**MICHAEL:**  Luke crossed the room and Michael saw his hesitation before his bandmate reached out to touch him, Luke’s hands on his arms in a way that was soothing. Michael smiled faintly and it felt like another weight had been lifted off his chest when Luke admitted to being scared as well. Really, Luke had a lot more to lose than Michael did and he didn’t want to be the reason. He didn’t hesitate when Luke pulled him forward and into him, placed a kiss on the top of his head and asked to tweak the ‘ground rules’. A soft laugh left Michael and he nodded before Luke lifted his chin and kissed his cheek. They would keep it a secret and toss out the rest of the rules because they sucked. Michael smiled, knowing they totally sucked and everything he’d tried to prevent from happening did anyway. He felt his breath quicken and his heart begin to race when Luke stated that they were a couple and Michael was his boyfriend. It sounded so strange to him though not unpleasantly so. Michael caught his bottom lip between his teeth and nodded again, eyes slipping closed when Luke kissed him, each one punctuating his words. “Strings attached” he agreed.   
  
Finally, Michael let go of his inhibition and slipped his arms around Luke’s waist, and tucked his head beneath his chin. He closed his eyes and breathed in the scent of his bandmate as Luke spoke, informing him that he’d do whatever it took to be part of Michael’s life, that he just wanted a chance. Turning his head in toward Luke’s neck, Michael nuzzled his nose against the side of it and murmured, “You don’t have to do anything. Just be with me.” He didn’t want Luke to think that he had to prove himself because that wouldn’t be fair. “I’m sorry, Luke. I’m sorry about that night and the way I acted. I...I know I hurt you and I don’t deserve you being so forgiving after that.” Michael leaned back so he could look up at his bandmate - his  _boyfriend_  - and drew in a shaky breath. “It isn’t just about everyone else knowing. I was...afraid of how I felt about you. I guess part of me was just so convinced that if I let you get to close you’d realize what a fuck up I am.” Because he really felt like he was so often. Michael struggled with his own demons, his anxiety and depression. All things that he didn’t want to burden a partner with. “And I guess the other part of me just couldn’t wrap my head around the idea that Luke Hemmings might actually like me back.” It was stupid, and Michael felt stupid saying it but he was willing to lay all the cards on the table.   
  
Michael’s hands came up between them and he cupped Luke’s face in his hands, tilting his head up to kiss him gently. “I’m sorry,” he whispered against Luke’s lips. “Forgive me for what I said?” Luke was right that they weren’t that different. They were just people, young and full of dreams of wanting to get out of their town and make a name for themselves. The things Michael had learned they had in common over the past several months had been eye opening to say the least. He never would have thought he and Luke would be similar in interests but they were, and Michael loved him. Even if he wasn’t ready to say it yet and probably wouldn’t be for awhile, he knew it in his heart of hearts. So he pressed a gentle kiss to Luke’s chin and then his mouth once more. “Kiss me like you mean it,” he demanded, smiling softly.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke had never had a boyfriend before, but he liked the way it felt staking a claim like that, having Michael all to himself, the way it sounded, the way his bandmate caught his lip between his teeth. Michael agreed with him, agreed to the new rules, and Luke relaxed when he felt arms slip around his waist. Michael fit just under his chin and it was perfect, the way his body folded into Luke's, and Luke never wanted to let him go. A soft sound of pleasure escaped as he felt the warmth of Michael's nose nuzzling into the side of his neck with the promise that he didn't have to jump through any hoops, Luke just had to be with him. Luke thought he could pull that off. This was all he wanted.

He was suddenly so fucking grateful to Ashton for having that moment of clarity even when they were totally wasted - because now he was here with the person he wanted most. Michael apologized to him for what happened that night at the marina and Luke's own expression softened because he didn't expect it; he also didn't realize that Michael knew he'd hurt him. He nodded as Michael explained that it wasn't just about being outed, it was feeling something this intense, and not feeling good enough  _for_  it (if that made sense). Luke didn't understand how Michael could see himself as a fuck up when he was anything but, and he definitely didn't expect Michael of all people to get caught up in the whole 'Luke Hemmings' thing. It was all bullshit anyway. All fake.

The only time he felt like himself was with the boys, with Michael. The guitarist cupped his face in his hands and Luke smiled into the kiss, which was so gentle, so sweet it made his head spin. Then Michael was apologizing again, and asking for forgiveness. "Already done," Luke promised softly, "I'm sorry too. I never should've dragged you into that bullshit." He made it all about himself and he subjected Michael to all the crap that reminded him of just how much of a douchebag Luke had been over the years. It was Luke's own fault for putting them both in that situation, but if anything good had come out of it, it had convinced him to man up and make the effort for something he really wanted. "I shouldn't have waited a month to ask you out for real. You are worth it, Michael," he said earnestly.

He smiled into the kiss pressed to his chin, then to his lips, and he laughed against Michael's mouth when his boyfriend demanded that he 'kiss him like he meant it'. Luke closed his eyes, sinking the fingers of one hand into green hair at the base of Michael's neck, the other cupping his shoulder, and he pressed his lips to his bandmate's as if it was the first time. His mouth moved tentatively against Michael's at first, the tip of his tongue brushing the seam of his lips until they parted, and Luke couldn't help the faint moan that thrummed in his throat when he felt Michael's tongue slide against his own, gripping the fabric of the guitarist's shirt until it bunched under his fingers. The kiss grew deeper, hotter, harder and Luke thought absently that Michael kissed like he played guitar, and it moved him, throbbed through him with burning intensity, and Luke was desperate to taste all of it. He backed Michael up into his desk with the roses, rolling his bandmate's swollen bottom lip between his teeth, tongue slipping proprietarily along his teeth, the roof of his mouth, stroking Michael's own tongue.

Luke wanted to taste every inch of the other boy, to remember all of the things he'd missed over the past week. He kissed Michael so fully he couldn't breathe, his hand leaving its place on Michael's shoulder to slide up under his shirt, all rational thought driven from his mind. The texture of Michael's skin against his fingertips made him push closer to his boyfriend, breaking the kiss with a sudden gasp, his forehead pressed to Michael's. "I forgot to tell you," he mumbled against the other boy's mouth, his right hand still caressing the smooth skin of Michael's side beneath his shirt, inching it up playfully, "I like your hair."

 

**MICHAEL:**  A shudder rolled down Michael’s spine as Luke assured him he was worth it. Michael didn’t know if he believed that, not yet at least. It would take time to come to terms with being wanted by someone, but he would get there eventually. His self-worth had never been great but with Luke’s help, Michael thought he could get to a point where he wasn’t so self-deprecating. And he was happy, almost giddy, when Luke acquiesced to his demand and kissed him so thoroughly it took Michael’s breath away. It was intense, heated, and Michael’s fingers found their way up and into Luke’s hair, gripping it gently for just a moment. A soft moan slipped from Michael as he was backed up into the desk, one hand moving behind him instinctively to feel for the surface, and he felt the silky petals of the roses against the back of it. Michael had forgotten about the flowers until then and it made his heart flutter. He could have never expected such a gesture out of Luke. He hadn’t realized that Luke had kind of real romanticism to him but, he did. The roses - the whole gesture - showed Michael that and it didn’t make him feel strange at all. It made him want to explore that part of their relationship just that much more.   
  
A soft hum of encouragement came from Michael when Luke’s hand slipped beneath his shirt, touching his skin, warm against his own. Luke’s fingers were calloused, like his own, from playing guitar and yet Michael didn’t mind that at all because he loved Luke’s hands. Michael loved the way they touched him, the things they made him feel - the things  _Luke_ made him feel. When the kiss was broken, Michael sucked in a breath, his lips swollen and cheeks flushed. There was the edge of arousal just beginning beneath his skin but Michael didn’t want to sleep with Luke tonight. Not after the past week had been so emotionally draining. He smiled when Luke told him that he liked his hair. “Thanks,” he answered softly. Michael slipped his arms around Luke’s neck and pressed a few soft, sweet kisses to his lips. “Will you stay with me tonight? Sleep with me? I’ll even let you be the big spoon.” He grinned against Luke’s mouth. It was Saturday night so neither of them had to be up early for school and Michael didn’t have to be to work until noon. They could kiss and cuddle most of the night if Luke decided to stay.   
  
Luke agreed to stay with him and Michael pushed himself off the desk, his body forcing his boyfriend to move back as well, until they reached the bed. Then Michael let go of Luke to crawl into the bed and flop back against the pillows, already in pajama pants so he didn’t need to change. “You can borrow some pajama pants if you want...or just take your pants off to sleep. I don’t care.” Michael grinned at Luke and waited for him to figure out what he was going to do. Luke joined him in the bed a moment later and Michael reached for him, tugging him close and kissing him softly because he couldn’t get enough of those lips. Luke was his now, only his and no one else’s so Michael wanted to take complete advantage of it. One hand was buried in Luke’s hair and Michael wrapped a leg around his waist so he could roll his bandmate onto his back. Michael crawled on top of him and straddled Luke’s waist between his knees. “One more thing...I wanted to say I’m sorry again for letting myself get so wrapped up in the fact you’re a Hemmings,” he murmured. It wasn’t fair to hold Luke’s name against him. “You’re so much more than your name, Luke. So much more than your family realizes.”   
  
It had never really occurred to Michael that behind all the money and the status and the name, that Luke was like him; a teenager looking to be accepted, who dreamed like he did, wanted more than what was right in front of him. After the day on the yacht, even if Michael hadn’t wanted to see it at the time, it was clear that the Hemmings didn’t love their children unconditionally. Not like his own parents did. Michael couldn’t imagine how that must feel for Luke and it sent a wave of sadness through him. “You’re funny.” Michael kissed his lips. “Talented.” Then he kissed Luke’s cheek, right then the left. “Smart.” A kiss to his forehead. “Beautiful.” Michael shifted so he could press a kiss to Luke’s chest through the material of his shirt, right over his heart. He closed his eyes and turned his cheek to rest against the spot he’d just kissed. “And the band needs you.” Michael hesitated for a moment before he finished his thought. “ _I_  need you.”

 

**LUKE:**  Michael slipped arms around his neck and Luke smiled down at him, both hands sliding up under his shirt now to touch his sides. The kisses were gentle and sweet and he loved it when Michael was soft like this, when it was just the two of them alone. He loved it when Michael was a snarky pain in the ass too, but this was special. It didn't happen often. The guitarist - his  _boyfriend_  - asked him to stay the night, to sleep with him, and Luke realized he wasn't talking about sex. Since he didn't come here to get laid, he wasn't disappointed. Spending the night with Michael in his bed was so much better. "Yeah," he grinned in response, stepping backwards as his bandmate pushed them both away from the desk. Michael let go of him to climb on the bed and Luke watched him, meeting green eyes when the other boy spoke, offering pajama pants if he wanted to wear them tonight. "I'm good," he was wearing boxers, and he didn't wear much else to bed. So he pulled off his shoes and the jeans and tossed them on the floor.

Crawling onto the bed, Luke let himself be tugged down by Michael into another kiss. When his boyfriend hooked a leg through his and rolled him onto his back, it surprised a laugh out of Luke as he stretched out on the bed under Michael. He ran his hands up the outsides of his bandmate's thighs as Michael straddled his waist and apologized again, this time for letting himself get wrapped up in the fact that Luke was a Hemmings. His expression softened as Michael promised him that he was more than his family name, and before he could respond, Michael was telling him that he was funny, talented, smart, and beautiful, as he kissed his face in between each word. Luke's eyes slid closed and his breath caught in his throat when those lips touched his chest through his shirt, fingers slipping through Michael's hair gently as he said the band needed him, that  _he_  needed Luke. Luke needed them too.

"You're the only person I've been with who didn't care about the Hemmings shit," he admitted softly. Michael wanted him for him, and Luke knew that was true because they'd spent so much time hating each other he couldn't possibly be interested in using him for his money or his family's prestige. Luke lowered his voice to mask the emotional tremor in the words, "You make me want to be better, be braver..." Brave enough to stand up to his family, to the people who called themselves his friends, and to do what he loved, not what was expected of him. "I think you're the best thing that's ever happened to me, Michael Clifford." Luke had never felt this way about  _anyone_  he'd dated before.

"Kiss me again," he murmured, beckoning his boyfriend to raise his head, and Luke did the same to meet Michael's mouth with his own. Luke cupped Michael's head in his hands as they kissed, slow and sweet. It wasn't foreplay, it was just enjoying the weight of Michael's body against his, the beat of his heart, the movement of his lips and the sounds that he made. Luke slid his hands down Michael's back to the hemline of his shirt, and he gently pulled it up, baring the pale smooth skin of his sides. He broke the kiss to nudge Michael's nose with his own and ask, "Do you ever sleep without a shirt on?" It wasn't a teasing question, he was serious - because he did. "I missed the way your skin feels against mine." After persuading Michael to ditch the shirt because he wanted to touch and kiss his torso, Luke did the same, undoing the last few buttons before he slipped out of it, shifting on the bed to get the fabric out from under himself.

Then he tugged Michael closer once more, wrapping his arms around his bare shoulders and back, and kissed him again, over and over until his lips were swollen and tingling. Breaking the string of kisses with a breathless laugh, he said, "I'm so fucking happy right now, it feels... I don't know...unreal..." Or like he shouldn't be allowed to be this happy after what a crappy week they'd had. "You're mine."

 

**MICHAEL:**  Affection for Michael always seemed to come with a certain amount of vulnerability that up until now he’d been afraid of. During the month that he and Luke had just been sleeping together, Michael had been careful not to be too sweet or too quick to be affectionate. Sometimes he had slipped, of course, but there was something almost invigorating about being allowed to be affectionate. It was going to take a few days at least for Michael to wrap his head around the idea that Luke was his and this was allowed, that this was okay. Michael drew in a soft breath as Luke spoke, telling him such sweet things that normally would have made him uncomfortable and he was surprised to find they didn’t. Michael thought Luke was giving him too much credit but he didn’t say so. “We make each other better,” he murmured softly. Michael pressed another kiss to Luke’s chest. “I hope I can live up to that but...you’re the best thing that’s happened to me too.” He meant that with every fiber of his being, and even if no one ever knew about it, Michael didn’t care. Their relationship - how Michael and Luke felt about one another - wasn’t for public consumption. It was just for them.   
  
_Kiss me again._  Michael was all to willing to oblige his boyfriend and lifted his head to meet Luke’s mouth. The kisses remained soft and sweet though they still took Michael’s breath away like always, and he shivered when Luke’s hands moved down his back and toyed with the hem of his shirt. “Sometimes,” he answered, “when it gets too hot.” Michael didn’t need much persuading to take his shirt off and he smiled at Luke before reaching behind his head to pull it over and off. Michael let the shirt fall off the side of the bed and onto the floor, and shifted to make it easier for Luke to get his shirt off as well. They kissed again, until they’re lips were swollen and they were panting for breath. Michael laughed softly when Luke blurted out his happiness, stating that Michael was his. “I am,” he agreed, “and you’re mine.” That’s all Michael wanted.   
  
Michael rested his head against Luke’s chest once more, his cheek against bare skin and the sound of Luke’s heart against his ear as warm arms wrapped around him. Michael’s finger tips slid over Luke’s chest, drawing random patterns against his skin as his eyes closed half way, and sleepiness set in. As much as he didn’t want to move, Michael also didn’t think sleeping on top of Luke would stay comfortable for long, so he shifted to lay next to his boyfriend instead. “Be my big spoon?” he asked. Michael reached behind him for Luke’s arm and dragged it across his waist. When Luke obliged, Michael pressed his back against Luke’s chest and sighed softly, content, and closed his eyes. The last thing he reached for was the blanket to pull over both of them before finally settling down, warm and safe against Luke. 

*     *     *  
  
There was a tradition on Sunday mornings in the Clifford house, which was that they had breakfast together before anyone went about their daily business. It was the one time a week that they ever really got to have a meal as a family because of their work schedules and school schedules. Michael’s father worked over an hour away and his mother being a nurse often meant she worked odd hours. Madison had school activities and Michael had a job. So when Michael woke up the next morning, still wrapped in Luke’s arms and having slept better than he had in a long time, it was to the smell of bacon frying. Michael shifted in Luke’s arms, turning over so he could face his boyfriend, and reached to brush the hair off of Luke’s forehead. Michael smiled gently and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Morning,” he mumbled. “Wake up and have breakfast with me and my family?” Michael had no plans to let Luke sneak out the window.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke slept with his legs intertwined with Michael's, arm around his waist, with the other boy's head tucked under his chin. It was the most comfortable he'd ever been; he didn't even realize how tired he was, but it took him less than ten minutes to fall asleep. The next morning he woke up to the sound of Michael shifting under the sheets, and cracked open one eye when he felt the other boy's fingers against his forehead. He smiled slightly into the kiss against his skin and made a sound, a nonverbal murmur of acknowledgment, when Michael greeted him. The guitarist suggested he wake up and have breakfast, but Luke squeezed his eyes shut in protest and buried his face against Michael's chest. He was extra lazy in the mornings.

Luke could've fallen asleep pressed up against Michael if it wasn't for that  _smell_. It smelled amazing - like bacon - and after a few minutes his stomach started to growl, and he realized he was  _starving_. Without opening his eyes, he mumbled against Michael's skin, "D'you have a toothbrush I can use? And a brush, I don't want your family to see my hair like... this..." sticking up in all directions and out of control. He hated humidity. When Michael agreed to lend him brushes, Luke made a whiny sound and rolled onto his back for a full body stretch that would make a cat proud. Then he crawled out of bed and found his jeans, yanking them back on. He slipped on his shirt, too, but didn't bother to button it as he shuffled across Michael's bedroom. He found the bathroom with his boyfriend's help, and after he washed his face and brushed his teeth, he felt a little more alive. And because he didn't have any of his usual hair product, he had to use water to try to tame it, combing through it until it was a little presentable. In that fifteen minutes, it  _finally_  hit him what it was Michael asked him to do: eat breakfast.

With his family. His parents and his sister. "They're going to know I snuck in," Luke admitted softly, nervously as he walked out of the bathroom and hesitated in the hallway. How was he supposed to explain why he did that? The food smelled so good from here but Luke wasn't sure this was such a good idea. He was worried about what Michael's parents would say, and what his sister would do when she saw them together. He wasn't ready to come out, he didn't know what to expect. "How are you so calm?" he asked.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Truthfully, Michael hadn’t really thought that far ahead. He just knew that he wasn’t ready for Luke to leave just yet but he couldn’t get out of breakfast with his family either, so of course the best option was for Luke to join them. Michael directed his boyfriend to the bathroom, got him out a spare toothbrush still in the package and then left him to change into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. Michael ran his fingers through dyed hair and by the time he got back to the bathroom, Luke was done and clearly nervous. Michael slipped past him to brush his teeth and when Luke asked how he was so calm, he shrugged. “My parents know I’m gay,” he answered, the words garbled around a mouthful of toothpaste and the brush. Michael spit the excess into the sink and rinsed his mouth and toothbrush before putting it back. When he turned to Luke, it was with a small smile. “They won’t care you stayed the night. Calum and Ashton have come over at random before.” It wasn’t a big deal to Michael but he could see it was for Luke and a soft sigh left him.   
  
Michael reached for Luke’s hands and pulled him into the bathroom with him so he could lean in and nuzzle into his neck. “We don’t have to tell them anything if you don’t want to,” he said softly. The last thing Michael wanted was to pressure Luke into something he wasn’t ready for. “They don’t have to know anything other than you crashed here last night and that we’re just friends.” Michael knew his parents didn’t care about his sexuality, though he did know his mother was mildly weary of Luke because of their history. Luckily, she was a woman who believed in second chances and if Luke made Michael happy that’s all that really mattered. Even so, Michael wasn’t going to force Luke to tell anyone anything, and as for Madison, she was a brat but Michael knew his sister loved him enough to keep this to herself.   
  
A light kiss was pressed to the side of Luke’s neck before Michael leaned back and smiled up at him. “C’mon, let’s go downstairs.” He took hold of Luke’s hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze before leading him down the stairs and into the kitchen. Right before they got there, Michael released Luke’s hand so they didn’t get any questions. The raised eyebrows, Michael was sure, would be enough for Luke to handle. “Morning,” Michael said as they came to the table. “Luke’s gonna stay for breakfast, okay?” Both of his parents and Madison’s eyes turned up to the two of them, surprise lit across all of their faces, which Michael fully expected. There was a moment of silence that filled the room before his mother spoke. “ _We’re going to need another plate then._ ” Michael felt some of the tension ease out of him when she smiled at Luke. “ _Michael, come help me get stuff on the table._ ” He glanced up at Luke and gave him a reassuring smile before doing as his mother asked.   
  
A few minutes later, the five of them were around the dining room table, Michael and Luke next to each other and a mound of food in front of them; bacon, eggs, pancakes, orange juice and coffee with French vanilla creamer. The food was passed around and Michael flicked a piece of egg at Madison when she sharked the syrup from him, which earned a sharp reprimand from his mom. They might not be a prestigious family but food fights were unacceptable. “ _You boys have a gig coming up, right?_ ” Michael’s father asked, his eyes moving between the two of them. “ _In Virginia Beach?_ ” Michael nodded, and answered with a muffled ‘yes’ around a mouthful of pancake. When he swallowed, it was so he could speak properly. “Yeah, in like two weeks. We might even have the van by then. We’re hoping.” It was easy to talk to his parents about their music since they supported him. “ _Maybe we’ll come and watch._ ” Michael smiled at his dad across the table. Under the table, he nudged Luke’s leg with his foot to make sure he was still doing okay.   
  
“ _And what about you, Luke?_ ” This from his mother. “ _How are you liking being in the band?_ ” Michael felt any tension about how his parents would treat Luke leave him as he watched them talk. His parents were treating him like they would Calum or Ashton, like he’d been a fixture in Michael’s life all along. Michael would have to remember to thank them later for being cool about this.

 

**LUKE:**  Michael said his parents knew he was gay like it was the easiest thing in the world, and Luke felt a little envious - and worried, because they didn't know  _he_  was... not straight (Luke wasn't sure if he was gay or not, he was still working out what made the most sense). He nodded absently in response to Michael's reassurance that it wasn't weird he showed up, that Calum and Ashton did the same thing, then the guitarist tugged him back into the bathroom. He closed his eyes at the press of Michael's mouth against his throat, tilting his head into it with a slow exhale. Michael promised they didn't have to tell his parents anything, that all they had to say was 'just friends' and Luke nodded slightly. He wasn't sure he wanted to say that either. He wanted to be more honest than that - but this was so fucking scary. Michael was right. "Maybe we can see how it goes?" Luke wasn't ashamed, but he was worried about other people finding out - like his own parents, before he was ready for it. "Thank you." Just knowing he had an out made him feel better, less trapped, less nervous about this.

Luke held tight to Michael's hand as they walked downstairs together and into the kitchen - and he missed the warmth of it when Michael let him go. He followed his bandmate to the breakfast table, grateful that Michael spoke before he had to, and all of a sudden he felt really self-conscious because he knew everyone was looking at him. Luke glanced at each of Michael's family members in turn, offering a slight smile in greeting. The silence only lasted a beat but to Luke, it felt like an hour, and he let out a short, relieved breath when Michael's mother finally spoke, mentioning another plate. She smiled at him and Luke felt even more encouraged. "Thank you, Mrs. Clifford. Mr. Clifford." While Michael helped set the table, Luke sat down.

He felt uncomfortable about it (should he have offered to help to? It was so weird to him that they cooked together - and set their own table), but instead he made conversation with Madison. He asked her how school was going, the usual stuff. Michael sat down next to him once everything was on the table: bacon, eggs, pancakes, juice, coffee and creamer. It looked pretty good and smelled even better. But it was the atmosphere of sitting around a table together and sharing a meal that... hell, he thought this kind of stuff only happened on TV. It was nothing like his house. Luke cut himself a piece of pancake and it tasted fluffy, awesome. Mixing in the eggs and bacon, it was even better.

"This is really good, Mrs. Clifford," he stated before reaching for the juice. "I love pancakes." He didn't eat them very much at home. Luke watched the way Michael interacted with his sister and his parents, fascinated. It was so different from what he expected, and even though he knew that the Cliffords were supportive of 5sos, it was completely different from hearing Michael's father  _ask_  about their upcoming gigs. He even knew where it was. Luke's eyes widened when Mr. Clifford added that they might come and watch the gig - they'd really go all the way to Virginia Beach just for the band? Luke was startled by the nudge of Michael's foot against his leg, but he offered a sideways smile to the other boy, meeting his gaze briefly. Everything about this morning felt like a Twilight Zone episode to Luke.

But it was a good one and he glanced up at Mrs. Clifford when she asked him about the band. It didn't sound or look like the kind of trap  _his_  mother would set by asking a question like that (she never would), and Luke found himself relaxing before he answered - and being honest about it. "I love it," he said earnestly, "I always look forward to practice, sometimes it doesn't even feel like work because we have such a good time. It's... really cool of you to let us use your garage. We appreciate it so much." Luke didn't think he was saying anything Calum and Ashton wouldn't agree with. His parents would  _never_  go for that.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Michael smiled faintly to himself as Luke and his parents chatted, about the food, about how Luke liked the band. The tension that had wound itself around Luke seemed to ease slightly and he was glad for it. And Michael was really happy that his parents weren’t treating Luke any different than they would Calum or Ashton though he was sure there would be numerous questions about this later. Michael was only half prepared to answer them. It would depend on what happened with Luke during this time with his family. At one point, Michael reached under the table as conspicuously as possible to give Luke’s thigh a reassuring squeeze. He was doing great and Michael could see he was already charming the Cliffords. Even Madison had opened up to chat with him when she’d been previously too nervous to do so. The warm, tingly feeling that spread through Michael’s whole body was a strange but welcome sensation. He found himself thinking that this was a scenario he could get used to.   
  
When they’d all finished eating, Michael nudged Luke and said, “You can come help me with the dishes. Maddie can clear the table.” Michael stood from his chair and went into the kitchen to make sure the dishwasher was cleared out and ready for a new load. A silly sort of grin crossed his features because the last time he and Luke had been alone in his kitchen, they’d been half naked and kissing each other stupid. Michael had to shake himself from the memory lest he end up with an awkward boner with his family all present just through the doorway. He turned to Luke and smiled at him. “See, it wasn’t so bad right? I think my parents actually kind of like you. Not that it’s hard or anything when you use that natural charm.” It had been okay, better than okay and Michael couldn’t be more grateful for it. He was going to have to buy his parents a gift or something.   
  
Madison came in with an armful of dishes and Michael turned on the sink. “I’m assuming you’ve never washed a dish in your life but lucky for you, we have a dishwasher so,” he said, and pulled open the dishwasher door, “they get rinsed and put in here.” Michael gestured for Luke to grab a plate and rinse it. “Plates and bowls here. Silverware here.” He pointed out each dish’s place. “And cups and glasses on top.” Michael scraped any leftover food off the plates and other dishes and handed them to Luke to get rinsed and put in the dishwasher. Then they took care of the pans and and the griddle that were used. Michael showed Luke how to put detergent in the compartment and turn it on. Then he wiped down the counters and when he was finally done, Michael leaned against the sink and crossed his arms over his chest. “Life without maids to do all the dirty work is super fun right?” he laughed.   
  
It was quiet in the house, which meant his family had wandered off to do their own things and Michael had a time alone with Luke. So he took hold of his boyfriend’s belt loops and tugged him forward, tilting his head up to press a gentle kiss to Luke’s mouth. “Thank you for staying,” he whispered against them. Michael was going in for another kiss when he heard the sliding door off the kitchen open and shifted away from Luke. A moment later, both of his parents appeared and looked confused. “ _Why is there a ladder outside of your window, Michael?_ ” His mother asked. Dammit. Michael had forgotten all about the ladder and he glanced quickly at Luke, scrambling in his head for an explanation. “Uh...it’s kinda complicated…” Fuck, this was going to be a hard story to sell whatever it was.

 

**LUKE:**  After breakfast Michael nudged him and said something about 'helping with the dishes'. "Okay..." He wasn't sure what that meant and it occurred to him that no one in his family had ever cleared the dinner table before. They had staff for a reason. It was their job to do the clean-up,  _not_  Luke's. Since Luke wasn't at his house, he obeyed and followed the other boy into the kitchen. As nice as Michael's family was, they still made him a little nervous because for some reason, Luke felt like he was walking around with a big stamp on his forehead reading  _KINDA GAY_  now that he had a boyfriend. Michael turned to him and smiled, pointing out that breakfast wasn't so bad. Luke brightened when he added that the Cliffords liked him, that he charmed them. "I like your family a lot," he said. He  _wanted_  to impress them.

Michael's sister walked into the kitchen with a stack of dirty dishes and Luke shot a bemused look to his boyfriend when he turned on the sink. In theory he knew how all this worked because he watched TV and he wasn't an alien, but he didn't think he'd actually have to  _do_  it. "Why do you have to rinse them if they're going in the dishwasher?" Luke asked, picking up one of the plates by its edges and tipping it under the stream of water. He did that with each of the plates after Michael scraped the uneaten food off, trying not to touch any sticky parts, then the other pans and the silverware until it was put away. He immediately stuck his hands under the water to wash them off, grimacing. Michael was still wiping down the counters, and then his boyfriend made a crack about 'life without maids'. "It's disgusting," Luke muttered in complaint. Touching dirty stuff that people had eaten off of or put in their mouths was gross. He didn't even want to touch his own silverware.

Now that the water wasn't running anymore, Luke could hear that the house was quiet. He smiled at Michael when the other boy tugged him forward, slipping his own hands over his bandmate's shoulders as they kissed. Luke only pulled away at the sound of the sliding door, turning towards the sound of voices: Michael's parents, asking about the ladder.  _Shit_. Luke's eyes widened but he couldn't think of a good lie, so he blurted out as his boyfriend fumbled over the words, "It's mine. Well, it's not  _mine_ , I rented it - that and the truck by your mailbox." Which sounded so fucking weird now that he was saying it out loud, but last night it seemed like a really good idea, "I, um, I wanted to see Michael." He didn't bother explaining that the reason why he didn't call or show up at a reasonable hour like a normal person was because they weren't on speaking terms... it was a really long story and probably TMI for anybody's parents, but Luke knew he had to say  _something_.

"We're dating now," he said suddenly, edging closer to the other boy and reaching for his hand like it was a lifeline - because he felt like he was going to pass out, "I was... you know, making this big gesture... it was supposed to be romantic," he felt really self-conscious about it now, "So he'd... go out with me. Or... I mean, it's not like I was tricking him into going out with me..." Was he making himself sound worse? Luke, for some reason, could not fucking stop talking now."I just... I... really like him, you, Michael. And, um, fuck. Sorry." Cursing in front of his boyfriend's parents was probably not impressive either. "My parents don't know and they'd... it... please don't tell them," he added hastily.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Michael really, really should have been quicker on his feet with a story because when Luke took over and blurted everything out to his parents, he was sort of awestruck. He gaped at Luke for a moment, wondering where this sudden streak of honesty had come from because Michael hadn’t expected it. Michael hadn’t had a boyfriend before, not really, no one that he would have brought home to his parents despite the fact they knew he was gay. Clearly, Luke was drowning and the way his boyfriend reached for his hand spurred Michael into action, cringing faintly when Luke dropped the word ‘fuck’ in front of his mom and dad. They weren’t crazy about their kids cursing in front of them even if they knew Michael and his friends did elsewhere. “There’s just a lot that’s happened over the past few months,” he explained, giving Luke’s hand a reassuring squeeze. “This isn’t really how I wanted you guys to find out but...guess the cat’s out of the bag.” Michael would have preferred to have given it a few weeks before his parents learned about his relationship. Maybe having Luke over a few more times for breakfast again or something like that but that wasn’t meant to be, apparently.   
  
A nervous laugh left him and Michael moved his free hand to rub at the back of his neck awkwardly. “Luke was trying to be romantic when he asked me out, that’s all. I have the flowers on my desk to prove it.” He could feel his face turning beet red. This was awful and Michael really hoped his parents didn’t think Luke was being some kind of creepy guy or anything like that. Admittedly, Luke’s plea for them not to tell his parents broke Michael’s heart a little. He was so very lucky to have the parents he did and Michael was thanking the stars for that. “You won’t tell the Hemmings, right?” he asked, looking back and forth between his parents. For a moment he was concerned even if he didn’t think his parents would out Luke like that. “ _No, of course we won’t tell them._ ” Mr. Clifford answered, his brow knit. “ _It’s not our place to tell that story. That’s Luke’s decision to make._ ” Michael let out a relieved breath. He could have hugged his dad so tight in that moment, along with his mom. “ _Though the next time you come over, you could just use the front door._ ” Mrs. Clifford added.   
  
Michael laughed, a short burst of sound and shook his head. This couldn’t have really gone any more awkwardly than it did but he was grateful that his parents had taken the news well. Now that they knew, Luke hoped he wouldn’t be so tense around them anymore. Michael’s parents said they were going to the farmer’s market across town and Michael said goodbye to them before they left. When he got home from work, he was going to have to have a conversation with Madison, whom Michael had noticed peeking around the corner the whole time. Michael trusted that she wouldn’t say anything to anyone because it wasn’t a topic to be taken lightly.   
  
It was just a little while later that Michael took Luke’s hand and led him up to his room. There was still an hour before he had to be to work and Michael wanted to spend it with Luke. He closed the door behind them and flopped onto the bed, letting out a heavy breath. “Wow, that was...something…” Michael grinned at Luke as his boyfriend flopped next to him. “You just came out to my parents. How does it feel?” He wanted Luke to know that he was there for him, that Michael would do his best to always be supportive. So he turned on his side to face Luke and slipped a hand up his chest to rest over his heart. It was still beating so fast. “Relax. Everything’s going to be okay.” Michael said softly before he dropped a kiss to Luke’s clothed shoulder.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke felt like even more of an idiot when Michael admitted to his parents  _this_  wasn't the way he wanted them to find out, though he was reassured by the tight grip his bandmate had of his hand. It was the only thing that reminded him it was okay to breathe. Luke nodded gratefully, releasing a shaking breath, when Mr. Clifford agreed that they wouldn't tell his parents about him dating Michael. He ducked his head with an embarrassed half-smile when Mrs. Clifford suggested using the front door next time. "I will," he promised, swallowing his heart back down into his body. He barely acknowledged Michael's parents when they explained that they were leaving to go to the Farmer's Market, and Luke still felt numb as his boyfriend led him upstairs to his bedroom. He had never been more relieved to be anywhere in his life - with only Michael, door closed, not thinking about what he'd done.

Luke sprawled back on the bed, letting out a low groan when Michael asked him how it felt to come out to his parents. The other boy told him to relax and he closed his eyes, nodding slightly, when Michael promised everything would be okay. "I really wish I didn't sound so creepy," he blurted out regretfully. Usually he was so smooth with girls, with their parents, but when it came to Michael he was a hot mess. He knew it was dumb to climb through Michael's window like this was a chick flick or something, but he guessed that was the point: that he didn't  _care_  about his reputation or being cool, that he would make a complete ass of himself (sober) to convince Michael that he really liked him. "Now your parents think I'm a weirdo."  _Perfect_.

Then it occurred to him what he was upset about, and  _that_ made him smile slightly. He blinked open his eyes and tilted his head to look down at Michael. "I'm more worried about them not liking me than about them knowing I'm... kinda gay or... pansexual or bisexual, I'm not sure." It wasn't like he and Ashton got into a whole lot of detail while they were wasted. But the  _good_  thing was that he was stressed out about normal shit that you get stressed out about when you date somebody, not stressed out about somebody knowing he liked guys. "It feels... okay, good." Though it did make him want to confess something to Michael, "They're not the first people I told. Ash knows too. I told him last week, when we went up to Jersey." It went better with the drummer, but that was probably because he was drunk and didn't give a crap.

Luke rolled onto his side to face Michael, mirroring the other boy before he reached out to touch him, sliding his fingers into his green hair. "I... I am so... into you, Michael," he said softly, "I've never felt this way about anyone."

 

**MICHAEL:**  “Trust me, they probably don’t think you’re a weirdo. Look at who there kid is,” Michael laughed. He wasn’t exactly the most normal teenager to exist though he could be a lot worse, so his parents were probably pretty grateful that he wasn’t a monster. Michael could tell that Luke was thinking something and when he spoke, admitting that he had told Ashton about being queer, Michael was a little surprised. He hadn’t even known they’d gone to Jersey together. Then again, Michael hadn’t seen Ashton much lately and he felt guilty about it. He wasn’t going to tell Luke what he knew though or what Calum had told him. “Oh,” he nodded. It was all Michael could think to say because he was afraid if he said too much he would be betraying someone’s trust. So it was better to just not talk about Calum and Ashton at the moment even if Michael really wanted to tell Luke everything.   
  
Luke turned to face him on his side, and Michael closed his eyes as fingers moved through his hair. A soft sigh left him and he felt more content than he had in a long time, so relaxed and at ease. It was a stark difference from how he’d been feeling the entire week; sad, anxious, unsure of what was going to happen with the band. Now all of that seemed to be a distant memory with Luke so close and touching him. Michael loved every moment of it. And when Luke spoke, Michael opened his eyes and felt his heartbeat start to pick up. “You haven’t?” It was a silly question but he’d just blurted it out. Some part of him, Michael assumed, needed to hear something like that from Luke because he was still having trouble wrapping his head around the idea. It felt surreal. “I’m into you too,” he replied softly. Michael leaned forward and kissed Luke gently, affectionately, and when it was over he pressed his forehead to his boyfriend’s. Michael closed his eyes once more and just enjoyed the warmth from Luke’s body, and being so close to him.   
  
Michael’s fingertips moved over Luke’s chest and along his shoulder to the side of his neck, just touching and memorizing the feeling of his skin. A faint smile played over his features and he bumped his nose against Luke’s playfully. “I think this could be really good,” Michael murmured. He slipped a leg between Luke’s so he could scoot closer to him. “Even if no one here ever finds out about us, I don’t care. They’re not important.” Graduation wasn’t that far away. They could keep a secret for the next seven months and then when they got to Los Angeles, everything could be different. Michael wanted to be able to be proud to be Luke’s boyfriend without the worry about any fall out. “You make me happy so that’s all that matters.”

 

**LUKE:**  Michael kissed him and Luke closed his eyes, tilting his head into the press of his boyfriend's mouth to his own, soft and sweet. He loved the callouses on Michael's fingertips against the side of his neck, and how distinctive his touch was from the girls he'd been with, no acrylic nails or Taylor Swift perfume that made his head hurt. Luke blinked at the playful brush of Michael's nose against his own and he smiled back at the other boy. He was encouraged by what Michael said, about things being really good, one leg slipping between Luke's to bring the two of them closer together. Michael said he didn't care if no one else knew about them because it didn't matter; no one else's opinion mattered, and they were so close to getting out of Manassas where they could do what they wanted.

Luke couldn't wait to move out, away from his parents and all the stuff he owed them. Part of him was nervous about L.A. because he knew they would be pissed, that they wouldn't pay for it, and he wasn't sure what he would do then. Would he have to get a job?  _Music_  was his job. This was all stuff to think about later, after graduation, because right now he just wanted to be here with Michael - especially when he was saying sweet things about the way Luke made him feel. "You make me happy too," he murmured, trailing his fingertips across the curve of Michael's collarbone, before slipping over the curve of his shoulder to his side, his waist, his hip. Luke leaned forward to kiss the spot where Michael's neck met his shoulder.

He tugged down Michael's shirt to get at the spot he wanted, then Luke let his lips work their way up to that spot beneath his ear, sucking at the skin gently, running over the redness with his tongue before moving on. In some distant part of his mind he wondered if Michael had to work today -  _probably_  - and whether or not he cared if his boyfriend sported hickeys in public. He curled one arm around Michael's waist as he sucked at his neck, fingers absently running along the width of his back through his shirt. Breaking the string of lovely red marks running along the side of his throat, Luke nuzzled into Michael's hair and murmured, "You treat me like more than just a Hemmings." Even when he hated him, Michael treated him differently than most people - it used to drive him crazy, but now he loved it. "I like myself most when I'm with you." That's what he meant when he said Michael made him want to be better, and he  _felt_  better with him, and Calum and Ashton, than he did around the people he used to call his friends.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my lovelies! I know you've all been waiting awhile for this update and I'm truly sorry we've kept you waiting! I hope you'll understand and be patient with us over the next little while when it comes to updating. We appreciate you so much and love that you love the story we're telling! Enjoy!

**LUKE:**  Going to school on Monday was weird, not only because he was dodging questions about the breakup with Amber but also because he had to go back to treating Michael the way he did before. It was a little easier because he had come out to Ashton (even though they never talked about it) and Michael's family, and even though he almost had a panic attack in their kitchen it went pretty well. For some reason he thought people would just  _know_  but no one did. Michael's sister didn't tell anyone. Which was good because Luke felt like a lot of shit had happened in a really short amount of time and he wanted to be able to enjoy being with Michael without the whole fucking world getting involved, and messing it up, or having an opinion. Things were better after school because Luke liked to drive Michael home, and kiss him in the car, and now that the two of them were on speaking terms again, they had band practice too.

Their next gig was less than two weeks away which meant this weekend was free. Luke guessed they could have spent that time practicing, or hanging out at Michael's house, but it'd been a week since they made up and that just so happened to coincide with the All Time Low concert in D.C. Luke wanted to go with Michael and he decided to surprise the other boy with the tickets. He asked him if he'd be free on Saturday night and, in contrast to the fucking disaster that was the marina trip, he  _told_  Michael they'd be going to D.C., just the two of them. He didn't tell the other boy specifically why, but he promised that he would before they got in the car. Luke showed up at a quarter to five in Converse, a half-unbuttoned shirt, and the tightest pair of black skinny jeans he owned. He knocked on the Cliffords' front door and waited for Michael. He was grinning stupidly by the time he saw the other boy. "I figured I'd use the front door today," he joked - instead of climbing in through the window.

"Check it out," Luke pulled a white envelope from his back pocket and he gave it to Michael, eager to see his reaction to the tickets which were VIP and right in front of the band. Cost him... well, who cared? Didn't matter. "Wanna go? I was thinking it could be our first date."

 

**MICHAEL:**  Things were a bit strange following the reconciliation in Michael’s bedroom and the morning Luke had spent with him and his family. Maybe they felt strange because they were smooth, and things seemed to be falling back into place. Even though they couldn’t be openly affectionate with one another in public, just knowing Luke’s heart belonged to him was enough for Michael. Luke even managed to dodge questions about his sudden (or not so sudden) break up with Amber. It was usual for people to gossip about why Luke had broken up with her though it wasn’t for the reasons they believed. Luke was not dating another girl but Michael would rather they believe that then know the truth. It also seemed like Luke spent more time with him, Ashton and Calum than he did his other friends but Michael wasn’t necessarily surprised. None of them were genuine. Not like the four of them were. Michael didn’t think he’d ever smiled so much his entire school career.   
  
Michael liked that Luke drove him home after school, that they kissed in the driveway and it was hard to wrench himself out of the car when all he wanted was more of his boyfriend. Michael had thought about calling out of work twice just so he could hang out with Luke but he didn’t because the band needed the money for the van. So Michael had sucked it up and gone to work but he texted with Luke as often as he could. The weekend was free and they weren’t able to organize band practice because Ashton had to watch his siblings and Calum’s sister, Mali, was home from college. Luke told Michael that he wanted to take him to D.C. but hadn’t told him up front why, only promised that it wasn’t going to be a repeat of the day with his parents. Michael had a time to be ready by and he had procrastinated, mostly because he wanted to see what Luke was wearing before he made a decision. This was a big deal - the two of them going to D.C. together for a date - and Michael wanted to put a little effort into his appearance. Depending on where they were going, of course. Michael had clothes everywhere and groaned faintly to himself about how nothing seemed like a great idea when he heard the knock on the front door. Michael bolted from his room and down the stairs to fling it open a moment later. Luke looked perfect and Michael kind of wanted to kiss him and kind of wanted to punch him at the same time.   
  
“How kind of you,” Michael retorted with a grin. He stepped back to allow Luke to come in when Luke pulled a white envelope from his back pocket and handed it to him. Michael raised a brow as he opened the envelope and pulled out the two tickets inside, which were All Time Low tickets. Not only that, but they were VIP tickets that must have cost a fortune and Michael looked up at Luke with the biggest grin. “No fucking way! How did you get these? It’s been sold out for forever!” Michael had wanted to go so badly but he hadn’t been able to afford the tickets, on top of it being somewhat frivolous when the band needed new equipment. “Hell yeah, I want to go!” Michael laughed and threw his arms around Luke’s neck, leaning up to kiss him once, twice, three times. An excited (and albeit embarrassing) giggle left Michael as he nuzzled into Luke’s neck. “This is the best first date ever. Thank you.” This night was shaping up to be better than Michael could have expected.   
  
Michael leaned away from his boyfriend and grinned at him. “I have to figure out something to wear. I won’t take long, promise.” Michael took hold of Luke’s hand and practically dragged him up the stairs and into his room. “This is not fair because you look...amazing and I don’t know if I can stand up.” Michael rifled through the clothes on his bed, and finally pulled out a pair of skinny jeans that weren’t ripped and a plain black t-shirt. Michael finished it off with a pair of black Converse and a black denim jacket with the sleeves rolled up. “Guess this’ll have to do.” At least his hair hadn’t started to fade and it was still the bright green a week later. “Do I look okay for you to walk next to?” Michael grinned at Luke.

 

**LUKE:** Luke grinned as Michael looked up at him, sliding his hands into his back pockets with a playful shrug when his boyfriend pointed out that the tickets had been sold out for a long time. It was really hard keeping it a secret from him but totally worth it because he looked so fucking happy. Luke had gotten the tickets because the owner of the venue knew his father, so he got a really good deal a few weeks ago. He actually planned to ask Michael two weeks ago, but after what happened at the marina, he wasn't sure what to do with the tickets. "Oh good," he teased, feigning relief when Michael said he  _did_  want to go, and he wrapped his own arms around his boyfriend's waist, accepting each of the kisses with a grin. "I'm really glad you're excited," Luke was too. Not only were they getting the hell out of Manassas, but they were going to go to an awesome concert with a lot of free swag and some of the best seats.

Michael leaned back and explained he had to get something to wear, and Luke laughed as the other boy pulled him upstairs and into your room. "Shut up," he said lightly, dismissing his boyfriend's fear of not being able to stand up next to him, "You always look good." He raised an eyebrow at the clothes scattered all over the bedroom but to be honest, Luke thought it was really cute. He leaned against the desk and watched Michael change, arms folded over his chest, and he straightened when the guitarist settled on an outfit and asked him what he thought. Luke crossed the room to his boyfriend and slipped his hands beneath the jacket. "You look so good I can't wait for you to take it all off again," he reassured Michael, leaning in for a kiss. This time it lingered, as he parted Michael's lips with his tongue and pulled him close. Luke loved kissing him.

"Okay," he managed breathlessly, breaking the kiss and sucking his own bottom lip between his teeth. "To be continued. Let's get out of here. We can grab dinner by the arena." It was Capital One on F Street. He led his boyfriend down the stairs and out to the driveway, double checking they had the tickets, phones, and IDs before getting in the car. It was a forty-five minute drive, and most of that was listening to All Time Low, comparing favorite songs, and at the stoplights, Luke showing Michael where they'd be sitting in relation to the stage on a map of the arena saved to his phone. Luke found parking for twenty bucks a block away from the venue, and as soon as he got out of the car, he rounded the front, meeting Michael by the passenger's side. "I don't think we're gonna run into anybody who knows us," he murmured, stepping in front of the other boy. And even though it wasn't about being outed, not to people they knew, Luke was still a little nervous, pulse speeding up, when he reached for Michael's hand, interlacing their fingers. Then he leaned in for a slow kiss.

By the time it was broken, Luke was blushing but also excited - about the concert, about being out with his boyfriend. He loved touching Michael, and the way Michael touched him. "I picked the entertainment, so  _you_  pick dinner," he suggested to Michael. "What do you feel like?"

 

**MICHAEL:**  There was a sort of jittery excitement that moved through Michael when Luke kissed him, and it was enough for him to think for a brief moment that even if they just did this all night long he would be okay with it. Michael wasn’t the first to break the kiss and when Luke did, breathless, he laughed softly. “Okay, let’s do it.” Michael followed Luke out to the car and the next forty five minutes was spent in comfortable conversation, mostly about the band they were about to see live, and a few other things. Michael’s hand found its way across the center console of the car more than once just so he could touch Luke, a reminder that he was here and this was real.  _They_  were real. They parked closer to the venue than Michael would have expected and once he was out of the car, Luke was there in front of him with a sort of nervous energy rolling off of him in waves. The implication was clear; they weren’t in their hometown anymore and this was a big city where the likelihood of them running into anyone they knew was slim. It meant that maybe they could actually act like a couple for once. Luke took hold of his hand and laced their fingers together and it was like Michael could feel a transference of that energy. It made him giddy, excited and he couldn’t help the grin on his lips that was quickly covered by a kiss. Michael hummed softly into it, his free hand raising to cup Luke’s cheek lovingly.   
  
The kiss was broken a moment later and Michael couldn’t help but laugh. “Holy shit. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you blush before.” Michael was aware that Luke had told him to choose where they ate but he was slightly enamored at the moment with the pink hue over his boyfriend’s cheeks. “Wait, wait...this has to be documented.” Michael pulled his phone out of his back pocket and pulled the camera up, and tapped the icon at the top to turn it around so he could take a selfie of them. Tilting his head up, Michael pressed a kiss to Luke’s cheek and hit the button to take the picture. It was something he wouldn’t be able to share with the world but Michael didn’t need to. It was just for them. “I dunno,” he said, feigning thoughtfulness, “I guess we’re kinda cute.” Michael showed Luke the picture and smiled at him. “Kinda.” It was the first selfie they’d taken as a couple and Michael wanted to keep it locked away in his memory forever.   
  
“Okay, now we can get food.” Michael honestly wasn’t sure what he felt like and he held tight to Luke’s hand as they made their way down the street that led toward the arena. D.C. had a lot more options than Manassas. When something finally caught his eye - Toki Underground - Michael looked back at Luke with a shrug. “Have you ever been to a ramen restaurant?” He had not, but Michael assumed it wasn’t like the packaged crap you could get for thirty cents at Target. “Let’s give it a try.” Michael tugged Luke into the restaurant and a moment later, they were seated and he was looking around at the modern contemporary aesthetic it had. “I’m paying,” he blurted, eyes focused on his boyfriend across the table. “Don’t argue, okay? You bought the tickets and you drove so...the least I can do is buy dinner.” The last thing Michael wanted was to take from Luke and give nothing back. That wasn’t how their relationship was going to work, and Michael wasn’t going to be like the people in Luke’s life before him and the other guys.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke felt his face grow even warmer when Michael pointed it out, and he rolled his eyes when his boyfriend said it had to be 'documented'. "Michael, come on..." he protested half-heartedly, shaking his head at the sight of the phone. But he didn't resist the selfie and couldn't fight the smile when he felt the press of Michael's lips against his cheek. He glanced from Michael to the phone screen when he casually remarked that they were 'kinda' cute. "Kinda," he repeated with a smile. There was something about seeing it on screen that Luke loved, and he tugged Michael closer by the collar of his jacket to kiss him again. "Send that to me." He definitely wanted it. Now that Michael was done embarrassing him about his blush, Luke followed him from the parking lot to the sidewalk across the street, dodging traffic that Manassas never had.

Luke shrugged when Michael mentioned ramen, because he'd never been to a restaurant like that. "Sounds good." It was hard to go wrong with ramen, right? Anything they got in D.C. was bound to taste better than the stuff at home. Luke was looking around the interior of the restaurant, but he glanced back to Michael when his boyfriend said he was paying. He opened his mouth to object -  _he_  asked Michael on the date, so he didn't mind paying for it especially because he knew Michael was saving for the big van - but he was told not to argue.

"Okay," he agreed finally, smiling slightly. He couldn't remember the last time he went out with someone who offered to pay for anything, and usually he didn't mind because... well, that was just how it had always been. Things were different with Michael. "This place is really cool," he changed the subject away from money now that it was settled, "Good choice- and hey, your hair matches." He liked the wood and the bright art, some of which was the same shade of bright green as Michael's hair. "Japan is so awesome." It was one of those places Luke had always,  _always_  wanted to visit. "We should definitely go there, you know, on our first world tour." Luke smiled at Michael before he turned to his menu, and by the time the server came by, he was ready to order. He got a "Tawainese rootbear" and a dish, "curry chicken hakata", which sounded spicy as hell.

After the server left, and it was just the two of them, Luke looked across the table and thought Michael was the most amazing person he'd ever met. And he was  _so_  into him, sometimes it felt so intense it freaked him out (and it definitely wasn't anything he was confident telling the other boy, not yet anyway). "You look really hot tonight," Luke blurted out suddenly, and he could feel himself blushing again but he ignored it as best he could, hooking his foot behind Michael's gently. Being able to touch Michael in public made him want to take full advantage of it. "What's the first thing you're gonna do when we get to L.A.?" It was 'when'  _not_  'if'.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Michael brightened at the idea of going to Japan and nodded emphatically. “Hell fucking yeah we should. I’ve always wanted to go to Japan. Just...everything about it seems so cool and especially their nerd culture.” A laugh left him, green eyes bright as he looked across the table at Luke. It’s still a bit surreal that they were here on a date, and that if Michael wanted to reach across the table to hold Luke’s hand he could without worry. The thought crossed his mind, which Michael pushed to the back of his mind when the server appeared at their table. Not totally sure what to expect from the menu, he let Luke order first and when it was his turn, he made a last minute decision and ordered the Kagoshima ramen. It seemed a safe choice. Michael also ordered the Thai tea, mostly because it came with whipped cream on the top and he was eager to see how it stood up to boba, which he’d only had once before.  
  
The server left and Michael felt Luke’s eyes on him, so he glanced across the table at his boyfriend and gave him a little half smile. He was about to ask Luke what he was staring at when Luke blurted out that he was hot. Michael felt his cheeks heat up and a somewhat nervous laugh came out of him as his eyes averted to the table. “Thanks. So do you.” Michael didn’t think he was all that hot but he wasn’t going to cause a fuss about the compliment. Luke thought he was attractive so he wasn’t going to spend time questioning it. He felt Luke’s foot hook around his and raised a brow at him though he didn’t move from the touch either. Maybe this was easier than holding hands across the table, just in case someone got a stick up their ass and wanted to start some shit. “The first thing? Fuck, I’m not even sure.” Michael had thought about moving to L.A. time and time again, but he’d never actually thought about the first thing he would want to do. “Maybe actually see the Hollywood Walk of Fame so I can piss on Donald Trump’s star,” he laughed, only half joking. Michael didn’t get too heavy into politics because there was a lot of it he didn’t understand but he really, really hated that man. “What do you want to do first?” There were so many things Michael wanted to experience, and he didn’t want to experience them alone. He wanted to experience them with the guys, as a band, as friends. Michael wanted to experience things with Luke and lock those memories away. The idea of moving so far away from home without his family was both exhilarating and terrifying all at once, but Michael knew as long as he had his three bandmates he would be fine. It almost made him laugh to realize how far they had come as a band and friends in just a few short weeks. Calum and Ashton had been right when they’d told Michael they needed Luke. Luke was the missing piece of the puzzle and he fit perfectly. It was a perspective Michael wished he’d had sooner but there was no point in worrying about that now. They were going to move forward together, the two of them along with Calum and Ashton and Michael couldn’t be more thrilled about it.   
  
Against his earlier concerns about being too touchy with Luke, Michael reached across the table and took Luke’s hand in his own. He turned it over in his own hand, palm up, and Michael started to trace the lines of Luke’s palm with his index finger. “I’m really happy to be here with you tonight, Luke,” he said softly. It had only been a week since the two of them had been any kind of official but it had been the best week Michael had ever had. He traced each one of Luke’s fingers playfully before turning his own hand over and lacing their fingers together for a moment. Michael gave Luke’s hand a gentle squeeze before he let it go when he saw their server coming toward their table in his periphery. Michael thanked the girl as she set their drinks down in front of them. Once she left, he unwrapped his straw and immediately went for the whipped cream on top of the drink, scooping it into his mouth. Though the next time he did so, Michael held it out for Luke. “Try it?”

 

**LUKE:**  Luke grinned broadly as Michael blushed, turning pink under the restaurant lighting. He leaned forward with his elbows on the table, wondering what Michael would come up with - and the last thing he fucking expected was his boyfriend to want to see the Walk of Fame in Hollywood so he could piss on Donald Trump's star. Luke laughed hard - and it took him almost a minute to recover enough to answer the question. "Hard to top that," he admitted in amusement, "I want to go to the beach, Santa Monica. I'll make you come with me, put a sun hat on you," he teased. Every time he thought about what he was going do after graduation, it made him dizzy, his heart speeding up. They were really going to Los Angeles and they would make it.

No one ever got what they wanted by playing it safe, and Luke knew they'd never get any further than Warped Tour if all they did were local shows in Virginia and Maryland. They had to go to California. Michael reached across the table for his hand and Luke smiled, shivering slightly at how good it felt to have his boyfriend's fingers tracing the lines of his palm. He met Michael's gaze when the other boy spoke. "Me too." It made him happy that  _Michael_  was happy. His bandmate let go of his hand and Luke was disappointed until he noticed the server in their periphery, setting down the drinks. Luke unwrapped his straw but forgot to put it in the root beer; he glanced across the table and Michael was sucking whipped cream off the end of his straw, and it was really... sexy. He wasn't even trying and it still turned Luke on. Michael offered another taste of whipped cream to him and Luke nodded, leaning across the table to suck it from the end of the straw. And then, since he was already over there, he reached for Michael and pulled him into a kiss. It was short, almost no tongue (he remembered they were in a restaurant), but tasted sweet.

Luke was grinning - like they'd gotten away with something - as he sat back down on his side of the table, but he really wanted more. "We should get some whipped cream after the show," he suggested, "It'd be more fun to lick it off you than a straw. Would you be into that?" Luke was having a hard time distracting himself from how attractive Michael was right now and they had stuff to do tonight... not... having sex in a ramen restaurant bathroom, which he'd never done and he was sure it wasn't as great as it sounded at the moment, but whatever. The train of thought  _really_ wasn't helping. He couldn't get enough of Michael. He wanted him all the time. "Have you..." Luke realized he'd never asked, and he didn't know, "... dated a lot of guys before?" Before him, he meant. Not that Luke was jealous.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Of course Luke wanted to go to the beach. That didn’t shock Michael at all and he made a face before becoming distracted by the whipped cream. The look on Luke’s face made him flush slightly and he almost asked what was wrong but closed his mouth when Luke sucked the whipped cream off the straw and then kissed him. It was brief and Luke’s tongue barely flicked over his bottom lip before it was broken. It left Michael’s heart racing and he felt hot all of a sudden. Something crossed Luke’s face akin to smugness and Michael laughed softly. He assumed the same things that were running through his head, were running through his boyfriend’s as well. It wasn’t surprising, really. They hadn’t had sex in two weeks because for a week they hadn’t been talking and then for the last week things had been busy. Michael hadn’t really wanted to rush back into sleeping with Luke the first night they started dating, but he was certainly feeling the itch at the moment. But they had things to do and a concert to see and Michael drew in a breath to calm his nerves. “Jesus, you aren’t making it easy to not think about sex right now,” he muttered, rolling his eyes slightly. “But yeah, I think I could get into that or like...edible body glitter or something…” Michael had never thought about that before but it sounded fun.   
  
The conversation took an abrupt turn and Michael blinked at the question because he hadn’t been expecting it. Since he was a little evil, Michael wanted to make Luke sweat a little bit and he shrugged casually. “Oh yeah, lots of dudes. You should see my Grindr profile and all the messages I get on it,” he said matter-of-fact. There was no trace of irony in his tone as he spoke, and Michael kept his expression neutral so as not to tip Luke off that he was fibbing right away. Granted, he only lasted about two seconds after Luke’s expression fell before he laughed and shook his head. “I’m  _kidding_.” Was that mean? Yes, but Michael had a sick sense of humor at times and Luke was obviously a little gullible. “Total lie. I haven’t dated a lot of guys.” Beneath the table, Michael nudged his foot against Luke’s ankle to try and reassure him a little. “Just one guy...and it wasn’t really that we dated. We met last summer while my family and I were on vacation in Hawaii. We just kind of hit it off, you know? He loved the whole...outdoors, beach-y type vacation about as much as I did so we’d meet up and hang out in arcades and stuff.” He wasn’t sure if he ought to tell Luke that had been his first time having sex with someone so Michael distracted himself for a moment with his drink.   
  
“We...really...hit it off…” Michael said, attempting to imply that the boy from Hawaii had been his first without having to say it. It wasn’t something he’d ever actually told anyone, not even Calum or Ashton, and it seemed odd telling his current boyfriend. The memories were fond and Michael had been sad to part ways with the boy but he hadn’t felt for him the way he did Luke. The singer sitting across the table from him was something far deeper than Michael could have ever expected. “What about you? I mean I know about the one guy because I asked you about it when we first slept together but...anyone else?” Michael hadn’t exactly kept track of Luke’s dating life over the years and he couldn’t remember who as before Amber or who was before that girl. He also didn’t want to think about it because he was worried about what his stupid brain would do if he did. Michael knew it would try and convince him he wasn’t worth Luke’s time or that he’d always have a list to be compared to.

 

**LUKE:** Luke smirked when Michael accused him of making it hard not to think about sex, and his smile broadened at the mention of edible body glitter. "That sounds amazing," he admitted, "You'd look good covered in glitter." Luke kind of wanted to try it too, and not just for sex - there were a lot of things he wanted to try on stage, glitter and makeup an nail polish, but he couldn't because people wouldn't understand. His parents would be embarrassed. Luke was afraid it'd out him almost as fast as kissing Michael would.

He wondered how many other guys Michael had gotten with before him, so he asked - and he couldn't help the way his face fell when his boyfriend said there were 'lots' of them, that he was always getting messages on Grindr. Then Michael started laughing and  _Luke_  didn't think it was funny until the other boy explained that he was kidding. Luke let out an exasperated breath, rolling his eyes. "You're such an ass," he retorted with a slight smile, relieved despite what he said. The truth was that Michael hadn't dated a lot of guys which made Luke feel better because he hadn't either.

Michael told him that there had been one guy, who he met last summer in Hawaii, and Luke was already jealous even though it was stupid. It sounded like he and Michael had a lot in common, and he realized when his boyfriend emphasized how  _much_  they hit it off that the guy in Hawaii was his first (probably). Luke didn't have the guts to explicitly  _ask_  Michael if that was true, but he had a feeling it was. Michael asked about his experience and it distracted Luke from the whole Hawaii thing. "That was the only guy." The one he mentioned to Michael the first time they had sex. "We weren't dating either. I just... it was just sex." But it was his first time with a guy. "You know Amber and I were off and on for two years." In between that, he hooked up with a few other girls; Lindsey, Becky, Julia. "But my first..." since he guessed they were talking about that, "was Chloe Tate, freshman year. She was a year ahead of us." It was okay. The first time he didn't know what the fuck he was doing, and he wasn't even sure he wanted to do it - but  _she_  wanted to do it and he remembered thinking how gay it would look to say no, but it wasn't great.

Luke knew it was lame to bring up exes on a date, but he wanted to know what he was up against, and he wanted to be what Michael needed - but he wasn't totally sure what that was. "Does that mean I'm your first boyfriend?" He liked that. "You're my first." It was a different kind of first than sex but it was still important. "Can't complain so far. You're cute, you're sexy, you're sweet when you want to be..." and a pain in the ass when he didn't want to be - that whole Grindr joke, "Great taste in music - and guys. There's no one else I'd wanna be here with."

 

**MICHAEL:**  Michael shifted a bit uncomfortably at the mention of Amber and nodded at the question because he didn’t know what else to say. There was still the fact that Luke had cheated on her, and that Michael had helped him do so. After this conversation he hoped they didn’t have to bring Amber up again even if they would cross paths with her at school. If anyone ever found out about him and Luke she would likely put the pieces together, and that was a fall out that Michael didn’t want to deal with. He couldn’t imagine Luke would want to either. Michael also hadn’t expected to his boyfriend to blurt out the first person he’d ever slept with so overtly and he blinked at Luke. “Oh. Yeah, I know who she is.” Another popular girl, a cheerleader, that whole type. Michael had never spoken to her but every freshman guy had wanted to hook up with her, except him. “Guess you got lucky with her then, huh?” Michael commented, a faint smile on his lips. Truthfully, it kind of made his stomach squirm and for a brief moment he wondered if Luke would feel like he was missing something by being with him. Would Luke miss girls and what they had to offer? Things Michael couldn’t offer him? He shook his head, knowing it was stupid to assume something like that based on Luke’s sexual identity. Michael felt ashamed for a moment.   
  
“What do you think?” Michael shot back with a laugh. “’Course it means you’re my first boyfriend.” He’d gathered that he was Luke’s first boyfriend but he smiled nonetheless. Michael rolled his eyes as Luke complimented  himself indirectly, but his expression softened when he said there was no one else he’d want to be here with. Michael bit down on his lower lip and kicked his leg under the table gently. “Sweet talker.” It was all he could manage before their server returned to their table with food and Michael sat back so he wouldn’t be in the way. She asked if there was anything else they needed and when it was confirmed they didn’t she left. Michael picked up the chopsticks and positioned them between his fingers. “Looks and smells okay,” he quipped, and shoved a mouthful of noodles into his mouth because what were manners? He wasn’t trying to impress anyone.   
  
Half an hour later, having shared his food with Luke’s and Luke sharing his as well, their bill was paid and they left the restaurant. Michael didn’t hesitate to slide his hand into Luke’s as they made their way to the arena with a throng of people headed in the same direction. No one spared them a second glance and Michael marveled at this. It was so different from Manassas. If he and Luke walked down the street holding hands in their hometown everyone would be staring and it would be a matter of an hour before everyone knew. In D.C. nobody seemed to give a shit. Everyone was too busy worrying about themselves and getting to the front of the line. Michael was glad they had VIP tickets that would make the crowd easier to handle since he wasn’t sure his anxiety could handle it. He’d never been good in crowds.   
  
The closer they got the more tightly Michael held onto Luke’s hand but there was excitement moving through him as well that left him jittery and unable to stay still. He gave Luke an apologetic look for being annoying as they entered in through the VIP entrance, had their tickets checked, and given their passes. A smaller crowd of people caught his eye and and Michael grinned. “Merch table? I wanna buy some shirts.” He practically dragged Luke over to the line. Michael knew he ought not to spend the money on concert merch since the van was still needed, but he also wanted something to commemorate their first date. While they waited, Michael took out his phone because he wanted more pictures of the two of them and there was a brief moment that he felt bummed he couldn’t post them on Instagram so everyone knew about it. It passed quickly enough and when they reached the table Michael asked to see two different shirts with tour dates on them, and when he got them, held one up to Luke’s chest. “What size do you wear?” he asked. “Merch is on me as well because I know those tickets were expensive.” Michael was still hanging onto the fact that Luke’s wealth didn’t make a bit of difference in their relationship. Luke paid for the tickets so Michael paid for dinner and would buy the shirts.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke wouldn't say he got lucky with Chloe, so he shrugged in response. He was realizing what a bad idea it was to talk about this on a date so he changed the subject to something better: the fact that he got lucky with Michael, not any of his exes. He grinned back at the other boy triumphantly when his boyfriend accused him of being a sweet talker. The food came quickly which was great, and it tasted good too. Dinner was over in half an hour, then they left and walked back to the arena together, Michael's hand in his. Luke's apprehension of some jackass calling them out faded completely by the time they got in, because it was obvious that no one cared. Nothing bad was going to happen. Luke bet L.A. would be even better than this.

Right now everything was perfect, and Luke exchanged a reassuring smile at his boyfriend as they made it through the crowd, had their tickets checked, and looped their passes over their heads. Michael said he wanted to buy some shirts and Luke nodded in agreement, following his boyfriend over to the table. Michael took pictures, selfies of the two of them, while they waited in line and once they got to the front, his boyfriend surprised him by asking what size he wore. "Michael..." he didn't expect Michael to buy the merch too, because yeah the tickets were expensive but  _Luke_  didn't really pay for them. It came out of his allowance. "You don't have to do that." He insisted and so Luke caved with a smile, getting a medium.

After Michael got the shirts, and looked at the rest of the merchandise, Luke tugged him into the bathroom to swap out their shirts. There wasn't a line in the guy's room so nobody noticed when he ducked into the handicapped stall and pulled Michael in with him, laughing. Luke locked the door behind them and unbuttoned his shirt, shrugging out of it to swap for the new one. He tossed the white shirt into the bag the merch had come in, and once they'd both changed, he gestured for his boyfriend, slipping his arms over Michael's shoulders and tugging him into a kiss. Luke stood there kissing Michael for he didn't know how long, breaking away to catch his breath with an exhilarated grin.

That's when he heard voices and someone knocked on the stall door to see if it was occupied. With a sheepish half-smile, Luke unlocked it and stepped out of the stall, ignoring everybody else while he washed his hands (it just felt like a good thing to do after hanging out in a bathroom) before leading Michael out into the hall. "Let's take a selfie with our merch, we'll put it up to make Cal and Ash jealous." It was better to take one out here than next to a toilet - that'd be weird, right? There was no reason why they couldn't put some pictures of themselves online, as long as it wasn't them making out. He wasn't embarrassed about hanging out with Michael. So Luke took a few pictures of them together, angling them so the ATL logos on their shirts were visible.

 

**MICHAEL:**  For a split second Luke seemed like he was about to argue over who was buying the merch and when he relented, Michael grinned brightly. He paid for the shirts which were bagged and they left the line a few minutes later upon making sure there was nothing else they wanted. “Hey what-” Michael nearly protested as he was pulled into the bathroom and then into the handicap stall. He didn’t understand what Luke wanted until the singer was unbuttoning his shirt and swapping it out for the concert shirt they just bought. Michael laughed softly and took off the denim jacket he was wearing, hung it up on the hook on the door, and switched out his shirts. It amused him faintly that they looked all dressed up for about an hour of their date but it was part of the fun, he supposed. He was just about to grab his jacket to slip it back on when Luke’s arms slipped over his shoulders and Michael was drawn into a kiss. A groan left him when their lips met and his hands moved to Luke’s waist, fingers curling into the material of the concert shirt. Lips parted and his tongue slipped into Luke’s mouth, tasting him slowly and when it was broken, Michael’s cheeks were pink and he was a little breathless. For half a moment he thought if they just stayed in the bathroom and made out he’d be okay with that. Two weeks was a long time to go without something you were a little bit addicted to, and Luke was like a drug for Michael.   
  
People came into the bathroom which was their cue to leave and Michael tried not to make eye contact with anyone as he and Luke left the handicap stall together. He felt like they were looking at him with his pink cheeks and knowing exactly what they’d been doing in that stall. It made Michael’s heart flutter faintly and he was glad to be out of the bathroom. The arena was crawling with people so it wasn’t like he and Luke would run into those people again. “That’s a jerk move,” Michael laughed. “Let’s do it.” Luke angled the camera so their shirt logos showed and Michael stuck out his tongue, rock hands up, and he watched as his boyfriend posted it. It was a totally innocent picture and nothing about it suggested they were dating. Just two friends at a concert. It made Michael a little sad but it wouldn’t have to be this way forever. Once they were out of Virginia permanently they could be an out and proud couple. “They’re gonna hate us for not asking them to come along,” he laughed.   
  
Michael checked the time on his phone and it was nearly seven, which meant the opening band was about to play. “Let’s check ‘em out. I’ve heard Pierce the Veil is pretty good.” There were a lot of people so as the two of them made their way towards the floor entrance, Michael slipped his hand into Luke’s back pocket so he didn’t lose him in the crowd. The VIP entrance was much less busy and Michael was jittery with excitement as they were directed toward their seats, and when he realized how close they were to the stage he couldn’t believe it. “Jesus Christ...this is amazing…” Michael breathed. He’d been to concerts before but never this close. They would be able to tell if these guys shaved or not that day. Michael had never been more excited about a concert before.   
  
Pierce the Veil were on stage a few minutes later and even though Michael didn’t know much of their music they were fun to watch. He could barely wait the half an hour between sets and when All Time Low finally took the stage the arena exploded into sound and excitement. Michael was enthralled by how much detail he could see, how he could make out the features on each band member’s face because they were practically on top of the stage. He took pictures, sang at the top of his lungs and by the time it was over he felt like he had cotton in his ears and his throat was scratchy. Michael leaned against Luke as they waited for the slow moving crowd exiting the arena and laughed out loud. “That was fucking amazing. God, I can’t believe that just happened.” What he really wanted to do at the moment was jump on Luke and kiss him stupid but it was going to have to wait for now. Michael wasn’t ready to go home and leave this night behind. He liked being here with Luke and holding his hand in public. 

 

**LUKE:**  After the encore, the band finally left the stage and there was nothing left to do but leave the venue, but he wasn't in a rush. Neither was Michael. He slid an arm around the other boy's waist, and he grinned in agreement. The concert  _was_  amazing, both the bands were fucking awesome, and being pressed up against the barricade was more fun with Michael than it would've been with anyone else. "I definitely wanna see them again." The show was great and it gave him so many ideas for what 5sos could do someday - when they finally got to play arena shows. He and Michael slowly made their way out of the arena, and out onto the street.

It was only a block to the car, but Luke hesitated. "Hey, you want to take a walk?" When Michael agreed, he slipped his hand from his boyfriend's waist to his hand, and led him away from the parking lot and down 7th Street until they hit the big intersection at Constitution Avenue. On the other side was the park, leading to the Smithsonian and the ice rink and the national mall. They talked about the best parts of the concert, favorite songs, how it basically blew out of the water any concerts in Manassas either of them had seen. They crossed the street and Luke pointed out an unoccupied bench leading into the park. They'd been standing up and jumping around and screaming for three hours, and Luke wanted some alone time with Michael before they went back home. They took a seat on the bench.

Luke had been to good concerts before and he always had good tickets, but the people he used to hang out with didn't like the same music, they didn't know half the shit about the band that he did, and they didn't understand what it meant to him as a musician to go. But Michael did. "I'm really glad you came with me," Luke admitted, shifting to face the other boy, "It was so awesome." Biting his lip ring, he slid one hand over Michael's knee to his thigh, which felt warm under his palm through the denim. "And being able to touch you like this is..." he shook his head, cupping Michael's face with his free hand to tug him closer, "It's the best part." Luke leaned in then and kissed him.

Maybe that was a bad idea because the minute his tongue brushed against Michael's, the hot, wet warmth of the other boy's mouth made him moan. The kiss got more intense because he wanted Michael so fucking much, and he ran his hand up over his boyfriend's thigh to his hip, the small of his back, his ass, and then Luke was pulling Michael into his lap. He wanted Michael to straddle him in the park, wanted to feel his whole body pressed up against his, all that without breaking their kiss.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Luke stopped him before they even left the front part of the arena, and asked him to go on a walk which Michael agreed to. Their fingers laced together and he let Luke lead the way since he seemed to know where he was going and stuck close to him. The further away they made it from the arena, the less people there were around. The bright city lights caught Michael’s attention and he found himself slightly in awe of the feeling that surrounded him: happiness. It wasn’t a feeling that he was overly familiar with because his head could be a messy space at times but for now, Michael wasn’t thinking about any of that at all while his hand was in Luke’s and they approached the entrance to the park. They sat on one of the empty benches and Michael laughed softly. “Yeah, me too. It was amazing and really...thank you…” He didn’t know if he could really thank Luke enough. Michael hadn’t thought he’d ever be up that close to one of his favorite bands.   
  
His eyes dropped to the hand that touched his knee and then slid up along his thigh, a soft shiver moving down his spine at the warmth of Luke’s touch. Michael nodded at Luke’s words and murmured, “I know.” Luke kissed him then and he felt like he was falling but it wasn’t a scary sensation. Michael’s lips parted to accept his boyfriend’s tongue and Luke’s moan was echoed with one of his own. His heartbeat picked up and heat raced through him as he felt Luke’s hand on his ass, pulling him into his lap. Michael broke the kiss with a soft gasp. “Luke we-” he cut himself off almost immediately, and pressed his body against the one beneath him, mouth on Luke’s once more. Michael realized that at the moment he didn’t give a fuck who saw them. It had been two weeks, maybe longer, since they two of them had been able to touch and kiss like this. It was a long drive home and he didn’t want to wait that long for this. Michael was half tempted to dip into the van fund yet again just to get a hotel room for the night but decided against it.   
  
Michael’s fingers moved into Luke’s hair as they kissed, the texture of it sliding between them nice and soft. The guitarist’s teeth took hold of Luke’s bottom lip, along the lip ring, and tugged it playfully as his hips rolled down against his boyfriend’s. So far no one had showed up to witness what was happening and Michael felt himself getting hard. There was something a little exciting about doing this in such a public place where they could get caught. “Fuck, I love it when you kiss me like that,” he murmured softly against Luke’s lips. Michael gripped his hair gently and tugged his head back so he could easily get to his throat so he could kiss and nip at Luke's adam’s apple. It had been so hard for Michael not to invite Luke in after school every time they were in his driveway, but he also hadn’t wanted to rush back into sex. Now Michael had no real idea why as his stomach twisted with arousal and he breathed in the scent of his lover.   
  
“Let’s go back to my house. Everyone’ll be asleep so I can sneak you up to my room.” Not that Michael  _really_  had to sneak Luke in since his parents knew they were a couple and probably figured out they were having sex but the idea made it a little bit more exciting. Michael traced the tip if his tongue along the vein in the side of Luke’s neck up to his earlobe where he stopped, biting at it playfully. One hand slipped between their bodies and Michael shifted so he could palm Luke’s dick through the skinny jeans. “I want to ride you,” he whispered against the cartilage of Luke’s ear.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke grinned against Michael's lips as his boyfriend's protest cut off, sliding both hands over his ass while they kissed. Hands moved into his hair and he closed his eyes, relaxing into the press of Michael's body against his, his fingers sliding through locks of hair. Luke moaned into the kiss, the pressure of Michael tugging at his lip ring sending a jolt of pleasure straight to his cock. He arched up into the grind of Michael's hips, his own cock rubbing against the guitarist's growing erection through their jeans. Luke gasped into the kiss when Michael tugged his hair, tilting his head tip back to expose his throat, making a wordless sound of pleasure when Michael kissed his adam's apple. "I love it when you pull my hair," he mumbled, sliding one hand up the slope of Michael's back, the other hand dipping down between his jeans, underwear, and his ass.

Michael asked him back to his place and Luke smiled against his lips, nodding in agreement when he pointed out that everyone would be asleep so they could sneak in. Yeah, Michael's parents knew he was his boyfriend because he'd blurted it out like an idiot in their kitchen but that didn't mean they'd let him spend the night. Luke liked staying at Michael's house though, more than his own. He tilted his head to the side as his boyfriend's tongue slid along the line of his throat, laughing. It felt good. His expression faltered when he felt the other boy's hand slip between them, cupping his dick through his jeans. Luke groaned in response, biting his lip. Michael said that he wanted to ride him and it was the sexiest thing he had ever heard. They hadn't had sex in weeks and Luke didn't want to be pushy but  _fuck_ , he really wanted Michael tonight.

"God," he murmured, turning towards the warmth of Michael's voice, his breath against his ear. A shudder worked its way through Luke's body and he surged forward to kiss his lover hard. "You're such a tease," he complained softly. Luke loved it but it was a forty-five minute drive back to Manassas and that was a long time, thinking about having Michael straddling him, taking his cock, looking so fucking beautiful. "I want you to come all over me," he whispered into another kiss, all teeth and tongue. Suddenly he couldn't wait to get the hell out of D.C. and back home to Manassas. "Let's go." Luke kissed Michael again before popping him on the ass playfully, easing the other boy off his lap. Luke slid his arm around the guitarist, copping a feel of his ass as often as he could get away with on the way back to the car. That walk still seemed to take forever.

Luke waited until they got out of the city and over the bridge - the worst of the traffic - before he reached over for Michael's hand, running the pad of his thumb over his knuckles. Even touching him just like that - mostly innocent - got him hard, and as soon as they pulled onto the highway Luke was pushing eighty to get home.

 

**MICHAEL:**  A soft laugh left him when Luke complained that he was being a tease and it was followed with a shiver and a small groan as Michael at the idea of coming on his boyfriend. Luke’s hands were all over him, lips and teeth coming together and stoking the heat inside of him. Michael was reluctant to crawl off of Luke even after the pop to his ass, and when he did he felt slightly awkward about his half aroused state. He was glad it was dark so it couldn’t be so noticeable as he followed Luke to the parking garage where they’d left his car earlier. Forty-five minutes was going to feel like an eternity and as they made their way through the D.C. traffic, Michael kept his hands to himself. He didn’t want to distract Luke and cause an accident because he was horny, and once they reached the highway his eyes moved to the speedometer to see Luke was quickly reaching eighty. “You’re going to get pulled over,” he pointed out, “slow down because if you get arrested tonight I really don’t want to have to explain to your parents why.”   
  
Luke laid off the gas and as he did so, Michael raised the hand that was now in his and pressed his lips to his boyfriend’s knuckles. He kissed each one of them before turning Luke’s hand over in his own so he could press a kiss to his palm. Michael smiled faintly as he then pressed a kiss to the pad of each of Luke’s fingers, leaving his index finger for last so he could suck on it playfully. Michael waited for Luke to glance at him before pulling back on his finger, lips tight around the digit. He couldn’t help but smile at the shudder that rolled through his boyfriend. Michael let go of his hand so he could lean over the center console of the car and flick the tip of his tongue over Luke’s earlobe. It was probably a bad idea to be teasing the singer while they’re driving but Michael didn't really care. He wanted to be close to him right now. It still felt like they were such a long way from home. “It’s been two weeks,” Michael murmured against the cartilage of Luke’s ear. “It seems like fucking forever.” He was sure Luke was well aware of this fact. He nipped at his boyfriend’s earlobe playfully before returning to his seat with a grin.   
  
The sexual electricity in the car had Michael on edge, half-aroused, and so ready to be back in his room so he could get Luke out of his clothes. As predicted, the only lights on at his house were the outside garage lights and when the car was parked, Michael climbed out of it and went around to the other side to meet Luke. He reached for Luke’s shirt to take hold of it and pull his lover into an eager kiss that only lasted a few seconds. “We have to be quiet, okay?” The last time he’d sneaked Luke into his room while his parents were home he'd been wasted. Michael figured it couldn’t go any worse than that. He dug the keys out of his pocket as they walked up to the door and he was careful to be quiet as they went inside, closing and re-locking the door behind them. Michael pressed a finger to his lips to remind Luke to keep quiet as they made their way through the dark house and up the stairs to his room. They managed to get there without making a lot of noise and Michael closed the door behind him carefully, locking it as well.   
  
Michael had half a second’s thought to take this slowly but his body had other ideas and he practically launched himself onto Luke, their mouths meeting in a desperate kiss as Michael’s arms slid around his boyfriend’s neck. He didn’t want to wait any longer. Two weeks was long enough and he parted Luke’s lips with his tongue, a needy moan came out of Michael at the taste of him. His hands slid along the hem of Luke’s shirt and he was vaguely annoyed that Luke had switched out his button down for a t-shirt. A button down would have been a lot easier to get off of him. He broke the kiss to tug the shirt up and over Luke’s head and let it fall to the floor, and his own shirt followed a few seconds later. Michael broke the kiss when he needed to breathe but his lips never strayed too far. “Fuck, I’ve missed this…” he murmured softly. He closed his eyes as his mouth trailed down the side of Luke’s neck, and he kissed and sucked at his boyfriend’s skin while his hands traveled the length of his back. Michael loved everything about Luke’s body and he hummed softly as he kissed along his shoulder and collar.

 

**LUKE:**  Michael teased him all the way home, kissing his fingertips and sucking one into his mouth. Luke shuddered at the tight warmth of his boyfriend's mouth, and he swallowed thickly. The way Michael looked right now was the way he looked when he sucked cock, and it turned him on so much. Luke was so eager to have Michael and by the time he pulled up to the curb next to the Cliffords' house, he was so high key turned on he barely made it out of the car. The kiss was too short and Luke protested, tugging Michael's hips to his own until he pointed out they needed to be quiet. "You sure you don't wanna just fuck on the car?" he was half-joking, but also reluctant to let Michael go.

A bed would be a lot more comfortable than the car. So Luke followed Michael into the house, which was dark enough that he needed to walk in his boyfriend's footsteps to avoid running into anything. He let out a sigh of relief when he reached the bedroom, Michael closing the door behind them. He turned just in time as the guitarist jumped him with lips and tongue and arms around his neck. Luke bit back an eager, happy laugh. He slid his own hands along Michael's sides as they kissed, digging his nails into the denim of his belt loops and pressing himself tight to his lover. The sounds Michael made, the way he moaned into his mouth, made Luke shiver. He sucked on the tip of Michael's tongue, protesting softly when he broke the kiss to pull off their shirts. Luke let go of Michael to help with getting his own off, and he ran his hands up his bandmate's bare chest, slipping the pads of his thumbs over the nipples. Michael's skin was hot and soft against his own, and Luke moaned his agreement, tilting his head to the side with a pleasured sound. He loved it when Michael kissed his neck, lips touching his shoulder, and then his collar.

Hands ran up and down his back and Luke, eyes sliding closed as Michael touched him, tugged at the button and zipper of his boyfriend's jeans. He slipped his fingers into the gap between the jeans and Michael's underwear, working them both down over his hips and ass. He brushed the back of his hand against Michael's cock, hot and hard, and cupped it with a moan, grazing the tip with his fingertip. Luke blinked open his eyes and shifted to kiss Michael, impatient to get rid of the clothes. So he let go of his cock just long enough to undo his own jeans, shoving them down his thighs to his knees. Luke broke the kiss and backed up as he stepped out of his jeans, kicking off his shoes at the foot of Michael's bed.

"Come on," he coaxed his boyfriend, getting onto the bed once he was naked. He reached for Michael's waist to tug him forward and to him, but before letting the guitarist onto the bed, Luke steadied his hands on Michael's hips and leaned down to run his tongue along the length of his dick. "I missed this too," he murmured, blue eyes rolling up to meet green before he took Michael into his mouth, sucking along the slit of the head, tongue sliding along the ridge, the vein, the soft skin. Luke took as much of him as he could, fingers sliding from Michael's hips to his ass and digging in to pull him closer.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Every time Luke moaned it sent a shudder down his spine. Michael wanted more of it, like it was a drug, and he sucked a mark into his boyfriend's skin that would surely last for a few days. He didn’t care. As Luke’s hands worked open his jeans, Michael’s teeth nipped at his Adam’s apple and the faint touch to his dick caused him to suck in a sharp breath. He’d been turned on since the park in D.C. and it felt like everything was moving in slow motion. After two weeks his body was impatient to get down to business but Michael didn’t to rush it either. He wanted to enjoy it - enjoy Luke - because he hadn’t been able to in what felt like forever. Michael kicked off his shoes when the pants fell to his knees and stepped out of them to follow Luke back toward his bed. He blinked down at his bandmate, confused for a moment when he wasn’t allowed on the bed but the intention became clear a moment later as Luke’s tongue met his cock. “Oh god,” he moaned, eyes fluttering closed. Michael’s fingers found their way into Luke’s hair, sliding through the soft locks as his lover toyed with him. When he opened his eyes again, it was to meet blue ones and Michael bit at the inside of his cheek as warmth spread through his chest and stomach. The intensity of Luke’s gaze was something he didn’t feel like he could ever get used to.   
  
Michael tilted his head back, eyes closing once again as Luke took him further into his mouth, the hot wet of his mouth bringing soft gasps of pleasure from him. He had to work really hard to keep from bucking his hips forward and fucking Luke’s mouth. The nails digging into his ass brought a groan from him that was probably too loud and he had to stifle it. Michael didn’t want to wake his family and risk getting caught with his dick in his boyfriend’s mouth. “Babe,” he whimpers softly, his body becoming that much more impatient for release, “I’m gonna come if you don’t stop. Move back.” It was a playful demand and when Luke moved, Michael crawled onto the bed with him, and then on top of him. He lowered himself down onto his lover, craving the warmth of skin on skin and moaned softly into Luke’s mouth as he kissed him. Michael’s erection was caught between them and he rolled his hips so it slid along Luke’s. The slight friction sent a spark of neediness through Michael and he sucked on the other boy’s lower lip gently.   
  
It was broken a moment later and Michael smiled down at Luke. “I didn’t just miss the sex, you know. I missed what it came with.” He didn’t really know how to put in words what it had made him feel, how much Luke always made him feel wanted. Michael could feel his cheeks flush faintly and his eyes darted away from his boyfriend’s out of nervous habit. It was hard to look at someone when you felt so much for them, when you wanted to tell them so many thing and yet couldn’t find the words. Michael wondered if it was too soon to feel the way he did. They’d only just begun dating a week ago, this was their first  _real_  date, yet with everything that had occurred between them it felt like much longer. Michael didn’t want to just blurt out something silly so he shook his head and changed the conversation for now.   
  
“I uh...I’m not real sure how to do this...” he admitted, cheeks flushing darker. In theory, riding his boyfriend would be awesome but Michael didn’t exactly have a whole lot of experience with it. He knew Luke didn’t have much experience when it came to sex with guys either but he did have a lot more general experience than he did, so Michael was looking to him for a little bit of guidance. “Sorry. That’s probably not a huge turn on.” He felt a little self-conscious suddenly. Not just because of his inexperience but because he would be on top of Luke, everything on display, and that made his heart hammer inside his chest rapidly. Michael buried his face against his boyfriend’s neck and blew out a breath to steady his nerves, and when they calmed he kissed his way down the center of Luke’s chest. He stopped at his right nipple and took it between his teeth to tug it playfully.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke loved the sounds Michael made when he hollowed his cheeks and sucked on his dick, and he felt smug even after his boyfriend urged him to stop - because he didn't want to come early. He loved knowing how much he turned his bandmate on. Luke slid back onto the bed and smiled up at Michael, slipping his hands over pale shoulders as he crawled on top of him. He sucked in an uneven breath when the guitarist pressed against him, chests touching, thighs, Michael's erection sliding along his as he rolled his hips. Luke shuddered, digging his fingers into bright green hair while they kissed. It was broken after Michael snagged his bottom lip between his teeth, and Luke flushed, shifting his hips up against Michael's slowly.

Michael smiled down at him and Luke slid one hand from his hair to his face, caressing the side of Michael's jaw affectionately. "I know..." He didn't realize until now that he understood what his boyfriend meant; it wasn't just about the sex (which was fucking amazing), it was about everything Michael made him feel. And Luke liked to hear him say it out loud, liked to see it in the blush warming his cheeks, and the way his gaze slid away. "Michael..." Luke nudged his nose against his boyfriend's, smiling against his lips before parting them to kiss him again, tongue sliding against Michael's, along the inside of his lip, tasting him. Luke liked him so much. Sometimes he thought he might be in love, but he was afraid to say it. He didn't want Michael to make fun of him.

Luke wasn't worrying about that as much when Michael spoke again, admitting that he wasn't sure how to 'do' this. The harder Michael blushed, the wider it made the singer smile. He kind of liked knowing that he was the only one Michael had done this with - and even though  _he'd_ never done this with a guy, he sort of knew how it worked. Or... how it was supposed to work. He knew where to start. Luke opened his mouth to reply but hesitated at Michael's apology. He could hear how nervous, how self-conscious, Michael was and he sighed into the weight of his head against his neck. Michael was naked on top of him, and he wanted to ride his dick... how much more turned on could Luke get? He raised an eyebrow in surprise when Michael's lips started moving, arching into the touch with a gasp, his nipple caught between teeth. Luke moaned, clenching a handful of green hair between his fingers, and after a few seconds he couldn't stand it anymore so he pulled on Michael's hair, tugging the other boy's mouth to his roughly.

"Sorry," he mumbled the apology - in case he pulled too hard - in between kisses. Luke kissed Michael to reassure him, and broke it gently. "You always turn me on," he promised. He didn't want to tease his boyfriend. He wanted to make him feel good, comfortable... "You are so sexy, Michael." He kissed his chin, then along the guitarist's soft jaw, sucking on all the best parts until he nipped at Michael's ear, "Everything about you just... it drives me crazy," Luke said. He slid one hand down Michael's neck and over the curve of his back to his hips, then lower.

Luke's fingertips brushed against his entrance and along the cleft of his ass, and he murmured into Michael's neck, "Can you get the lube, baby?" Luke had forgotten where it was his boyfriend kept it (or if he'd moved it since the last time they had sex), and he leaned back against the bed, fingers grazing Michael's sides, his chest, as much of his boyfriend's skin as he could reach while he searched for the lube. Luke held out his hand for it and once the cap was popped, he poured a dime-sized amount into his palm. "Come here," he demanded, wrapping his free arm around Michael's neck to pull him close once more - and with the other boy on top of him, Luke could reach him without looking. He slipped one slicked finger along the line of Michael's ass, teasing his tight entrance, "Can I?" When Michael agreed, he worked his finger slowly inside of him.

 

**MICHAEL:**  A groan left Michael as a hand tangled in his hair and Luke pulled him up for a kiss. It was a little rougher than he would have expected but the mumbled apology made him feel better. “It’s okay,” he murmured against his lover’s lips. Luke’s words reassured him, chased away the insecurity and the self-consciousness. He knew deep down that what his boyfriend said was true and that he really meant it. It made his chest ache slightly to know that Luke cared about him that much. No one had ever called him sexy before and it sent a pleasant chill down Michael’s spine. It was still a hard thing to believe but he thought he was managing well. Luke’s fingers moved down his back and over his ass and he sucked in a sharp breath when fingertips brushed over his entrance. “Yeah.”   
  
Michael sat up on his knees and leaned over to dig the lube out of the nightstand drawer. Luke’s hands were all over him, causing him to smile faintly as they moved over his sides and his chest. His cock ached slightly from how hard he was and he was relieved when he finally found the bottle of lube and handed it to Luke. Michael watched, anticipatory, as the singer squeezed some into his palm and he bit down on his lower lip. A laugh left him when Luke made his demand and pulled him down for another kiss. Michael sucked in a sharp breath as Luke teased his hole and nodded when he asked for permission. “Y-yes...” All of his previous worries seemed to have washed away the moment Luke touched him and he closed his eyes, burying his face against his lover’s neck as a finger slipped into him. Michael groaned, his body shuddering faintly from the sting of the intrusion. It had only been a couple of weeks since they last had sex but it felt like forever, and he’d missed it more than he realized, that connection he felt when Luke was inside of him.   
  
Lips pressed against the side of Luke’s neck and he moaned softly. “Keep going. I’m good…” Michael shifted so he was sitting up on top of Luke, braced on his knees so it left room for his boyfriend to open him up. A second finger was added and Michael shifted slightly, rolling his hips so he could fuck himself on Luke’s fingers. He realized he could probably get off like this if he really wanted but the desire to have Luke’s dick in him was overwhelming. Michael didn’t have it in him at the moment to be worried about being on display, or the fact Luke had never seen him like this. He was too turned on, too needy and after a few minutes he drew in a shuddering breath. “Do you want to use a condom?” Michael had them. They’d used them each time they’d had sex but he hadn’t grabbed one this time.   
  
Before Luke had a chance to answer, Michael leaned over once more so he could get a condom out of the drawer, moaning softly as Luke’s fingers slipped out of him. He held out the condom to his boyfriend and shrugged. “I know we’ve always used one so...I don’t know…” He wanted to know what it would be like without it, how it would feel to have Luke come inside of him instead of into a rubber. Maybe they weren’t ready for that. Michael didn’t want to have anything between them but he also didn’t want Luke to feel like he had to do something he wasn’t ready for. “It’s up to you,” he offered.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke cradled Michael's head against his neck, stroking his hair to try to distract him from the initial discomfort. He went slow and steady, biting his own bottom lip hard. Michael was so hot, tight around his finger, and Luke loved the way it felt. Luke nodded in response to the encouragement, sliding his finger in and out of Michael, thrusting gently until he was fingering his boyfriend up to the second knuckle. Michael shifted on top of him, onto his hands and knees, and after a few more seconds Luke slid a second finger into him, stretching Michael open further. "You're so fucking hot." Luke meant to say something more romantic, maybe, but that was what he blurted out in a gasp, Michael's hips moving to take his fingers even deeper. "God, Michael..." Luke moaned his boyfriend's name, raising his head up to kiss the guitarist.

The kiss was broken a few seconds later, and Luke looked up at Michael. His shuddering breath was met by one of Luke's own, cock leaking between them, and he blinked in surprise when Michael mentioned the condom. Luke had forgotten about it and he made a wordless protest when Michael leaned away to grab one, his fingers slipping out of his ass, slick and warm. Michael held out the condom to him and Luke took it, glancing between the foil wrapper to his lover. They'd used a condom every other time they had sex, but now Michael was telling him it was up to him. Luke had never  _had_  sex without one before, but everybody said it was better. "We weren't dating before," he said softly, "I..." He didn't want to talk about Amber. It was safer to wear a condom if you were fucking around a lot, but he wasn't now and Michael couldn't get pregnant.

"I'm with you now," Luke promised, reaching for Michael with his free hand to pull him down into a kiss. "Only you. I don't think we need a condom." Neither of them were sick and they weren't planning on screwing around, so this would be okay. "You?" Even though Michael said it was his decision, Luke still wanted to make sure that he was okay with this - it felt like a  _their_  decision, not a  _his_ decision. He grinned when Michael agreed and dropped the condom somewhere on the bed, wrapping both arms around Michael. He kissed him deeply, reaching down between them to run his lubed fingers over his dick and balls. Luke broke the kiss with a gasp, sliding his hands from his own dick to Michael's hips, gripping them gently. "I can't wait, Mikey," he murmured weakly, arching his hips, erection sliding along Michael's ass. Luke wanted to be inside him so badly, wanted to watch Michael take his cock because  _fuck_ , it sounded so hot. He'd been thinking about it since D.C.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Luke wanted them to make the decision together and Michael hesitated for a few moments before nodded his agreement. They didn’t need it. Not now. It still felt like a really big step forward and as Michael as he leaned down to accept the kiss from his boyfriend, he murmured softly, “I trust you.” Then he lost himself in that kiss with a soft moan, and the condom was forgotten. The kiss was broken and Michael smiled faintly as Luke spoke, telling him he couldn’t wait. It was followed with a gasp as the singer’s hands gripped his hips and his cock slid along his ass. He could relate to the impatience Luke was feeling and rolled his hips back slightly, wanting the friction from it. “Okay...okay...hang on a sec…” Since they weren’t using a condom this time, Michael wanted to make sure they had plenty of lube to make it easier so he grabbed the bottle that had been tossed aside earlier and slid back on his lover so that he was straddling his thighs instead.   
  
“Soon. I promise.” Michael smiled down at the other boy as he poured a small amount of the lube into his palm, and then wrapped his around around Luke’s dick. It wasn’t that he was trying to tease but he liked to watch Luke’s reactions to his touch, the way his eyes fluttered and his back arched slightly and the soft sounds that came from his lips. It still seemed so surreal to Michael that  _he_  was the one that could make Luke feel this way. It made his heart race even more to know that he was the only one that would be doing this with Luke from now on. Michael slid his thumb along the head of his lover’s dick, spreading the pre-come to mix with the lube and he shivered when Luke moaned. “God, you are so gorgeous,” he murmured softly. There were so many attractive people in the world and yet none of them held a candle next to Luke. The singer was the only person he saw.   
  
Michael spread the lubricant down along Luke’s shaft and when he was satisfied with the other boy being fully slicked up, he let go of him and shifted on top of him once more. There was a nervous flutter in his belly as he took hold of the base of Luke’s shaft and lined the head up with his entrance. Michael’s eyes fluttered closed and he bit down on his lower lip as he sank down onto his lover slowly, a soft whine of a moan coming from him at the first sensation of discomfort. He didn’t mind it too much because it would pass and it would be worth it. Michael’s hands moved to rest against Luke’s chest as he took his boyfriend’s cock fully and paused to give himself a moment to adjust. His chest rose and fell with heavy breaths and he opened his eyes to look down at the singer, and offered a faint smile. “I missed how you feel inside of me,” he whispered, nails biting into the skin of Luke’s chest gently.   
  
He was careful not to press too hard on Luke as he raised himself up slightly, experimental, before sliding down on his boyfriend again. Michael moaned, louder than he probably should have and he hoped no one was awake to hear him. He wanted to look into Luke’s eyes as he rode him but it felt like too much, like it was too intense and his cheeks flushed. Mostly, Michael still felt a tiny bit self-conscious again about the fact Luke could see every part of him so completely. The guitarist sucked in a sharp breath as he figured out a rhythm and took Luke as deep as he could inside of him. Soft moans and pants fell from his lips as Michael rode him, already feeling like he might come way too soon. He shifted, and the head of Luke’s cock brushed against his sweet spot and he gasped sharply. “Fuck...Luke...right there…” he keened. This time his eyes opened without him thinking about it and he looked down at this lover as he rode him faster, harder, one hand moving to grip the headboard to keep his balance as his climax crashed into him. Michael cried out, his whole body shuddering on top of Luke’s, tightening on his dick, as he came, hot white stripes painting his boyfriend’s chest. He swore he saw stars burst in front of his vision, the sensation white hot and sudden. Michael loved every fucking second of it.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke tilted his head back with a gasp, closing his eyes at the first sensation of it: it was  _so much better_  without a condom. He could feel the muscles of Michael's entrance, tight and hot, pressing in on his cock, the way he made room for him, how he could feel Michael pulsing around him. Luke's eyes fluttered open when he heard his voice, the words jerking something deep in his belly, in his cock too, and he ran a hand along Michael's thigh. "It's really me this time," he murmured breathlessly, "No rubber. Just us. Fuck, you feel so good." This was a thousand times better than fucking with a condom, it was like his senses were cranked to ten and he could feel  _everything_. "Michael," he moaned his name as the guitarist started to move for him.

Luke slid his hands over the outsides of Michael's thighs as the other boy rode him, gripping his hips as they rolled forward, slipping up and down with each thrust. He moaned every time his balls touched Michael's ass, skin smacking together, slick and wet, the guitarist taking him so deep he could barely see straight. Luke jerked his own hips to meet the rhythm, panting in time with his lover. Michael keened and Luke cried out, the sound of it snapping his hips up into the other boy, nails digging into his hips. "C'mon, Mikey," he urged, panting hard as the pace picked up and Michael's arm stretched over his head, gripping the headboard. It rattled behind Luke's head and he couldn't get enough of it, enough of Michael on top of him, naked and flushed and so fucking sexy Luke wanted to get him off over and over  _and over_  again. "Say my name," he begged as Michael cried out - and seconds later the other boy's muscles clenched so tight around Luke's cock that his spine bowed off the bed.It was the hardest he'd ever come.

He felt the hot wetness of Michael's release on his chest, already slick and warm from sweat. Luke loved it. He was still gasping as he came down from the orgasm, blinking the spots away from his eyes to get a good look at Michael. He loved the lines of his body, from his hips to his stomach to his neck. He loved every inch of skin he could see. Luke eased up his grip on Michael's hips, running his fingertips over the crescent-shaped nail marks in the skin. His fingers glided up Michael's sides and Luke wrapped his arms around his shoulders to pull him down on top of him, close enough to kiss. Luke kissed him hard and deep, tongues and teeth, and with a soft sound he shifted, started to sit up with Michael still in his lap, still on his dick, but thought better of it and rolled over instead. Once Michael was on his back on the bed, Luke gripped his knees in both hands and slid out of him slowly. He spread Michael's legs when he did it, because he wanted to see it. Luke bit his bottom lip at the sight of his own cum dripping out of Michael's ass, still loose and wet. He felt this deep seated surge of possessiveness, of satisfaction.

Luke glanced up the length of Michael's body to his face and he smiled slightly, shifting forward to brace his forearms on either side of his torso. "That was fucking amazing," he grinned down at Michael, feeling smug as he leaned in for a kiss, gentler now, "Do I get this every time I take you to a concert?" He could get used to it.

 

**MICHAEL:**  Warmth shot through Michael when Luke came, causing a soft groan to slip out of him as he started to come down from the high of his orgasm. It was a new feeling - a good feeling - without the barrier of a condom. He felt connected to Luke in a way he hadn’t before and he smiled to himself. The sting of nails biting into his skin hardly fazed him at all. Michael wasn’t even worried about the fact they were probably louder than they ought to have been. He looked down at his lover, breathless and smiled just before he was pulled down for a kiss, moaning softly into it as their teeth and tongues clashed. It was over a moment later and Michael gasped as Luke suddenly rolled them over and he was on his back against the bed. He blinked as Luke took hold of his knees, followed by a moan when the singer slid out of him and spread his legs. “What are you doing?” he mumbled softly. Michael flushed when he realized what Luke was looking at, and surprisingly he didn’t feel vulnerable at all.   
  
The next kiss that he received was much gentler than the first and when it was broken, Luke’s question made him laugh. “Mmm...guess you’ll have to find out,” he teased. Not that Michael could hold out until the next concert before they slept together again. Two weeks had felt like an eternity to Michael so there was no way he was going to make either of them wait that long again. If he wasn’t so tired now from the concert and then sex, Michael probably would have been able to go a second round but he was beat.   
  
Luke was pressed against him and he could feel the stickiness of his release between their skin. He was going to find something to clean them up but the idea of moving sounded really terrible at the moment. If his parents weren’t home he would have suggested a shower but that was way too risky. For now he let it go and moved a hand up to run his fingers through Luke’s hair gently. Michael cupped his cheek then and smiled gently before kissing him. Nothing seemed to matter anymore, not their history, not the fight they had, none of it. Luke was here with him, wanted to be with only him and Michael was happier than he’d been in a long time. “Thank you for tonight,” he whispered against his lover’s lips. “It was amazing and this...us...I’m really happy with you.” He hadn’t really meant to get sappy or emotional and Michael bit down on his lower lip, partially braced for Luke to poke fun at him for it.   
  
He didn’t really give his boyfriend the chance before he moved beneath him. “We should get cleaned up. I have a towel on the back of my chair. I only used it to shower earlier. It’s still clean.” Michael wiggled beneath Luke until he could slide out from under him and off the bed. He crossed the room and grabbed the towel off the back of the chair, balled it up, and tossed it at Luke so he could wipe the come off his chest before it dried. Michael crawled back into the bed and grabbed the sheet to pull it up over his lower half, away from any wet spots that may have happened. “Stay with me tonight?” He asked softly, eyes already half closed and a yawn working its way out of him.

 

**LUKE:**  Luke smiled down at Michael - all dimples - as the other boy reached for him, running fingers through his hair. The singer leaned into the touch as the guitarist's hand slipped down to cup his cheek and he kissed Michael. Michael broke the kiss first, murmuring to him sweet things Luke didn't expect - a thank you for tonight, for how amazing it was, and that he was  _happy_  with him. Luke blinked at him, surprised, but he didn't have a chance to respond before the other boy shifted under him. Michael remarked that they should clean up and Luke nodded in agreement, sitting up to watch as Michael cross the room to grab the towel. He caught it with one hand, wiping down his chest and his dick. Luke hesitated, unsure of what to do with the towel, until he figured out where the hamper was. Once the towel was taken care of and they were both cleaned up, he crawled back into the bed with Michael.

"Yeah," Luke agreed to stay with him, and he rolled onto his side to face Michael, sliding one hand over the other boy's waist, spooning him from behind. Luke blinked at bright green hair, fingertips lightly stroking the Michael's pelvis and hip lines. Michael hardly ever said that kind of stuff when they were messing around before, and it was so weird to Luke that two weeks ago everything had gone to shit. Now it was so much better. He guessed a part of himself wondered if Michael liked him as much as  _he_  liked Michael... what he said just now, that proved he did. "Tonight was great," he agreed softly, belatedly, murmuring the words into Michael's hair. The concert, yeah, but he wasn't talking about the music. He was talking about getting to walk around in public with Michael, surprise him with something Luke knew he'd like, and see All Time Low together. Luke didn't think he'd ever forget it.

"I'm happy with you too," he promised, in a voice so low it was almost a whisper. "You make everything better." Luke pressed a kiss to the back of Michael's head, nuzzling his lover's neck and the back of his ear. Something felt so different about tonight - maybe it was their first date, or holding hands in public, or having sex without a condom, or having sex for the first time as boyfriends. Or all of those things. The first time Michael said that what they had made him really happy. Luke smiled again, burying his face against his lover's neck, and never wanted to let him go.


End file.
